Friends Forever, Maybe Not Year 7
by Krstna
Summary: It's time to grow up and face the responsibilities of the adult world. But for the students its the most difficult lesson they've ever had to learn
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling. I do not own the rights to the Harry Potter universe or make any money from writing this story. The characters have been borrowed to fit my purpose and the plot … well most of it is mine, and you'll know if it isn't.**

Year 7: Chapter 1

"Oh come and stir my cauldron, And if you do it right, I'll boil you up some hot, strong love To keep you warm tonight."

Frank watched as Victor twirled his mother around the floor. They looked so happy together. Watching them he realised that he had never truly seen his mother happy before. He had always assumed that she was and he knew that in the past she had been. But this was the first time he could see the happiness written over her face.

He had always hoped that he was enough to keep her happy. But that had been a childish thought. As he had grown he had come to understand the truth, you can only be so much for someone. He was his mother's son that would never change. He would always love her and she would love him. But he couldn't spend forever with her. He had his own life to lead. She needed somebody that would dedicate their life to her. And that was what Victor had done.

He had underestimated Victor to begin with. He had thought that the man was a passing fling. But watching them together he could see how much they loved each other. Frank couldn't help but wonder if his father had once made his mother look like that. If she had smiled so much when they were together. But it was a question he would never ask.

"Do you think I'll have to stop calling her Mrs L now?"

Frank turned to look at his best friend in the world Joseph Wild. They had known each other for seven years, been through the ups and the downs. They had started Hogwarts together, been placed in the same house and spent seven long years in each others constant company. Now they were both men, no longer students out in the real world. And Joe was still his constant companion.

"Well she is Mrs Cooper now."

"But Mrs C doesn't sound anywhere near as good as Mrs L!"

Frank grinned at his friend. Maybe Joe wanted to have something remain the same in the sea of ever changing life. They had learnt early on that things couldn't and wouldn't remain as they once were. They had both lost their fathers to death, and Joe's mother had been missing presumed dead for ten months. They had watched as their friends had lost loved ones and had even lost a close friend themselves. Now it felt like something else was being lost, but really Frank thought something was being gained.

The two boys watched as Victor and Augusta finished their first dance as a married couple. The ceremony had been a small event held in the local church near the Longbottom residence. Frank had walked his mother down the aisle before taking a seat next to his girlfriend Alice and Joe. After that they had gone back up to the house where the garden was transformed into the reception and they had happily eaten.

Frank had been rather surprised by the lack of formal arrangements. He had always thought that his mother would demand him to have assigned seating at his wedding. But she hadn't at her own. Although he had to admit that there weren't that many guests. His Uncle Algie and Aunt Enid made up the brides family along with himself and Victors sisters Gloria and Sharon were his only family members.

There were non-family members there Alice of course along with Joe and his two brothers Anton and Kyle. A small group of his mother's friends and Victors. Then there were the people who worked in 'Little Red Books' publishing with Victor. In all there were about thirty five people. It was small and intermit, which Frank thought made it nicer.

For Frank though it also meant he didn't have to worry about going around and speaking to people. He saw Algie and Enid on a daily basis and he didn't know the others. So his mother was more than happy to let him sit on a table with the three Wild boys and Alice.

"Miss Scott would you care to dance?"

A faster song was just starting up and Anton was tapping his foot along to it. Frank hadn't been paying attention to Alice's hints that she wanted to dance. She looked at him for a moment before offering her hand to Anton. Frank watched them move up to the make-shift dance floor and start jumping around as if they were possessed.

"Anton could never dance."

Kyle was laughing as he sipped on his nettlewine. Frank watched as Anton slipped and slid across the floor before jumping to his feet as if he had meant to do such a thing. While Kyle was laughing Frank turned to Joe. His friend looked down.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Don't lie Joe its written all over your face."

His friend just picked up his drink. His eyes were locked on Alice. Frank followed the gaze. His girlfriend looked as stunning as ever in his eyes. She had chosen to wear a soft lilac colour dress robe that was fitted to her figure. It was a nice match that complimented her, and didn't clash with his mother's robes (which were offset white with a pink tinge). He thought that the colour also suited his dark blue robes and made them look perfect together (not that he knew much about colour schemes, but Anton had claimed that Alice matched with both Frank and Joe's blue robes).

As Alice turned and grinned at him he begun to wonder if that was what was wrong with Joe. Was his friend once more suffering from girl trouble? It had been a running joke in Hogwarts. Joe was the kind of guy that stopped girls in their tracks. He was tall, almost six foot, with a slim figure. Yet his slim frame didn't make him look to thin. It actually made him look like a guy that a girl could take home and feed up. It was something his mother always claimed that a good girl would want to do to him. His dark hair set off his natural tanned skin and his sparkling grey blue eyes set girls gossiping. And yet Joe had always been terrible around girls.

Frank had lost count of the number of times that the boy had gotten tongue tied around girls that he found attractive. It had become accustom for Joe to run away as if someone had just called him for some ultra important reason. But Frank had honestly thought that Joe was getting better. He had managed to ask Ginny out a number of years back and ever since then the occasions of him being scared off by a girl had become less and less. It was true that only a few months earlier when he had tried to ask out Lesley Hopkins he had gotten tongue tied and ran off, but that had been the first time in about two years.

But then Frank considered that the girl his mate had fallen for this time was different to all the others. Branwen Ddraig was getting over the loss of her grandfather. Tad had been killed back in May in a horrible attack in Hogsmeade village. They had been there. Frank would occasionally have nightmares about that attack, all those injured, people killed and the Death Eaters. He had collected them that action had helped to get him onto the Auror training.

Frank glanced at Joe. He was lost in his own thoughts. Branwen had been invited to the wedding as Joe's guest. But she hadn't chosen to attend. Frank knew that they would be returning to Hogwarts in the morning but he was still surprised. Maybe the two had had a fight. He knew that they weren't dating. He also knew that they had kissed whilst in Hogwarts, at the train station after Hogwarts, and countless times during the summer. But there was no dating involved.

"So what was her excuse then?"

Joe didn't seem to be listening. Frank threw an olive at the man. He shrugged and looked at him.

"What was that for?"

"I asked you a question."

"Wasn't listening."

"Well that was obvious. I asked what Branwen's excuse for not coming was."

"They're putting up the headstone for Tad today. She wanted to be there with her father for that."

"Oh."

Joe just nodded. Frank though moved his chair closer to his friend so that Kyle wouldn't hear.

"So what's going on with the two of you?"

"We're just friends."

"And where have I heard that one before?"

They both grinned remembering another two people who had always claimed to be 'just friends'. Joe though picked up his glass and took a sip before answering.

"She's going back to Hogwarts and I'm not. Let's be honest here it can't work out."

"Alice is going back to Hogwarts."

"Yes but the pair of you are practically married already. It's different for me and Branwen. Our relationship is still new, that is if it's even considered a relationship. How can it work?"

Frank looked over to where his mother and Victor were sitting with his sisters. They looked so happy together. With a sigh Frank spoke.

"I don't know mate. It just does."

* * *

So welcome back everybody. Did you miss me? Just joking around. So year seven in Hogwarts is starting then but of course Frank and Joe have left the others behind. They're already out in the 'real world'. But not to worry I won't be leaving the two of them out. I've got a plan written out (and its next to me on the desk) and the two boys are there due to be in the story (my guess is that they will be in it more than the plan says because they're pushy and will demand more time)

So I hope you like the start. Basically Mrs Longbottom had to remarry because I killed Alice's parents off and then remembered a quote from Azkaban where Neville claims to have witnessed his grandfather's death. So step up Victor Cooper, Neville's grandfather!

More soon.

Kris xx


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"You don't look too good dad. Maybe you should go lie down."

Lily watched as her father shook his head. She was so worried about him. Over the last few weeks she had watched as his strength drained away and after many arguments she finally forced him to go to a doctor. It had been difficult to do. Pa Evans was back in London and Petunia had gone on a family holiday with her fiancé Vernon Dursley and his family.

Lily had waited for news phoning Pa Evans every night with a latest update. Then they got the news that sent her into spasm. Her father's health was failing once more, the cancer had returned. The chemotherapy was due to start up again.

By the time Petunia returned home Lily and her father had moved back down to London to be with Pa Evans. Her father had first been treated in London because Petunia had needed the support of their grandfather. Now on the second time it was Lily wanting the support. So Petunia had moved in and the four were living in the big house once more.

Lily had thought maybe the move would be easier on her in some ways. She realised that it meant Petunia was further away from 'her Vernon' but Lily was closer to her support network. Her friends had somehow made London the meeting ground and now she was closer. It was a huge help in the beginning what with the fact that she was unable to take her apparition test until the middle of July.

Lily remembered the apparition test even now as a daunting affair. She and Peter had arranged to be tested on the same day at the same time. So that morning she had met him outside the visitor's entrance to the ministry and they had entered together. She had been really nervous and found it rather surprising that Peter hadn't been. What had been more surprising was that Peter passed and she didn't. She had been the only one to fail. She had spliced her left arm from her body.

Two weeks later she had been all the worse for her trip to the ministry. But that time she passed without a problem. This allowed meeting with the others to be so much easier. But she refused to meet up often. Pa Evans still had no idea about witchcraft and Hogwarts. So Lily would leave the house as if getting the tube and then apparate to the location. She spent a few nights with Amanda and Branwen in Sirius' house. She met up with Remus twice. But on the whole she stayed with her father.

She was determined to spend as much time with him as possible. The past few years had taught her that life was a very short existence. That one minute you could be walking around joking with friends and the next in a box under the ground. She knew it was a blunt way to think but it was true. She was determined to live her life as best she could and she didn't want to miss out on any time with her father. Surely it wouldn't be long until he left her for good.

"You need to stop worrying about me honey."

"But I do dad."

He gave her a weak and watery smile.

"Have you finished packing?"

She nodded.

"Good. Are you excited? It is your last year after all."

"I'd rather I didn't have to go. I don't want to leave you."

Dudley Evans wrapped an arm around his daughter and kissed her forehead.

"Don't worry about me. I've still got Tuney and Pa to look out for me. I want you to enjoy your last year."

Lily tried to smile, really she did. But it felt impossible.

"You've never told me about Hogwarts before."

She knew he was throwing her a lifeline. Giving her something to concentrate on. She closed her eyes and brought to the front of her mind the most wonderful place she had ever seen before. She took in all the details making sure that she wouldn't miss something out.

"Hogwarts is up in the mountains in Scotland. It's surrounded by lochs and rolling mountains. It's one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen. And I wish that I could take you there because I know you'd love it. But all you would see is a ruined castle with a sign saying unsafe. It's a precaution to make sure that no muggles find it."

"But dad it's so amazing. It's a real castle. I go to school in a castle! And I can't believe I never told you that before. And it's just massive; it's bigger than any other castle we've seen. There are seven stories with turrets and towers. And inside well…"

She looked at her father with a smile on her face.

"It should be rundown in places. I mean it's so old there should be ceilings and walls meeting at unexpected angles but because of magic everything fits together smoothly. I don't think it started off as it is now, I'm sure its grown and as such there are all these secret passageways to other floors, whole corridors that don't lead anywhere. And nobody knows all the secrets of the school it would be impossible."

"And there are so many rooms. I mean just to give brief examples here. In the dungeon area we have our potions classroom. It's also where the potion master lives, Professor Slughorn. It use to be where Professor Malfoy lived but she resigned. But there are also two common rooms on this level the Slytherins and the Hufflepuff. I couldn't tell you where though because that's a secret that only people in those houses can know."

"The kitchens are there too though. And that's where the house elves work. Dad I swear I've never seen anything like a house elf before. They're really small but have these huge bat like ears and the most enormous eyes that you've ever seen. I don't know it's hard to imagine I don't think it's even possible unless you've seen one."

Lily drew a breath and looked closely at her father.

"I'm rambling and this must be boring. I'll stop."

"No Lily keep going. I want to know all about Hogwarts. After all it's where you've spent all this time. Please humour me."

Lily gave a short little nod.

"Okay well directly above the kitchen is the Great Hall. It's unbelievable dad honestly. The ceiling mimics the weather conditions outside, there are candles that float through the air and it feels really magical. It's the first room we see when we start there in our first year. There are five long tables one for the professors and then one for each of the four houses. We have all our meals in there and at Halloween there's a brilliant feast. We've even had some balls and dances there in the past."

"Also on the ground level is the Entrance Hall. It's got a flagstone floor and these double oak doors that open in a westerly direction. There's this amazing marble staircase in the hall that leads up to the first floor and all these others doors that led off to different places, like the Great Hall, the dungeons, potion room and Slytherin common room, and the kitchens and Hufflepuff common room."

"And oh we have a competition between the houses each year. The house that gets the most points wins the house cup. It's a pretty standard thing. You get points if you answer questions correctly, if your homework is exceptional. If you help the professors or students in some manner and when you win Quidditch matches. And of course you lose points for misbehaving. We lose lots of points in Gryffindor thanks to the boys in my year and Amanda. They tend to do their own thing. But my point is that the points are measured in these huge hour glasses that are kept in the hall. Everyday when we go outside we can see them."

"Then on floors one up to seven you basically have the classrooms. But the hospital wing is on the third floor, it use to be on the sixth but it moved. That happens sometimes; sometimes the staircases change places and the rooms. The library is on the fourth floor while the fifth is basically the prefect and head rooms. It's where we have meetings; it's where the special bathrooms are."

"But the best place of them all is the seventh floor. There's a portrait of a fat lady –"

"Lily that isn't a nice thing to say!"

It was the first time he had interrupted her. Lily had been watching his face; it was shining with all the information of Hogwarts. She could tell that he loved the images it was bringing to his mind.

"I'm not being disrespectful dad the portrait is of a fat lady in a pink dress. That's what the caption says under the painting. We all call her that. Anyway we give her a password and she opens up into the Gryffindor common room. And dad it's fantastic. The common room is filled with these squashy armchairs, big sofas, tables to do homework on and this giant fireplace. We spend so much time there. We have parties, and play games it's the centre of the Gryffindor life."

"Then there's this tower just off the common room and that's where the dorms are. There are two separate entrances one for girls and one for boys. And the boys can't come up to our rooms because there's a spell that turns the stairs to a slide to stop them. But the rooms dad. It's circular with four poster beds and a window which lets you see out onto he entire grounds."

"What are the grounds like Lily?"

"Well there's Hagrids cabin. He's the keeper of keys and he lives in the grounds. It a big circular stone building with a pumpkin patch behind it. Then there are these lush green lawns that in winter are covered in snow. We have flower beds near the greenhouses were Herbology is taught. Then there is this massive forest which we are forbidden to go into and a tree called the whomping willow which fights anything that comes near it. But the best part is the lake. It's to the south of the castle and it's beautiful."

"Are you glad that you went there Lily?"

She looked at her father and smiled.

"I wouldn't want to go anywhere else. I love Hogwarts. I love the castle; I love the town Hogsmeade, which is just by it. My friends are wonderful and if I hadn't have gone there I wouldn't have known so much about myself. Thank you so much for letting me."

She hugged him close. His chuckling laughter penetrated her mind. It was the first time in weeks she had heard him laugh.

"I had no say. When your mother heard it was called Hogwarts she said you just had to go."

"What? Why?"

Dudley chuckled again.

"Hogwarts is the name of a type of Lily. You know how much your mother loved flowers and it seemed right to her that her daughter should go to a school that meant her namesake."

Lily laughed holding her father tightly.

"I love you dad."

"I love you too Lily."

He kissed her forehead and she leaned into him. She was extremely careful though not to put too much weight against his body. She didn't want to cause him any strain. When he spoke next though there was a teasing sound to his voice.

"Lily darling tell me about the boys then?"

Her eyes were sparkling and a laugh sat close to her lips.

"Daddy you can't be interested in the boys at Hogwarts!"

His chuckle was like music to her ears.

"Is there a special boy?"

"Not in my life."

"You're telling me that a pretty thing like you hasn't got an admirer?"

Pulling away she looked her father straight in the eyes.

"I never said that I didn't have admirers, I said that there's no-one special in my life."

"And why's that?"

"Because all the boys are immature goof balls."

"Lily!"

"Well they are daddy."

"So you think that your friends are immature goof balls?"

"What no?"

"But you just said all the boys are."

Lily rolled her lips together as if she were about to chew on them. She had never explained to her father the dynamic of her group of friends. He had met them before in better times but knew nothing of the troubles that they were each facing now.

"My friends have had to grow up."

It was a small statement that caused her father to study her closely.

"What haven't you told me?"

Lily closed her eyes and thought long and hard about so much that her father was unaware of. She wondered if he realised that she was living in a war. She wondered if he realised that so many of the wizarding people he had met had been killed. Where should she start?

"Dad remember when we stayed with Branwen in Wales that summer?"

"How can I forget? Those masked men just appeared in the house and attacked us."

Lily nodded. She remembered the attack that took place just before her fourth year as if it were yesterday. The way that Taliesin had slammed her father's body to the floor as Tad had grabbed Petunia into another room. She could still feel the push Branwen had given her that had led to a painful spell hitting the Welsh girl in the face. The terror of the speed of those spells and then the relief when Thomas Scott and Henry Potter had turned up.

"After the attack did they tell you what was happening?"

Dudley gave Lily a quizzical look.

"They told me that we'd been attacked by some wizards. Which for the record I'd realised myself."

Lily gave a soft little nod at that.

"Well there's more to the story than that. And I think that it will explain why I think my friends have grown up quickly."

"What is it?"

"Well first there are two of my friends that you haven't had the chance to meet. Joseph Wild and Frank Longbottom. A few weeks before that attack on us Joe's father was murdered. He was a worker in the Ministry in charge of a very important department. His murder has never been solved but we all know that it was done by the same group that attacked us."

"Lily –"

"Dad the men that attacked us are called Death Eaters. They are followers of a wizard calling himself Voldemort."

Lily shivered as she said the name and her father seemed to notice.

"What's wrong?"

She looked her father straight in the eye.

"Not many people say his name. He's referred to as You-Know-Who in the wizarding world. So many people fear him and with good reason. Dad you know that I'm a muggleborn right."

Her father looked quizzical again but spoke in a manner which said he didn't quite understand but he knew enough to recognise the term.

"It means that your parents are not magical."

She nodded.

"There are three types of wizarding people; muggleborns like me are just one type. There are half-blood which are people who have a muggleborn for a parent, or grandparent or one wizarding parent and one muggle one. Then there are purebloods which have wizards in their family for several generations on both sides. There's not many of them left but they are regarded by some as the true wizarding people."

Dudley nodded as if understanding.

"You-Know-Who believes that the wizarding world should only be for the pure-blooded. He can tolerate a half-blood to a point but muggleborns he feels have stolen their magic. He's trying to kill all the muggleborns in the wizarding world."

"What? But you're a muggleborn."

Lily gave a swift nod.

"That is why the wizarding world has been at war since that summer we were attacked."

Her father stiffened.

"You're living through a war."

It was a statement that she knew unnerved him as well as so many others.

"Yes dad. And people are dying. This is why I think that my friends have had to grow up quickly. Do you remember Henry Potter? It was his house that we went to after the attack."

"Of course I do. He's a great man he sat and spoke to me for hours about little things in the wizarding world that I didn't understand. How is he doing? I don't ever get to see any of those wizards except for Taliesin and Dyfan."

"Dead. He died in the May nine months after you first met him. He was in Romania working with dragon trainers and somehow one of the dragons broke free and trampled him. At least that's the official statement. What really happened was a Death Eater set a dragon on him."

Dudley had gone silent. Lily though pressed on.

"Tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of the murder of Ginny Dunn and her entire family. You might remember Ginny. She was one of my friends, the one with the red hair."

"She's dead."

"Yes. She was murdered in her room by Alistair Dixon, Amanda's father. He's now in Azkaban prison for life for her murder and the murder of her parents. But he's also there for the murder of Thomas Scott, his wife Lora and son Aaron. They're of course my friend Alice's family. They were murdered last October in their home. And a few days before that my friend Joe his mother went missing. It's likely that she was taken by Death Eaters and killed. We'll never find her body."

"Lily stop this is horrible."

"And May just gone. Dad there was an attack in Hogsmeade village just outside of the school. I was there that day, we all were. Dyfan Ddraig was murdered and his body taken by the Death Eaters."

"LILY ENOUGH!"

She blinked a few times trying to calm herself down.

"That's why dad I think the boys in the school are immature. Yes some have lost family members but not on the same scale that we have. We're a family. When one of us hurts we all do. Dyfan was everyone's Tad and we all lost him. Ginny was a friend to all of us and we lost her. People are dying and it's scary. But I've got my friends and we're looking out for one another."

"Maybe you should stay with me after all."

Lily gave her father a soft kiss on the cheek.

"We both know that I belong in that world. Besides if I don't go back you'll end up with James Potter camped out on the doorstep."

"And why's that?"

"He's my number one admirer."

Lily laughed. She was use to laughing through the sadness of the world. But the gleam in her father's eyes made her certain that he was facing yet another problem.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The wind whistled gently through the trees as the sun began to fade away. It wouldn't be long until the day died and the night born. Stars would soon be twinkling and the large moon only a week from its fullest would provide light.

Branwen pulled her knees up under her chin. She had spent three hours sat in the graveyard now. This hadn't been the plan. She was suppose to be celebrating the wedding of Augusta Longbottom to Victor Cooper. She had picked out a set of chocolate brown dress robes especially for the occasion. She'd had her hair cut and had even made sure that her nails were clean. She had been looking forward to spending one more day with Joe before returning to Hogwarts.

Joe was someone who was playing on her mind of late. She kept remembering her final conversation with Tad over and over in her mind. They had discussed Quidditch, Hogwarts and her date with Kyle Simmons. That had been a wasted date. Kyle had turned out to be pathetic. When the attack had started he had hidden away. Branwen didn't want to be with someone who would hide from trouble. She wanted someone who would face trouble straight on. So she had decided whilst running towards the village Kyle was over with before they even began.

But Tad had known she and Kyle wouldn't work. He had said as much when he had been surprised by her choice. She had always been open with Tad and he had known about the five boys she had dated in Hogwarts. Starting with Peter and ending with Kyle. But she had been surprised when he had assumed that it would be Joe.

She couldn't help but remember his response to her puzzlement…

"_Young people today. They don't see what is right under their own noses."_

She hadn't understood it then. But now … maybe she did. She hadn't meant to kiss Joe that first time in Hogwarts. That had been a mistake. A comfort maybe. He had understood her feeling of loss over her Tad and not having a body to bury. But what was her excuse for the train station? Maybe it was the fact that she had only meant to hug him. That he had turned his body and their lips had met. She hadn't meant that kiss at the time. But then the ones after that. She had no excuse for those kisses.

But it felt good to be in his arms. She felt safe as if the world outside didn't exist it was just the two of them. But that didn't matter really. No she was returning to Hogwarts in the morning and Joe was now a presenter on the WWN. He had the whole world at his feet. He could date any girl that he wanted. Why would he settle for a Hogwarts student that he would never get to see?

Branwen felt the tears shift in her eyes. She blamed her location. She always cried when she came here. She traced the lettering on the stone in front of her.

_Gwenhwyfar_

_Bywiog ymlaen yn traddodiad_

She knew that her father had chosen the statement after her death. 'Live on in legend'. It was a tiny sentence that spoke depths. Branwen had heard the legend of her mother so many times. How she married Arthur of Camelot, fell in love with Lancelot was kidnapped by Arthur's son and nephew Medrawd and then following the death of Arthur spent the rest of her life in a nunnery.

It was a very common legend that was told in muggle primary schools throughout Wales. It had always made her smile to think that she had a connection to this story. That her mother had brought Arthur the roundtable in her dowry. That she had found love with Lancelot only to be betrayed by him. But the best part was that she had known the rest of the story. She had known that the story hadn't ended there. That Gwenhwyfar meet Myrddin and travelled to different times with him.

"You look just like her."

Branwen turned and studied her father.

"I doubt that."

"But you do."

She smiled at the man

"I have your nose, the same shape eyes as you and my hair is the exact shade and at the moment same length as yours."

Branwen wasn't exaggerating. Since Tad's death her nhad had fallen behind on taking care of himself. His brown hair sat at his shoulders in waves that did nothing for him. She was surprised though when he smiled.

"You have her smile and your eyes light up in the same way that hers did, they're the same colour you know. She had this pale skin that you've got and the same splattering of freckles over her nose."

Branwen stood up and looked at her father closely.

"I guess I'm the best bits of the both of you."

He nodded looking at the grave.

"One day I'm going to be buried here with Gwyn. Just like nhad planned to be buried with mam. Pity neither of them are here."

Five graves over stood the empty lot with the marble stone erected above it. Branwen had stood over it for two hours next to her father. She had memorised the wording.

_Rhiannon Ddraig_

_Anwylyd a colli_

_Dyfan Ddraig_

_Brwydrwr, athro a ffrind_

It had broken her heart to stand and look at the inscription. She had wanted so much more to be said about Tad. She had wanted the world to know that he had been a loved father and grandfather. That he had been caring for all those around. That he had made a difference in so many lives. But her father had been right. Simple was better. It didn't matter if the world knew or not. All that mattered was that they knew. That was just and right.

The sun was almost gone and Branwen looked at her father.

"Nhad should we go now?"

"Do you know your mothers history?"

Branwen gave her father a brief smile.

"Of course. Arthur, Camelot, Lancelot. It's all romantic but the best part was when she met you."

He smiled at her but shook his head.

"What about before Arthur?"

Branwen gave a little shrug. The truth was that she didn't know anything before that part of her mother's life. It was something that wasn't mentioned. All people cared about was Arthur and that legend. That was where her mother came into it, not before.

"Gwenhwyfar was the only daughter of Gogrfran. Do you know who that is?"

"Should I?"

"Gogrfran was the King of the giants. He's their most famous King and all the giants respect him even today. His linage was the most powerful. His son inherited the throne after his death but that line run out two centuries ago."

"My mother was a giant!"

Branwen didn't know what to think or how to react. That had never been part of the lore.

"She was a witch. King Gogrfran was a smart giant who realised that when she didn't grow to the full height of a giant. She was tall for a woman reaching six feet but that is very small for giants. He married her to Arthur to save her. You see giants are fearful of magic and they were scared of her. They would have killed her in a heartbeat."

"Why are you telling me this then?"

"Because you are the rightful heir to Gogrfran's line. He is your grandfather when all is said and done. That makes you the Queen of the giants. This is something that Tad didn't want you to ever find out. But you need to know Branwen. You need to understand because Voldemort knows. He has the giants on his side but he knows that if you chose to you would have command of them. The giants still fear magic but two hundred years on they still miss the Gogrfran line. They have stories about Gwynhwyfar hell there is one alive who still remembers her. They would bow to your command. But Voldemort needs them to serve him. He will try to either kill you, or to use you to aid him with the giants."

"Nhad –"

"Your Tad didn't want you to mess around in the business of giants Branwen. I didn't agree but I respected him enough to leave it alone. But now he's gone and I think you're old enough to come to your own conclusions. I won't tell you what to do. You need to consider everything. Because while they would do as you command they would fear you for your magic. Some would even appose you because they'd want to rule. Don't make any decision in haste."

"Now there's something I want to show you."

His voice was even as he took her hand. Branwen's mind though was in a loop. The Queen of the giants. She had to push that thought aside to be able to think straight. Silently they walked passed Tad's marker and down two rows. There stood a simple grave with a simple marker.

_Karen Arianrhod_

_Merch ap Cymru _

"How much of the family history did Tad tell you Branwen?"

"His father died fighting a wizard who was tormenting muggles. His mother died in an attack in Diagon Alley. His sister was murdered in her own home and mam died giving birth to me."

Branwen watched as her father nodded gently.

"My Tad, Llewellyn Ddraig is buried two rows up from nhad. With him is mamgu Ceridwen. But this grave here is Aunt Karen's."

"Aunt?"

"This is the grave of Karen Arianrhod Ddraig, or by her married name Dumbledore."

Branwen felt gobsmacked.

"Wait do you mean that Albus Dumbledore married Tad's sister?"

"Yes Caried. And this is her grave, and the grave of their unborn child."

Branwen fell silent.

"We're all that's left of the Ddraig family now. You need to know the graves so that you can tend to them. Nhad has taken care of them all for years. Now it's our job."

"Yes nhad."

* * *

Okay translations:

**Rhiannon - beloved and missed **

**Dyfan – fighter, teacher and friend**

**Karen – daughter of Wales**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The train was filled with all the usual laughter and yet it seemed oddly quiet in the one compartment. Sirius was sat next to the window watching as the scenery passed them by. They had been on the train for three hours already. The usual joyful excitement of another year in the school seemed to have evaporated from them.

Only three other people sat in the compartment with him, which was an odd occurrence in itself. Peter was reading a Quidditch magazine opposite him. His head was rested against the head rest as he flipped through the pages. The boy had been quiet for the entire ride. Sirius knew that Peter as still adjusting to life without a father. There had been no news about Simon since the trial back in January. And it seemed certain to Sirius that there never would be again.

Sitting next to Peter looking through an Astronomy book was Alice. Like the other boy she seemed lost in thought. Sirius wondered if she was even concentrating because she hadn't turned a page in about an hour. He wondered if maybe her mind was lost on Frank. This was the first year that he wouldn't be at Hogwarts and Alice had come to depend on her boyfriend.

Sirius sat there looking at the girl. Did relationship last outside of the school? He was ignorant to the idea that they could. Sure he knew married people who were happy together, such as Andi and Ted Tonks. They were married and now raising the child that had been hidden away from the world for so long. But they had been in the same year. It must be different when one finishes before the other.

He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. The last person in the compartment was his own girlfriend Amanda. She was curled up on the other end of the seat to him. Her head was rested against the window of the door and she seemed content to stare out into space. He knew what was going through her mind. It was the thing that had kept her up the night before. He had listened to her crying in her own room. Finally he had given up on the idea of sleep and crawled into her bed holding her close as she cried.

It was understandable to him that she would cry today. It was after all the first anniversary. The idea that only a year ago they had all been on the train laughing and joking seemed unreal. They had been excited about the year to come never imagining that there would be so much death. Amanda missed Ginny he realised that. He had never understood how much she relied on the other girl. But as Amanda had once put it Ginny had been her version of James. And Sirius for the life of him couldn't imagine not having James around.

James Potter, Head boy. Sirius mentally laughed at that. He couldn't work out how that had come about. Was Dumbledore crazy? That was why he wasn't in the compartment and Remus too was missing considering the fact that he was still a prefect and in the meeting. Sirius had learnt only three hours ago that Lily was Head Girl. That made more sense to him. She was responsible, bright, well liked and most important well behaved. And since she was now Head a new Gryffindor seventh year prefect had to be selected and that had been Branwen.

That was why there were only four of them. It was strange to think that their group had shrunk to eight. It had always been a nine, and then it had become a ten before an eleven. But Joe along with Frank had finished his seven years. It was almost like they had been released from Azkaban for a crime. They had served their seven years imprisoned away from the world. And he still had another year ahead of him.

It was the strangest feeling to realise that this was the last time he would be doing this. Next September first he wouldn't be on a train travelling north. He would be out there. Doing what though? He had been thinking long and hard about that. He had watched the decisions that his two older friends had made.

Frank had gone for a ministry job. A job that was well respected and would more than likely have an important impact on the years that were ahead of them. Sirius was certain that when he left Hogwarts he would chose to stand up and fight against Voldemort but as an Auror… He was proud that his friend had achieved his ambition to get onto the training programme, but Sirius couldn't see himself settled in that job.

Then there was the path Joe had chosen. He wanted to entertain, wanted to get people smiling again. It was something that Sirius totally understood. He loved nothing more than a joke and a laugh. But to be a reporter for the radio was something that would terrify him. He didn't mind everybody watching him while he flew around a Quidditch pitch but to have people listening to his voice and taking everything he said for granted. He didn't think he'd want that responsibility.

To be honest he hadn't really thought through what would happen when he left Hogwarts. All he was certain of was that he wouldn't be saying goodbye to his friends. They had become his family. This was it for him. They would be part of his life until he died. He couldn't imagine it any other way.

He blinked several times and looked around. He was more sure now that Alice wasn't reading the book and it seemed as if Peter was just flicking around the pages. Amanda was still staring ahead of her and nobody spoke. It felt wrong.

"I can't take much more of this!"

"Of what?"

Peter hadn't looked up as he spoke.

"The silence. Somebody say something."

"Something."

Alice spoke in a steady voice which made Peter start to laugh. His laugher seemed to trigger something and Alice began to chuckle. Sirius was grinning by the time they had regained control. Only Amanda hadn't moved. Her eyes were glazed and Sirius was sure that she was far away lost in her own mind.

"So how'd he do it then?"

Peter shut his magazine and looked at Sirius.

"Who do what?"

"James become Head of course."

Sirius shrugged his shoulders.

"I've got no idea. It doesn't seem right though does it?"

"Do you think Dumbledore was having a mad moment or something?"

"Possibly. I mean it is James."

"You mean one of the smartest students in our year group. Someone who has proven that he can be relied upon in an emergency. A guy who is liked by most of the student body and respected for the way he handles himself when faced with some of the most devastating occurrences so far in the war."

Sirius looked at Alice. He knew that has face showed disbelief in what she had said. But she was laughing again with a wide smile on her face.

"I'm sorry guys but James showed himself to be mature and reliable during the attack in Hogsmeade and in its aftermath."

Sirius shook his head quickly.

"But he has two thousand five hundred and seventy two detentions under his belt."

"It's sad that you know that Sirius!"

He gave Alice a cheery smile.

"Twenty two less than me."

"Well now we know why you're not Head boy!"

Alice was laughing as she said it and Sirius felt relieved by that. He knew that the two of them had had a lot of detentions. But it was mainly due to Malfoy in her reign. She had taken pranks they had pulled against Slytherins as personal attacks and they had spent the first three years having at least two detentions a week, if not more.

"Alice I understand the whole James is responsible theory. But Sirius is right as well. James is the guy that pulls pranks and gets detentions. I mean Lily has had what seven detentions in six years if that. So of course she's Head girl.

They fell silent again. It came down really to the fact that Dumbledore had decided James and they couldn't understand that. Then Alice spoke softly.

"Maybe we need a laugh every now and again. Things are bad out there and sometimes we just need the mood to be lightened and James is good at that. There's never any malice in his pranks and usually everyone including the victim of them ends up laughing. Maybe Dumbledore thinks he's got a balance between responsibility and fun."

"Anything off the cart lovelies?"

The conversation broke off as the three friends bought snacks to get them through the rest of the train ride. Sirius bought more than he wanted to share with Amanda. But she still hadn't moved. And as the other three started on a game of Exploding Snap there wasn't a hint that she would be moving any time soon.

* * *

Hello there.

I'm sorry for the delay with posting. I've had a very hectic week. But I hope this makes up for things. I know not much happened but I like the idea of seeing how Sirius' mind is working and I felt that they needed to talk about why James would be head boy. And I like it.

Anyway there might be a post at the end of this week, otherwise next Tuesday. I promise

Kris xx


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Remus the meetings over."

He could feel somebody shaking his shoulder. Looking up he saw James' long nose pointed at him. He gave his friend a shove but didn't move from his seat. The prefect compartment had pretty much emptied as the others had gone on their rounds.

It was a strange feeling being in there. Remus had been a prefect for the last two years and had become use to this compartment. But it had always been somebody older than him leading the meetings. Sure his first year it had been Andi, who he had known, and the last year it had been Frank his friend. But this year it seemed strange. Lily and James in charge.

He looked and found that Lily was sat in a corner with Branwen. The girl didn't look like she belonged in the room. He wasn't being mean she just sat there with her shoulders hunched. He wondered if she was worried about returning to the school. He knew that her father had taken up his position as Defence professor again. But it would be strange being so close to the place where she had lost Tad.

For him it was the fact that it was a year. A year since he had seen her smile, since the sparkle in her eyes had been directed at him. He hadn't felt her arms or her kisses in what felt like a lifetime and her laughter was like a distant dream. He hated to think that the year had almost defeated him. The thought of returning to the place where he had almost lost himself scared him.

"Okay I was hoping for a few laughs before we got to Hogwarts but it seems that's out of the question."

"You should go find the others."

"And leave you to sit here thinking about how upset you are over today. No. Come on Remus it's not all that bad."

He picked his head up and looked at his friend.

"Do you even remember what today is?"

"The anniversary of the beginning of the end. Of course I remember what today is Remus. I've never been as scared as I was a year ago."

"It was horrible wasn't it?"

The boy simply nodded as he sat down next to him. Remus' mind drifted to that night. He had been tucked up in bed in the middle of a decent sort of dream that he couldn't remember now. Then the door had opened and there had been shouting. Alice was yelling something about Amanda.

Remus hadn't understood he had swung his head out from behind the curtains in time to see Sirius push passed Alice and run down the stairs yelling that he was coming. In the moment it had been rather comical. But as Remus saw how white the girl was he had panicked.

With James and Peter by his side he had ran down to the common room. He had watched as James and Alice had gone into the room that Frank and Joe had shared with the other seventh years. Then they were in the common room.

It was almost as though it were yesterday. He remembered how Peter had just dropped down on the sofa and fallen instantly back asleep. Frank and Joe had emerged with James and Alice and both had dropped down next to Peter and their eyes too had closed.

Sirius had already been pacing the entrance to the girl's dormitory. He had been swearing and muttering under his breath. Remus had understood that it was taking all of his control not to run at the stairs. James was with him in seconds and they paced in opposite directions almost like expectant fathers unable to enter the labour room.

Alice had been trying her best to stop them from putting a foot on the bottom step. They all knew that it would turn into a slide and set alarms off. That was all they needed so late in the night. Was it passed midnight? Had it happened on the second and not the first? No it had been almost midnight. Everyone had gone to bed after the feast readying themselves for the next day.

Remus had been stood a little back from his two friends. He knew that he had been smiling or something at the way that Alice had been trying not to touch their bare skin. He hadn't realised that the smile would be wiped off his face within seconds.

Then Amanda and Alice were on the floor in front of them. He didn't know how that had happened but when Sirius had scooped the brunette up into his arms the smile had wiped off his face. She was white, so white that she looked almost dead to him. Her body was shaking as she clung to Sirius and Remus felt sure that she had tears in her eyes even though he couldn't see them.

Then they were on the chairs and Branwen was there with Dumbledore and McGonagall, Pomfrey and even Tad! Then he had watched it, he had seen what had happened. His whole body had begun to shake when he had heard Ginny's voice. He had known something terrible had happened when his girlfriends form had appeared there in front of his eyes. He would never have imagined how bad it was.

And then smashing up the Headmasters office. He felt ashamed at that and yet he knew that he had needed to release that feeling somehow. He hated remembering what followed on from that. The funeral, the drinking, the violence that he had felt towards everyone. He knew that he wasn't recovered not yet. He still needed the support of his friends and today he needed it more than anything.

"I'm scared that I'll forget her."

A hand rested on his shoulder gently.

"Don't be stupid Remus. You won't forget her."

"I think I'm beginning too already."

His voice was almost none existent.

"I know it's hard. I think that way about dad sometimes. I can't remember the funny way he use to pronounce his u's anymore. Or the smell of his aftershave and shampoo. But then suddenly I'll hear someone say something and think that was the way dad did it. And I'll walk passed somebody and know that he's wearing the same scent that dad did. It all comes back in those moments."

Remus looked at his friend closely.

"And what about his face?"

"I see that in photos, in portraits and most importantly in my own reflection. I know he hasn't left me he's a part of me. And Remus I know that it's different for you. But Ginny is a part of you. She's in your heart and she'll never disappear."

"It scares me."

Remus lowered his head into his hands. James' hand rested on his shoulder and the two sat like that for the remainder of the train ride to Hogwarts.

* * *

So first off sorry I know I said I'd post in the week but I got a little distracted with some things over here. And I can't promise that there'll be post in the week because I'm likely going to get distracted again. So I can only say sorry over and over again.

To answer one thing. No they will not be constantly thinking about Ginny and this isn't the setting for the entire year. I wanted to show them returning to Hogwarts because its the last time it will happen. But that means that you also see the very first anniversary of Ginny's death. And its sad because its a year ago that their friend died. And for Amanda and Remus its the most raw on the day. But I think there's only one more chapter set on this date and then we'll be onto new things.

So I hope you enjoy

Kris xx


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Joe lowered his glass and rested his head on his hand. His head felt as if it were spinning. He was a light weight when it came to alcohol. He had never realised that before. But he wasn't a strong drinker and his brother's well they were.

Beside him Frank hiccupped. Joe could see that his eyes were a little clouded and it was a strange sight. The pair were sat in the Leaky Cauldron off Diagon Alley with Kyle, Anton, Gideon and Fabian. It hadn't been a planned meeting, but sometimes its better that way.

Frank and Joe had gone to King's Cross and waved their friends off to Hogwarts. It had been the strangest feeling not to climb up onto the train themselves. Joe had considered just jumping on board for a moment but then sense kicked in.

He was a man now. He wasn't a student and as he waved goodbye he had felt as though something inside him had died. Maybe he hadn't really accepted the fact that he was no longer a student. Maybe he hadn't realised that the train would leave without him on.

As he sat there he realised that as sad as he was Frank was worse. His girlfriend had returned to Hogwarts and left him in the real world. He wondered again not for the first time if relationships could work over a long distance. Alice and Frank would be surrounded by people, maybe something would happen which wasn't planned.

And what about the others? Joe knew that he would miss his friends while they were at school. He realised that he would miss the life of a student too. The fact that when he wasn't in lessons he was able to mix with his friends. He was able to roam around the best building in Britain. It was strange to think that that aspect of his life was truly over.

But as much as he knew he was going to miss Hogwarts he was looking forward to this new part of his life. For starters he now got to spend time with his brothers. With their age gap they had never been especially close. There were only two years between Anton and Kyle and as such they had been friends throughout their childhood. But with nine years between them and Joe it had been harder. But now finally they were on equal footings.

Then there was also the fact that as a man he was now a fully fledged member of a group known as the Order of the Phoenix. It had been a surprise to him that it even existed. Which wasn't a surprise thinking about it. The Order was a secret organisation set up outside of the ministry to deal with the threat of Voldemort. He loved the fact that they thought so much of him to invite him to join. It was even better that his brothers and Frank were involved.

The only other great thing was the fact he had a job that he already loved. He had started in July almost instantly after finishing Hogwarts. He did a lot of running around the studio fetching drinks for the presenters. But when one of them ran off to the toilet he was in charge of making sure the next song started without a problem. Then he had been offered tickets to a Quidditch game because the presenter had a wedding that day.

Sure he wasn't presenting anything yet, but it was only time. They loved his joke and his work ethic. He knew that it was only a matter of time and then he would be in. And he couldn't wait for that moment.

However with all the ups there was still one thing that weighed him down. It was worse than the knowledge that Hogwarts was over, it was the idea that the girl he liked would move on without him. Branwen Ddraig seemed to be etched on his brain. She seemed to rule his dreams of late and all he wanted to do was hold her and kiss her. He'd admit that he enjoyed those few times he had managed to get her alone. It just felt right to him. He could hit himself for not making a move before. They could have had months maybe even years of enjoyment in Hogwarts together. Now he was forced to admit that he had been too late.

A hiccup burst through his mind. He looked at the two red headed men sat at the table with him. This was another reason why he and Frank had made their way to the Cauldron that afternoon. They both knew that while alcohol wasn't the answer to any problem raising a glass to the memory of a friend was allowed.

The first of September had come around so quickly. The last year had been full of torment and troubles for them all. But it was strange now to think that it had really been a year. He remembered the night so well. The fear that had flown around them after the vision had been shown. How they had sat up in the sixth year boys dorm room all night. They hadn't slept and just watched as the girls cried. Joe had tried to understand why but he knew now that that didn't matter.

"You know Frank boy she was always the apple of mum's eye. Ginny could never do anything wrong as far as she was concerned. It was horrible!"

Fabian slammed his beer down onto the table.

"I remember she snuck into Molly's room when she was really young and spilt her perfume all over these fancy robes that she was wearing out for a date with Arthur. Molly of course got the blame for leaving it where Ginny could reach."

Fabian shook his head with laughter on his lips. Gideon though had his eyes closed.

"She wanted to be just like Molly that was the problem. She was so young and we were older. She wanted to be grown up like we were. She wanted to go to Hogwarts and wear makeup and have a boyfriend. She wanted to fit in."

Gideon gave a sniff.

"She was misbehaved but she felt she didn't fit in. I'd gladly go back to those days when she was a terror if it meant having her back again."

They fell silent for a while. Then Frank spoke up.

"You realise she never grew out of that right. She was always pulling pranks and misbehaving its just she got very good at not getting caught."

Fabian and Gideon gave a look but Joe smiled as he remembered something funny from his past.

"Frank's not lying. She gave antlers one time!"

The four men laughed as Frank turned red.

"She didn't mean too Joe!"

"No she was aiming at Remus."

The two youngest men laughed. Frank lowered his drink and looked closely at Joe.

"Remember when the boys tried to prank all the girls; it must have been what … their second year maybe. They had a major falling out over that and there was fighting between them all in the common room, and in the corridors and things. Anyway I think they put something in Ginny's make-up. I might be wrong but anyway she ended up with a blue face –"

Joe suddenly remembered that incident laughing he finished Franks sentence with him.

"And she turned Peter blue."

The pair of them laughed happily looking at the Prewett brothers and Joe's own brothers. Joe wiped his eyes gently.

"Your sister was no angel. She had a wicked sense of humour and enjoyed tormenting the people she was closest too with silly little pranks like that. But you know when it came down to it she really did care and she would do anything and everything for us all."

They all fell silent as they picked up their glasses. Frank seemed to lower his before anyone else.

"Alice told me that Ginny was the only person that Amanda confided in. When everything happened with her father Ginny was the one that she turned too and trusted. That's why they learnt that spell. Ginny wanted to know that if anything like that happened again she'd be able to help. I think that says everything about her."

"She was the best girl ever. I loved her because she was my sister but I was proud of her because she was a decent girl. Fabian and I talked about this loads. Ginny was a beautiful girl and girls like that tend to be conceded but not our Ginny."

He gave a massive smile as he picked his glass up again. Joe nodded at that.

"She was one of the most gorgeous girls I ever met. And I am able to say that I was her first proper boyfriend. Because Michael didn't count, the two timing git. And she did break my heart. But that smile, how could anybody ever stay mad at her? She was a good girl and there are not many girls like her. She's missed more than words can express and the wizarding world is a little less exciting without her."

Anton surprised Joe as he raised his glass up.

"May I recommend a toast to the lives of Alexander, Magnolia and Ginny? May their souls have found rest and enjoyment while we left here live everyday missing them in ways beyond any words."

"To the Dunn's."

The six men around that small table in the Leaky Cauldron raised their glasses high clinking them together. Those sitting around thought they were celebrating a good day, an engagement, a marriage, or maybe even a birth. Nobody there could imagine that they were remembering a night that would forever play on the minds of those that had known the family, and be a ghost that would haunt at least one person for another twenty years.

* * *

I just want to say thanks to **Binka** you are too kind

Kris xx


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The start of term feast passed in a buzz that made it feel unreal. The new students were seated and the food had been and gone before Amanda noticed where she was. Nothing had passed her lips in nearly twenty four hours. She knew that was a stupid thing to have happened but her hunger had evaporated away the day before and hadn't returned yet.

She watched through almost glazed eyes as the Headmaster made his way to the front of the small podium on which the professors table was situated. The noise of the hall which seemed suppressed in comparison to the previous years died away. All eyes went to the man and he stood looking around as if wondering how he had gotten there. It was a feeling that Amanda understood at the moment.

"So few smiling faces, yes this summer has been a difficult one for the wizarding world but Hogwarts remains as it always has. The forest is as always forbidden and allow me to emphasis that now. Quidditch tryouts for each house will take place within these first two weeks. Please check your house notice board for the date and give your name to the head of house."

"As most of you will have spotted Professor Ddraig has returned to the school this year. He will be retaking the position of Defence Against the Dark Arts. Speaking of Defence all students should note that extra protection spells have been placed around the gates of the school for our safety. Please take care not to try and climb the gates during the year otherwise you may find yourselves spending a great deal of time in the hospital wing."

There were a few chuckles that resounded through the hall and it was almost certainly from the first years. They would be the only ones not to realise the peril that had come so close to the school the previous spring. It had been broadcast over the wizarding wireless and in the prophet but eleven year olds don't tend to be known for their love of topical news, even during a war.

"Lastly and maybe most importantly over this summer we have taken into consideration what occurred last May and how it affects us all. We have come to the conclusion that Hogsmeade visits should be permanently postponed for the time being. That said dates will still go up on the notice boards and anybody over the age of seventeen who wishes to go into the town will be allowed on those dates. But I must stress that it will be at your own risk and only those aged seventeen and over will be allowed."

Amanda looked at the man closely as he stood in front of them. He was beginning to look old to her. She had only ever known him as an old man but he had always seemed surprisingly young despite his age. That seemed to have disappeared over the summer. She wondered if it was the loss of his friend that had done that to him. If maybe the war outside was beginning to strike closer to him as it was to her.

She was watching him so closely that she missed his dismissal. She was watching him so closely that she noticed the sparkle in his eyes had vanished. That the crow's feet on the edges of his eyes were more prominent than ever before and he looked tired and pale. It was a startling revelation.

A hand on her arm drew her attention. Sirius was stood there watching her. She noticed the concern in his eyes as he helped her up. What had she ever done to deserve Sirius? He had sat up last night with her when that old nightmare struck. It had been months since her dreams had shown her Ginny's last moments. And yet so close to the anniversary it had struck her again. He had been wonderful for her in those small hours when she had been so afraid. He had just held her and allowed her tears to fall. He hadn't spoken a word as he stroked her hair. She had clung to him as she had done on a night four years earlier.

She allowed him to direct her through the crowds and along corridors until they reached the portrait that hid the entrance to the common room. She watched as he spoke the words that made it move and they stepped inside. It was already packed with people gossiping and jumping around. Amanda could hear the first years little 'ohhs and ahhs' as they took in the details of the place they would be spending the next seven years in.

She remembered that feeling. That first look and wonderment that this place is real. That its existence wasn't something made up to keep her in line in her younger days. She was stood there looking at these amazing things that nobody else in her family had gotten to see. Sure she was missing out on the Slytherin experience, but the Gryffindor one was the better ride for her.

"You should try to get some sleep."

Amanda turned to look at the man holding her hands. His grey eyes were gazing deeply into hers. They were eyes that she knew she would get lost in, ones that she wanted to lose herself in now. But this wasn't the time or the place for such fancies.

"I don't think I'm going to get much tonight."

"Still you should try."

His left hand brushed loose strands off her left cheek. She tried to smile at him but she couldn't. God she loved this guy. She could just see them together for the rest of their lives and that excited her. But she couldn't say such things.

"I'll see you in the morning."

She reached up towards him and took his lips with her own. It was a soft and tender kiss that she had grown use to over the last five months. Her arms went around his neck as his snaked around her waist pulling her closer to him. The world around them seemed to fade away as she held him closely to her.

Finally she pulled back and gave him a soft smile. Turning she walked up the stairs to the girls dorm room. It was a walk that she could make with her eyes closed. As she reached the door though she felt her heart skip a beat. She had seen the sign above the door once read 'first years' and now it felt strange to see the words 'seventh years'. Had it really already been six years? Was this not a dream that she would awake from to discover that she was really about to take the first trip on the Express and that this was an illusion.

Stepping inside she realised that she was the first of the girls to reach the room this year. She wondered how long it would take the others to find their way to bed. But as she pulled on a vest top and sweat pants the thought was driven far from her mind. At the bottom of the trunk was the small bottle that John Warren had given to her a few days earlier. She knew what was in there and had fought against the urge to take it.

But as she closed her eyes facing the canopy she knew that she wouldn't sleep that night. She understood that this was going to be something that would haunt her through the long nights especially when the anniversary was close at hand. It wasn't just the fact that her friend had died at the hand of her father. It was the fact that the image was burned into her brain.

Gulping down the contents of the bottle she threw herself back onto the bed. Her eyes had dropped shut before her roommates had made their way up to the room. Her mind went blank as sleep washed over her.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

It was always surprising at how easily the students were able to slip into routine. After two months out of school they always thought that settling back in would be difficult. And yet that had never been their experience.

By the end of the first week the seventh years were once again in full swing. School work was piling up as the exams that would affect their entire futures sped closer. While they so easily made their way to classrooms and took notes two of their friends were experiencing very different Septembers.

Joseph Wild had happily settled into a life that involved living with his two elder brothers, drinking with them down the local pub, spending Sundays at the Cooper residence and evenings in a secret Order. He had even landed himself his dream job in the radio station. Sure he wasn't presenting yet but he was living his dream.

Frank Longbottom on the other hand was finding life outside of the school much harder. He had known that the path he was choosing was a difficult one that most people didn't make it onto, but he hadn't expected the twists and turns that came with it.

Frank had been use to having his mother to himself all his life. He knew that there had been a time when he had shared her but he couldn't remember that. His father was just a fragment of his memory. He wasn't naïve enough to believe that there hadn't been other people in their lives but nothing like Victor.

Victor Cooper was a man of integrity. Frank would happily admit that he liked the man. But for the first time he was now living with him. Before Frank had met him on occasions and then returned to school. It wasn't like that anymore. Victor was his step-father and had moved into the Longbottom home.

Did that mean it was now the Cooper home? Frank didn't know and nor did he care. The house had been left to his mother after his fathers death and it was hers to do as she wanted. He knew that it wouldn't be his home forever but for the time being it was. He had plans of his own.

He found though that half the problem for him was that he was missing the company of his friends, he was missing Quidditch and jokes. Hell he was even missing the arguments that made up such a large part of his friendship group. He was so use to being surrounded by them.

A new group of buddies were starting to form around him and he liked their companionship. Joe was of course still his right hand man. The pair seemed to be spending every evening together. Sometimes they'd go down one of the local pubs or to one of the homes and play chess. They would have home made dinners by Frank's mum when in the Longbottom house. And then some nights they would claim to be in the pub while at one of the Order meetings.

Around them though some new and not so new faces were appearing. Joe's oldest brother Kyle had taken to spending a lot of time with them. Although he was ten years older than them he meshed with them. He had broken up with a long term girlfriend a few weeks earlier and was finding it difficult.

Then there was Anton, eight years their senior. He acted as though he was still a teenager and whenever he was with them it was nothing but fun. The attention that was flung on the Quidditch player was like nothing Frank had ever experienced before and it was sometimes funny to see the lengths that the girls would go to get his attention.

Frank found that along with the two other Wild boys they were joined by the Prewett brothers. Frank hadn't known them before joining the Order of the Phoenix and was rather startled when he first realised their relationship to Ginny. He had known that she had brothers but he had never met them. He must have seen them at the funeral but his attention had been elsewhere. But knowing them now he saw the connection. The same light-hearted nature that Ginny had and the passion for a good laugh.

The last of his new buddies was a man he had come to know through Amanda during the summer. John Warren was also a Phoenix man and more subtle than the others Frank drank with. But there was something about him. Frank could see why Amanda had been drawn to him. And having the boys around him was a really big help. But there was one thing that it didn't help him with.

He was missing Alice. That was what was making things difficult. He was practically writing to her everyday just because she was constantly on his mind. In six years he had never been away from her for this long. Even during the break up he saw her daily. This was difficult. He felt almost as if he were losing her just because he couldn't hold her everyday.

And if that wasn't difficult enough the training had started in the ministry for his Auror position. He had known that it was going to be difficult. Only the best got to be an Auror. He had not expected though to return home so tired within the first few weeks. He had expected an easy introduction into the world. That wasn't the case.

It took three years to be a fully trained Auror and yet he knew that by Christmas he would be doing some of the work. He was being shown the basics at the moment. Paper work, how to hold a captive, transferring captives to Azkaban and back to the ministry for trials. This would be his work in the coming months. Important jobs that they couldn't spare the more senior department members for. They were after all at war.

As well as this though he was also in training. He was still after all a student. This time though he was learning the tools he'd need to survive as an Auror. He had already passed a number of tests thrown at him. He had taken the character and aptitude tests and been deemed worthy, his past held nothing to prevent him. It was just the subject matters.

He was finding the basics for concealment difficult. It was fine if you had an invisibility cloak but trying to get the spell right to blend into the background was difficult. Yet he knew that was one of the easier forms of concealment that he needed to master. If he didn't get that right there would be no way that they would allow him to try and disguise himself using magic.

Then there was the idea of stealth and tracking. Apparently he had an advantage for tracking in the fact that he had played seeker. He didn't get that connection personally. One of the older Aurors had informed him it was about not giving up on the goal. But it was harder than he had imagined, and stealth. He had never needed to be sneaky when moving around and he was finding it difficult. He was trying it out at home without much success.

But it wasn't all bad news. He had impressed Moody at the battle in May. He had proven his ability to think on his feet and fight. He had a good range of defensive spells and counter-curses and his essay on the importance of restraining magical law-breakers without attracting muggle attention had apparently been one of the best in recent memory.

Frank was proud of what he was doing but still it felt strange knowing that this year his routine wasn't as easy to slip into. That he wasn't wandering to the same classrooms as before and that Quidditch was for him a thing of the past. Yes life moved on and for Frank it was tough.

* * *

I'm so very sorry I wish I had a good excuse as to why I haven't posted sooner but I really haven't got one. Just so much has happened lately that I've found it difficult to find two minutes for this. I wish I could promise that the next post will be soon but I can't really do that. But I do promise it will be up as soon as I get the chance. Thanks for stucking with me.

Kris xx


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Joe's insides were knotted so tightly that he felt that if he so much as swallowed he'd be sick. His hands were shaking so badly that his wand was wobbling in his hand. This was big, bigger than anything he had seen before. How had he ended up in this position?

"Wild you ready for this?"

His eyes widened as he looked sideways at Lucian Betesh. The man laughed lightly slapping Joe on the back in a friendly manner.

"Don't worry too much. Just pretend that you're talking to me and you'll do fine."

Talking to him! That wasn't going to work. Joe closed his eyes and tried to clear his head. He could do this. He'd been doing it for six years. This was just another Quidditch match. He would comment as though it were Gryffindor out there trying to get the points they needed for the Cup.

Who was he kidding? This was nothing like that. This was for the WWN. Why did Pippa Grainge have to be sick? Did she not understand that she was the commenter for Quidditch for a reason? She had been one of the Harpies best players in the last decade. She had retired to start a family and now she was the voice of Saturday Quidditch.

"Wild we go live in five, four, three, two …"

He just had time to gulp in some air as he started.

"Good afternoon everybody and thanks for tuning into the WWN's Quidditch commentary. My name is Joseph Wild and I'll be taking you through the game today. The weather conditions are perfect for the match that is about to take place here in Ilkley Moor. The wind is low and the cloud cover will prevent the sun dazzling the players."

"The first team out today are the Falmouth Falcons. They are led by Seeker and Captain Charles Hertz. The rest of the team looks as follows, Dan Griffin and Andrew Robson as beaters, Barry Anderson as keeper and John Clower, Peter Miller and Donny Pullman as chasers. Among those on the sub-bench today we have Steve Trawich, Seth Morrison and Clive Fried."

Joe watched as the seven players in grey robes took to the air. He felt a smile come to his face as they took a lap to all the cheers that rounded the stadium. Joe wondered if Pullman was feeling as nervous as he was. After all this was his first game for the Falcons. He had been signed up at the end of term and drafted straight into the first team. Joe had always thought the guy had potential.

"And here come the Holyhead Harpies. Their captain and beater Sasha Perry is first on the pitch followed by fellow beater Linda Buckle. Keeper Maxine Morales isn't far behind along with the seeker April Storm and chasers Rosalie Siegel, Kathy White and Annett Winters. Today's subs for the Harpies include Sophia Brown, Charlotte Shepard and Mary Ford."

He watched with a smile on his face as the girls circled to the cheers. He picked Kathy out of the others easily. Her dark green robes billowed around her. It felt strange to see her not in the red that he remembered. But then as his mind quickly told him this wasn't Hogwarts anymore.

The whistle sounded and the game started. Joe laughed happily as he adjusted his eyes to the speed of the game. He commented quickly on how much quicker the players were than he was use to. Then he was off chatting…

***

"And Pullman sinks the Quaffle through the centre hoop and the Falcon fans go mad!"

He allowed the cheering to wash over him as he grinned laughing happily again.

"Donny Pullman is the newest recruit to the Falcon's team and is certainly a player to watch. I've been saying that for six years! In his first game since leaving Hogwarts he's already scored twelve of the goals. I think it's safe to say that Pullman's going to get some female attention after this one."

"But the Harpies aren't letting this get them down. White has the ball and is off down the pitch. Look at her go! Wow! This girl just keeps getting better and better, she was a force to reckon with in Hogwarts and now she's even faster! I wouldn't like to be Anderson when she throws that ball at the hoops. She's got a lot of force behind her."

He watched as the ball hit Anderson's left arm. He twisted round but seemed unable to catch the ball.

"And it's a goal for the Harpies! This game looks like it could go either way. It's going to be all down to the Seekers!"

Joe laughed as the game continued. Somewhere deep down he couldn't believe that he had been so worried about all this. Quidditch was Quidditch and he could talk about it forever.

***

The game had finished with a narrow victory for the Falcons. Joe was pumped up and ready to go meet Frank and the boys for a couple of drinks. He needed to get out and talk about the game some more. He needed to jump up and shout about how he had always said Pullman would be a fantastic find for somebody. He wanted to rub Anton up the wrong way considering that the Arrows had lost their match the day before.

What Joe didn't want was to spend hours back in the station. But he was required to report back there after the game. He stepped into the office and looked around. Jasper Day was in the studio with his show and he turned giving Joe a thumbs up as he passed the glass window. Joe nodded back as he went to the station manager's door.

Nigel had the door open looking out onto the floor. His eyes were on Joe as he walked up.

"Close the door behind you."

Joe did as he was told and stood behind a seat on his side of the desk.

"Sit down please."

Gulping Joe did as he was told. This had been his test he knew that. He was about to find out if he was any good at the job. If he was then he might get to present an occasional piece or possibly a late show. If he wasn't he'd be forced to wait forever for a second chance.

"It sounded like a good game."

Joe nodded.

"Yes Sir. I've seen a fair few but this one had so much. It really could have gone either way. It's been a while since that's happened in the league."

"You've seen that new Falcon Pullman play before?"

"He was on the Hufflepuff team. He's been their star player for years and their captain."

"And you know that chaser for the Harpies."

"I haven't seen her in a few years but we were in the same house. She played on the same team as four of my friends."

"Both good players."

"Yes Sir."

"And of course there's your brother."

Joe pulled a face but gave a little nod.

"You know a lot about Quidditch."

"Yes Sir. My brother has always been Quidditch mad and it's rubbed off I suppose. And five of my friends played for Gryffindor in school, four still do really."

"But it sounded like you've commentated before."

"I did it at Hogwarts."

Nigel nodded slowly. Joe couldn't help wondering what was going on. He watched as Nigel started to smile gently.

"We've been considering appointing a second commentator for a while. Everyone loves Pippa and she knows a lot but a survey on our viewers suggests that they want to hear a male prospective on the game too."

"Sir?"

Joe could feel the knot between his eyebrows as he tried to follow what was being said.

"How would you like to be a co-commentator with Pippa on the games?"

Joe couldn't help but smile as he thought about the look on his brothers' faces when he told them about this. He stuck his hand out completely happy with the offer in front of him.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

While Joe was sat in Ilkley Moor watching the Falcons take on the Harpies another Quidditch match was taking place in Hogwarts. James was on his broom in the air above the stadium watching as below him a number of hopefuls tried to catch his team members up.

For six years he had been on the team and had watched as new members were picked. He had realised early on that it was important that everyone had a say. They needed somebody that everyone could get along with. He remembered back to his fifth year when Branwen had joined and the trouble that had been caused because of a riff.

But he had also learnt that just because someone had been on the team one year it didn't mean they would be on it the next. Gryffindor had been lucky. They had always had a strong team and each year when the captain held 'tryouts' the existing team members out shone them. It seemed that the only player certain of a place was the captain.

James smiled at that thought. He had been on the team since his second year and now in his final he was the captain. He felt rather smug by that thought although he had been surprised when he had received the letter. Yes his Hogwarts letter had been a real eye opener this year!

First thing he had noticed was the Head Boy badge and then the Captain one. He knew which one he was most proud of but it wasn't the same as his mother. Being the Head Boy was an honour but also a little embarrassing. He was James Potter one of the biggest pranksters in the school how was he suppose to have authority? But it had its advantages.

James grinned knowing that Lily was impressed with his appointment. It showed him in a more mature light to her. He was trying to be that mature person too. He wanted to show her that there was more than just good looks and humour to him. He personally thought that maybe he was starting to win her over. But he'd have to wait to see.

The boys however were less impressed. He knew that they wondered if Dumbledore had had a mad moment. Honestly James had wondered the same thing. But Alice was sure that it had something to do with his part in what had happened in May. He though didn't think that could be the reason. Yes he had been responsible and had helped in the aftermath, but so had other people.

Besides his past had to influence the decisions. He was a prankster, he messed around, and he caused problems! Why would anybody make him Head boy? Sirius' point about his detentions also made James wonder. He had served a whooping two thousand five hundred and seventy two detentions in his six years in Hogwarts. Didn't that show he wasn't the right person?

James really couldn't wrap his head around it all. But while most of his friends seemed to argue over the reasons behind it he found that he liked only one that had been put forward. He remembered a conversation from the first night back in Hogwarts and the small smile on Alice's face as she had spoken.

"_Maybe we need a laugh every now and again. Things are bad out there and sometimes we just need the mood to be lightened and James you're good at that. There's never any malice in your pranks and usually everyone including the victim of them ends up laughing. Maybe Dumbledore thinks you've got a balance between responsibility and fun."_

A balance, he liked the sound of that. So James was settling into the idea of being Head Boy. He got taunted by his friends, had looks of pure hatred from the Slytherins but he didn't care.

But although people questioned his appointment there they didn't seem to think twice about him being Quidditch captain. It was that position that had excited him the most. He loved Quidditch it was something that was built into him. And for Professor McGonagall to trust him in charge of her team was beyond words.

He had felt a little guilty though when he realised that his appointment meant that neither Sirius nor Amanda held the position. The three of them were now the longest serving players on the team. They had seen Thomas Christian, Kathy White, Ted Tonks and Frank Longbottom all leave the team and head into the real world. They had watched as Jaclyn Owen, Katherine Wood and Branwen Ddraig had been appointed to the team. And now it was his decision on whether the two would get to play on their last year.

He looked back down as the players zoomed around in tight circles. Really he wanted to make as few changes as possible to the team. But he knew that he needed to try them all out because the house had almost had fits the year before when Frank had refused to allow any tryouts. Admittedly their team was complete on the first of September the year before, but then Amanda had had her 'accident.' The house thought that she should have been replaced but Frank held out.

They had of course lost the Cup and he had heard a number of mummers that certain people had been sure that they would have done a better job. Amanda had been an easy target for them last year. This year was different though. He laughed as she lapped most of the other fliers. He could tell that she was smiling as she leaned further forward hoping to lap the rest of the team.

James wasn't surprised as he put his attention back to the fliers that people were so spread out. Amanda was clearly in the lead with Katherine Wood only a little behind her. Branwen and Jaclyn were next with Sirius only a little bit further behind. James laughed at the fact that the girls were out pacing Sirius. But Sirius wasn't the fastest flier over distance; no he was quick at darting and catching small movements.

James blew his whistle and watched as everyone came to a stop mid-air. He lowered himself so that he was on a level with them all. He grinned as he looked around.

"Okay that was good. So now we're going to take up a small exercise. I'm going to split everyone up into groups of five –"

He watched as his team mates moved closer together and smiled a bit wider.

"And we'll attempt basic passes and catches. With each pass I want the circle to widen so the space becomes bigger."

As James finished he watched as Jaclyn Owen dived down towards the ground. Within seconds she was back with a Quaffle. James hadn't even selected the groups before the team were already involved in the practice. He watched as they joked and laughed happily tossing the ball towards each other. He made a sigh and was about to turn when he saw the ball sail towards him. He reached out quickly grabbing it. His eyes moved to see who had thrown it. Amanda was grinning.

"Just checking that your reflexes are still up for a position on the team."

He tossed the ball hard and watched as she easily caught it. As they continued James moved among the others setting them up and watching them attempt to catch the Quaffle. He noted that some had potential but they were nowhere near the level he wanted.

After a few minutes he blew his whistle and indicated everyone towards the ground. As they landed he looked around at all the faces.

"Okay so I'm going to split this up now then. Can those wanting to tryout for keeper please stay on the pitch everyone else into the stands."

***

It was a long three hours of tryouts. James rested his head against the wall as the warm water washed over him. He had sent everyone back to the common room as he headed to wash the mud out of his hair. A third year chaser hopeful had somehow managed to knock him from his broom towards the ground. Of course Amanda and Jaclyn had dived and grabbed him, but the pair had happily allowed his hair to fall into the mud before they straightened him back up.

Running his fingers through his hair he thought about what he had witnessed. He was perfectly happy not to drop any of the older players from the team. They had been the strongest in their fields, plus they worked well as a team. He would go up and tell them straight away. Then they could discuss a new seeker.

He turned the tap off and wrapped a towel around his middle. Rumpling his dark hair he stepped into the changing rooms towards the bench where he had left his clothes. His glasses were on top of his clothes and as he walked towards them he could make out dark shadows. He felt Goosebumps on his arms. He really needed to put his glasses closer to the shower, but then they always steamed up.

He quickly reached out and grabbed them shoving them on his nose. He felt a blush flush up his face as he looked around. His team were sat around on the benches waiting for him to finish. He noticed how the two younger girls were a little red too as they looked at their feet.

His friends though didn't look like a little thing like nudity bothered them. Branwen was happily reading a magazine as she waited for him, looking completely unaware of the fact he was there. Sirius had his face nuzzled against Amanda's neck and he could hear the small kisses he was placing on her skin. Meanwhile the girl was happily running her fingers through his hair as she giggled in a rather girly manner making her sound alien.

James was rather startled when he heard Branwen's voice.

"Any chance you'll hurry up and dress yet James. I think you're embarrassing Kat and Jackie."

Her eyes hadn't moved from the magazine. James shook his head and he reached out for his clothes. He headed out of view and quickly threw them on. As he moved back to see them he noted that Sirius and Amanda had pulled apart and that Branwen's magazine was away. They were all looking towards him.

"You could have waited until I got back to the common room."

Sirius barked a laugh.

"And have all those hopefuls watching. This is the best way mate, honestly."

"Your shirt is backwards."

He turned to Amanda and saw her pointing at something. He sighed as he saw the tag under his chin. Pulling it back from his head he turned it and put it back on. He heard the giggles from Kat and Jackie and shot them a look. They both blushed again. Girls!

"Okay so let's start then James. Did we make the team?"

He smiled at Branwen and nodded.

"Of course. Now a new seeker."

"I liked Callum!"

Kat blushed as she said it. James saw the twinkle of a smile on the faces of Branwen and Amanda at that. He though didn't get that. Callum had been terrible. He shook his head slowly.

"Sorry Kat. I think the only contenders are that Charlene Ryder and Randell Maclean."

Charlene was a petit fourth year. She had been able to bob in and out of the players rather easily however she lacked some speed while she did it. Randell on the other hand was a second year who judging by his older brothers (who were both in Ravenclaw) would grow to an impressive size. But as a second year he was small and nimble enough for the time being for a seeker. Plus he was faster than Charlene and just as swift.

It took them only ten minutes to argue out the player that they wanted. And as they headed up to the common room James was ready to find Randell and deliver him the good news.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Alice lifted the book she was reading higher as she tried to block out the image in front of her. Tilting her head backwards she gritted her teeth as she heard the small laugh that slipped from her friends lips.

"Stop it!"

There was the sound of a light slap and more giggling. Alice wanted to moan in annoyance. But instead she stood up pushing herself away from the table.

"No Alice wait."

Alice watched as Amanda pushed Sirius a little further away. Although it seemed that the space between them had widened she noticed that Sirius still had a hand resting on Amanda's thigh. The pair had been almost inseparable since their return to Hogwarts. Alice thought that it was sweet on the whole and that it showed that they really loved each other. But she didn't want to have to watch it all day every day. Especially when she was missing Frank so much.

"Sit back down Alice, please."

"No it's alright Mand."

"No Al seriously sit down and I'll go through that potion with you. Sirius can go play cards with the boys or something."

Alice watched the way that Sirius tried to hid the fact that he didn't want to go play cards with the boys. Again it was sweet but sickening.

"Honestly Mand its fine. You and Sirius stay where you are. I'll go speak to James and Lily about it."

She gave them a small smile and turned her back on them. As soon as they couldn't see her face the smile dropped. Quickly she walked across the room to another table. Lily and James were sat opposite each other. A single potion book was spread between them and they were scribbling on separate parchments of paper.

Alice pulled out the seat next to James as Lily looked up at her.

"They making you feel uncomfortable as well?"

"How can you tell?"

James chuckled next to her.

"They're making everyone."

The three turned to look at the couple. Sirius had closed the gap again and his lips were tracing Amanda's jaw line as she tried to write something. It was clear that she wasn't going to get far with that task.

"Were Frank and I ever that sickenly sweet?"

Lily shook her head as she went back to writing the ingredients that they were suppose to be looking up. James though gently dropped his left arm over Alice's shoulder. She noticed how it was a tender movement and she wondered if maybe he still felt a little pain in that arm. She knew that the healers had done a wonderful job with him. She had seen the skin on his arm since the attack. He had a burnt black patch on the inside of his arm just above his elbow. The rest of his arm was now a peachy colour again.

"How is Frank doing with the training?"

She gave a wide smile nodding her head gently.

"It's going good. He says that he's always tried after a day of training but I think that's to be expected. After all this is a war, they're going to push the new recruits as hard as they think they can. They need to be prepared."

James nodded a little and then she saw a wicked smile that she recognised.

"He's never too tired to write to you EVERY day is he?"

She pushed his side in a playful manner. It was strange how comfortable she felt with James. She had known him a long time but in the last year something had changed between them. She suspected that part of it was that she was living as a Potter. His mother had taken her into the family home and treated her like the daughter she had never had. This had of course led to James treating her like a sister. In fact the relationship she had built up with James reminded her of the way she and Aaron had once been.

She instantly sobered up. James seemed to notice.

"You miss him don't you."

It wasn't a question but a statement.

"It's strange but you remind me of him."

James' eyes went wide and she saw the panic in them.

"Alice I am not Frank. You're my friend but –"

"No. Oh James sorry. No I didn't mean Frank I meant Aaron."

He stopped his panic at that and gave her a strange look.

"Aaron really?"

"Sure. You tease me the same way he always did. And I don't know I kind of get a brother vibe off you these days."

"Brother I can handle, replacement boyfriend that would be another thing."

"You can't replace Frank."

"Don't I know it."

Alice felt her jaw drop and she sensed Lily's eyes on them. Did James just hint that he wanted to be her boyfriend?

"No sorry I didn't mean it that way. Damn no I meant it is hard to replace Frank. For me in Quidditch, Randell is okay but he's no Frank."

Alice laughed as she opened her potion book.

"I'll tell him that in my next letter. I'm sure he'll be glad to hear that. He misses Quidditch."

James gave a soft little smile.

"I can understand that. I'm going to miss Quidditch so much next year too."

"I thought you were going to try and go professional."

Alice and James both looked at Lily. Her head was tilted to the side as if she was taking James in in a new light.

"Once I was going to. But it seems a little childish now. There are more important things than Quidditch and I want to do something worth while."

"Really like what?"

Alice saw the way that James' hand went to his hair. It was a habit that she had noticed before. It was something he did when he was out to impress somebody.

"I've actually being considering going into the Auror department now for about two years."

"Two years! Wow I didn't know that."

Lily's hand went to her own hair. She started twisting strands. Alice felt her eyes go wide. It looked like Lily was mimicking James movements. Her smile was so wide that Alice wondered if she would be able to count all of Lily's teeth.

"Well what are you planning on doing Lily?"

"Something with charms I think."

Alice looked down at her book. This was just what she needed. Sirius and Amanda were turning everyone sick with their constant need to be around each other and now Lily was flirting with James. All she needed now was for Branwen and Remus to start making kissy faces at each and for Peter to turn up with a blonde on his arm. Alice was sure this was going to be a long year for her.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Albus looked around. There was a lot of chatter and laughing. He couldn't help but smile slightly at that. It was nice to see young people enjoying themselves. He put his glass down on the table and waited while the last few stragglers took their seats.

The Order of the Phoenix had been his creation nearly six years ago now. It felt to him though as if the Order had existed much longer than that. Maybe because this was what his life had been for so long. Preparing for wars.

Over the last six years he'd fought in a number of small battles that the general public seemed ignorant to. They weren't even his first battles. That had been in 1945. But he never thought of that battle if he could help it. He didn't want to remember that.

"Albus."

He looked at Moody and realised that the gathered members were seated. There weren't many there for this one. Alastor Moody was sat closest to him at the table. Then they were joined by Edgar Bones, Benjy Fenwick and Taliesin.

Albus once more studied Taliesin. He was looking better than he had two weeks earlier. He'd cut his hair short again, although he still had a shadow signalling the need to shave. But he seemed more alive than in the months since Dyfan's death.

"I have called this meeting today to discuss something of importance which I wish to keep between as few people as possible."

They all looked at him expectant and Albus nodded towards Alastor.

"We have finally managed to get someone high in the Death Eater ranks."

The three men remained silent as Alastor looked back at Albus.

"The reason we have called the three of you is that the person is someone close to all three of you."

Albus looked at the three men and wondered how much more they were able to take. Everyone was feeling the terrible pain of the war and to be on the inside was extremely difficult.

"Albus who is it?"

Edgar had his arms crossed over his chest and he looked tense. Benjy was on the edge of his seat looking terrified. Taliesin though looked pained.

"Dorcas Meadows."

The three men broke into shouts. Albus was thankful that he had chosen his office for this meeting. He knew that nobody would overhear them. Albus shared a look with Alastor. He had warned the Auror that the men would react this way when they were told the truth.

Albus looked at them. They were all so different and yet had so much in common. They were all risking everything for what they thought to be right. They didn't know if they had a future after this war but they knew that even if they died their families would have a chance at a better life. Good honest men, that's what Albus thought could win them the war.

"Albus you can't be serious."

Taliesin's voice was small. He understood why. Dorcas was one of Taliesin's oldest friends. In fact she was one of the few that he still kept in contact with. After Gwyn's death he shut a lot of people out of his life. Dorcas though wouldn't allow him to keep her away. She would turn up without announcement and Dyfan would let her in.

"I am sorry but she is under cover for us."

"Why her?"

Edgar looked like someone had punched him in the stomach. But Albus knew that he was just worried about his family. Dorcas was his sister-in-law. He was very close to his wife's family and knew that if she was discovered it could be the end of the Meadows.

"She was approached by Rosier a month ago. She made a big fuss of saying no but he kept coming back to her. It seems that she was targeted for a reason. I can't say what that is, I don't know yet. But she agreed to do it."

"Do…rca…s"

Albus couldn't be sure because Benjy's hands were covering his entire face but he felt certain that he had mumbled her name.

"Benjy –"

"What? Are you going to tell me that she's going to be fine? Are you going to tell me that she'll come back to me the same person? Can you promise me that?"

Alastor jumped at this one.

"Fenwick your girlfriend chose to do this. She wasn't forced by us to accept the position. But she's a brave woman. She's a fighter and I think she's proven that these last six years. Don't belittle her actions."

Albus picked up his drink and watched as the three men talked among themselves. This was what he hated about being a leader. You were forced to make the tough decisions that would upset people. He would never be able to please everyone. But Dorcas could pull this off. She was their best bet. For six years they had been trying to find someone who would be willing to pass them information. Now finally they had it.

Albus just hoped that she would be able to pull it off. Because he didn't know how much more he could personally take.


	13. Chapter 13

Okay so this chapter is a little different to any of the other ones that I've written. So I hope you will stick with it.

Chapter 13

_Joe_

_I can't believe we're back at Hogwarts now. It feels so strange to think that this is my last year here. But then I suppose you know what that feels like!_

_I'm really sorry that I couldn't be at the wedding yesterday. I really wanted to be there. I even bought new dress robes. They were a lovely chocolate brown. I bought them because you said that the brown brings out my eyes. But I had to be there for my nhad. I'm glad that I was._

_It was really strange though. He told me some things that really scared confused me. I learnt something about my family that I never knew before which really shocked me. My Aunt Karen was married to Dumbledore! It's strange because Tad told me all about her but he left that out. I wonder why? Although the fact he didn't tell me that means it isn't surprising that I didn't know she was pregnant when she died. I wish I could tell you what else I learnt. But I can't get my own mind around it._

_It was so nice of you to come to the station to see us off today. I was scared I wouldn't see you before I went back to Hogwarts. Alice was really pleased that you and Frank came to see her off. She's really going to miss the pair of you._

_The sorting was unusual again this year. The hat made reference to the war. Nobody really wants to take that seriously though do they? Not the war I mean, well maybe the war, but the uniting bit. Slytherin house just isn't going to accept the rest of us no matter what the hat says. Dumbledore looked frail and old though tired I think that he's over worked. Or maybe he just hasn't recovered from the shock of Tad …_

_I really should go to bed. It's late and lessons start again tomorrow. But I don't want to sleep. It's been a year and it feels so strange. I can't believe that it has passed so quickly. Amanda has been really bad tonight. She's been staring into space all evening and hasn't spoken. I found a bottle by her bed. I think she's taken a potion to sleep. I wish Remus would take one. He was still sat in the common room when I came up to the dorm room. I don't think he's going to go to bed tonight._

_Branwen_

***

Branwen

Don't worry about missing the wedding. I understand that you needed to be at the graveyard. I would have been more surprised if you had come to the wedding instead. I think what you've done for Tad is a lovely thing. I know that I would want to be with my wife when the time comes.

You didn't miss much at the wedding though. I'm sure that Alice will have told you all about it by now. Mrs L (or Mrs C as I'm now suppose to call her) really looked lovely in her robes. She was so happy and I don't think I've ever seen anyone look that happy. It made me hope that maybe one day I'll be able to make you look that happy. It was a perfect day except that I missed you.

Anton was a complete goof ball as usual mind. He's so sure of himself in everything but I wish he would be shyer when it comes to dancing. I swear I thought he was going to kill one of Victor's sisters. He did this move with his hips which caused him to fall over and he knocked, I think her name was Valerie, down with him. He did have the decency to turn red though.

Did you honestly not know that your Aunt was married to Dumbledore? Wow that surprises me. It was all over the Prophet this summer. But then you did try to keep clear of it all didn't you. I don't blame you for that though. The whole thing about the family curse seems a load of rubbish to me. Your family have always been active in sticking up for what's right and that's led them to lose their lives. I just hope that it doesn't lead you the same way.

I didn't know that she had been pregnant though. That wasn't ever published in any of the papers. I really feel bad for Dumbledore now. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to come home and find your wife dead. But to know that she was also carrying your baby. Well I wouldn't be able to cope.

What else did your dad tell you? Come on you can tell me. I swear I won't tell anyone. Not even Frank! Maybe I can help you wrap your head around it. I want to be able to help you. I want you to feel that you can tell me anything. It can't be that bad can it?

I had to come to the station to say goodbye to everyone. I couldn't bear to let you go to Hogwarts without getting to say goodbye. I wanted to make sure that Frank didn't jump on the train to go back with Alice. Although I almost did that myself. It was so strange to stand there and watch the train pull off. I wanted to be on there, I wanted to be allowed to come back to Hogwarts for another year. I want to be with you.

We ended up going to the Leaky Cauldron after you left. It felt like the right thing to do. My brothers were both there along with Gideon and Fabian Prewett. We talked late into the night about Ginny. Do you know she was always getting in trouble from a young age? It was because she was trying to be like Molly. Her brothers didn't realise though that she never changed that much.

Frank and I ended up telling them about a lot of the pranks that happened. Remember the time she gave Frank antlers! They loved that story. And when she turned Peter blue. We had a good laugh remembering all of those things. But I think the thing that stuck with us the most was the fact that for such a pretty girl she was real. She was down to earth, kind and really cared about her friends. Just like you. I think you girls are all amazing because you're all like that.

I'm not surprised that the hat reacted like that in the sorting. I think that it's always going to do that until the war is over. Or until the houses unite. I think you're right though. The Slytherin house is out there on its own. Don't get me wrong there are some within the house that are decent like Christopher. I don't know if you remember but he died back in … He was a good guy and he was a Slytherin. But on the whole they are terrible.

I think that Dumbledore is probably tired. He does a lot of things outside of Hogwarts. Some things you know about and others can't be discussed in a letter. But he'll give his all even if he is shattered. He knows that the best place for him is in the school. After all You-Know-Who Voldemort fears him. That means him being there makes it safer for all the students. Although I'd feel that you were safer if I was there.

I hope that your first day of lessons did go well. I'm sorry that I didn't reply to this sooner but my hang-over kicked in yesterday. I'm not very good with alcohol apparently. But that's not a surprise. My brothers have had eight years practice over me. Have you picked a new seeker yet? I hope whoever you get is decent I don't want to see Slytherin win again. Let me know when the first game is as well. Hopefully I'll be able to come up and watch you.

Joe

***

_Joe_

_Where to begin! I heard you on the radio on Saturday. Well I heard the start of it anyway. You sounded amazing. You belong on the radio. I was really proud. We were all sat in the common room and we started whooping as soon as we realised that it was you. It was nice to get to listen to you speak again, I've missed that. Unfortunately Quidditch tryouts were on at the same time so we missed it. But Remus, Peter, Lily and Alice stayed in the common room. And they told us you were brilliant. We're hoping that you'll be doing another one soon so we can all listen._

_Picking a new seeker. Wow now there's a good story for you. James got all captain on us and he made us all try out. I couldn't believe it when he told us that. I thought Mand was going to hit him across the head with her broom! But he only did it so that the house can't make the same comments they did last year._

_But we knocked the competition away anyway. I swear you should have seen their faces when we did the warm up fly around. Amanda over lapped everyone! Kat was right behind her and then it was me, Jackie and Sirius. The rest of the house couldn't believe it. We did this other warm up where you have to toss the ball and it was groups of five. So we put ourselves into a group without James' say so. We even threw the ball at him to make sure that he could stay on the team. It was rather funny._

_Well then they started them. Honestly it was really funny. There were about five hopefuls for Keeper. So James is up there throwing the Quaffle through the hoops and he's getting some passed but when its one person it's so easy. So Jackie and Amanda took over. They stole the ball from James and ran plays. It made it tougher. Sirius was the only one who managed to stop the play passes._

_Beater wise a second year named Freddie hit the Bludger wrong and ended up breaking his hand. It was really funny but I was good I didn't laugh until later when there was no-one around. I know that sounds horrible but you didn't see him. He had the bat in the wrong hand and instead of swapping over he just used the hand without the bat! I mean where is the common sense?_

_Then chaser tryout. Well there was no way anybody was going to have the same chemistry with James that Mand has. You've seen them fly together. But this third year really thought he was great, like he was the next Pullman or something. He only went and knocked James off his broom. Jackie and Amanda had to go into a quick dive to catch him. He ended up with his glasses and hair in the mud but that's a small price to pay._

_So long story short we all made it back onto the team. Which wasn't really surprising. I pity Kat, Jackie and Randell when they have to replace four of us next year. Because seriously most of them need to start practicing already. But Randell I need to tell you about him. He's a second year who has two brothers in Ravenclaw. He's going to be massive when he finishes growing but at the moment he's perfect for a seeker. Mind he's no Frank but he was better than any of the others._

_But oh we got James good on the day. I think you'll like this one. He dismissed everyone back to the common room after the tryout and we as a team decided that we want to discuss the new player away from the rest of the house. So we followed him into the changing rooms._

_It was so funny. I had a magazine which I read while James showered (and he's worse than Lily and she spends twenty minutes in the shower if she wants to be quick) Kat and Jackie were joking while Sirius was basically all over Amanda. It's getting hard to watch. But you should have seen the look on James' face when he came out of the shower._

_Oh before I forget the first game is on November thirteenth. We're going to have to have a lot of practice. We want to make sure that Randell understands the way that we play and doesn't get in the way when he's actively seeking the Snitch._

_Lessons were okay._

_Getting back into lessons has been easy._

_Everyone seems to be settling back into the routine of classes and homework. And amazingly we're in our second week and there hasn't been any detentions yet. Mind I think James is on his best behaviour now that he's head boy and Sirius is too occupied with Amanda to cause any trouble._

_My Nhad is looking better now as well. I was scared that him coming back to the school would be too much. He wasn't coping very well at all this summer. But I've already told you that. But he's finally had his hair cut short and he's wearing clothes that don't look like they've been slept in. And his teaching isn't suffering._

_I'm really sorry that it's been two weeks since I last wrote. I'm not avoiding you. It's just that I'm finding it difficult to answer one of the questions. I've been trying to work something out in my head. Something that I haven't been ready to tell anyone. And Lily doesn't even know this. But okay here it goes. My grandfather on my mam's side was Gogrfran. That probably doesn't mean much to you either. He was the King of the Giants._

_My mam was a giant. Only she wasn't. It's complicated. But Merlin okay. You've heard the story of King Arthur and Camelot right? Well my mam was Gwenhwyfar as in Arthur's wife. I hope you know the story because it's long and if you don't I'll explain it in the next letter. But anyway she was a witch and so didn't grow to be a giant._

_The reason this has been stuck in my head is that nhad thinks it's important that I know. He thinks that You-Know-Who, Voldemort knows. But I'm not so sure. Not many people know that my mam came to this time. In fact the only people that know are Dumbledore, nhad, me, Lily and now you. Tad knew of course but I don't know how You-Know-Who, Voldemort would know._

_Nhad thinks it's important because Gogrfran's line died out two centuries ago. His line was seen as the true royalty in the Giant world. And since the line died out there has been in fighting over who should rule. But as his granddaughter I am technically the Queen of the giants. How strange does that sound? I don't want to take it any further. Tad didn't want me to know and that must be because he thought me getting involved would be a bad idea. So I'm not going to get involved._

_So any chance you'll be on the radio soon?_

_Branwen._

***

Your highness

Sorry I couldn't resist that. So you're royalty. That explains so much. Makes me feel terrible though. I'm a nobody that's fallen for a Queen. It's a pity I'm not a Prince, or a King. I suppose this means that we can never work. I think you're smart not to want to follow it up. Voldemort has the support of the giants. As long as you stay out of it he'll leave you alone. If the giants don't know you're the Queen then he has no reason to think that they'll follow you.

I wish that I had been able to see the Quidditch tryouts. I told Frank about that part of your letter. He was a little put out that he hadn't heard about it from Alice. But then I did point out that she doesn't really know that much about the game, unlike you. So he's written a letter to James, Sirius and Amanda combined. He would have added you to it but he seems to think I'm monopolising your time as it is. But apparently he's getting all involved with the team still. He wants to know if there's anything he can do to help. I think he wants to make up for last year.

I must say you were all mean to sit there while James was showering. What would have happened if his towel had fallen? Poor Jackie and Kat wouldn't have known what to do. I'm sure you, Amanda and Sirius would never have let him live that down mind. Although I do hope that you didn't go there because you actually wanted to see him starker, it wouldn't do much for my confidence. It sounds like Amanda and Sirius are getting along well then. Maybe there'll be wedding bells by the end of the year.

It's good to hear that Taliesin is getting better. It seems so strange to write his name. It's always been Ddraig. But I saw him a couple of days ago and he told me off. Apparently since I'm no longer his student I'm not required to call him by his surname. It feels strange being on first names terms with him though. I mean he's your dad and …

You actually heard my first attempt on the radio! Wow I'm so glad that you did. It was so strange though. I have never been so nervous. I'm use to speaking for the crowds at Hogwarts but there's something that really is frightening when it's the entire country listening to your voice. I'm sorry that you didn't get to hear the whole game. It was amazing. Kathy has really come on as a player although she didn't captivate me the same way that you do. She was fantastic after the game she actually came over to speak to me. That really impressed old Bet the technician with me. I think he might have a hot spot for the girl.

But here's the best bit of news. I've been offered the position of co-presenter with Pippa for Quidditch games. That means every Saturday I'll be on the radio giving the highlights of earlier games and covering the main event. I'm hoping that I will be able to contain any comments about Anton when he's playing. I mean comments that give away the fact that he's my brother. I don't want people thinking that's the only reason I got the job. Although saying that they must like me somewhat because they've hinted that maybe they'll put me on the Wednesday night games as well. Pippa refuses to work them because of her children. They are only young after all.

I am hoping that I will be able to get the thirteenth off. They might go for it, I'm not sure. I hope they do though I miss not getting to see you everyday. Any idea when your Hogsmeade dates are going to be? Frank and I have been thinking about meeting you all in the village and go have a couple of drinks in the Three Broomsticks. It'll be nice to be able to catch up properly.

So I hope to hear from you soon.

Regards Joe.

***

_Joe_

_I heard you on the radio last night. I think you were great. You're commentary was fantastic. I really felt like I was at the game. I loved the way you described Anton as he 'bumped' into Meyer. Honestly you were not biased towards him and if I didn't know you were related I'd never have guessed._

_Things here are the same as ever. Classes are getting so much harder though. Well not the classes but the workload. I'm sure I'm going to fall behind at any moment. Gryffindor common room is different though. I miss having you here. It's strange to think that we're the oldest ones here now._

_Everyone says hello. They're all doing well. Some of them are driving me crazy though. You wouldn't believe the way that Sirius and Amanda are acting. We're a month into the school term and they haven't had a fight yet, well in public anyway. They're constantly all over each other. It's rather sickening. It's gotten to the point where it's difficult for any of us to be around them. But the joke is that neither of them seem to realise that they're in love._

_And Lily! Joe she's completely lost her mind. I don't know what's come over her lately. I'm worried about her. I'm not sure if I should worry about her. You'll probably laugh at the reason why I'm worrying though. She's flirting with James. I know it seems like nothing but it's not Lily. She hates him. She's never seen anything in him before that's had her like this. I just wish I knew if it's him that she's falling for or his position as Head Boy._

_Quidditch is well I don't know how to describe it this year. We're pretty much sorted with the basic stuff. I mean our team hasn't really changed. James is a good captain, but our seeker Randell well he's not very good he just isn't Frank. I know he's only just learning the position but I don't know how well we're going to do. Chaser wise we're fantastic, and Sirius is amazing as keeper and Kat and I are doing well with our part but Randell seems a bit out of it. I'm hoping that if we practice all month he'll get better. He better had anyway otherwise we might get lynched by the other Gryffindors. Our first game is on the 13th November. I really wish you would be able to come up and see me play._

_How is Frank? Alice really misses him. I miss you too. I hope he's going to visit her soon. I think she needs to see him. It might be a good time for them to meet up. Especially with the anniversary coming up soon. How are you coping with that?_

_Our first Hogsmeade visit isn't until the twentieth November. Dumbledore has pretty much cancelled them. Although he has agreed to allow anyone over seventeen to go there. I think he's worried about another attack. I'm not sure if I'll be able to go though. I mean it is where Tad…_

_I'll write to you again soon. I promise_

_Love_

_Branwen._

***

Bran

Can I suggest a cold bucket of water for Sirius and Amanda? Does that sound cruel to you? Maybe you should accidentally hit one of them with a Bludger. That way they'll have to spend some time apart. Okay so all joking aside here. You should tell them. Talk to the pair of them and tell them that the mushy stuff is too sickening for you all. They'll understand and maybe they'll move it to somewhere more private. Although that could lead to some trouble… Sirius would like that!

Now onto the Lily problem. Again you should talk to her. Tell her that you're just looking out for her best interests. I mean its not as if she hasn't gotten her nose stuck in your business. She did try to convince you that I was wrong for you. Maybe the truth is that now she's managed to put aside her differences with James she's realised that there's a spark there. And I think there is. Not to get all mushy on you but James has had strong feelings towards her for a while and well Frank and I always thought that they would be well suited. They're different and yet the same. I think that there would be a balance between them that could work.

The anniversary. Wow I've been trying to keep that in the back of my mind. But it's nearly impossible. It's strange but in some ways it seems like more than a year and in others less. I suppose last year passed so quickly that it has crept up on me. But I'm handling it well. I plan to go somewhere with my brothers. Kyle is organising it though so Merlin only knows what we will end up doing.

How is Alice coping with it though? I think it must be harder on her than on me. And I don't mean that to sound as if I'm braver. It's the fact that I still have Kyle and Anton. They can share the grief and the good times. I'm glad that she has you guys though. I mean you practically lived with her at certain times, I know Amanda did. So at least there are people that can remember her family with her. Frank is really torn up because he feels that he's letting her down. I wouldn't be surprised if he turns up at Hogwarts on that day. I might do that myself. Just because I really want to see you again, and I'm sick of hiding that fact.

Branwen the truth is that I miss you. And I will understand if you don't feel the same way. I was really worried that you going back to Hogwarts would cause us to drift apart. But I've found that every morning I wait for the post to arrive to see if I have a letter from you. And when I get one I can't stop smiling for the whole day. The boys in the office call you my 'sweetheart' and I think you are. I wish more than anything that I had discovered these feelings a long time ago. Because I think that we could be good together, and I hope that we can make it if we work. But it's hard being away from you and we're not in an established relationship. But I wish we were and there I've said it.

And I feel like an insensitive jerk Anton is reading this over my shoulder and he's also just read your last letter. Here I am declaring my undying love for you after asking you to come to Hogsmeade to meet me. That was insensitive. But if you say that you want to see me I will come up to Hogwarts to see you instead.

There I think all my cards are laid bare. The next move is yours.

Love Joe

***

_Joe_

_People think that I'm crazy. I haven't stopped smiling since I got your last letter. I don't know what to say or how to say it …_

_It's Alice here Joe. She's madly in love with you!_

_She just stole my quill. I'm sorry for that. She read your letter. I couldn't stop myself. I had to show someone. And there are things that I want to answer before I get to that point._

_Your advice worked wonders and we all thank you so much. Amanda and Sirius have resided to the fact that they've been too touchy feeling with each other. They're still close but at least now we can be in the same room as them. Well most of the time. There are still those odd moments …_

_Who can blame them though? If Frank were here I'd want to be with him too. Just like Branwen wants to be with you._

_Do you think I'll get into much trouble if I transfigure Alice into a teacup? She won't let me write this letter on my own. She's under the impression that I will scare you away with something that I'll say. Which is stupid because I've been writing to you for the last month and some of the contents should have scared you but they didn't._

_Anyway Lily next. I spoke to her privately like you said and you're right again. There is something between them. But she doesn't know what it is. Although funny thing is she didn't realise she was flirting so openly with him! I must admit he is more mature this year than he has been in the past. Although he did get detention yesterday along with the other three boys. It seems now that Sirius has pulled a little away from Amanda the pranks are starting back up._

_Oh alright Alice wants to answer the next question herself._

_I'm not thinking of the anniversary. I have told Frank that but I don't think he believes me. There is so much work that I have to do that I don't have time. I've fallen a little behind in potions but Mand is helping me. That is taking up all my free time. I'm sure that I will be upset on the day but I will keep busy. That's all that I can do. Although I do hope that you and Frank might be able to come and visit that day. It would make it so much better. Plus Branwen wants to see …_

_Okay so that's it for Alice. I have come now to the part that I have been pondering over for the last couple of hours. This is my fifth attempt to write this letter (which is why Alice is watching me this time.)_

_The simple truth is that I miss you too. I often find myself looking for you in the Great Hall or the common room. I can't seem to wrap my mind over the fact that you're not a student here anymore. I miss getting to sit with you and joke around. I enjoyed the end of last term so much because I saw a glimpse of what I could have, at what I want._

_Tad once told me that I was missing what was right under my nose. And he was right. You've been here all this time and I didn't notice. I kick myself each day for that. Because I think that I could love you. I think that there is a possibility that you could be the one for me. And I'm blushing just writing that._

_Come up to Hogwarts. Come and see me. I want too –_

_She wants to throw her arms around you and kiss you passionately._

_Alice! She's right though. I want to hug you and kiss you again. I miss you so much. Please come to Hogwarts._

_Love Branwen._

_

* * *

_

I'm a little bit disapointed. I had that written out in different script so that it looked like handwriting. But I couldn't get it to transfer in those styles and it wouldn't let me change them. So Branwen's has been changed to italics and Joe's is in normal.

Okay so that's this chapter. Like I said it's very different. Branwen and Joe have been falling for each other for a while. And I don't know when it happened. One day Tad just happened to bring it up and it's happened. I think the man may have been a seer, in fact that's a lie because I know he was. And I think he might have glimpsed Branwen and Joe happy together.

I wanted to show their relationship starting out. They spent a lot of time together over the summer but they were in that funny stage where you can sometimes kiss but nothing seems to happen. There's no relationship. But of course Joe has left Hogwarts so that made it a lot harder.

I hope that you like the letter idea because I didn't want him to just turn up in Hogwarts and they'd be together. Although there is a hint of what is coming there. I also liked the idea of looking at the development of Lily and James from the perspective of someone close to them.

So I hope you enjoyed and more soon.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Sirius closed his book and started to drum his fingers on the table. He was distracted and he didn't know why. He was suppose to be working on his Transfiguration essay. Leaning back on his chair he looked around the room.

His eyes landed on Amanda and he smiled to himself. It was strange that they hadn't been alone together for about three days now. It felt wrong to him. Since they had arrived back at the school they had barely been out of each others company. He knew that it was driving everyone crazy; Branwen had even mentioned it in Quidditch one night. So they were making an effort to distance themselves.

It was a smart idea he admitted that. He had missed a month of pranks with the boys. Not that there was a chance for much pranks with James. He seemed to be taking his duties as Head Boy very seriously. But that hadn't stopped them from getting Snape two days earlier. That had felt good.

Sirius also felt that he had been letting Remus and Peter down in some way. The four of them had always been close and they had promised that nothing would ever change that. But it seemed that the bond was beginning to break. Cracks were already beginning to form and he knew that part of it was his fault.

He loved his friends they were his family. But he loved Amanda more. Hell he couldn't believe that he was unable to tell her that though. When he looked at her everything else just faded away. It was as though the rest of the world didn't exist it was just her. He could happily stare at her for hours and not get bored.

He had never been one to think long term before. His attitude had always been about the here and now. But he could imagine his future now. He could picture himself marrying Amanda and having a couple of children. He could see them watching as their family grew up as they got older. They would of course be mad as hatters but that wouldn't matter. He knew in this instant that he would love the girl for all eternity. He couldn't think of anything better.

She turned her head slightly and he caught his breath as her chocolate brown eyes caught his. She was beautiful there was no doubt about that. He had once thought that dark eyes could never be alluring. He couldn't understand that thought now though.

She gave him a quick bright smile before she turned back to the girls. He knew that they were also working on the Transfiguration essay. He had hoped that he would be able to work on the essay with Amanda. But just as he felt guilty over the boys it seemed she felt that way over the girls. He knew that she was in a rather strange position that had never occurred before.

The girls were all extremely attractive and at least two of them had always been in a relationship at a time. That was of course still the case Amanda was with him and Alice was with Frank. But Frank was no longer at Hogwarts. So Amanda was the only one with a boyfriend that she actually got to see. Neither of them had considered the implications to that at the time but it was clear that Alice was hurting because of that. So Amanda had spoken with him and they had decided to tone things down if only for Alice's sake.

That was why she was sat with the girls. He watched as they laughed about something seemingly enjoying each others company. How he wished he could just get up and walk over there. He wanted to wrap his arms around the girl but he had promised her that he would sit on this side of the room with the boys and do his work.

"Will you stop with the tapping!"

Sirius looked at Remus. He looked irritated and it wasn't difficult to understand why. It was the sixth October and in two days the moon would be at it's fullest. He was already feeling the pull of it and it was sending him into a crabby sort of mood.

"Sorry."

Sirius laid his hands on the table. Remus though looked at the other two boys.

"I don't know what is more annoying the tapping or him with Amanda."

Sirius's mouth dropped a little as he looked at the other two.

"Amanda and I aren't annoying. Are we?"

Peter simply nodded but James answered.

"It's uncomfortable to watch the pair of you together. I mean you're not even sat together and you're gazing at her."

Sirius rested his elbows on the table and lowered his head into his hands.

"Slap me next time okay."

The three boys gave him a look but he didn't see it. He was again looking at the girls. Something new had just caught his eye. He wasn't the only one that was gazing. Lily's full attention was directed at their table. She was checking James out!

"Ouch!"

Sirius' elbow slipped and he smacked his chin on the table. Peter gave a sheepish look at him.

"You said to slap you."

"I wasn't gazing at Amanda."

"Looked that way."

Peter's reply was a low murmur. But Sirius simply smiled as he leaned towards the boy.

"Look at the girls. Which one is gazing over here?"

All four boys looked in the direction and quickly Lily's eyes went to her essay. He heard James swear as he dropped his quill under the table. Sirius laughed lightly as the boy bent down to get it. Peter though was giving Sirius a strange look.

"Haven't you noticed that before then?"

"She's been doing it before?"

Remus tutted at them placing his quill down on the table in a manner that was harder than maybe he had originally intended.

"Lily has been flirting with James for two weeks now. Only because he's being all mature and grown up he refuses to ask her out."

"I promised her I'd stop."

Three sets of eyes were on James. Sirius shook his head slowly.

"Make the move. She'll be like putty in your hand judging by her gaze."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Joe crouched down as he laid the flowers across the plot in front of him. He felt sick standing here. This was horrible. He had been pretending that today was going to be easy but what had he been thinking.

The eighth October would always be a difficult date for him from now on. It didn't matter that it meant nothing to the world in general. This was a personal tragedy that marked the day. It had been exactly a year since his mother had disappeared. He could still remember finding out. It was as clear as if it had been yesterday.

He had been sat in the Gryffindor common room. He had been waiting for his Astronomy lesson later that night. While he waited he had watched as a Quidditch meeting was being held. It was the first time that year that the Quidditch team had been complete. Amanda had only recently been released from the hospital wing.

As he had watched Alice had come and sat next to him. They had been talking about Astronomy and work loads, or at least he had thought so. She had asked him how to cope with Ginny's death. She had commented that nobody was coping well and that had been true. The wound had been too new. He hadn't understood at first why she had come to him though.

But the truth had been easy. At that point other than Ginny's death the only deaths had been Lily's mother, James' father and his father. Alice had calmly told him that Lily wasn't able to stop crying over Ginny and James had refused to mention her name. They were falling apart. He had been the only one she had felt able to come to.

He had been surprised by how easily he had spoken of his father's death. Or maybe it was moving on from the death. It had been right to tell the girl to remember the good and forget the bad. That was how you moved on. He remembered that she had said that they all expected Ginny to turn up at any moment. He still felt that way sometimes about the girl, but also about his mother.

Of course that conversation had ended. That hadn't been so bad. He liked Alice had done for a long time. She was a lovely girl and he knew that she meant the world to Frank. Even when they were apart. After that though things started to get a bit fuzzy with the memory.

He remembered sitting at a table with Shane and Sara. They were the only other seventh year Gryffindors taking the class with him. He remembered that Alice, Lily and Branwen had been sat together in a corner and that Frank, James, Sirius and Peter were sat together doing something.

Then there had been a scream. It was Amanda having one of her nightmares. Alice had mentioned it earlier that night in their conversation. Alice had quickly run up to the dorm room as people had opened doors and started yelling to shut her up. It was at that point that they stood up to leave. But before they could Kyle had been there.

It was a strange moment. Kyle was ten years older than Joe and he never visited Hogwarts. But there he had been stood in the Gryffindor common room looking extremely out of place. Kyle had looked wrong to Joe straight away. He had been rumpled with his robes looking like he'd been in them for days and his blonde hair had been unkempt due to multiply attempts to run his fingers through it.

What had scared Joe the most though had been the way that his brother had just walked passed him and dropped onto the sofa. It was an act that looked normal; as if it was something he did everyday. But his grey eyes so like Joe's had stared into the fire and not seen anything.

The brief conversation ran through Joe's mind…

"_Kyle?"_

"_Kyle you're twenty eight years old. You're not a student so what you doing here?"_

"_Can't a guy come to visit his kid brother?"_

"_At twenty past eleven in the night. No. Spit it out now Kyle I have Astronomy in forty minutes."_

That was when things had gotten worse though. Because suddenly the portrait hole had opened for a second time. By this time Joe had forgotten the other students in the common room and his eyes had moved to see Anton his other brother enter the room. If he hadn't thought something had happened before his second brother arriving had told him something was wrong.

Anton had looked as bad as Kyle. It was clear that he had been at Quidditch practice sometime that evening. He was wearing his robes and they were splattered in mud. That wasn't surprising because if Joe remembered correctly it had been raining the entire day the year earlier. He had dropped onto the sofa next to Kyle and his head went into hands. He had pulled his dirty hands through his dark locks and then his grey eyes (identical to his two brothers) had been filled with sorrow. The conversation that followed was one that still sent shivers up Joe's spine.

"_Joe mate we need to talk to you."_

"_Like I've told Kyle I have a lesson –"_

"_It's mum Joe."_

"_Joe you know how dad always said that there's a right way and a wrong way to live."_

"_Yeah."_

"_Well there's some evidence that he was developing something within the ministry that he thought could help Dumbledore against You-Know-Who. But when he died the ministry destroyed all records of it and stopped whatever it was"_

"_What's happened?"_

"_We think that dad might have taken some of the notes home with him. Mum was clearing out and it seems that she may have come across them."_

"_And?"_

"_She's gone."_

"_What? Where can she have gone?"_

"_The house was broken into and the Dark Mark was found over it. There's evidence of a struggle and she's gone. You-Know-Who has taken mum…"_

A shiver ran through Joe's body. He looked back around the gravesite. He had decided to come early in the day on his own. He realised that maybe it was a stupid idea and that he should have waited for his brothers but he had wanted to come by early. It was a Monday and Anton was in Quidditch practice and Kyle was in the ministry.

It was strange to think how different a day could be. Last year there had been storms and today the sky was blue and the sun shone brightly. It was the kind of day that would have made his mother happy. It still hurt him to think of his mother. The aftermath of the revelation had been so hard.

He hadn't believed his brothers at first. Not because he thought it was a lie but because he hadn't wanted to believe it. The last time he had seen his mother they had fought. It was horrible to realise that his last memory of her was of him screaming that he had been a mistake and that she had never loved him. He hoped like mad that she had realised that he hadn't meant it. But it was hard to live knowing that was their last conversation.

So his brothers had taken him that night to the house. None of them had returned there since that night. It was filled with too many sad memories. Mrs Longbottom had gone and emptied the house for them. Kyle and Anton had taken care of storage and getting rid of what wasn't needed. They then sold the house and shared the money between them.

Joe shook his head again trying to get rid of the memories of that night. But it was difficult. It didn't help him that he knew that his mother's body wasn't here. His father was buried below the marker but they didn't know what had happened to her, and he knew they never would.

He wished that he was able to tell her about the year she had missed. He wanted to know what she would have thought of the fact that he had graduated Hogwarts, that he had gotten all E's in his NEWTS and that he was a presenter on the radio. He knew that his mother had wanted him to go into the ministry at one stage but she had learnt to accept the fact that she had three very different boys.

But what Joe wanted to speak to her about the most was something that he couldn't talk to his brothers about. He wanted to know what his mother would think of a certain girl in his life. He loved his brothers but he knew that they would laugh and tease him about it. They thought the fact that Frank was practically married was funny. What would they think if he settled down?

Admittedly he wasn't planning to propose to the girl in question but he would be the only wild boy to have a girlfriend. He knew that Kyle had been serious with two girls in he past and Anton hadn't lasted more than three months. He wanted to know what his mother would think.

In truth he wanted to know that his mother was proud of him. That she thought he was living the right way. That he wasn't making mistake after mistake. That was why today was harder than any other day. He tried not to look back and live in the present. But sometimes that was impossible.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

The lake sat silent as a chill night breeze brushed the lawns at its feet. Not a ripple could be seen as the twinkling stars reflected on its water. Then slowly a strip of pale light started to brush at its surface. As the evening wore on the light became brighter as slowly the moon at its fullest sat over it.

The grounds of Hogwarts looked like something from a fairytale. Everything was in its correct place as the inhabitants of the school slumbered through the night. That is all but four. A large dog ran along the open grass before dropping to the floor rolling around.

Nobody witnessed this though. Nobody noticed a large wolf like creature go into a pounce and launch itself through the air towards the dog. The moon was the only witness as a struggle broke out. The two animals made growling noises before rolling down the grass. A large splash signalled the two entering the lake.

As the two broke the surface it would have seemed that they were grinning. Splashes erupted around them as the dog ran around the shallow water. A long howl broke the air as the wolf creature spotted a tentacle and tried to chase it into deeper water.

Before it had gotten too far a third animal appeared in the water. This one was different. It matched the first two in stance but looked much grander. There was no wet fur, no growling. The moonlight reflected against strong white antlers. The stag lowered its head a little and nudged the wolf back towards the bank.

A large paw knocked the stag back a few inches but then the dog was barking. The wolf turned and let out a growl before setting chase. It looked like a well rehearsed game between the pair. As they hit the soft grassland the wolf stopped in its chase and lowered its nose to the ground.

Long sniffs echoed through the night air. Then with its hind in the air the wolf began to follow an invisible trail. The moon watched as an eagerness took over the creature. Its pace increased as it wove around stones and trees. Then as it came in line with the first trees of the forest an excited sound left its lips. It began to run and then with a nip dropped to the ground.

A rat ran out from a root and twisted itself around the large paw of the wolf. The dog and stag were at the side of the wolf watching as it tried to follow the rat as it went under its legs.

The moon watched silently as the four creatures interacted. It was a strange scene. Four animals that would never under normal circumstances be around each other. It would seem that there was a bond of friendship that eclipsed the species.

If anybody had looked through one of the windows they would have thought it odd. A wolf, dog, stag and rat playing together. Few would realise the truth. That in the grounds three Animagi and a werewolf were free of all bonds.

* * *

I know this chapter is a little on the short side. I haven't done one of the full moon chapters for a while so decided to slot this one in. I wanted to show the fun side of the transformations where they just play around and basically enjoy the freedom of being animals and having the grounds to themselves. I'll post the next chapter later this week to make up for the shortness of this one

Kris xx


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

_Lily_

_Please reconsider your choice on the matter. Petunia didn't mean what she said to you. She is just worried about the plans. It would really make her happy if you were able to attend. I think she believes that it is too far for you to come down just for the weekend. But it is her wedding day and you are her sister. Do you realise that she only has one bridesmaid? She needs you there._

_I understand that for some reason distance has grown between the pair of you. I don't understand why this is you were always so close as little girls. Maybe it is the fact that you have attended this private school up in Scotland while your sister stayed local. But that shouldn't change the fact that you are sisters. No matter what happens in life the pair of you will always be sisters._

_I know that I can't force you to be there if you don't want to. But Lily this is your sisters only wedding day. It is a reason to celebrate and we've had little to celebrate of late. I don't want to frighten you with the truth but this could be our last chance to be together as a family. Things are changing quickly and there is precious little time left to us._

_Maybe you and Tuney really have grown so far apart that neither of you will be upset by your absence on the day. But Lily it will break your fathers heart. Do one last thing for him. Come to the wedding._

_Pa Evans._

Lily folded the sheet in half and lowered her head. How many times had see read this letter over the last three days? She felt the pang in her heart that she was growing to hate. It was the feeling she got when she thought of her father and his illness.

She knew that she was lucky to have had the last two years with him. There was a point when they had thought that they would lose him. But he had grown strong and fought. She had seen him gain strength and prove that he wasn't going to let the disease defeat him.

But then in a painful twist of fate the disease had proven to be stronger. He was weaker now than he had ever been. Lily was aware of that fact. Pa Evans was in constant communication with her. Of course he didn't understand how the post to Hogwarts worked. So she was lucky that he was able to send it to Frank who was then sending it via owl. She knew that Frank was sending a lot of letters back and fore for her.

She opened the letter and re-read it again. 'Do one last thing for him'. That little sentence played through her mind so much. She had known that her father's time was running out but it seemed more real in writing. She had always assumed that they still had enough time for the things that she wanted him there for.

She had imagined the day he would walk her down the aisle of her own wedding. She would be in a simple yet elegant ivory gown that would suit her colouring and make her eyes sparkle. He would smile and squeeze her arm in a comforting manner as they got closer and closer to the man she loved.

Then he would whisper in her ear that he loved her and that no matter what happened she would always be his little girl. Then he would step back and watch proudly as she spoke the vows that would connect her forever with her true love.

Afterwards he would be all smiles as the photos were taken. He would kiss her cheek and shake the hand of her husband telling him that he had a wonderful woman. He would speak to her husband in a kind tone that would tell him that he was part of the Evans family now and would be a son to him.

Then at the reception he would make a wonderful speech about how lucky the pair of them were. He would speak about how wonderful she looked and how much her mother would have wanted to be there. He would speak words of advice while telling a story that would embarrass her to the core. Then he would have the second dance of the evening with her.

She could also imagine a year later going to her childhood home carrying a small bundle. It would be her child, a boy or girl she didn't care. Her father would smile and congratulate them on the wonderful addition to the family. He would be a joyful grandfather who would happily spoil the little one.

Slowly though the image slipped away. She realised now that they were only dreams. That they would never be reality. The truth was that it seemed unlikely that her father would live long enough to see her marry someone and there was an even smaller chance that he would ever get to see his grandchild, be it hers or Petunias.

She hated that line from the letter that said they were running out of time. She hated it so much because it was true. She had learnt over the last seven years that life was delicate and short. No matter what there was never enough time. You couldn't predict how long you had in this world. You could be the lucky one that lived to be a hundred or the unlucky one that didn't get to see your twentieth birthday.

But she couldn't go to Petunia's wedding. It didn't matter if she wanted to or not. Petunia had made it clear that she didn't want Lily there. Too much had happened to make them very different people. Maybe if she hadn't have come to Hogwarts she and Petunia would still be the best of friends. But she had come here. She had changed more than Pa Evans could understand.

Petunia's life was rather simple in comparison to Lily's. Petunia didn't have to worry about a war. She didn't need to worry that she was going to be murdered. Petunia's biggest problem was their father's health problems. Her goals were to have children and raise them.

But for Lily it wasn't that simple. And the thing that made it worse was that Petunia understood that. She had seen an attack first hand. It had been three years ago when they had been in Wales staying with Branwen. Tad had gotten Petunia out first but it had stuck with her. Up until that point she had thought magic was just fun and games. The reality had scared the girl.

That had helped to form the drift between them. Petunia was scared that Lily was bringing danger to their family. In truth it was one of Lily's biggest fears. She knew that she had a chance if the Death Eaters came after her. But her father, Petunia and Pa Evans they wouldn't be able to fight back. They would be killed instantly.

But that fear had helped to change and shape Lily. She had grown up quicker than maybe she would have under other circumstances. She was older than her years which was something that made Petunia uncomfortable. Then there was the relationship she had with her friends. Petunia had also witnessed that. There was a bond, a closeness with them that Lily had once shared with Petunia. They were her family in all the ways that really mattered. She knew that she would do anything to help her friends. This feeling had left Petunia in some ways feeling as if she wasn't what Lily needed or wanted.

Lily wished that she could change that. But it was impossible. The truth was that she belonged in the wizarding world and had made a family for herself there. It was a world that Petunia didn't belong too. That was the biggest difference. Because as much as Lily hated to admit it she didn't belong to the muggle world. She and Petunia were too different people, it didn't matter that they were sisters there were too many differences.

But Lily knew that if the circumstances were reversed she would still want Petunia at her wedding. She would want her sister there to see the most important day so far in her life. But Petunia didn't want Lily there. That hurt her in a way that she couldn't put to words.

Closing the letter again Lily shut her eyes. How could she make everyone happy? She had an impossible choice. And she only had five days to make it.

* * *

I'm really sorry its been longer than I promised for the update. No excuses at all I just haven't had time. So sorry

Kris xx


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Alice had never expected the thirteenth of October to be an easy day for her. It was a date that she had been dreading with every breath. However she was determined that she wouldn't break down. So far she had managed that perfectly well.

She was lucky in some ways that the date fell on the Wednesday. It meant that she was able to hide away quite a bit. She didn't want to do that but she felt being around people might not be the most helpful. Her first lesson of the day was Charms which was at 10.15. That meant that she was able to skip breakfast really easily.

It also meant that she had longer to get ready. She had to think carefully as she got ready for the day ahead. She took a hot shower and straightened her hair. Then she simple dressed in her uniform and looked at her makeup case. It had been almost three years since she had gone without makeup. Yet she couldn't put it on.

Alice sat silently through her charms lesson next to James. The boy didn't try to speak to her as they faced the front of class. She wished that she was able to force the Hufflepuff students to stop staring at her. She knew that they were remembering Aaron, her brother, who had once been their star seeker.

Following charms Alice had been forced to sit through an hour of Defence Against the Dark Arts. She usually enjoyed the class but today it brought nothing but bad memories for her. She had tried to block out the memory of discovery but being faced to sit in that room it was difficult.

She had been in Hogsmeade, in Carina's café with Joe and Frank. They had been trying to get Joe's mind off the loss of his mother. It had only been five days since she had disappeared. The three had been joined by Sirius and Amanda and they had been talking about death and it was all rather depressing really.

Then Ddraig had walked in. Something about him had been strange and it hadn't felt right. He had pulled Alice to her feet without speaking but with protests raised from the others came around. She remembered somebody had questioned if he were a Death Eater. Then Frank had been with her and Ddraig had spoken the words that still haunted her.

"_This morning there was another Death Eater attack. I'm afraid that he went after your family."_

She didn't hold Ddraig responsible but he had been the one to bring her the news. Today was hard enough without having to look into his face and be reminded how different a year could be. Alice was thankful when the bell sounded for lunch. She didn't go to the Great Hall though. She headed back to her dorm room.

She was thankful when Branwen arrived with sandwiches for her. The Welsh girl though didn't stay. It must have been really clear that Alice wanted her own space. She had remained in the room until 3.15 when she had to go to Transfiguration.

Lily had sat with her all the way through that lesson. Again nothing was said. When the bell sounded again she went back to the dorm room. She crawled into her bed and closed her eyes. When it was time for dinner she refused to move. She didn't want to face more people than she had to. Instead she pulled out a piece of parchment and wrote a long letter to Frank.

It had been about seven when Branwen had appeared with a tray of food. Alice just smiled as the girl left it at the foot of her bed before leaving. As she got to the door though Branwen stopped.

"You know if you want to speak to us we're just in the common room."

Alice merely nodded as she devoured the food. Then she changed into pyjamas and crawled under her blankets. It was barely eight o'clock but she didn't care. She had fought all day to try and forget the bad and think of the good.

It was something that she had been doing for over a year. Joe had once told her that you couldn't stop living because somebody you loved was gone. You had to keep going. It was alright to do that. She knew that she had the memories of her family to keep her going.

She was a strong character. She barely cried and just got on with things. But this time Alice couldn't hold it in. Dropping her head onto her pillow she cried. She cried for everything she had lost. She cried long into the evening until her tears sent her to sleep.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Remus was getting over the feeling of the full moon. He hated the days leading up to it but he also found the first few days after it just as difficult. The full moon had been on the Friday night and it had taken him until that morning (the Thursday) to feel normal again.

He had spent the day trying to pay attention in his lessons. But for some reason he wasn't concentrating as well as normal. Remus hated this feeling. He worked hard in lessons to ensure that he understood all the topics and got the work done. He worked twice as hard when it was close to the moon.

He had always wanted to prove that he belonged in the school. He knew that he had a good memory which was an advantage when it came to the lessons. He also had good friends who were willing to help him if he ever fell behind because of his condition.

Yes today had been difficult. He didn't have a very busy Thursday. His option choice made the day light. So he spent nine till ten in Herbology and then hadn't had another lesson until charms at one. After two he had been free again until Arithmancy at four-fifteen.

He knew that he was lucky for his easy schedule. He had only missed the Friday due to the full moon but the days leading up to it and those following had been difficult. So the day provided him with the time he needed to work on essays and assignments that he hadn't completed.

Although that had been his plan it hadn't really worked out that way. Remus had always considered himself to be a serious yet shy person. He didn't find it easy to speak to people he didn't know well. He much preferred to be on his own or with his closest friends.

Yet for some reason he had always drawn attention from people. It was strange to him. He had accepted it a long time ago though. He supposed it had something to do with the company that he kept. It wasn't as if he had chosen to surround himself with people who tended to be wall flowers.

James and Sirius were two of the most popular people in the school. He had watched over the years at the way that girls and boys watched them. He knew that most of the girls had hoped that they would be noticed and lucky enough to be their girlfriends while the boys tended to want to be like them.

Remus couldn't decide if it was due to their athletic ability (they were both noted to be excellent Quidditch players) or their lack of appreciation for rules and regulations. They were known to be pranksters and trouble makers and people loved that. He knew that they were considered to be good looking guys and they just got a lot of attention.

But then there was also Peter. Peter was different to the other two. He was quieter and more reserved. Yet there was a lot that people wanted to know about him. In the early days it had to do with the fact that he was the minister's son.

Remus knew that people watched him because they couldn't figure out where he stood in the dynamics of the group. They had heard on more than one occasion whispers of wonderment that he was part of their group. But nobody really knew him the way that they did. Because he was quiet around people they didn't hear the jokes, they didn't see the funny streak that ran through him. They didn't understand his keen understanding of those around him or his quick wit. Peter had always been a fun guy who made them all laugh.

Then there had been Frank. Remus knew that people had respected the boy. He had a sense of right and wrong that was so obvious. He was kind and listened but when you put a broom in his hand he was lethal. He had drawn respect from everyone he spoke to and made people feel at ease.

Then there was Joe. He had been eye candy on the same scale as James and Sirius. He had come across as cool and calm and everyone's friend. He had been able to speak to people from different houses and years without too much trouble (unless it was a girl he liked – which had made him enduring to a lot of people).

Remus didn't think he stood out as well as the boys he was friends with. He didn't even want to go into the girls. He always considered himself to be the odd ball of them all. He didn't have people watching him. He didn't make anyone laugh and have girls wanting to date him. He was just the kind silent one. That's why he couldn't understand the attention.

On this Thursday the attention he was getting really confused him though. He looked up to see a girl look away. He shook his head and went back to copying Branwen's notes for Arithmancy from the Friday's lesson. Within moments he could feel eyes on him again. Looking up the girl once more looked away.

Did he have something on his head? He reached up and patted his hair. He heard a soft giggle and looked back at the girl. She blushed as his eyes connected with hers as she looked back down. Remus looked around the library. They were pretty much on their own so he wouldn't be disrupting anyone. He leaned across the gap from his table to the adjacent one (that she was sat at).

"Is there something wrong?"

She looked up and shook her head. She did it in a quick movement looking back at the table.

"Then why do you keep staring at me?"

"Like you don't know."

He scrunched his nose up and gave a little sigh.

"If I knew I wouldn't be asking would I?"

"But you're Remus Lupin!"

Remus felt even more confused by that statement than ever. Did she mean that he was Remus Lupin the werewolf? She couldn't know that though. What else could she mean though? Maybe just maybe she thought that he would be able to set her up with James. Girls had thought that before. Maybe that was why she was staring.

When he didn't answer she looked back up at him. A puzzled look crossed her features.

"You don't know do you?"

He shook his head slowly. The girl looked a little pained for a moment before she spoke up.

"You're cute."

She turned a little red before looking back at her desk. Remus leaned away back over to his table. What had just happened? He wasn't the cute one. He wasn't the guy the girls went after. She must have been mistaken.

But as Remus sat there he wondered. The guys had always told him that they weren't the reason he got attention. He hadn't believed that though. He was the quiet one that observed the goings on around him. Girls didn't think he was cute they believed he was thoughtful. But then there had been one girl that had thought more of him.

Shaking his head he went back to his notes.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Lily picked the dress up and held it against her body. It was pretty but maybe it wasn't perfect. The soft turquoise was pretty against her skin but it looked a little summery for an October day. The small spaghetti straps and big bow across the waist was maybe too much. Besides maybe turquoise was the wrong colour.

She dropped it back onto her bed and picked up the next dress. This one was prettier than the first. It was a small black Grecian stilled bandeau dress. But black was a little depressing and it did tend to make her look paler than she was. With a sigh that one dropped onto the bed.

Why did she only have two dresses? She knew that back at home she had about twenty dresses in her wardrobe. Would she have time to go there and pick out a dress and make it to the ceremony in time? Well yes. But if she went to the house she was likely to bump into Petunia. And since her sister didn't want her at the wedding maybe that wasn't a good idea.

It was Saturday October sixteenth and Petunia Evans was marrying Vernon Dursley. Lily had only decided the night before that she would go to the wedding. She appreciated the fact that Petunia didn't want her there so she was planning on sitting in the back row of the church. She would stay away from the photos and then see Pa Evans and her father at the reception. Then she would make her excuses so that she wouldn't have to stay.

That was her plan. But she needed to have a dress. She cursed herself for not thinking about it sooner. She also cursed the fact that her sister had chosen an eleven o'clock slot for the wedding. If her sister had gone for an afternoon wedding Lily would have time to go to a shop and buy a dress. But considering the fact that it was now ten o'clock she wouldn't be able to.

Luckily Lily had gotten up early. She had curled her hair into a simple style and pinned it up so that it was off her back. Then she had put on a natural make-up look before thinking of the dress.

Lily looked around the room. It was silent as the others had left. Branwen and Amanda were at another Quidditch practice and Alice was with Remus and Peter playing cards or something. With another look around she headed over to Branwen's wardrobe. Opening it she looked inside to see if the other girl had a suitable dress.

Branwen's selection looked as enticing as her own. There were only two dresses in there. Branwen had a black dress that had a slinky look to it. The only other dress was grey and looked a bit like a sack. She knew that it was bubbled but Lily knew instantly that it wouldn't suit her body type.

With a sigh she closed that one. Branwen needed some new dresses as well. Lily risked another look around before opening Amanda's wardrobe. She knew that she was several inches taller than her friend but with a quick spell she could make the dress long enough for her and then change it back later.

With a smile she noted that Amanda had four or five dresses. This was better. The first dress that Lily pulled out surprised her. It was almost identical to her little black dress. Only it was a deep purple. She put it against her body and looked in the mirror. It was pretty and could have worked. Except for the fact that Petunia's one bridesmaid was going to be in lilac. Lily didn't want to have Petunia argue with her. Purple was off limits for the day.

With a sigh she put the dress back into the wardrobe. Next to it was a black dress. It had a nice cut to it, it was oval down over the neck exposing a little cleavage but not too much. There were folds down the front of the dress but the back was straight with a little bow. It was pretty but black wasn't right for Lily. She wondered for a moment if her friends had brought black dresses for the same reason she had, ready for a funeral.

Putting it back in Lily was shocked that there was a second black dress. This one was clearly meant for a party though. It was tiny. Lily wondered if it would pass Amanda's mid thigh! But it was a lovely black hitch belt dress. It would sit in all the right places making every curve look wonderful. Lily wished that it was in pink or something though.

Lily's mouth dropped a little at the fourth dress she found. It was white which ruled it out straight away. You couldn't wear white to a wedding. But this dress was well Lily was lost for words. It was gorgeous but Lily couldn't imagine having the nerve to wear something like this. Again it was short, maybe as short as the last one. But the neckline! There wasn't one. It cut in small ovals that would just about cover anyone's chest. In fact Lily was sure that if worn everyone would see more or less everything. And the black straps that criss-crossed in the back to tie it up would be the only thing holding it in place. It would be very easy to fall out of this dress!

Amanda's last dress was pink. It was a simple halter neck that due to gems looked like it could be worn at any occasion. This was more to Lily's liking. But again it only came mid-thigh. Lily knew that she would have to make the dress longer to fit her. But if she made it fall longer on her legs she knew that the dress wouldn't look right. She wished that Amanda would consider wearing longer dresses.

Lily was beginning to get desperate. It was quarter past ten now. She really needed something. The way it was going she would be wearing black. With her fingers crossed she moved to Alice's wardrobe. She just hoped there would be something suitable in there.

She noticed that Alice like Amanda had about five dresses. She noticed a black one, a white one, a black and white one, a pink one and then the one that caught her attention. Lily ran to the dorm door and swung it open.

"ALICE!"

She turned back and walked to her friend's wardrobe. She pulled out the coral red dress. She ran her fingers along the satin and knew that this would be perfect. It would fall to the floor in an elegant manner. The waist was pulled in thanks to a sown on strip and the front went all the way up to her neck were it tied. The only skin that would be on show would be her arms and face. It was the most beautiful dress she had ever seen.

"Lily are you okay? Is something wrong? Is that my dress?"

She turned and looked at Alice.

"Can I borrow this please?"

"Why?"

"Petunia is getting married in forty minutes and I haven't got anything suitable."

Her friend studied her for a moment.

"Umm… well okay."

Lily grinned as Alice helped her to change into it. Lily loved the way that the dress felt. She looked up at her friend and smiled.

"I have to ask but what did you buy this dress for?"

Alice blushed a little but smiled.

"Over the summer Carina and Victor wanted to take me and Frank out to a restaurant to celebrate their engagement. It was a really posh place and I didn't know what I should wear so Jacqueline took me shopping. When she saw this she bought it and told me that I had to wear it."

Lily smiled as she looked at herself in the mirror.

"What did Frank think?"

Alice blushed a little more.

"That I should wear red more often."

Lily giggled as she put on a pair of black heels. The dress covered the shoes and made them invisible but she picked up a black handbag to go with it. Then she looked at Alice.

"Do you think I look like I'm going to a wedding?"

"Yep. Just I wouldn't stand too close to your sister until after the ceremony."

"Why not?"

"You might look better than she does."

Lily swatted at her friend as she quickly headed off down into the common room. She would have to get out of the grounds to appariate to the church where the ceremony was being held.

***

Lily arrived at the St. Andrew parish church at ten to eleven. She was a little surprised to see that there were people stood around waiting. She was lucky that she had appeared behind a tree out of view of the church. She walked up to the front of the church and was stopped by a man.

"Hello gorgeous."

Lily hated it when guys talked to her like that. She wasn't an object but a person. She tried to side step him but he stopped her. She looked at him with a small scowl on her face.

"What's the rush babe?"

"Is this Petunia Evans and Vernon Dursley's wedding?"

"Sure is doll face."

This guy was really annoying Lily. She wished that she could hit him with a good hex. But that wasn't allowed. She tried to side step him again.

"Well aren't you going to tell me your name?"

"No!"

He looked shocked and in that second Lily managed to get passed him and into the church. It was quite full which shocked her a little. She spotted towards the front her Aunt Charlene and Uncle Anthony. They had fallen out with Pa Evans a few years earlier and Lily hadn't seen them in years. Oliver and Ginger her cousins were sat next to them. They looked so much older. Lily felt a pang of regret that she had lost them in her life. But that was probably for the best. She knew that her life in the muggle world was coming to an end. Soon she would be a qualified witch and she would be living like one. It was best to stay out of the lives of the muggles that she could.

Looking around the church she recognised a few other people. Some of their neighbours, and Petunia's school friends. There were people that had worked with their father and some with their mother that the family had kept in contact with. But Lily felt very much on her own at the back of the church.

She wondered which of the people there were Vernon Dursley's family. She had no idea. She recognised the man though. He was stood at the front of the church. He was as massive as she remembered. He was dressed in a black tux with a small bow that was hidden beneath his many chins. Lily couldn't help but wonder what Petunia saw in him, he was her complete opposite.

"You should be at the front of the church."

Lily turned at the voice and smiled happily. Pa Evans reached his hand towards her but she shook her head.

"Petunia doesn't want me here Pa –"

"Lily –"

"She doesn't Pa and I understand why. So I'm just going to sit at the back out of the way. You should go up to the front though."

He gave her a look before attempting to shuffle in next to her.

"Pa you can't sit up here. What if dad needs your help during the service?"

He gave her a small smile.

"Alright. But after the wedding you are going to stand next to me and smile happily."

She gave him a little nod and watched as he headed down the aisle towards the front. She loved her Pa so much and it hurt her to hide so much from him. He didn't understand the separation she felt to her family. He didn't know what she really was. But he loved her and she loved him. She would give him a tight hug before she left to go back to Hogwarts.

Her thoughts were interrupted as the wedding march started. People around her stood up. She followed them to her feet. She watched as her father passed within inches of her. She noticed how pale he looked instantly. It was clear that Petunia was supporting him down the aisle not the other way round. Her heart skipped a beat at that.

She knew that if he had been in good health he would have looked dashing in his suit. It was identical to the one that Vernon wore only about ten times smaller. He had lost so much weight thanks to the cancer that he was fragile looking.

As Lily worried about that she managed to catch a glimpse at her sister. She knew that the day was about her. And she had to admit that Petunia had never looked as beautiful as she did right then. The worry for her father was clear in her eyes, Lily knew that look to well. But to everyone else she would look like the perfect nervous bride.

As Lily looked at the dress her mouth dropped open. Thank Merlin she didn't wear her black dress, or Amanda's purple one. Petunia was wearing a white Grecian chiffon strapless dress. She was beautiful in it. The dress clung to her curves and Lily knew that all eyes would be on her. Lily was startled that her sister had opted not to wear a veil but her hair was pulled up into a high knotted bun that made her look elegant. Lily felt as if she were looking at her mother.

Lily sat down and watched the service in silence. Her sister was glowing and Lily knew that whatever had attracted her to Vernon Dursley was true. She had never seen her sister so happy. She was thankful that she had made the decision to attend the wedding.

***

The service had been beautiful. Petunia's voice had been soft and filled with emotion as she had spoken her vows. To Lily's surprise so had Vernon's. It was the first hint Lily had ever seen for how much the two loved each other. The way they looked at each other reminded Lily of her friends. It could easily have been Frank and Alice looking at each other. She was sure in that moment that this was a marriage that was meant to happen.

As Vernon leaned in and took Petunia's lips people around Lily started clapping happily. Lily joined in with a massive smile on her face. Her sister was a married woman! She could hardly believe it. It felt like only yesterday they had been playing on swing sets together. Now Petunia Evans no longer existed but in her place stood Petunia Dursley.

The pair turned towards the witnesses and the smiles they wore brightened the room. This was pure love like Lily had never experienced. Again a strange feeling took over her. She was jealous of Petunia. The woman in front of her had found the man that she loved and just committed to a lifetime with him. The only other time Lily had felt this way towards her sister had been because of her long term absence from her family. She felt that Petunia had gained a lot more than she realised by never been accepted to Hogwarts.

Slowly the couple began to walk out of the church. They waved to some people as they passed but they clung to each other as if nothing would ever tear them apart. As they passed Lily she felt a wave of their happiness hit her. She was shocked by that. The single bridesmaid, the large Marge, then passed with the best man. For the first time Lily noticed the woman. Petunia was most certainly the best looking person in the wedding party.

As they passed the next two people were her father and Pa Evans. Lily looked at them. They wore identical tuxes and to her eyes seemed extremely handsome. Pa was clearly supporting her father towards the door. But as they drew closer the older man leaned in and said something to her father. The younger man's eyes moved straight to where she was sitting. She watched as a smile spread up his lips. He extended his hand and she knew there was no way she could reject it.

To the surprise of people around her, and those following the two men, she stood up. In one quick step she was the other side of her father.

"You look stunning Lily."

"Thank you dad. I borrowed the dress from Alice."

"It suits you."

She smiled happily as she took his hand. The three of them walked out of the church. Lily wondered where they were taking her. She needed somewhere that she could use magic. She needed somewhere where nobody would be watching her. She needed to get away without Petunia ever seeing her.

"I can't believe how beautiful and grown up my two little girls look today."

There was a wisp of something in his voice. They had stopped by a couple of cars. Lily turned and wrapped her arms around her father. She couldn't believe that she was now almost the same height as him. She felt grown up and that was strange.

"I'll always be your little girl daddy."

She kissed his cheek as he patted her back.

"But you're all grown up. Look at you, you're beautiful. Some man will be trying to steal your heart away."

She gave him a soft smile. His eyes though were locked on hers.

"Or has that James Potter already stolen it?"

"Daddy!"

She felt her mouth drop open. He was grinning happily and there was soft laughter floating around them. Pa Evans though looked between them.

"Who's this James Potter?"

"He's my friend Pa."

"He's actually her admirer. She told me that before she headed off back to school."

"Daddy!"

"I think you're embarrassing her Dudley."

"I thought that was my job."

"It is son. Now why haven't I ever heard of this James Potter before?"

Lily stood there in complete shock. She didn't know what to say. But her father still smiling looked at his father.

"I told her that maybe she should stay home this year because of things that are happening up in her school. And you know she told me that if that was the case we'd have to get use to James Potter camping on our doorstep. But you know I think that Lily would like that. Don't you?"

"Well the colour she's turning is starting to match her dress son. So I think maybe we've just found out the name of the next man to join the Evans family."

"DADDY! PA! Stop it!"

The two men were laughing now. But although she was burning red she couldn't help but join in. It felt nice to be stood with them being teased. All the tensions of the last few months together were fading away. Her father's illness was being put aside so that they could have a good time together.

"So why didn't you bring him as a date to the wedding then?"

Lily looked at her father and gave a soft little smile.

"Our house has a very important game coming up and James is the team captain. He's training today. Apparently he's being really tough to the team. Branwen and Amanda have complained a few times. He's got them training three nights a week."

"He's an athlete? What sport does he play?"

Lily looked at her father with wide eyes. Pa had asked the question but he had no idea of the implications. Her father seemed to notice the worry and worked out that it was something that Pa wouldn't understand. Lily though turned to Pa with a smile.

"It's a strange game that was invented in the school. There are three hoops that a player called the keeper has to protect. In our team that's Sirius, one of my friends. Then there are three chasers who have the main ball. They have to try and get the ball through the hoop to score. That's what Amanda, James and Jackie do. Then there are two beaters who use baseball bats and smaller balls to try and hit the main ball out of the opposing chasers hands so that their own can get it. That's what Branwen and Kat do. Then there is a seeker who has to try and catch this miniature ball that is controlled by some sort of electrical charge and zooms around the place. It's really difficult and you need to be really skilled to catch this ball. Our seeker is new his name is Randell and he's never played a game before so that's why there are so many practices."

"What's wrong with football or Rugby?"

Lily shrugged at her grandfather. He shook his head but the conversation ended there. Petunia and Vernon came round a corner of the church with a photographer. Lily realised that they must have been around the back of the church for some private photos. As they drew close Lily saw her sister's eyes expand as she spotted her. But she was cool and collective and didn't make a scene.

The new married couple came over towards them. Lily realised that there were a man and woman stood next to them talking to the bridesmaid and best man. Suddenly it dawned on her that they were Vernon's parents. The two stopped between them. Vernon looked towards Lily and his brows creased.

"Who are you? You're not part of the wedding party."

"Vernon that's my sister Lily."

"Your sister! I thought she couldn't make the wedding."

"So did I."

The groom gave Lily a strange look before he smiled.

"Well it's nice to finally meet you. I was beginning to think that Dudley had made you up."

Lily just gave a small little nod. He didn't seem to feel the tension that was situated between the sisters. He just carried on.

"Okay so we're going to go to the park for our photos. So mum, dad, Marge and Jack if you go in one car, then Dudley, John and Lily can go in another and Petunia and I will go together."

He reached his hand out towards Petunia but she didn't make a move. Dudley looked between his two daughters and gave a small sigh.

"Look at this. My two gorgeous daughters together with me for something good. Nothing sad today."

Petunia looked at her father and then at Lily.

"It is good to all be together again. I'll get Jimmy the photographer to take one of just the four of us and we can take it to the hospital when you go for your checkups so that there's always a reminder of us together happy."

Dudley was still watching the two girls. Lily moved towards her sister and opened her arms. The pair embraced as if they were excited to see each other again. Lily held tightly to her sister in that moment. As they pulled apart she smiled at Petunia gently.

"Tuney you do look amazing today. When you came down that aisle I thought for a moment that you were mum."

She could see the tears start to brim in Petunia's eyes.

"Thank you Lily."

***

Lily felt strange sitting at a round table next to Pa Evans at the reception. Today had been the strangest day ever. She knew that Petunia hadn't wanted her at the wedding but she had come for her father's sake. It was the right choice. Petunia seemed to understand that and was happy enough to let it slide.

Something had occurred between the two sisters. Maybe it was realising that this could be the last time that they would all be together as a family happy. Or possibly it had been Lily's remark of their mother. But the tension that had been there had evaporated away and Lily could happily partake in her sister's special day.

They had just had a wonderful meal and now the speeches were starting. Petunia looked amazing sat at the top table. Everyone was smiling and happily chatting. It was undoubtedly a day of happiness and hope.

Lily watched as Vernon tapped his glass and stood up.

"Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen - First, I'd like to inform you that my bride has vetted this speech, so if you consider any of the material inappropriate, it's her fault."

Lily couldn't help the giggle that slipped through her lips and was glad to know that she wasn't the only one to react that way.

"I'd like to take this moment to point out my fabulous bride. Not only is she beautiful, intelligent and charming she's also the love of my life. I feel incredibly blessed that I found her and that she saw something that attracted her to me. Although I'm still waiting to find out what that was!"

"I want to take this opportunity to thank everybody that has been involved in making today so special. My bride for turning up and not leaving me at the church looking a fool. Dudley for supporting Petunia and being so gracious in allowing me to marry her. John for all the help you provided through this difficult time for us all. To my mum and dad for not only being so understanding but in also helping to pay for the thing."

He took a deep breath and pointed to the man near him on the table.

"I have to thank Jack for standing there with me this morning and for not losing the rings. Petunia would have killed you! And my sister Marge who looks stunning for being an excellent bridesmaid. I'd also like to thank each and every one of you for attending today and helping make our special day even better."

"Now I would just like to say in all seriousness that I know that there are worries for the future. But I want to promise everyone here that no matter what happens I will always love Petunia. I will do everything in my power to make her happy. And the difficult times that we all know will follow will only strengthen us."

"With that I would like to introduce a man who when I first met him terrified me. My father in law Dudley Evans."

Lily held her breath as her father stood up. He looked so small after Vernon. But the smile on his face was so warm that it was hard to worry about him.

"Thank you Vernon and may I formally welcome you to our family. I am so happy that Petunia has found somebody worthy to spend her life with. As a father I have often worried about what will happen to my daughters. As any father with a daughter will know the thought of boys is terrifying. Will they find someone that you will approve of or that you'll hate? But Vernon you are a man that I know will make my Tuney happy and that I will never have to worry will break her heart."

Vernon gave a little nod towards Dudley. Lily watched as her father smiled at Petunia.

"Tuney darling you have always been so beautiful. It's a beauty that some people haven't been able to appreciate but it is clear that Vernon can see it. I love you so much darling. And today you really do look like your mother. And I know that she always looked forward to this day. And I know that she's watching this from wherever she is and that she's proud of you. You've grown into a wonderful woman who is so generous and loving. And I only hope that you continue to grow in such ways. When you start your own family you'll realise how much love is possible for a parent and then you'll understand how difficult it is to give away a child. But I know that I'm not giving you away instead I'm gaining a son."

"Vernon is right there are going to be difficulties ahead of you. Some of them you've already faced. But I know that the pair of you are strong enough to face them together. I'm just thankful that I was able to be here today. I never thought that I would make it to your wedding and I'm grateful that I got to see one of my little girls take this step. I will always love you Petunia and you deserve this happiness."

"So I would like everyone to raise a toast to the happy couple. To my daughter and son in law. Petunia and Vernon."

Lily couldn't help the tears that were running down her face. Her father meant so much to her and it hurt her that he knew that he would never get to make a speech at her wedding. She raised her glass along with those around her and spoke the two names.

***

Vernon led Petunia up to the dance floor. Lily sat next to Pa Evans and watched as Vernon took Petunia into his arms. Music started up and a small smile came to her lips. It had been a long time since she had really listened to muggle music but she couldn't mistake this song. Barry White's soulful voice echoed through the room as the words to 'You're the first, the last, my everything' played.

The two danced as if they were one. They were complete opposites Lily could see that from their appearances. Yet there was something deep and meaningful between them. Lily had seen glimpses of love like this in the past. She had seen it between her parents. She had witnessed something this strong between Alice and Frank and even between Amanda and Sirius. Yet she had never felt it. She felt empty because of that thought. She hoped that one day she would have a man look at her the way that Vernon did. That she would know love like that.

The song ended and Petunia pulled out of Vernon's arms. She turned and found the man she was looking for. Lily watched as her father took Petunia's arms. Vernon had found his mother and had pulled her up to the dance floor.

"Lily darling would you honour me with your first dance?"

Lily smiled at her Pa.

"I'd love too."

Lily followed him up among the dancers. The second song on the night started up and Lily smiled. It was a song that she had heard so many times through the walls of the house in the summer from Petunia's room. The song 'If' by Bread.

Pa Evans held Lily gently and the pair moved around the floor. She smiled as she looked at him. She noticed something in his face though.

"Lily you are a beautiful girl do you know that?"

"Thank you Pa."

"You're prettier than your sister."

"PA!"

The man chuckled.

"Petunia is a pretty girl and she's the image of your mother but as far as I'm concerned you are beautiful. You're the image of your grandmother."

Lily tilted her head a little.

"Pardon?"

"You never met your grandmother Stephanie. She died the year before Petunia was born. She was the love of my life. There was never a woman more beautiful than her in my eyes. She had long flowing red hair that she use to curl and her eyes. Well your father got them from her and so did you. Every time I see you I see her. And that is why I think you are the most beautiful girl in the entire world."

Lily smiled gently.

"I wish I had known her."

"She would have loved you."

Lily kissed her Pa's cheek and smiled. She gently rested her head on his shoulder as they continued to move to the song.

"I'm glad that you listened to me and came down for the day."

"Me too."

"It's made your fathers day having the two of you together."

Lily could feel tears welling up in her eyes at that.

"How is he?"

"He's fighting but it's a losing battle."

The song came to an end. Lily pulled her head up and tried to smile. Pa brushed a stray strand of hair from her cheek.

"Don't be upset. Be glad that you have today with him."

They were interrupted at this point. Petunia took Pa's hand to lead him to dance. Lily looked up as her father offered her his hand. She smiled as she took it. 'Love me Tender' by Elvis started up and she smiled at her father.

"I'm glad you could make it today Lily."

"Me too."

"How'd you get here?"

"I'm seventeen dad. It means that I can use magic outside of school."

She had whispered the word magic so that only her father would be able to hear it. He gave her a soft smile.

"And you're able to travel using that?"

"Yes. It's called apparition. I passed my test in July. It was how I managed to meet up with everyone over the summer."

He gave a little nod and a smile.

"How is school going?"

"Really well. The first day was hard; it was the anniversary of Ginny's death. But it's getting better. Alice is a little upset because Frank graduated last year. She's missing him like mad. And you know what. I think Branwen misses Joe. He graduated last year as well, and they're not dating exactly but I think she wishes they are."

He gave a little smile and Lily continued.

"And Sirius and Amanda are unbearable. They are completely in love with each other. But it's quite funny because they're too scared to actually tell each other that. But they hardly leave each others company anymore. And Remus is so funny to watch. He's just realised that he's been getting attention from girls for years and that it's because he's handsome."

Lily laughed at the thought. Her father though looked thoughtful.

"And what about James Potter?"

Lily bit her lip lightly.

"He's more mature than I've ever seen him. He's the Head Boy and the Quidditch captain and he's taken on the responsibility. And he's quite attractive…"

Her father laughed at this.

"So has he asked you out yet?"

Lily shook her head.

"He's not going to either."

"Any why not? I thought you said he liked you."

"We had an argument last year and he promised that he'll never ask me out again. And you know what I wish he would. I'd say yes this time."

She blushed as she said it. Her father tilted her head up to look at him.

"You know its okay for a girl to make the first move."

She laughed as the song ended…

* * *

Wow okay this chapter took forever to write (3 days!) and it's a bit all over the place. Originally I was going to have Lily miss the wedding and mention it in passing. But I wanted to have another chapter with her father before one that is coming up for Christmas. I wanted to have her father having a knowledge of her relationship starting out with James and this seemed like a good way.

So I hope you liked it anyway. And now back to Hogwarts.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Sirius rolled over as the alarm sounded. He hated six am with a passion. It was a time of day he felt had no right to exist in the world. And yet there was his alarm screaming at him to get up. Reaching over he whacked it hoping that it would shut up and he could turn back over and re-find that dream.

"I'll throw cold water over you if I have to."

Although James' voice was a whisper it held a threat to it. Sirius made a wincing sound as he threw the blankets off and stood up. The cold morning air hit his bare legs.

"Couldn't you let me off for one day?"

"Nope mate. Come on it'll be worth it when we beat the Slytherins."

Sirius highly doubted that. But still he threw on a pair of trousers and a top and followed his friend out of the dorm room.

"You do realise you're suppose to be nice to someone on their birthday right."

"You don't class your birthday as having started until after you've had breakfast. That means I've got two hours before I'm forced to be nice."

The teasing was clear to tell and Sirius couldn't help the small laugh. It was a true statement. He had claimed many a time that nobody should be cheerful until after breakfasts and birthdays weren't an exception.

As he reached the bottom step into the common room he felt strange. He'd known that this day was coming up and yet it was strange to realise that now he was eighteen. Today would be the last birthday he would get to celebrate in Hogwarts. Not that there would be much celebrating.

Next year though. Oh he had plans for next year. He would host a party in the house. There would be lots of food, drink and music. They'd laugh and have so much fun. And it would be great because everyone would be able to attend. He wouldn't have to go to lessons and if he was working, maybe he'd be able to book it off!

"Morning everyone. Sorry we're a little late. Somebody couldn't get up again this morning."

Sirius shot a scowl in the direction of James. But the Captain of their team seemed to be ignorant of it. He was stood around a small group of people all looking as if they hated the idea of six am as much as Sirius did.

"So today we're going to focus on our strengths. I want the beaters to have one Bludger between them. One of you is going to be on the attack and the other the defence. Then you swap. Randell you're going to practice your flying skills. What I mean by that is I want you to be diving and dodging around the rest of us. No looking for the snitch today. Chasers we're going to work on the new plays and Sirius it's your job to stop us. Everyone understand? Good. Now let's get down to that pitch then. We have until eight o'clock then Kat, Jackie and Randell you need to get changed and have breakfast for your first lessons. Right. Let's go."

James was really starting to annoy Sirius with his instructions. The boy was really getting into the role of Captain and Head Boy. Sirius didn't really pay much attention to the most of it, but when it disrupted his sleep then he got annoyed.

Sirius wondered if maybe he could sneak back to bed. He didn't want to be playing Quidditch at six in the morning. No other team was being made to do so and they'd never done it before. Besides it was his birthday and even if he didn't consider it as having started until after breakfast that didn't mean he didn't want to take it easy.

"You can always go back to bed at eight Si."

The surprise of having a girlfriend able to read his mind should have worn off but it still shocked Sirius when Amanda did that sort of thing. She smiled as she waited by the portrait for him to follow the rest of the team out.

As he drew level with her she reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck. The smile she gave him caught his breath as she leaned up taking his lips. The world around him melted away as he wrapped his arms around her drawing her closer. Her kisses were light and teasing but very quickly they changed. There was something strong and passionate about the pair of them. What could have been seconds, minutes or even hours ended as the girl tried to pull free. Sirius didn't want to stop but he relented.

"He'll give us detention if we don't get down there now."

Hand in hand they ran through the deserted corridors and out into the grounds for practice.

***

Practice hadn't been as bad as Sirius had anticipated it to be. The truth was that Quidditch always left him with a feeling of euphoria. He couldn't imagine anything that would give him the same sort of buzz and had to admit that it was a decent way to start his birthday off.

At eight James had called the session to an end. There seemed to be a mutter of disappointment in the air. Sirius realised that his team mates would happily spend the entire day in the air. It didn't matter that there were large grey clouds overhead and a strong cold breeze. They were all joined by this passion and it was always sour when it was over.

But they had to finish. The three younger team members, Jackie, Kat and Randell had lessons starting at nine. As it was they rushed to the changing rooms to change and head for breakfast. The door slammed shut as Randell bid them farewell and ran up towards the school.

Sirius and James though paid little attention. They were in no rush. The seventh years had the first period on a Wednesday off. He wondered if Branwen and Amanda were taking things as slowly in the next changing room. He half hoped so; he was planning on having Amanda waiting for him to walk back to the school.

"So do you think you'll hear from your parents today then?"

James' question had caught Sirius off guard. They had been discussing the tactics that they thought the Slytherins might try out on them. Although jumping from Slytherin to his family wasn't that big a leap it still surprised him. His family was a topic that had been off limits for a very long time. In fact he couldn't remember the last time he had heard from them.

"I doubt it somehow. They didn't contact me on my seventeenth and that's a far more important birthday than eighteen."

"Yes but you couldn't get married then."

Sirius looked up at his friend.

"Technically James we can get married when we turn seventeen. We're adults, although it would be rather difficult. Could you imagine trying to explain to McGonagall why you should be allowed to bunk with a girl? Could be fun, maybe we should try after Christmas."

"I'm being serious Padfoot."

"Really James I doubt they'll even think of me."

James was sat on the bench and Sirius plopped down next to him. They were silent for a moment before the younger boy spoke up.

"All your cousins married straight out of Hogwarts didn't they?"

"Yeah because they wanted to."

James shot him a look and Sirius shook his head.

"Look I know what you're getting at but really I haven't heard from anyone other than my brother in about two years. Somehow I think that maybe my mother has decided finally to admit defeat and disown me from the Black family. Which isn't such a bad thing."

James' look said everything.

"But they did have someone they wanted you to marry right?"

Sirius barked a laugh shaking his head slowly.

"They've never come clean and told me that they have. But it's pretty clear that there is a candidate that they picked out a long time ago. Although my guess is that her mother won't be trying to force her into a marriage anymore. I think she'll have realised that it's pointless even if my parents haven't."

"Who?"

Sirius smiled as a memory from what felt like a lifetime ago ran through his mind. He had been sat in the back of a potion class in his fourth year when their then Professor, Malfoy, had used a spell to demonstrate why it was best to know if someone was interested before using a love potion. The words still rang through his ear sometimes in his dreams.

"_My destiny is to unite the family of Dixon to that of Black. I have no say in it and must not have any other relationships as it is forbidden."_

It had been a surprise to him in that moment. He had never thought for one moment that it would be his destiny to marry Amanda to join their families together. It was something he found funny now. He had fallen in love with the girl that his parents had decided back when he was a kid that he would marry.

Of course it hadn't been as clear cut as Amanda had stated it. She had dated guys and he'd had one or two dates of his own. But they had chosen each other now. The fact it was their parents wishes didn't matter to either of them.

Shaking his head he looked back at James.

"Amanda of course. Or don't you remember that conversation back in fourth year?"

It took a couple of seconds but then understanding crossed the others face and he laughed.

"Oh yeah I was really pissed with you for that wasn't I? It was about the time when I really fancied her that she made that announcement in potions. Wow that's seems like a lifetime ago."

The two nodded at each other. Sirius though looked at James closely then.

"It doesn't bother you at all does it? That I'm dating your ex-girlfriend?"

"Sirius you and Amanda are made for each other. Everyone can see that. I was a passing stage that was all. Besides it's not as if we would have lasted. I love Amanda to pieces don't get me wrong she's one of my best friends. But I never felt anywhere near as much for her as I do for Lily."

"You need to make a move there mate."

James pulled a face and Sirius just shock his head. His friend was able to be stubborn when he wanted to be.

***

"So what's the plan for tonight then?"

Sirius was too busy munching on his bacon sandwich to answer the question. Peter though was patient enough to wait. But Sirius just shrugged as he took another bite. Quidditch always left him hungry. He wasn't going to waste eating time by talking.

There was a soft laugh from across the table. Amanda lowered her apple and nudged Peter.

"I think you'd better leave questions until after the food is gone. Otherwise he'll just be in a bad mood for the entire day and I for one don't want to have to listen to the whines of 'I missed breakfast because of James and his stupid practices' for another day."

She laughed again taking a bite of her apple. He narrowed one eye at her knowing that she was right with her comments though. Breakfast would disappear at nine o'clock and because of practice and then the conversation with James he hadn't gotten to the hall until eight thirty.

Amanda and Branwen had gotten there before them but were still happily eating omelettes and fruit. James was in the middle of swallowing a fry up while the rest watched. It was annoying to have four sets of eyes watching him eat but then that wouldn't stop him. The low buzz of a secret conversation between the girls tickled his ears and he shot them a look. But he knew that they wouldn't repeat the words loud enough for him to hear. And Peter had turned to Remus talking about some assignment.

Sirius picked up a goblet of coffee and took a mouthful as the sound of wings overhead announced the arrival of the post. A parcel dropped down in front of him. His eyes widened as he reached with his free hand to take it. But before he could a smaller pair of fingers had wrapped around it.

"I'll take that."

He swallowed his mouthful.

"Mand that's mine!"

"It's the presents from Frank and Joe. You can have them tonight with the others."

"What if I want a present now?"

She wiggled a finger at him leaning over the table. He moved so that he was leaning towards her as well. Then with a small smile she kissed his lips. It was a soft light peck unlike the kiss she had offered him earlier.

"You'll just have to be patient."

She grinned as she turned back to the girls. He would have argued his point if it hadn't have been for a familiar looking owl that landed in front of him. His eyes widened as he turned his head towards James. The boy looked a little smug as he indicated that Sirius should take the letter. With shaking hands he took the envelope and ripped it open.

A single gasp left his lips.

"What's wrong?"

All eyes were on him as the food on the table vanished. He shoved the letter in his pocket sharing a brief look with James. Then he turned back to the others trying to make his scowl look real.

"The food just vanished. Damn James and his stupid early morning practices. I'm still hungry!"

***

The day felt like it would never end. The classes just kept coming. But Sirius remained silent. His mind had been on the letter in his pocket all day. How dare his mother send him that. Hadn't he made it clear in the past that he didn't consider himself part of their family. How much clearer did she need it?

He'd refused to return home for three summers now; he hadn't spent any Christmases with them either. He'd clearly implied that his family were his friends even standing with them against his own blood relatives and their friends. Was she insane?

Although he was annoyed he managed to play the part of birthday boy well. He smiled and laughed with his friends. He joked over the gifts they had given to him and even enjoyed the stupid little games they played. The atmosphere that evening seemed light enough and he knew that for the most part they would buy it.

After a few hours though he was going crazy. It was the small looks that Amanda kept giving him. It was clear that she was worried about him. But she seemed content to play her part in the play as well. She leaned against his chest holding the cards for him as he told her which ones to play. She kissed his wrists every now and again as if that was the only way she was able to express the fact that she was there for him.

With a look at James he decided that he couldn't take it anymore.

"Amanda can I have a word please. In private?"

He felt her sit forward as she turned to look at him closely.

"Sure."

He stood up and took her hand in his. Leading her towards the stairs to the dorm he heard the wolf whistles from Remus and Peter. He shot them a look and they laughed. He knew why they were laughing. They had been talking the evening before about what Amanda would give him as a present. Apparently Remus was pretty sure that the girl was going to give him herself.

He was silent as he led her up to the door that led to his dorm room. He peered at the sign above the door and sighed a little. Things had been so much easier when it had said first years. But it would never read that again for him. Those years had slipped away. He had fond memories from them but also troubled ones.

He refused to let go of Amanda's hand as he sat on the edge of his bed. He was surprised when she didn't take the seat next to him. She stood there watching him carefully. There was something in her eyes. Then her fingers were brushing against his cheek.

"Please tell me what is wrong."

He tried to give her a reassuring smile but it was impossible. His voice was small when he spoke.

"I received a letter from my mother this morning."

She took a step closer to him as she cupped his face with her hand.

"Whatever it said we can work through."

He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. Holding her tightly he rested his face against her chest. He felt her hands stoking his hair. Her touch was gentle and comforting. Turning his head slightly he looked towards the post of his bed and made a small sigh.

"Please Sirius I'm really worried."

"My parents have decided that they've put up with my behaviour long enough. It's time I put my family responsibility first."

"You already are."

She leaned a little back and Sirius looked into her face. He felt her lips brush against his. Then her forehead was pressed against his.

"Do you want me to write a colourful letter back to them explaining that you've decided to disown them?"

He chuckled lightly.

"They've booked a church."

"What?"

Her breathe brushed against his lips. He kept his eyes closed as he spoke softly against her mouth.

"They've booked a church on July first for my wedding."

"They want you to get married?"

There was shock in her voice. Her forehead was still pressed against his and he quickly moved his jaw to rid the distance between their mouths. His kiss was longer and fiercer than the small light ones she'd been pressing on him. Her hands moved from his hair wrapping around his neck. His arms still pinned her to his body.

Finally he released her lips and spoke the words softly.

"Just because they want me to get married doesn't mean I will."

"Who is she?"

"You're silly sometimes Mand, do you realise that?"

His lips brushed hers again.

"What are you on about?"

"Now whose destiny is it to unite the family of Dixon with Black?"

Before he could place his lips against hers again she had pulled back. Her eyes were wide as she looked down at him.

"They want us to get married?"

"Don't sound so shocked. You were the one that told me that was the plan."

A small smile spread to her lips as she leaned back towards him. Her lips found his jaw and she kissed up towards his ear. Her breathe tickled as she spoke softly.

"They may have booked the church but until you propose I'm not marrying you."

Her lips were instantly back on his mouth. The gasp that escaped from his lips was the last sound he was able to make. Did that mean she wanted to marry him? Did it mean that she loved him too? Before he could tighten his grip anymore she pulled back and disentangled herself from him. With the smallest of smiles she turned and left the room. With a groan Sirius fell back onto his bed.

* * *

First things first. I'm so sorry for the delay in posting. One of my friends has broken her arm and I've found that my day off is now spent taking her out for the day. So I haven't really had time to get on here. But I hope this chapter makes up for that.

Okay so a little bit of teasing here for you then. I wanted to have Sirius' parents turn up and demand that he married someone. I was going to introduce some competition in the form of Delia for Amanda but I've changed my mind. Instead Sirius has to face the realisation that his family want him to marry the woman he loves and they've even got a church booked.

So what does this lead to? Well if Sirius can pluck up the courage (and nothing goes wrong) maybe there'll be a wedding at the end of this year. Or maybe it will add some pressure and make everything go wrong. We'll have to wait and see where this takes us. I'm really excited to see where the characters lead me on this one.

Kris xx


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Over seven years it was bound to happen. There was a one in seven chance that it would occur and now finally it had. Lily rolled over in bed and peered through the gap in her curtains. She could hear Alice moving around the room quietly as she dressed. Pretending to still be asleep she didn't move.

The door closed and Lily sat up straight. She knew that both Branwen and Amanda would be on the Quidditch pitch. She had heard the two girls complaining about a three hour session this morning. James was really going over the top with the whole training thing in their books.

But Lily thought he was being responsible. He was trying to be as prepared as he could be. That was a good sign of a leader and that's what a captain was. She'd been watching him closely lately and she had to admit that he was no longer a boy.

Shaking her head she tried to dislodge that thought. She had more important things to do today. It was a Sunday and an eventuality that she hadn't really expected. Halloween on the weekend. She had never experienced such a thing in Hogwarts.

As Head Girl she had to help organise the festivities for the evening. In the meeting with the Head master she had been pleasantly surprised. She had expected James to want to throw some big over the top party on the Saturday night going into the Sunday. But he had spoken of keeping with traditions. A simple feast.

Well the idea had been to keep it simple but it wasn't turning out that way. Lily had gone to the kitchens the day before and spoken to the House elves about food. She knew that they would out do themselves and they always made the food so delicious. But she wanted to add some things that James had discussed with Dumbledore.

Sitting up in bed she stretched. She needed to go back to the kitchens this morning with the potions that she had prepared with the aid of Amanda. The pair had worked long and hard the last couple of days to make some silly prank potions. They were going to be poured into pies that would explode at different times. It seemed juvenile to her but it was the one silly thing James had thought of.

Although it was childish she had to admit that it was a part of Halloween. She knew that James had spoken to the boys about spreading some prank material through the hall. Lily knew that in the past she would have used that as an excuse to claim he was acting like a kid. But that wasn't the case now. She could see in his eyes that he wanted to lighten the atmosphere.

Things were getting bad in the outside world. It was difficult to ignore the stories that leaked into the halls through letters home. Attacks were increasing and there was a genuine fearing running through the world. Lily shivered with the thought of it. She still found it almost impossible to believe that there was a war going on.

With a sigh Lily threw on some clothes and headed out of the dorm.

***

A bang rocked through the room. Laughter erupted from the Hufflepuff table as Doug Beetle took a pie to the face. Lily turned with a grin. He was standing up trying to brush off the contents. Suddenly more laughter sounded and Lily chocked on her drink as a long blonde beard sprouted from his chin. He had been hit with the aging potion!

The evening was turning into a success. Throughout the hall laughter was ringing loud as every so often a pie would explode soaking those around them with the potions that Lily and Amanda had made. So far there had been three aging potions, five babbling beverages, one confusion concoction and two hair-raising potions.

There was a relaxed atmosphere that was making everyone feel at ease. It was the thing that they needed to do.

"Brilliant. I wish though we'd made a love potion though. That could have been really fun."

"I told you Amanda we couldn't. That would have caused problems for people."

"A weak one would have been fun."

Lily shot her friend a look.

"And what if it had hit Sirius full in the face?"

"Then he would have started flirting with James and we could both have had a real good laugh."

Lily bit her lip gently and glanced across the table to her right. James was surrounded by the boys laughing and joking. He seemed so at ease. She wished that he would ask her out again all ready. She knew that she had turned him down so many times that he had promised not to ask again but she really wanted to say yes this time.

Amanda leaned in close to her.

"You could always ask him you know."

"What? I have no idea what you're talking about Mand."

The girl raised an eyebrow as further down their table another bang sounded. Alyson Petty screamed as her hair rose on end. Lily chuckled happily glad that things had worked out well.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

It was a strange day. This was the first of many new things for the girl. She knew that the lessons she would be attending this Monday would be no different to any other. She knew that her friends would treat her no differently. But everything was different.

Closing her eyes she heard the professor clear his throat. She didn't open her eyes though.

"Miss Ddraig are you paying attention?"

Slowly she opened one eye and looked at her father. He was stood with his wand in his hand explaining the importance of a being able to raise a shield quickly after firing a spell. It wasn't that she didn't care about the lesson; it wasn't even that she found it dull. It was that her mind was on other things.

November first tended to have this sort of affect on her. And it was worse this year. Today she was eighteen and she knew that her friends were waiting until the end of the day to spoil her. She knew that there would be junk food, games, dancing and presents. She knew that her father had something special that he would give her after the evening meal. But it was the first time since Tad's death that they would be celebrating something.

She missed Tad more than words could explain. He had been more than her grandfather. He had been in many ways a second father to her, a friend that she had trusted with almost everything. He had raised her during her father's years in Hogwarts. She had never felt that her father was doing wrong to leave her to work but she had missed him. Tad had made sure that she was always safe though.

Her memories tended to play tricks on her. She could remember playing house with him and shops. She remembered being five years old and being taught how to play chess and how he had taken her on her first broom ride.

"Branwen!"

Shaking her head she looked at her father.

"Sorry Professor."

He didn't say anything as he carried on with the lesson. She watched him carefully taking everything about him in. He looked so much like Tad had. He had always stood shoulder to shoulder with his father, they had the same brown hair, same build and smile. The only difference were the eyes. Tad's eyes had been a piercing green while her nhad had grey eyes.

She knew that he missed Tad as much as she did. It was difficult for him and she couldn't imagine how much. She had never known her mother had been raised by the two men in her life. She had known and lost people before in her life, they all had. But losing Tad had been different. It had been difficult for her but she knew that losing her nhad would be worse. And he had lost his. She hated the idea of waking up one day and not having someone who knew her so well there.

A prod in her side brought her mind back. Lily was pointing at something on the sheet. Branwen blinked several times before looking back up. Her father's eyes were slanted and she knew that she was in trouble. Trying to smile she spoke with confidence.

"Not everyone is capable of producing a shielding charm."

"Well at least I know one person is paying attention. Well done Miss Evans."

Branwen made a little pout as she looked back down at the sheet that Lily was writing on. She had taken an awful amount of notes. It was clear that her friend was taking this lesson seriously. Branwen knew that it was wise. She had heard her father and Tad talk about this topic before, so it wasn't that new to her.

She realised that there were a number of wizards and witches who were unable to protect themselves against attack with a shielding charm. She thought that it was a waste. She knew how to cast one already. Tad had been adamant after the attack in their home a few years back that she learn. It had been hard but he had been a good teacher.

Branwen did try to pay attention for the remainder of the lesson but her fathers words washed over her. She was surprised when the bell sounded and they were all making their way from the room. Defence was one of only two subjects that all eight of them took together. Monday mornings had become a bit of a favourite for the group because following Defence was Transfiguration, the only other one they all took.

Branwen happily followed the others out of the room. Silently she listened to the chatter. She could see that Sirius and Amanda had their fingers entwined as they walked ahead with James. Lily who was talking to Alice and Remus was watching James carefully and Branwen wondered how long it would take for that to happen.

"Are you okay?"

Branwen turned and looked at Peter. He smiled at her as she gave a little shrug.

"I think so."

"You're missing Tad aren't you?"

She nodded surprised to feel her eyes watering.

"I know it's not the same but I was surprised that I missed my dad on my last birthday. I know he's not dead and that maybe he should be. He wasn't a nice man he hurt me, my mum and so many other people. But he was still my dad. I expected to hear something from him for my seventeenth. But nothing. And even though I hate him I missed him that day."

Again she nodded a little.

"It's the eighteenth anniversary of my mam's death today. Nhad has always found my birthdays a bit bitter sweet. The day he got me he lost my mother for good. Tad was always the one to make everything seem okay. And I keep expecting to see him, to hear his voice. And it hurts so much."

Peter's arm came around her shoulder as they continued walking. She felt him squeeze her against his body slightly.

"I wish I could help, that I could make it better."

"I know. Thanks."

Leaning in Branwen kissed the boys cheek as they entered the room. Most of the seats had already been taken (they had been walking really slowly). Branwen wasn't surprised that Amanda and Sirius were sat together with James; she was surprised that Lily had taken the fourth seat. So she took the seat in the row in front between Alice and Peter. Then the lesson started.

***

Branwen had found Transfiguration almost as difficult as Defence to pay attention to that day. But she had made more of an effort to at least look like she was listening. It hadn't worked too well and she was lucky when Alice had scribbled the answer to a question down for her. Then it hadn't mattered as they had tried to conjure quills from thin air. Branwen had been one of the few who by the end of the lesson hadn't managed it. Which had of course meant more homework for her.

Following that she had headed off with James, Lily and Remus to Ancient Runes. That was her last lesson on a Monday. The afternoon lessons were for subjects she had chosen to drop. She liked Ancient Runes found it to be a relaxing sort of atmosphere to lessons. It was hard work but there was something about it that made it seem more casual.

Maybe it was due to the fact that the class was only eight people. Maybe it was that they were able to talk while they translated things. Or maybe it was because it was something that she had done from a young age as a hobby. Tad had been an expert in Ancient Runes and although Defence Against the Dark Arts had seemed to rule his life for so long he had found Runes fun. He had taught her from a young age how to read Runes and they had translated works together.

Yet when the lesson had finished she had been relieved. As usual on a Monday they met their friends in the Great Hall to have lunch. This day though she noticed straight away that something was different. There were a group of Gryffindors crowded around one section of the table.

A laugh rang through the air and she felt her jaw slacken a little.

"Brilliant!"

James was walking faster towards the table. Branwen was frozen though. She watched as James pushed his way through, everyone moved for him. Then he was slapping palms with Joe. The older boy hadn't changed in two months. Had it really been two months?

Branwen tried to concentrate on breathing. What was he doing here? Her breath was catching as she took him in. He looked great dressed in casual jeans and a sweater. His hair was perfect just the way she remembered it. She felt like she was watching him through a tunnel. She could see Remus stepping forward and talking to him. But still she couldn't move.

He had said in his letters that he was going to come and visit her. She had been expecting him on the anniversary of Alice's family's death. He hadn't been able to come though. She hadn't expected him now until the thirteenth, maybe if he could get the day off work. But here he was.

Lily was talking to him now. And yet she was still about ten feet away. Was he her boyfriend now? Was he here to see her? They had been writing and she had declared that all she wanted to do was throw her arms around him and kiss him. He had told her that he missed her. That he considered her to be his 'sweetheart' and that he wanted a relationship.

Her mind went blank then as he turned and looked at her. His grey eyes sparkled and she couldn't help but smile. It was like slow motion but not quite. Everyone around them seemed to slow down and stop but Joe seemed to almost run the space between them. Then his arms were around her waist as hers went around his neck. Her lips found his easily and she didn't care who was watching as she kissed him fervently.

It seemed like no time had passed when she finally pulled back and looked at him. A smile lit up his face as his eyes opened.

"That was worth the trip here."

His voice was like velvet to her ears.

"What are you doing here though?"

"It's my girlfriend's birthday. There was no way I was going to miss that."

Girlfriend. She loved the way that sounded. She smiled happily as she wrapped her fingers around his.

"Well I'm glad I've got the rest of the day off."

"And me. I thought maybe after you've had some lunch that maybe you'd like to go for a walk around the grounds."

"That depends."

"What on?"

"Will I get to kiss you some more?"

She was grinning as he reached over and brushed a strand of hair off her cheek.

"You can kiss me from now until forever."

"I was thinking just until dinner."

She laughed as he wrapped his arms around her. So today was a day of firsts for her. Her first birthday without Tad and her first birthday with Joe. Somehow it suddenly wasn't feeling as bad as it had earlier.

* * *

Okay so I was stuck with Branwen's birthday. I did the whole Quidditch one for Sirius' and I didn't know where to go with this one. So I thought it could be nice to have Joe turn up. So they're a proper couple now which I think is really sweet. And I've got a few plans for them up my sleeves.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

"…And then I told her that she had charmed the heart right out of me!"

Laughter erupted around them as if what Slughorn had said was the funniest thing ever in the world. Amanda rolled her eyes as she poked her steak with her fork. She wished now that she had found a good excuse to get out of this. She hated the Slug Club. Damn Lily for begging her to come to this thing.

It wasn't that she didn't like Horace Slughorn. He was a decent enough guy. But Amanda hated the way he surrounded himself with the people he thought were going to be important in the wizarding world. It reminded her in ways of Voldemort. He surrounded himself with the strongest he could find. A shiver ran down her spine.

The group had changed in the two years since Slughorn had returned to teaching. The older members had left and had been replaced by younger students with influence in the outside world. There were only a few originals left. Amanda looked around the table.

Lily was sat next to her happily listening to everything that was being said. She looked happy and relaxed as if an evening in the company of Slytherin students didn't affect her at all. Also at the table sat her cousin Severus who every now and then shot her a strange look. They hadn't spoken to each other in months and she noticed how he seemed more withdrawn than ever before.

Next to him sat her brother Adrian. He was carefully keeping his gaze away from her. It was no secret to anyone that animosity sat between the pair. Their family had clearly been cut in half and she was out on her own. Not that she really cared that much. Although she would admit that things were slightly better with her mother. She had received a letter a few days after Sirius' birthday informing her that she was not expected to marry her boyfriend on the date that he had been given.

She had actually taken the time to reply to her mother. She had informed her mother that she had no intention of marrying Sirius until he proposed and that she was sure that the July date would be wasted. It was strange writing home. It had been so long since there had been any contact. But it was clear that her mother regretted the choices she had made in her own life. Amanda didn't want to punish her for not seeing what was under her nose. She realised now that her mother would never have a significant role in her life but she had never done anything to actually harm her.

Regulus was slightly along from Adrian. The boy was changing and Amanda was amazed by how much like Sirius he was starting to look. He was losing the childish roundness of his face and becoming a man. He gave her a soft smile which was almost identical to his brothers. It was a smile she knew he didn't wear often. But if he did he would have every girl in the school swooning.

Sitting next to Slughorn was Rabastan Lestrange. Amanda hated him more than anyone else in the school. His face was lit with a smirk as he nodded along to whatever it was that Slughorn was saying.

There were only two other original members in the group a fourth year Hufflepuff called Andrea and a fifth year Ravenclaw Sophia. But the group had gained others. Amanda knew that James had been invited after Slughorn had seen him fly for the first time. However just as with Sirius and Peter he offended the professor and was never invited back. Pity Amanda couldn't seem to upset the man.

But Nott had joined the group along with Purus, Avery and Finn. In fact the entire Slytherin Quidditch team seemed to be a favourite of Slughorns. It wasn't that surprising since they had won him the Quidditch Cup the year before, something they wouldn't be doing again.

There was also Eric Head the Hufflepuff keeper and Matt Fairhead the Ravenclaw keeper. They were both exceptional and there were rumours that they would be joining professional teams within the next two years when they graduated.

"Have I told you that I received a letter from Pullman only two days ago? He's having a wonderful time playing Quidditch professionally. He sent me a lovely gift basket."

Amanda rolled her eyes again. She wished that Joe was here. She missed him. This was only the second meeting she had made this year so far. She had managed to convince James to schedule practices for most of the others. He had been more than willing to help her out. But Slughorn had caught her off guard that morning and she hadn't been able to come up with an excuse (he had already checked the Quidditch practice schedules).

She had considered asking Ddraig to give her a detention. She had even considered cursing somebody in front of Professor McGonagall to get detention. But she hadn't been able to come up with anything good enough before Lily had begged her to come to the party.

Again she stabbed her steak. She had so many other things she could be doing. She could be snuggled up to Sirius right about now. She loved getting to sit next to him and running her fingers up the length of his arm. The small smile that would spread to his lips as she tickled him with the movement.

Or she could be sat with James going over some game plays. They had a game in another six days against the Slytherins. She wanted to make sure that she was ready for this game. It would be her last chance to take on her brother. She wanted to really beat him. She was startled from her thoughts.

"How is the Gryffindor Quidditch team getting on Amanda? You've been practicing a lot this term?"

She looked around at the gathered faces and put a wide smile on.

"We're the best we've ever been. You'd better get ready to say goodbye to the cup professor. You won't be getting to keep it."

He gave a gruff laugh.

"Yes Gryffindor is a great team. But I don't think you'll be able to beat us."

She just smiled as she stabbed her meat again. She glanced at her watch. It was barely eight o'clock. They had at least another two hours of this. She didn't think she could cope.

"I bet you're practicing so much because you know you suck."

Her eyes went up to Lestrange and she raised an eyebrow.

"You realise right that over the last eight years Gryffindor has won the Quidditch Cup seven times whilst Slytherin only won once. And last year we only lost because we weren't full strength due to unforeseen circumstances. You should be scared Lestrange because this, this is the last year. This is our last chance. And you can bet that we're not going to let the Cup slip out of our fingers. And if that means I have to push you off your broom to do it. Well I can live with that."

She shot him her sweetest smile as she leaned forward. She was good at this sort of talk. She had watched her father threaten men in a manner like this. Lestrange made a little gulp before looking at his team mates. With a wider smile Amanda sat back in her chair.

"But you know what we're not going to discuss Quidditch here tonight. It wouldn't be fair and I'm sure Eric and Matt will agree with me. After all anything that we say will be heard by the entire Slytherin Quidditch team and you might use what we say against us."

Slughorn laughed heartily.

"Surely you don't believe that Amanda."

She didn't reply as she picked up her goblet and took a sip. But the room suddenly went silent as the topic was dropped. Slughorn looked around for another topic. His eyes went to Lily and he gave her a smile.

"Lily have you decided yet which direction you intend to take next year? I still say that something with potions would be much better than charms."

"You would think that."

She gave a chuckle.

"I love charm work. I've been considering going into the committee of experimental charms work in the ministry. I've been in contact with Gilbert Wimple and he's keen to meet with me."

Amanda smiled at her plate. Lily could talk about this topic for hours. She had listened to the girl and Remus discuss this for two days straight. The pros and cons of such work. As far as Amanda could tell Lily's mind was made up and this was the direction she would go in no matter what anybody said.

"What about you Rabastan?"

"I have my estate to run. I have a few side projects that are in the planning stages but I think my future is bright."

The way he said side projects made Amanda glance at Lily. The girl looked like she too was thinking the same thing. Lestrange was the type of character that was likely to join the Death Eaters. His side project was likely going to be muggle torture and murder.

Slughorn though seemed ignorant of that as he smiled taking a sip of his nettle wine.

"Sounds like a comfy lifestyle. And I bet you'll be doing something similar Severus."

"Indeed."

The boy made no effort to say anything else. Amanda again looked at him but his eyes were on his plate. She was beginning to worry about him. He hadn't met her eye once this evening and hadn't looked at her once this year that she could recall. But they had agreed to disagree on so much that things had become distant between them.

"Amanda surely you've got some plans involving potions."

Her eyes snapped back to the professor and she gave a smile.

"Of course."

He waited and she shrugged.

"I'm going to be studying to become a Healer. So potions are going to be important."

He gave a little nod. But Amanda noticed the quizzical look on Regulus' face. He was staring at her as if she had three heads.

"What?"

All eyes went to her but she kept looking at the boy. He gave a strange sideways smile.

"I was just wondering how you're going to train and raise a family?"

She heard Lily gasp and knew her own mouth had dropped open.

"I'm not going to be raising a family."

Laughter was starting to sound as those gathered listened to the conversation.

"Sorry I just thought that the two of you would start a family as soon as you're married. He always said that he wanted lots of children and that he'd start straight after the honeymoon."

Amanda felt the colour fly to her cheeks as she realised what Regulus was talking about. Of course he would know that his parents had booked the church for Sirius' wedding. And he would of course know that she was the girl that his parents expected Sirius to marry.

"Regulus I'm sorry but I think you've gotten the wrong idea here."

He raised a brow at her and then suddenly he was laughing.

"You're not going to marry him are you?"

"Marry him? Marry who? Amanda is there something you've been hiding from us all?"

She looked sideways at the potions master. He looked delighted with the direction this conversation was heading. She though looked at Lily's gaping mouth and sighed. Her eyes went back to Regulus as she answered his question.

"Your parents may have booked the church Regulus. But that doesn't mean your brother wants to marry me."

"Of course he does. You must be blind if you think he doesn't want to Amanda."

"Regulus seriously Sirius doesn't want to marry me. He isn't ready for commitment like that."

"Yeah besides he can't even tell her he loves her. I bet he's too scared to marry her."

Lily's voice was light and filled with teasing. Amanda watched as Regulus' mouth fell open.

"He hasn't told you that he's in love."

"He isn't in love with me."

"She's blind, mind so is he."

"Will you shut up Lily!"

The redhead laughed and looked at Amanda again.

"Sirius is head over heels in love with you Amanda. He can barely stand being apart from you for more than a couple of hours. Everyone can see that, apart from you. And while we're on this topic you are just as much in love with him. And again everyone can see that except for the pair of you."

Amanda crossed her arms over her chest and shot her friend a look.

"What makes you think that I'm so stupid that I don't know how I feel about him?"

The girl opened and closed her mouth.

"Exactly. You know what I'll say it right here. I am completely in love with Sirius. I can't stand the idea of not being with him. I don't know how or when it happened but he's become the entire reason for my life. When I get up in the morning he's the first thing to cross my mind and I spend all day thinking about him. And then when I go to bed he's the last thing I think about and then he takes over my dreams. I want to be with him. And you know what I'll marry him. I will happily go to that church on July first and become Mrs Sirius Black. But as I told him I am not turning up at that church just because his parents have booked it. I am not marrying him just because his parents tell us that we should. When I marry him, and notice I said when not if. I want to marry him because he wants to be with me. I want to marry him because he's asked me."

Amanda dropped her fork and stood up smiling at those gathered.

"Now if you don't mind I've been here for what two hours. I think that's long enough because I can't stand to be apart from him for more than a couple of hours either. Goodnight."

She walked to the door with a smile on her face. Hopefully now she would never have to come to another one of these things. But as the door closed behind her she felt her stomach flutter. She couldn't help but hope that Sirius really did feel the way they all thought he did. Because what she had said was true. She would be trilled if she could be Amanda Black.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

James dodged to the left keeping his head down as he heard the hiss of air as the bludger flew inches passed him. He didn't slow his speed as he kept going. His eyes were on the hoops he was gaining on them. Taking the Quaffle out from under his arm he aimed and watched as the ball sailed through the right hoop. He punched the air joyously before turning to fly back down the other end.

The game was turning out just the way he had planned. Gryffindor were winning, by how much he wasn't certain. He knew that he had scored at least seven now and Jackie and Amanda had had their share as well. Slytherin had managed to get a few passed Sirius but no where near as many as the Gryffindors.

Regulus was speeding towards them with the Quaffle under his left arm. James was smiling as he picked up speed and aimed his broom at the boy. A bludger came from nowhere and knocked the end of James' broom. He spun dangerously as the Slytherin passed him. He cursed as he tried to cling to the broom and right it.

He turned in time to see Sirius block the goal and the Quaffle fly into the hands of Amanda. James hurried to block Lestrange from intercepting the play. He watched the scowl on the other players face as Amanda made her way towards goal. He turned to follow and watched her back pass to Jackie as a Bludger caught her shoulder.

Even from the distance he could hear the crack. His teeth ground together as he watched his friend slump forward a little. A whistle sounded and he quickly made his way to her.

"Mand you okay?"

"What do you think?"

"Dear you need to see somebody about that."

Amanda looked at Prewett and shook her head.

"We need to win this game."

James opened his mouth to tell her to go to the ground but she'd already taken off. The man didn't look happy but it was clear that the game needed to restart.

***

Three hours in and still there was no sign of the Snitch. The game had turned dirty much earlier. James could only see from one eye after Dixon had 'accidentally' elbowed him. His glasses had been smashed but he had easily fixed them.

Amanda's shoulder seemed to be out of its joint. She had it slumped uselessly at her side. Yet she still refused to land and have it seen too. Jackie's right foot seemed at a slightly odd angle as well after Lestrange had ploughed into her. The Slytherins were targeting the Chasers to try and get them out.

James had to admit that it was a good ploy. They were out scoring the Slytherins by about a hundred points, maybe a little more. Sirius was too quick with his blocks. He had made a particularly impressive save where he had swung from his broom with only one leg holding him on.

Branwen and Kat were trying their best with the Bludgers but there was only so much they could do when the Slytherins were trying to use strength instead of balls. They had managed to stop a few dangerous looking attempts at them and had knocked the Quaffle from the opponent's hands a number of times.

The truth was that they needed Randell to find the Snitch and they needed him to do it quickly. He had improved through the practices and was pretty good at weaving between players now. But he was inexperienced. Nott had been playing the position for six years now, he was the captain. He knew what he was doing. Randell was still learning.

A whistle disrupted James and he turned to see Kat falling through the air. Branwen was diving as were Amanda and Jackie. James followed them but didn't reach her in time. Jackie's hand closed around the other girl's ankle as she tried to haul her back up. Then Branwen had her other leg and one of her arms. He watched as she was pulled up onto Branwen's broom. Sirius appeared from nowhere with the lost broom.

James approached them quickly. He pulled his broom to a stop while Kat climbed over to her own.

"What happened?"

He could see that a nasty red mark was forming on the side of the girls face. She just shook her head tears in her eyes. Branwen spoke up.

"Avery flew straight into her; hit her across the face with his bat. She's lucky she's not unconscious or bleeding."

James swore loudly.

"Okay so we pick up the speed now. I know that most of us are injured but let's bring this home okay. Randell can't take much longer now. We keep scoring and then we win the game."

***

Twenty minutes later and ten goals had been scored by the Gryffindors. It was impressive considering their states of injuries. James dropped the Quaffle into Amanda's good arm as he zoomed upwards to avoid the girl's brother. Black was coming towards the girl but a quick movement and she'd passed him. He watched as the Quaffle headed towards the hoop. Before it could pass the whistle sounded.

James swore as he looked around. But quickly he was smiling. Randell was waving his arm high in the air beaming with excitement. Cheers were sounding from the Gryffindor fans. They had won. The game was over. Thank Merlin.

***

"You're all stupid do you realise that?"

Lily had her hands on her hips as she stared down at him. James was sat on a bed next to Amanda. He had a black eye forming and it had swollen. Madam Pomfrey had covered it with some paste and insisted that he remained on the bed until she told him otherwise.

She had quickly been looking over the injuries. She seemed to think that Kat had a hairline fracture and was spending a lot of her energy on helping her. Jackie had twisted her ankle and she had quickly sorted that out while Amanda had a dislocated shoulder.

Madam Pomfrey hadn't been so happy that they had remained playing with their injuries. She didn't care that they had won the game. And it seemed Lily felt the same way.

"We're all fine. You should go back to the party with the others."

James knew that there were celebrations going on in the common room. He had sent the three players who were uninjured to go join in with the rest of the house. The four of them had been sat silently until Lily had burst in with her yelling.

"I am not going to party James. You were stupid you're the Head Boy, the Captain. You should have made them see Madam Pomfrey as soon as they were injured. What the hell were you thinking?"

"That we were beating Slytherin."

Her eyes narrowed and James gulped a little.

"Lily I'm sorry okay. Look I promise that in the next two games if anybody is injured they get treated before getting back in the air. Is that good enough for you?"

She made a face before storming out of the room. James muttered under his breath but was shocked when he heard laughter. Amanda was staring at him with a smile on her face.

"What's so funny Mand?"

"She so wants you!"

James felt his mouth drop open but no words came out…

* * *

Sorry its taken so long to post this. Some things came up over here. But hope you like it

Kris xx


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

The door closed as the last prefect left the room. It had been a productive meeting that was sure. The schedule had been worked out for the next month of patrolling the halls in the evenings and they had discussed how they would all ensure that the younger students didn't attempt to go into Hogsmeade on the twentieth.

Lily leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes for a moment. It had been a very long weekend that was sure. Saturday had seen the first Quidditch game of the year. She had never been that big into the game but she had been surrounded by friends who were crazy about it for years. It had started to rub off. She had found herself in the stands screaming along with the rest of the house.

She still cringed as she replayed the moves the Slytherins had used. She could see the injuries of the Gryffindors so clearly. And as much as she didn't want to admit it the one that was the clearest in her mind was James' injury. It hadn't been the worse move of them all but Adrian Dixon had elbowed him roughly in the eye. She had seen his glasses smash and by the end his eye was puffy and red.

She wondered if she had over reacted about the injuries. The rest of the house had been happy to go and party after the victory of the team. She had heard Sirius argue with Amanda in the hospital wing before he had been sent to party about how stupid she had been to keep flying with a dislocated shoulder. But nothing had been said about Kat's hairline fracture or Jackie's twisted ankle. It seemed to her as if they were wiling to risk everything to win.

She had of course made a major fuss about it. She had yelled at the four injured players, told them how stupid they all were. But it was James she was annoyed with. He had been the one that she had directed most of her shouting at. But he had dismissed her worries so easily that she had stormed off.

She hadn't gone to the party she had walked around the halls. She knew that James had only suffered a black eye in the end but she had been really worried about him. It was driving her crazy this intense worry. She didn't understand why all of a sudden she cared so much about what happened to him.

It had been late when she had gone back to the common room. The party was still going on and she had noticed that there was a crowd around the three uninjured Quidditch players and that they had been joined by James. The other three were kept in the hospital wing over night to be watched.

Then the Sunday had been busy for Lily too. She had spent it trying to ignore James while doing her homework for Monday. She managed it just and then it was time to go to bed. Her head had been spinning still with thoughts of why she cared for his injuries. She had spent all Monday thinking about it and even all of that day. She had managed to keep away from James pretty much until the Tuesday evening prefect meeting.

"I'll finish up here if you like."

Lily opened her eyes and leaned forward causing the front two legs of the chair to hit the floor. She hadn't realised that he was still there.

"No I'll help."

She stood up and collected the sheets of paper off the table. James was extinguishing the candles around the room. They were quiet for a moment. It was a strange silence. It felt comfortable to Lily. But there was a strange edge to it. Looking up she watched the way that James leaned up to put out a high candle. He must have felt her eyes because he turned and gave her a small smile. She returned it before speaking.

"Are you planning to go into Hogsmeade on Saturday?"

He gave a shrug as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against a wall.

"I've been considering it but the boys don't want to head down there. So I might just stay up here with them. What about you?"

"I can't decide. Alice is going because she's meeting Frank in the café there. She really can't wait. But she wants somebody to walk down with her. But Branwen can't face the town. Besides Joe said he'd come up here to see her. And Amanda can't decide if she wants to go down there and buy a new set of robes or stay up here. But I suppose I might walk down with Alice and sit in the café with a book until she's ready to come back up here."

James nodded slightly.

"That's nice of you. It's best that nobody goes on their own."

"Yeah that's what I thought. So if Amanda wants to go I'll probably stay here but if she doesn't I'll go with Alice."

Again he nodded as Lily picked up the last sheet. He looked around the room quickly.

"I think that's everything. Do you want to head back to the common room."

She smiled and nodded her agreement.

She reached the door before him and waited while he closed it. Then she was surprised by the way he reached towards her. She felt her stomach flutter as his hands got close to hers. But she heard the harsh words escape her mouth.

"What are you doing?"

"I thought that maybe you'd want me to carry some of those papers. But if you'd rather."

He lifted his hands up to his shoulders in a sign of defeat. She watched then as he shoved them in his pockets and felt a little disappointed. This time the silence was more uncomfortable and Lily needed to break it.

"Have you decided if you're staying for Christmas yet?"

His eyes went up to her and he gave a brief little laugh.

"I'm going home. Actually Alice is coming to stay with us this Christmas. And I think that Sirius and Amanda are going to come round as well. I know they were planning on going back to Sirius' place but my mother has been writing to Sirius two or three times a week telling him that he's welcome to stay with us. I'm pretty sure they will. Are you going to stay here with Branwen?"

Lily shook her head slowly.

"Not a chance. Pa Evans thinks that dad might make it to Christmas but he's getting weaker. So this will probably be our last Christmas together and I don't want to miss that."

"I thought he was doing alright."

Lily gave a little sigh.

"I don't know to be honest. He looked so much weaker at Petunia's wedding. I don't know if I ever told you but when they walked passed me down the aisle he was whiter than the dress Tuney was wearing. And I'm pretty much positive that she was holding him up as they walked. He looked so ill."

"No you didn't tell me that."

James' voice was soft and there was a soothing edge to it. Lily could tell that he wasn't just saying that but that he meant what he said.

A small laugh escaped her mouth as she remembered the wedding. James' brow raised in a questioning manner.

"Sorry I was just remembering something he said that day."

"What?"

Lily shifted her weight a little as she walked up a hidden staircase.

"He was talking about how grown up Petunia and I looked and how he was worried about someone stealing me away from him like Vernon did Tuney."

"And that's funny?"

"He asked if you'd already managed it."

"Oh."

Lily saw the way his cheeks reddened a little and felt her own do the same.

"They were only teasing me. And daddy remembered that I used you as an excuse for him to let me come back to Hogwarts."

"You did?"

Lily felt her cheeks gain more heat.

"He wanted me to stay home when he found out about the war. But I told him if that was the case he'd have to get use to you camping out on the doorstep. I told him that you had to ask me on a date at least twice a week. But I honestly didn't think he had taken it in, I mean he was pretty out of it when we spoke that time. And then he brought it up at the wedding. But it was nice to see him and Pa laughing even if it was embarrassing me."

James simply nodded.

"Pa told me that day that dad is losing the battle he's fighting."

"That must be hard to know. At least with my dad it was quick and nobody saw it coming. I can't imagine how it must feel to watch someone you love slowly slip away."

Lily nodded as the came out onto the seventh floor corridor. It was empty as they walked together towards the portrait.

"There's something I want to ask you Lily."

She felt her stomach flutter. Maybe this was it. Maybe he would finally ask her out again.

"Why were you so worked up over the Quidditch game this weekend?"

She sighed and briefly closed her eyes. She stopped walking and faced the boy in front of her.

"I was worried about my friends. It was a really rough game and I thought the injuries may have been worse than they were."

He nodded slightly and she noticed that his left hand went to his hair. His voice was almost a whisper when he spoke again.

"Some people think that you were worried about me."

"Of course I was. You are my friend."

A silence appeared and Lily didn't know what to do. There was something new on James' face that she was unsure of. Then something her father had said came to her mind. He had told her it was okay for a girl to make the first move. Taking a breath she spoke quickly in one go afraid to stop in case she chickened out.

"James will you come to Hogsmeade with me?"

This time the silence felt heavier than before. A blush was on her face as the boy looked at her. She saw his eyes were wide. His mouth opened and closed a few times then he spoke softly.

"Do you mean that?"

"Yes."

The word barely sounded even to her own ears.

"Like a date?"

"Yes."

Again her voice was tiny. She watched as a smile came to his face and then a laugh escaped his lips.

"I'd love to."


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

Frank watched his knight move with a grin on his face.

"Check mate."

Joe swore in answer as Frank laughed. The pair were having a night in at the flat where Joe lived with his brothers. Kyle was working late and Anton was out with a couple of his team mates. It was nice to have a quiet night just the pair of them.

"You're cheating."

"No you just suck at this game."

Joe made a noise that clearly said he didn't agree. Frank though picked up his mug of hot chocolate as Joe reset the board.

"I'll beat you this time."

Frank simply laughed and nodded. He'd already won the three games that they had played. This was something that he had always been good at. He was able to strategise, he was able to see further ahead than Joe which was why he always won at chess.

"You going up to Hogsmeade on Saturday?"

Frank gave a little nod as he moved his pawn. He knew that Joe would distract him with thoughts of Alice to try and win this game. He also knew that it was likely to work.

"Are you excited?"

"More than I can express."

"Why can't you just say yes?"

Frank shot Joe a look and then sighed.

"Fine. Yes I'm excited."

Joe laughed.

"I'm heading up to Hogwarts. I've got to cover the Quidditch game at four thirty but I figure if I go up for about ten I can have a few decent hours with Branwen."

Frank gave him a look and the other boy laughed.

"Okay I'm smitten."

Frank laughed.

"Why don't you bring her down to Hogsmeade for a few hours? It'll do her some good to get out of the school for a couple of hours."

"Hogsmeade probably isn't the best place to take her."

Frank was thoughtful for a moment. It slowly hit him what Joe meant by that. Tad had died in Hogsmeade. Of course Branwen wouldn't want to go there.

"That's a pity. I was hoping that maybe I could embarrass you with some stories about just how smitten you are."

"Hey man I'm not the one looking for engagement rings."

Frank blushed at this. He hadn't realised that Joe knew about that. A laugh broke through his thoughts.

"Don't look so panicked. I won't tell Alice."

"How did you know anyway?"

"I saw you in Diagon Alley looking at the jewellery."

"You could have told me."

"What would have been the fun in that?"

Frank moved a piece and grinned.

"Check."

Joe's eyes went back to the game and he quickly made a move blocking Frank.

"When do you plan on asking her?"

"Why? Are you planning anything yourself?"

Joe shot him a look.

"I've only been with Branwen a month. Don't rush me!"

Frank laughed and then sighed.

"Not yet. I love Alice and I miss her so much. But I don't want to do it while she's still in Hogwarts. Maybe this summer."

"Do you know Sirius told me that he's got a church booked for his and Amanda's wedding."

Frank stuttered in the middle of commanding his bishop to move.

"They're getting married? Alice never said."

Joe laughed at this.

"No Sirius' parents booked them a church though. I'm sure if you ask Sirius you can have the booking. It just means that you'll have to ask Alice sooner rather than later."

Frank stuttered a few more times.

"What are you scared she'll say no."

"Shut up Joe."

"It would be a lovely Christmas present for her. And then an early July wedding. Perfect!"

"Check mate."

Joe's mouth dropped open and Frank gave a little chuckle. He missed Alice like mad. He wanted to marry her more than anything but he didn't think he was ready to ask her just yet.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

Lily smoothed her hair again as she glanced once more at her reflection in the mirror. Her stomach was fluttering with nervousness and excitement. This was the day that throughout her school years she had never thought would come. But now she couldn't wait for it.

The grin on her face was goofy as she thought about it. She was going on a date with James Potter. Was she insane? She remembered their years together so far. They had been friends throughout Hogwarts, sure there had been patchy times but to her mind always friends. This was going to change things.

Sure he had been trying to change it for a while but she had refused it. She had been the one to say no. But now she had made the move. She had asked him out. She had thought for a moment he would say no to her. He hadn't after all asked her out once this year. But they had been flirting. She was sure that he had noticed that.

A giggle from behind her made her turn. Alice was shaking her head slowly.

"Who would have thought James Potter would make you act this way?"

"I'm not acting anyway."

Alice's arms were folded over her chest and she gazed around the empty dorm room.

"All these clothes on the floor, they're the ones you've tried on for this date."

"Branwen changed her outfit four times."

"You're grinning like a maniac."

"So are you!"

Alice gave a little sigh as she laughed.

"I don't mean it in a bad way Lily. It's good to see you this happy. I'm just surprised that its James is all. After all you've turned him down two hundred and seventy three times over the last three years."

"How'd you know that?"

"Amanda and Sirius have kept count. Apparently they've been having a bet for the last three years over whether or not you'd say yes."

"Really."

"Yeah, Sirius lost."

Lily laughed gently as she looked at her reflection one last time.

"Okay I think I'm ready."

***

"Will you stop pacing you're making me dizzy?"

James stopped and turned to look at Peter. He was sat in the armchair with his legs wrapped under his body. He had a copy of a comic that James was sure followed a muggle. Shaking his head he dropped onto the sofa.

"Sorry Pete I'm just worked up."

"Yeah I know you've been doing that since you got up this morning."

"I can't help it. I'm going on a date with Lily. Lily!"

Peter simply nodded as he folded the comic.

"Have you decided where you're going to take her?"

"Hey she asked me! Shouldn't she be in charge of the date?"

He couldn't help but grin as he said it. She had really asked him out on this date. That meant she actually wanted to go out with him. He had been over excited by the prospect of this date since Tuesday night. He had it all planned out in his mind. He would take her for a stroll around the shack before into the shops. He would pay for anything that she wanted to buy before taking her to the Three Broomsticks for a quick lunch.

"Morning James, Peter."

James looked up to see Alice stood behind the sofa. But his eyes didn't stay on her they shifted to the red head stood beside her. Lily looked stunning dressed simply in jeans and a jumper. Her hair lay against her shoulders and her eyes twinkled. He couldn't help but smile.

"See you all later."

He heard Peter's words and simply waved his hand towards him as he followed the two girls out of the portrait.

***

Alice couldn't help but grin as she walked a couple of paces behind her friends. They were lost in conversation that seemed effortless. She didn't mind that they had forgotten that she was with them it was sweet to see them together. They looked as if they went together.

She was careful to keep far enough behind them so that the words they were speaking wouldn't reach her. She remembered her first date with Frank it had been fun and easy but she would have been embarrassed to have her friends listening in. She wondered how Amanda had managed to keep her cool when the three boys had joined her and Sirius on their first official date.

The space between the two was shortening as their arms started to brush. Alice looked slightly to the left because she didn't want to watch them. She was thankful that they were almost at the village. She knew that if anything was to happen the two would snap out of it instantly and they would be fine together but this felt wrong to her.

She smiled widely as when the village came into view the two turned and walked towards the shack. They didn't even look backwards to say goodbye to her. A small shiver ran through her then as she looked around. The last time she had been here had been so different. She had been running behind Dumbledore to reach a fight that had cost nine students and a professor their lives. That wasn't including the fifteen locals and shoppers that had also been killed.

She picked up the pace as she walked through the street. So much for the plan that James and Lily had had to walk her to the café. Thankfully it wasn't far off the main road. Taking a left she saw the front of the shop. Taking a breath she slowed to a walk as she reached forward and opened the door.

***

Lily laughed as James made a howling sound at the top of the hill.

"Go on you try."

"James ghosts don't howl!"

"And who said I'm impersonating a ghost?"

"You're impersonating the sounds that come from within the shack. Everyone knows that this place is the most haunted building in Britain."

He shook his head giving her a funny look.

"What?"

He brushed his hands through his hair as he gave a little shrug looking around them.

"Lily this place is only haunted during the time of the full moon."

"What of course is isn't …"

Suddenly the howl that James had made became clear to her. She felt her eyes widen as she looked back at the shack. Everything that she thought she knew changed in that second. She shook her head and looked back at the boy in front of her.

"You're saying that this is where Remus …"

James nodded to her. She felt her brows pull together in a quizzical way.

"But how would you know."

"Because we know where he goes. He told us back in second year."

She gave a little nod. A new understanding came to her mind. Then giving a quick glance out of the corner of her eye in James direction she let out a loud howl. She could hear his laughter when she stopped.

***

Frank watched from the back room as Alice stepped inside the café. It was empty today he had spoken to his mother and she had agreed to close up for the day. He was thankful to her for that. Lifting his wand he gave it a flick and the closed sign on the door turned over as the lights dimmed.

"Frank?"

There was a nervous sound to Alice's voice. Frank knew that she would maybe think that this was an attack waiting to happen after what had happened last time. So he opened the door and stepped into the main shop. She looked at him with her eyes wide and he simply smiled.

She was across the room in a second and he felt her arms fly around his neck as her lips pushed against his. He didn't fight her movement. His arms tightened around her as he deepened the kiss. He had missed her so much, this felt like home to him.

***

James couldn't help but smile as he walked back down the track towards the town with Lily. He was glad that he had thought to take her to the shack. It had been fun to see her let loose and howl with him. He knew that it would be thought childish but it was a good way to get rid of pent up emotions and now his mind felt clear.

He noticed though how close her body felt to him. They were side by side and his arm was easily brushing against hers. But because of the cold November weather the layers of clothes stopped any skin contact. It had snowed during the night and the temperature had dropped. But it gave the area a magical feel to it.

Drawing in a breath he wondered how brave he could be on this date. Reaching his little finger towards Lily's hand he managed to wrap it around hers. He felt the way that she tightened hers around his. He felt the smile grow as slowly he reached over a little more and took her hand properly. She didn't pull away and laced her fingers through his. Happily they walked back towards the village.

***

Alice sat at a small table that was covered in a checker red table cloth. A single white candle brunt in the middle of it with a little white vase with a red rose beside it. Around the café the other lights were low.

"I can't believe you did all this Frank."

She smiled as he placed a platter on the table in front of her.

"I wanted to be alone with you and this seemed the best way."

"And your mother was happy to close the café for the day."

"She owed me a favour and this is her way of paying me back."

"Why what did you do?"

"I didn't go home last night. And please don't ask why she wanted me out I don't want to think about what she had planned for Victor."

Alice laughed lightly as she picked up a sandwich and took a bite.

"You know I am glad that she agreed. It's very nice to have you to myself for a few hours."

"I'm glad you think so."

She just grinned at the way Frank was smiling at her.

***

Lily picked up the book and turned it over in her hand. It looked like it could be interesting. She needed a new book to read for pleasure. She had finished hers and although she could have gone to the library she had heard good reviews about this book.

She looked over at where James was stood. He was holding a book himself turning it over and back again. She wandered over and tipped the cover up to look at. On the front was a beautiful witch with flowing blonde hair. She was clung to the chest of a very muscular looking brunette male.

"Really James I didn't know you liked to read romance books."

She noticed a small amount of red go to his cheeks as he looked back up at her.

"It's not for me. My mum loves this stuff and it says that this book is new. So I was thinking that it might make a good Christmas present for her."

"That's very thoughtful of you."

"What have you got?"

Lily showed him her book and he took it from her hand turning it over. She gave him a smile as she spoke.

"It's about a young wizard who is plagued by his past. He was brought up by his mother in the muggle world before discovering that he was a wizard. Only once he got to the school he noticed a resemblance between himself and one of his professors. Suddenly he's thrown into a world of discovery over his own background and his mother's involvement with the wizarding world."

"I think I've heard of this book. Didn't that witch on the radio give it five wands?"

"Yep its suppose to be great."

He gave her a soft smile as he walked towards the cashier.

"James what are you doing?"

She followed him as he placed the two books on the counter. Her eyes widened as the cashier picked them up and hit the prices into the till.

"James wait I can pay for my own book."

"Don't be silly Lily."

"But I can afford it."

"Lily my father would be horrified. He always taught me that when on a date it's the man's job to treat the lady. So I'm paying for your book."

Lily wanted to fight about it but couldn't help the smile that was threatening her lips. She had never guessed how much of a gentleman James was.

***

Frank was silent as he watched Alice walk around the table. She reached his side and brushed her finger across his cheek.

"That was a great meal Frank."

"It was just some sandwiches and crisps."

She was smiling as she leaned towards him.

"It was the thought that counted."

Then her lips were on his. She tasted so sweet to him. It only took him a second to push his chair away from the table and pull her onto his lap. He had missed kissing her these last three months. His arms tightened against her as her lips pulled away and kissed down his jaw. His own found her neck before their lips once more found each other…

***

James watched as Lily put her fork down and smiled at him.

"That was really good. Thank you James."

"I'm glad you enjoyed it."

She was looking down at her plate and James leaned over towards her.

"What is it?"

"I'm just thinking that I wish I had said yes to you before."

"Really?"

"Today has been the best date I've ever been on."

"Are you just saying that?"

She shook her head and James grinned wider.

"So does that mean that you would be willing to come on another date with me?"

"Are you asking me?"

She was smiling now. James reached across the table and took Lily's left hand. Looking into her eyes he leaned over and kissed the back of it.

"Lily Evans would you consider being my girlfriend?"

She pressed her lips together and looked to one side making it look she was thinking long and hard about it. Then with a smile and a wink she spoke.

"Yes."

It was a simple answer but James felt the flutter in his chest. The grin on his face was wide as he squeezed her hand in his.

***

Alice gave a little gasp as suddenly her mind started to kick in. It was as if she had been elsewhere and her body was acting without her control. She pulled her hands from under Franks top and pulled her lips from his.

His grey eyes opened and looked at her. She gave a little sheepish grin before looking down. Frank's fingers were brushing against the skin beneath her jumper and she could feel his fingers rubbing against her bra.

"Sorry."

His words were low and breathy as he pulled his hands down brushing over her waist before pulling them out. Her cheeks were red she could feel the blood in them. What had just happened? Had she started that? She knew that she had kissed Frank and happily sat on his lap. But had she placed her hands on him before he had her. She shook her head slowly.

"There's nothing to be sorry about."

"I didn't mean to push you Alice. I don't want you to think –"

"I don't think anything Frank."

She leaned over and kissed his lips gently before standing up.

"I do think I should be heading back to Hogwarts though."

"I'll walk you."

***

Lily happily held James' hand as they strolled up the pathway towards the school gates. She felt giddy and well like a school girl. It felt strange thinking that. She was a school girl but this was something new. She wondered if this was how you were suppose to feel in a new relationship. She never had before.

The smile that was plastered on her face felt like it would never go away. But she didn't care. She could picture smiling with James forever. Maybe she could picture being with James forever. No that was just too strange. This was just one date. That was getting far to ahead of herself.

As they stepped into the school grounds though Lily couldn't help but think this was the start of something. Things were due to change very soon. So much was about to end and more to begin. Maybe this was just the first of many wonderful things to come.

***

"Alice I am sorry about earlier."

Frank squeezed his girlfriends hand a little. He didn't know what had come over him. He missed her yes but he had never intended to feel her up. What if Alice hadn't have pulled away when she did? Would he have gone any further? Would he have slipped his hands further up her body or maybe even lower? He knew that he loved her and that he had imagined such things many times but to actually do it. Well that would be something else.

"Please don't apologise anymore Frank."

"But Alice –"

"But nothing. I love you Frank and we've been together what? Four years now. I think we're both mature enough to deal with a bit of groping."

She gave him a stunning smile and Frank couldn't help but return it. He leaned towards her and gently brushed his lips against hers.

"I love you Alice Scott."

"I know."

They stayed like that for a few moments. Then Alice pulled back.

"I really should get back in."

He nodded and gave a little rueful smile.

"I guess that I'll see you at Christmas next then."

Her lips brushed his cheek as she sighed.

"I miss you Frank."

"I miss you too."

Then he watched as with a little wave she turned and walked into the school grounds. He waited until she rounded the corner before concentrating and leaving the spot to head back home.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Sirius laughed as he watched Amanda lying on her back in the snow. She was grinning as she waved her arms up and down while kicking her legs out sideways.

"Come on Si its fun!"

"I'd rather just watch."

"Spoil sport."

She was grinning though as she said it. He continued to watch until she lifted her hands towards him. He leaned forward and helped to pull her up. Where she had lain now sat a perfect snow angel. She laughed as she bumped her shoulder into his side.

"Told you I could make one!"

"I never said you couldn't. I said I couldn't."

"And why is that?"

"It's too cold to roll in the snow."

She laughed lightly as with cat like reflexes she pounced. Sirius managed to catch her as she threw her weight against him. But the surprise of it caused him to stumble and he rolled backwards into the snow.

"HEY!"

She only laughed as she pulled the hat off his head and rubbed snow into his dark hair. He gave a low growl as he rolled so that once more she was lying in the snow.

***

Branwen felt cosy as she snuggled up next to Joe. His arm easily wrapped around her as they sheltered behind a large rock looking out onto the lake. The snow hadn't managed to penetrate this area and the low wind was blocked. It felt like a perfect hideaway to her.

"What time is the game today then?"

Joe gave a soft little sigh as his gaze stayed on the lake.

"Four o'clock so I've got to be there for three so Pippa and I can go through the set up."

She glanced down at her watch. It was barely ten so they had plenty of time and she voiced that. Joe's voice sounded a little sad as he replied to her though.

"I wish it was more time though."

"We'll have plenty of time over Christmas though."

She heard his low chuckle as he leaned in and kissed her forehead.

"I thought you were staying here."

"I am because nhad is. But that doesn't mean I have to stay on the grounds. He'll let me visit you in the days and I'm sure it could be arranged for you to come up here. I mean there'll be plenty of room."

"Yeah and I can sleep on a sofa in the Gryffindor common room."

"Hell you could sleep in one of the boys beds. They're all going home."

He tickled her side as he gave her a quick glance.

"What are you too scared to let me sleep on the sofa in case you can't resist my charms."

The way he wriggled his eyebrows made her giggle as she flicked him in the arm.

"If that was the case the boy's dorms aren't going to be much protection are they."

He seemed to think about it for a moment before nodding slowly.

"Yes that is true. Maybe I better stay in the Slytherins dorms then!"

They both laughed lightly as they watched the lake.

***

"Okay you win!"

Amanda was laughing and could hardly catch her breath. Sirius had her pinned against the ground and she could feel the cold snow through her jumper. Maybe it would have been a smart idea to put a cloak on.

"I always win. You should remember that."

He looked cocky as he grinned down at her. But before she could reply his lips had found hers. There was no arguing with him when he did this and he knew it. She was sure he only kissed her when he wanted to get away with something.

Finally he pulled back and grinned down at her. She gave him a little push and laughed.

"Can we get up now? My back is starting to melt the snow and its getting wet."

Sirius slowly got up and helped her climb to her feet. He grinned wickedly but didn't push her back over. Instead he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and drew her close.

"Mandy can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Would you mind much if we didn't spend Christmas at my place this year?"

She looked up and gave him one of those looks that said she was wondering what he was going to say next. But he said nothing.

"Are we going to stay here then?"

"No."

"Sirius?"

"Jacqueline Potter has been writing me letters almost daily for the last two weeks. She wants me to spend Christmas with her and James."

"Oh."

Amanda bit her lower lip. Sirius would be going home with James and she would have to stay here on her own. Well at least Branwen would be here.

"She wants you to come as well. She thinks it might be nice for Alice to have someone other than me and James for company."

"I couldn't possibly impose like that."

"I told her that's what you would say."

"Huh."

"Well I told her that I was planning on spending Christmas with you. And she said that of course I should spend it with you. But that we should also spend it with her. But I told her you'd feel like you were imposing."

Amanda gave a little laugh.

"And what did she say about that?"

"That I was being stupid that you would not think that at all. That you would understand that an old lady wanted to spend Christmas with her family and that you are part of her family considering you are dating her 'adopted' son."

"Really."

"Yes and she's meeting us off the train."

"So really there's no choice."

"Not unless you want to tell her."

Amanda chewed her lip lightly and looked at Sirius.

"I guess we're spending Christmas with Jacqueline then."

The smile on his face said that he had been hoping that would be the plan all along.

* * *

Okay so I know this is a lot shorter than the last one. It is Hogsmeade weekend and Joe came up to see Branwen and Amanda and Sirius stayed in the school. I just wanted to show how different the four couples are. And well there's not much I wanted to show with these two. It was more about Alice and Frank moving on and Lily and James starting out.

But if you want to know Branwen and Joe sat there talking for most of the day while Amanda and Sirius played in the snow!

Kris xx


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

_It has been confirmed that twenty three muggles were murdered in yesterdays attack on Hope Hospital in Salford just outside of the city of Manchester. It is unclear why this place was targeted but some within the ministry are saying it could be to cause an impact._

_Over the last number of weeks we've seen a raise in muggle torture and attacks on local organisations. The British Library was subject to attack only ten days ago. However due to a lucky chance no muggle was murdered. However several are still in St. Mungos receiving treatment._

_Feeling in the wizarding community is that this is just the start of things to come. So far no major attack has occurred since Hogsmeade back in May where twenty four people including students of Hogwarts lost their lives. People are speculating that it is only time until Diagon Alley becomes the target._

_We here at the Daily Prophet are asking people to be careful when out and about. The identities of the attackers are unknown for the most part and even your best friend could be involved. _

_Rita Skeeter_

Remus shook his head as he lowered the paper. Skeeter was scare mongering again. He knew that attacks were on the increase, the wizarding world knew it but still. The fact that they printed about best friends would cause trouble.

He knew that the greatest threat was the fact that people were turning on one another. The way that the press were covering stories was helping that along. He knew that the best thing was to trust the people around you. To take care of one another.

But maybe that wasn't everybody. Maybe it was just them. Maybe they had been through so much that they knew they could trust each other. He honestly couldn't imagine having to worry about being attacked by one of his friends. They were head strong, independent people who understand the need to resist what Voldemort considered true.

But no matter how much Remus felt secure and relaxed with his own security he had a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach that just wouldn't go away. Each day he would pick up the paper and read about an attack, a murder or an arrest. He would sit in the common room and listen to the radio describe scenes of carnage and his memory would bring last May back to his mind and he'd remember that panicked feeling.

He was finding that as each day passed it wasn't for himself that he worried. He worried for the people he loved out in the world. He feared for his mum and dad. He knew that in the scale of things they were nobodies. They were low down the list of threats. They weren't like Thomas Scott or Henry Potter had been. They were not like Ddraig. His parents had no part in the resistance that was taking place.

He knew that his father was getting up at six every morning and heading down to the kitchen. He would put on a pot of coffee while his mother would put some bacon or sausages into the fire for their breakfast. Then he would head into the ministry to the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. When he arrived he would sit at his desk and open the folders that were waiting in his tray.

Remus thought again how strange it was that his father had worked in the department for as long as he could remember and yet was not a climber. Remus knew that both Thomas Scott and Henry Potter had worked within this department. They had worked within the Beast part of the department dealing with dragons and had become liaisons with other ministries in setting up border rules for the transporting of the creatures.

His father though worked in the Being Division and since being in his twenties had been part of the werewolf support service. That was how he had met and offended Fenir Greyback. That was why the werewolf had settled himself close to their house one night and when the moon was full had bitten Remus. He didn't blame his father for that; he knew that he blamed himself enough. But it made Remus worry.

It was common knowledge that the werewolves on the whole were siding with Voldemort. Remus felt that it had something to do with the way that they were treated by society. He had realised early on how lucky he was. Dumbledore had looked passed his condition and treated him as a person in allowing him to attend the school. His friends had seen him for the person and not the beast and now continued to stand by him. For most werewolves this wasn't the case.

Remus worried that since his father knew the identity of so many that they would turn on him. Greyback already had a grudge against him and it wouldn't be long until he convinced others to do as he did. Although it was still speculative about the part they were playing it was clear in Remus' mind that it was only time. So he worried for his father's safety.

But he also worried for his mother. She was a simple dress marker. She had never had great ambition to make a difference in the world the way his father had. She had wanted to be a mother and a wife. Her goals had been to have about five children and be a stay at home mum. That had all changed when he was bitten. Their savings went on treatment plans for him and they needed a second income.

So she went to Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions and met with the witch. After only one meeting she was offered a job and she loved it there. Remus knew that it occupied her mind from other things. But she was in a prime location in Diagon Alley and as much as Remus hated to agree with Rita Skeeter it was only time until Death Eaters attacked there. He hated the idea of his mother being hurt.

As much as he tried to rationalise his fears he knew that it didn't matter if they were standing up against Voldemort or not. The truth was that the Death Eater attacks could be random. That they would pick a location and burn it to the ground just for the fun of it. So everyone outside of Hogwarts was at risk.

But Remus had another reason to fear. There was a memory from the night where he had felt his world had ended. It was a memory he had buried inside himself deep to keep away. He hated all reminders of that night. But when he worried about his parent's safety it seemed to surface. He could remember the words spoken as clearly as if they were being spoken to him in that moment.

"_You Remus know more than most that friendship is one of the strongest things in the world. That having people see you as equal is a strength. But most werewolves don't have that. So Voldemort by offering it to them will get their support. However he also knows that you have been accepted. So it is my guess that he is trying to force you to leave the people you care about. He is trying to make you think that by being close to someone they will end up dead. Then when you are alone he will target you to join him." _

Dumbledore had spoken those words to him following Ginny's death. It was true he had felt alone for a long time following that. He knew that it was stupid because his friends had surrounded him but it was the empty feeling inside. What scared him the most was that if Ginny had been killed because he had loved her then what was stopping them from killing his parents? They could take away the last remains of his family and that could throw him over the edge.

He realised though that he wasn't the only one fearing this. Hogwarts had become a place filled with worry. Students would come here with the knowledge that they may never see their parents again. Only the day before a third year Ravenclaw was given the news that her entire family had been killed in an attack on their home. It was becoming the norm.

But they needed to stay strong. They needed not to panic over it. Remus had realised that whatever was happening he couldn't control. He would just trust those around him and do his best. Whatever happened was going to happen. And attacks unfortunately looked like they were going to get worse.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

November faded from sight and December showed itself. The temperatures dropped as the festive season started. Snow flakes had made an early appearance but continued to make their presence known. By the end of the first week Hogwarts looked like a fairy tale scene. The beauty of it was breath taking.

And while people in the outside world were hurrying to buy Christmas trees and put up decorations lessons continued in Hogwarts. People were busy buying presents for the ones they loved in Hogsmeade or Diagon Alley and the students were busy with homework.

Amanda closed her eyes and laid her head in her hands. Her eyes were starting to go fuzzy and the words she was carefully trying to write seemed to be getting smaller and smaller. She could feel a headache coming on and wished that she could just curl up in bed and sleep.

The morning had felt long to her. She had only sat through two lessons though and had four hours off before her double potions class. Mondays always felt long to her. She hated the fact that her lessons were so spread out. The first two sessions of the day and the last two. It made Mondays feel dragged out.

Maybe she could go back to bed for a few hours though. Her headache was strong and she knew a little nap would help. But the only problem was that she hadn't finished her potions essay. She had another seven inches to write of it. But maybe Slughorn would let her off. Or if he gave her detention that wouldn't be the end of the world.

Really today just wasn't a day she had been looking forward to. It was stupid she knew today really wasn't any different from any other Monday. It just felt it to her. Maybe it was because today was December thirteenth and she was now eighteen.

Birthdays had never been anything particularly special when she was growing up. Maybe it was because her father had believed that the only thing worth celebrating was achievement, well you don't achieve a birthday. But her years in Hogwarts had turned them into something to celebrate. It was after all an excuse to have a party and her friends like all Gryffindors enjoyed parties.

But this birthday felt different to her. Maybe it was because it was the last one she would have in Hogwarts. Maybe it was because it was the first one since she had become of age. Or maybe it had something to do with the two letters she had shoved in her bag this morning before Sirius could see the handwriting.

She wondered if he had any idea about them. His own birthday had been nearly two months earlier and he had received a letter from his mother instructing him on their marriage. It seemed only logical that she too would get one. However only two days after his birthday she had received an owl from her mother instructing her that the marriage date would not be pushed by her. Amanda could recite that letter by heart she had read it so often.

_Daughter_

_I have received word from Chu'si that she has sent word to Sirius of weddings plans. I assure you that I have had no part in these preparations. When last we spoke I came to the realisation that you are far more mature than I would imagine a seventeen year old to be. I realise that this is in part due to my failings as a mother and I hold myself responsible for what has befallen you whilst under my care._

_The choices that you have made go against my beliefs and against what I would have chosen for you. However I stand by my words and repeat that I am proud of you for being the honourable woman that you are. You have faced your fears and taken a difficult road because it is what you believe to be true. And I can not begrudge you that._

_My rights over you have long ended and I promise to stand back and allow you to do as you wish. It is the only gift I feel I can give to you. I no longer see any chance of us reconciling our differences as I once did. Thus again showing my failings as a mother. This is where our paths part. You have chosen one way and I a very different one._

_I can not promise that you will be safe. What you did to your father has brought you many enemies from within his ranks. Once you have left the safety of the school you will be a target for everyone who wishes revenge on you. I can not stop them nor can I help you._

_But there is one thing that I can do for you now. I will stand by you for one last time. I have come to realise through your actions that you do not feel the need to do as you are ordered. It is something that has driven me crazy for many years. But I wish for you to know that I agree that after such a long separation your decisions should be your own. So I write to tell you not to marry Sirius on July first._

_I have spoken to your cousin Severus and I know that you and Sirius are in a committed relationship and that you are happy. I am glad for I believe that even if all other decisions on my part have been wrong this one is right. You and Sirius have always belonged together you share a bond that is stronger than any I have ever witnessed._

_However to marry him on July first will be to do the bidding of his family and in part your own. It is a date that was decided when you were still infants. I do not tell you not to marry him if that is your choosing but I tell you to do it your own way. Wait for that date to pass and then marry him. Show his family as you have shown me that you are your own person and do not do as they bid._

_This is all I can do for you now Amanda. I wish you happiness for your future and that you will come to realise that I have always loved you even if it was in the wrong way. I hope that when you become a mother you will see just how difficult it can be to know what is right for your children. But always listen to them Amanda. Do not make the same mistakes that I did. _

_This will be the last you will hear from me. I have decided to leave England for good. It is nothing but bad memories for me. I will not tell you where I go or when I leave. _

_Take care of yourself and remember to be careful. _

_Yours sincerely_

_Mother. _

Amanda had felt that same churning in her stomach as after the trial on her father. It was a churning that indicated the end of a family tie. She didn't regret that it had ended but she did pity her mother. Amanda had sat up many a night wondering if she had been forced the way her mother had if she would have made the same mistakes.

As the headache increased though so did Amanda's puzzlement. She hadn't opened the letters yet but couldn't figure out who they would be from. Her mother had said in the last letter that she would not hear from her again. So who would be writing to her?

"Amanda are you alright?"

She had been still too long. This free period was shared with Alice, Peter and Sirius. They were all sat around a table in the common room together working on essays. Opening her eyes she looked at Sirius carefully.

"I've just got a headache."

There was something in his eyes that said he knew that it was more than that. His hand reached over and took hers squeezing it tightly. She lowered her head onto his shoulder closing her eyes once again. Her mother was right about one thing. She and Sirius did share a bond and she was glad that it was there.

"Let's go sit on the sofa for a bit."

"I haven't finished my potions essay yet though."

She heard a little mutter from Alice and a barked laugh from Sirius. Then he was pulling her up towards the sofa. She didn't open her eyes as he led her there she trusted him enough for that. Once she was settled she cuddled up close to him and spoke softly.

"What did Alice say?"

"That it doesn't matter if you don't finish the essay Slughorn will still give you top marks."

She gave a tiny smile. She could feel herself drifting off to sleep and was quite happy to do so. Then she heard Sirius' voice.

"Happy Birthday by the way."

His lips brushed against her forehead.

"Thanks."

They were silent for a few more moments before Sirius spoke up.

"What did my mother say then?"

"Huh?"

"In the letter Mand."

She opened one eye to look up at him.

"I didn't get a letter from your mum."

"I saw her handwriting."

Amanda closed her eye again. Well that explained one letter. The other though was still a mystery.

"Well what did it say?"

Amanda gave a little shrug as she pulled her wand out.

"Accio letters."

They came from her bag and floated over to where she was sat. She didn't reach for them she couldn't really see where they were. But she felt Sirius' movement.

"They're still sealed."

"I didn't open them."

"This one here is from my mother. I don't know about this one though, but it does look fancy."

"Open them."

"They're your letters."

"Sirius I've got a headache. I can't read anything at the moment. You do it."

She heard a tearing and the rustle of paper. Then after a few minutes a low tutting sound.

"Mother has written to inform you that it is your duty as a daughter to follow the biddings of your father. That even though you have proven yourself to be untrustworthy to your family a contract has been signed and you have no choice but to follow it."

Amanda sighed.

"I'm still not marrying you on July first."

"My mother is under the impression that you are."

"Well then when my headache goes I will write to her to inform her that one my mother has forbidden me to marry you on July first. That two I have been completely disowned by the Dixon family making the contract null and void. And three I refuse to marry you until you propose."

She felt Sirius shift his weight but didn't comment. She had made the same point when his letter had arrived. She had seen how worried and confused that had made him. She felt sure that the prospect of marrying her was the last thing Sirius wanted to think about. Hell she wasn't even sure that he loved her enough to want anything after Hogwarts.

She quickly attempted to change the subject.

"What does the second letter say?"

She heard him open it and mutter something.

"It's in Spanish."

Opening her eyes she reached for the letter. Her head still hurt and she was coming to the conclusion she might have to visit Madam Pomfrey soon but thankfully her eyes felt less fuzzy.

"It's from my grandmother Herchicco. It's informing me that she is involved in the wedding plans with your mother and that I have a dress fitting to attend on December 20th. Looks like my grandmother is going to be disappointed."

Amanda scrunched the letter into a ball and threw it into the fire. Then closing her eyes she leaned back against Sirius. As she felt herself drifting to sleep she found her voice.

"Wake me up in time for lunch."

Then with her head resting against Sirius' chest she fell asleep.

* * *

I'm really sorry about the delay that has sprung up between posting. Unfortunately this is likely to continue as I've just gotten back into Uni and I start lectures again next Wednesday. So things are rather hectic at the moment as I try to get uniform and police checks and burseries and everything else that I need to start. But I will attempt to get another post up again some time soon. I really want to reach the Christmas posts because well they are some of my favourite for this year!

Kris xx


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Taliesin lowered his quill and looked at the group sat in front of him. It felt so strange to him sometimes when he stood in front of a group of seventh years and remembered how they once were. Every year he seemed to find it strange that these students had reached that point already and for his current seventh years it seemed to have been quicker than usual.

He knew that kids grew up and he had watched many young wizards and witches mature from children into teenagers then into adults. It always made him feel old when he walked down Diagon Alley and saw somebody he had taught out in the real world. It made him feel even older if they introduced him to children they had.

He knew that he wasn't exactly old though. He was only forty three and for a wizard that was almost nothing. His father had been in his hundred's and Dumbledore was the same. But now he felt old. It was the fact that sitting there in the second row of his seventh year class was his own daughter. How could she possibly be eighteen already?

It felt like a trick of time. It felt as if somebody was playing a prank on him and at any moment a little three year old would come running in and that would be his Branwen. But no the truth was he didn't have a little girl anymore he had a beautiful woman for a daughter. And very soon she would be out facing the real world and all its dangers.

And it wouldn't be just her it would be all of them. That was why he took his subject matter very seriously. Why he worried about if they were really taking it in. And today he was worried more than he had been so far this term. Today was the last day of lessons. It was the last Friday of term, the 17th December. It was only eight days until Christmas and most of the students would be returning home in the morning.

"Okay class today is obviously the last lesson this term so I don't really want to move onto new material. So we'll start looking at the more complex curses and how to block them when we return in January."

He heard a few mutters and was almost sure that Sirius Black had muttered something about a free period to James Potter who was sat next to him. Taliesin looked round at the class. It had never struck him as odd the combination that had selected to carry the class onto N.E.W.T level. The eight Gryffindors were all in the class along with five Ravenclaws, four Hufflepuff and two Slytherin. For him it was a rather large class for the level.

"Today we are going to have a discussion. I know most of you will be returning home for the holidays and its no secret that there is a war taking place outside of these walls. That means that you will be entering a place of danger. I don't want to worry you but I want you all to understand that it is very important that you keep your wits about you. The only person who will be able to protect you out there is you."

The class had gone silent and he took that for a good sign.

"So we're going to talk about the attacks. I'm going to give some examples and I want to know what you think. So the first one. It's late at night and you've been down the local pub for a nice butterbeer –"

"Can we make it a fire whisky sir?"

Taliesin gave Nathan McCarthy, one of the Hufflepuff students a nod.

"You could have drunk anything. On the way home a Death Eater jumps out and attacks you. What would you do?"

"Scream."

Taliesin looked at Irene and gave a small nod.

"That's a good idea, it'll draw attention but the problem with that is that the Death Eater will try to hit you with something. What do you do?"

"One on one you defend yourself. You put up shield spells hoping that he isn't going to fling the killing curse at you. Then you fire curses back at him. But the ideal solution would be to either try to get help so that the Death Eater is out numbered or providing you are sober enough apparate out of there."

Taliesin gave a brief little smile towards Amanda.

"Correct you defend yourself and then try to get out of there. Second example for you all, a group of say three Death Eaters come upon you. You're on your own and there's no chance of anyone coming to your aid. What do you do?"

"Beg for mercy and hope they don't kill you?"

Peter's voice was low and James and Sirius laughed as if he had been joking. Taliesin looked at the boy and he felt that he had meant his words.

"You could try that Peter but it would make it more fun for them."

"You hit them with everything that you've got."

"Again that's a good idea James but you're out numbered its likely to end in your death."

"Make them believe that there are others with you. Fire off a couple of spells that can rebound so that it seems that they are coming from other directions. It might scare the Death Eaters if they think that there's a chance they'll be captured. Then you apparate out of there."

"Very good Amanda. What James suggested is a good idea and you'll die fighting for your life. But if you can distract them and get out of there the better. If you can fire a few spells good but if not just get out of there."

"I have one more for you before we finish. You and your friends have gone out for a meal. You're going back to someone's house for a few drinks before the night is out. You get there to find that there is an attack happening. What do you do?"

"Pretend you haven't seen it and leave."

Shaking his head Taliesin looked at Severus who seemed smug with his answer.

"Get help Sir?"

"That is a plan Trisha. But before you can leave the Death Eaters start firing on you."

The room was silent. Taliesin wondered if they were thinking of the attack in May when some had fought and others had hidden. Maybe they were beginning to panic about going home. His eye caught a hand rise into the air. His eyes went to Amanda as he gave her a little nod.

"Someone in the group would need to take charge. It wouldn't matter who it was but you'd need someone who had a clear idea. If it was me I would encourage the group to distract the Death Eaters somehow. I'd get them to split up and go to different locations so that the Death Eaters would have to spread out. It would be easier to take them on one at a time than in a group. I'd also want to get the group to use their strengths. You wouldn't necessarily need to fire hexes at the Death Eaters, use whatever spells are your strongest. But at the same time while the Death Eaters are distracted by the spread of the group it would be quite easy for one member to break away and go fetch help. Then all that would be needed would be to hold out until reinforcement gets there. If the Death Eaters think they're losing they'll leave because getting captured is the last thing that they would want to happen."

Taliesin smiled warmly.

"That would be a good idea. Okay I think we'll end things here today. So everybody enjoy Christmas and stay safe."

As the class stood up he cleared his throat once.

"Amanda a word before you leave."

He watched panic cross over her features as she said something to Alice. The classroom emptied and she stood at her desk with her bag on her shoulder. When the last student had left he gave her a warm smile.

"Nothing to fear Amanda I just want a quick chat."

"Yes Professor."

"I was just wondering if you've ever considered Auror training?"

She shook her head slowly.

"No Sir. Why?"

"If you don't mind me saying you have a logical way of thinking about these attacks Amanda. It's almost like you're thinking as a Death Eater yourself. The tactics you mentioned are the ones I've witnessed them using. It's a good talent to have these days and I'm sure Moody would be impressed."

"Thank you Professor. I'll think about it if that's okay."

Taliesin nodded and gave another smile.

"You better run along before the others think you're in trouble again."

She nodded and he watched as she walked outside. When she had left he walked to the door and bided his third year class to enter.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33

The train ride to Kings Cross had been uneventful. Students had been running up and down the aisles excited about the prospect of seeing family and the presents they were likely to receive in just a week. A festive feel had hung in the air. It was exciting and filled with happiness.

As they had pulled up children had dashed around the platform hugging loved ones and shouting 'Merry Christmas see you next term' to friends. Lily had watched in a detached sort of way. It felt strange to her this year. Maybe it was because it didn't feel like the Christmas' before.

Branwen had remained once more in Hogwarts. It had made sense since her father was spending the holiday there. Why ride the train to London only to have to floo back up the school, or apparate up to Hogsmeade? Frank and Joe were both working so neither were going to be able to make it to the station.

So for the first time it was just Lily, Remus, Peter, Sirius, Amanda, James and Alice walking off the train together. On the platform they had been met by Timothy Lupin. The man looked older and much more tired than Lily had ever seen him. But he had rushed over to embrace Remus in a way that fathers and sons do. He had spoken to them all briefly before explaining that Hannah his wife was working since it was the Saturday before Christmas and robes were a common present.

They had all said goodbye to Remus and watched him leave as they had looked around the platform. Peter made a funny noise and rushed over to a corner. His mother Chloe had been stood there. But unlike with Timothy she made no attempt to look at them or anything. Peter simply turned and waved before heading off.

The group was almost small as they made their way towards the entrance to the muggle platforms. But before they had reached it they had heard a voice. They all turned to find Jacqueline Potter stood waiting.

She was smiling and hugged them all as she spoke happily to them. Lily couldn't help but grin as she listened to the plans she had in store for them all. The woman followed by Alice, Amanda and Sirius stepped through the barrier. Before Lily could she felt James take her hand.

"Before we go through can we just talk?"

"Sure James what's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's just my mum doesn't know about us yet and I don't want to do this in front of her."

Lily smiled as he leaned forward and gently kissed her lips. It was the sort of kiss she had been experiencing for a month. Gentle and tender yet emotion of some kind behind it. When they pulled apart she couldn't help but grin.

"I'm going to miss you these next two weeks."

James gave her a little nod.

"You could always come over and visit. Mum wouldn't mind I think she's under the impression that it's the more the merrier. That's why she's convinced Sirius and Amanda to come over."

Lily gave a little laugh.

"Maybe I will. It depends on dad."

"Tell him Merry Christmas from me."

"I will."

They stepped through the barrier and Lily waved her friends goodbye before heading towards the underground. Muggle transport was easy for her and the journey to Pa's house would be a very short one from the station.

* * *

I know this one is short. I have plans for Christmas but I realised that there was a bit of a jump between the last chapter and Christmas. And then I wondered if I'd actually explained where they were going to be for Christmas. So really this chapter is setting things up for the next five. Which I'm hoping you're going to like. Because I do and they've been written for about six months before this one!

Kris xx


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

The wind whistled as the merry group laughed from around the cosy fire. Outside the blanket of snow muffled all movements.

"If it's all right with you I think I'll head up to bed."

Amanda stretched as she stood from the chair. She was aware that Sirius was watching her closely. She flashed him a charming smile as Jacqueline spoke up.

"That's a good idea. I think we should all turn in."

"But mum its only midnight."

"And since tomorrow is Christmas Day you and Sirius will both be up early."

Alice giggled as the two boys shared a look before nodding in agreement. The small group bided goodnight and headed upstairs…

***

"Are you seeing Frank tomorrow?"

Alice slipped her head into the t-shirt she had chosen to wear to bed. She didn't reply as she pulled her head through the material. When her eyes were clear and connecting to Amanda's she gave a short little nod and as her lips became clear she was smiling.

"He's invited me round for tea."

"For tea. So that means you'll be here for most of the day then."

"Yep."

Amanda gave a soft sigh as she pulled the blankets back from her bed.

"Mand is there anything wrong?"

"I hope not."

"Mand?"

"I think Sirius is hiding something from me. And it's got me rather worried. I mean what if he's changed his mind about us? What if he wants to break up?"

"Mand there's no way he's going to break up with you. He's in love."

"Really do you think that?"

Alice scrunched her noise up as she sat on the edge of her bed.

"Do you mean he hasn't told you?"

Amanda shook her head a little.

"No. He's never said that he loves me. But then I've never told him either."

"But you do love him don't you."

"More than anything in the world. It's just –"

Amanda's words died in her throat. Her eyes locked with Alice's as they both stood from the bed. A piercing scream had sliced through the silent house. It was a scream that both had heard before and a scream that they knew could only mean one thing…

***

"What's going on with you Sirius?"

"Don't know what you mean."

James pulled his quilt up to his chin before rolling onto his side. His best friend was stood at the foot of the second bed rummaging through his trunk. He stood at an odd angle and he had been acting odd for most of the day.

"You've been acting funny all week. If I didn't know better I'd think you're hiding something."

The boy stiffened a moment and James knew what that meant.

"You are hiding something! What is it?"

"Nothing."

Sirius was rummaging through his trunk again and James suddenly had a thought. The boy had been giving Amanda little glances for days. He was besotted with his girlfriend and James suddenly felt sure of what the secret was.

"You're going to propose to Amanda aren't you?"

"WHAT?"

Sirius spun around with a panicked look in his eyes.

"Why would I propose to Mand? We haven't even been dating a year? I haven't even managed to tell her that I love her yet!"

"You haven't told her that you love her."

James sat up and looked at his friend.

"I can't get the words out."

"So you're not proposing."

"No."

The boy looked around as he closed his trunk.

"The big secret is that I've bought myself a motorbike."

"A what?"

Sirius kicked his socks off and started to unbuckle his belt as he spoke.

"It's a muggle form of transport. It has two wheels and an engine. I bought it off Berty Proudfoot –"

"You've been ripped off then!"

Sirius barked a laugh as he undid his shirt buttons.

"It flies too! I thought that we could take it out for a test run after dinner tomorrow."

James couldn't reply to that. As he opened his mouth to say that tomorrow might not be the best day a scream thundered through the house. He knew the voice belonged to his mother and the sound gave him Goosebumps. He was out of bed and at the door before the scream stopped…

***

The four youngsters met at the top of the stairs. They were all in states of undress. Some much worse than others. While Alice wore an over-sized t-shirt that had once belonged to Frank, Amanda was in a pair of Sirius' old boxers and a vest top. James was dressed in a pair of sweat pants and Sirius had only his boxers and the half buttoned shirt. Yet at the top of those stairs they didn't think about that, they were too busy taking in the situation on the floor below.

To the untrained eye they looked like a bunch of teenagers about to be swallowed by trouble. But the five men stood in the lobby knew better than that. They knew that they had already underestimated the youngster's determination and ability to fight in the May. They were not going to make the same mistake twice.

The lead Death Eater didn't spare them a glance as he flung a hex at the woman facing him on the stairs. His task tonight would be the biggest one he'd been solely in charge of. Tom Riddle or Voldemort as he was now informed to call him wanted everyone in this house dead. He knew that would be a difficult task. Four of the inhabitants might be teenagers and the fifth an aging witch who hadn't been active in any field for over fifty years. But he had learnt the hard way that determination can take you a long way.

William Malfoy understood perfectly the reasons why these people were being targeted. The new 'lower' followers that he had with him were unaware of why they were there. To them this was a bit of sport. A way to practice a technique they were still learning about. He understood the implications of the actions. This wasn't random like the other attacks of late. This had been considered long and hard. They had considered who would do the attacking. William had been chosen because he was the best hand to hand dueller. Something he was extremely proud of.

He dodged a yellow spell that the old woman threw at him without much problem. He was here because today's students were tomorrow's adults, tomorrow's fighters. They didn't care really on the whole about that. But there were a few students who were already showing what they would be doing when out in the real world. And they had already caused them a lot of problems. This was a chance to take out the most persistent in the fight.

They had discussed that issue too. Who would be the most dangerous to them? It was decided relatively easily that those who had already felt loss to the Dark Lord. So they were targeting them. On this night there were to be two targets, James Potter and Sirius Black. They knew that the second boy would be spending Christmas with the first and it would be a quick and easy way to kill two birds with one stone.

Was William surprised that the two girls were there? Not at all. Amanda Dixon, his own niece and her friend Alice Scott were wanted dead too. So if they were all together that made it more convenient for him. He wouldn't have to hunt them down. Kill all four and the old lady in one night. He couldn't help but grin as a blue wisp left his wand. He would be rewarded for killing all five. Yes that would do him…

Below on the ground floor the Death Eaters finally came to life. They aimed their wands at the landing and curses were fired. Sirius quickly fired a shielding spell as he grabbed Alice and threw her on the floor below him. The white cloud brushed just above their heads. The four youngsters still flat on the floor glanced at each other.

"What do we do?"

Alice's voice sounded meek and held a bit of a quiver at the end.

"We need to help mum."

James was panicked. The pitch of his voice made him sound thirteen again. In any other situation Sirius would have pointed that out laughing. But not now. His mind was focused on the spells that were coming at them. Jacqueline was still in single combat with the Death Eater on the stairs. She needed help, they needed to fight.

Before he could say something they saw Amanda go into a crouch and run back along the landing towards the bedroom. James didn't look away from his mother but Sirius and Alice shared a look. He started to grumble. What the hell was she playing at? This was serious and she was running away. He had never taken Amanda for someone who would do that. He had always thought she would stand up and fight.

He felt slightly relieved when she returned only moments later but then puzzlement took over. She had her broom and James' with her. She couldn't really want a game of Quidditch in this situation. He watched as she moved over and nudged James trying to hand him his broom.

"Mand what's with the brooms?"

She glanced at Sirius as another spell flew over their heads.

"We need to draw the fire of the Death Eaters on the ground floor. Up here it's too difficult. James and I are use to quick flying and dodging things. So we fly around the room. That draws their attention to us and they'll leave themselves open for attack from anyone on the landing."

"That's brilliant!"

She grinned at Sirius looking at Alice.

"The two of you will have to be quick. They'll probably cotton on what we are doing after the first hit. James and I will try to fire from the air too but it'll be down to you two mostly."

Alice nodded as Amanda straddled her broom. James seemed to snap out of his reserve and followed suit. The pair kicked off and started to zoom around the place. They were over the banister and in the open within seconds.

Instantly just as Amanda had predicted spells came at them. But Amanda and James thanks to so many years of training were well practiced at dodging dangerous things in the air. Sirius watched as Amanda went into a step dive almost knocking one of the Death Eaters to the floor. James meanwhile was making his broom somersault causing the Death Eater aiming at him to connect with the wall behind. Sirius exchanged a look with Alice and with a smile he took his first proper aim at the Death Eaters below.

***

"AVADA KEDAVRA!"

***

Amanda turned to see the fatal spell strike. A scream died in her throat as with horror she stumbled backwards. As the body hit the floor it looked as though somebody had cut the strings on the puppet. Jacqueline's eyes were glazed over and the Death Eater turned from her on the stairs and looked up at her. She dodged another spell as in horror she felt the tears stir in her eyes. Her mind was screaming not again to her. She had seen people die before and she always hated it. But not today, not on Christmas and not Jacqueline Potter.

A scream bounced off the walls in the room. Spells stopped flying for a moment as everyone watched James dive at the Death Eater who had killed his mother. The intruder didn't seem to care as he batted the young man off his broom with a simple pink coloured spell. Amanda watched as the boy tumbled before stopping inches from his mother. He crawled towards her and grabbed her body close.

Amanda didn't think as she watched the Death Eater raise his wand. She knew what he would plan to do. She hated having this ability to think like them. Yes it would be an advantage, Ddraig had said as much during the Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons, but that didn't mean she had to like it.

Without thinking she reacted. She angled her broom at the stairs and went into a dive. She fired a warning spell at the Death Eater which brushed across his shoulder. If it had hit him it would have caused his arm to go stiff and numb. Instead his shoulder dropped a little. But that was all she needed.

Throwing herself from her broom she stretched her hand out towards her friend. Her fingers closed around his bare foot and she closed her eyes hard. An image of a small village covered in snow on the outskirts of their school came to mind. Then the pressure began to build and with a pop she was gone…

***

Sirius watched the scene in silence. His wand lay uselessly at his side. The woman cut down on those stairs had been like a mother to him. She had been so much better than his own. He had loved her and called her mum. His grief was in that moment as raw as James' was. He watched as the boy as good as his own brother fell from his broom and landed next to their mother. Then with the tears already in his eyes he watched his girlfriend jump from her broom and heard the pop.

He was so intent in watching the scene along with everyone else he didn't noticed Alice take his arm. He didn't feel her grip tighten as Amanda dived from her broom at James. He didn't realise as he watched Amanda, James and the body of Jacqueline Potter vanish that a pressure was starting to build around him. He didn't even notice as the scene around him faded away to nothing…


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

Alice opened her eyes as the pressure gave way. She felt bile in her mouth and turned to spit it out. She knew that they were at war; she understood that people were dying. She had lost so much personally. But yet that had been her first 'battle'. That had been the first person she had actually seen die. It felt more real now than it had before for some reason. Maybe that was stupid. But she hadn't actually thought about the killing act itself. Yes she knew that it happened but she hadn't imagined how quick it was, how there was no screaming from the victim. The way they just fell to the floor. Did it happen that way for her family?

Her body started to shake and it was only partly down to the cold air that was now hitting her body. Was it always like that? Was every battle as quick, as deadly, as unrehearsed? She had always pictured battles to be like a play. Where everyone knew their part from the beginning. She had felt lost. Sure she had quickly gotten into the routine but she hadn't a clue what she was suppose to be firing. It was only luck she felt that had gotten her out of there alive. She was no better than Jacqueline when it came to fighting. It was just the luck of the draw who walked away and who was carried out.

Alice jumped as a strong pair of arms wrapped around her. She felt a small increase of heat but mostly she felt safe. She thought that almost strange. Never before had she thought that she would ever feel safe or comforted from anyone other than Frank. Yet in those seconds where she stood alone with Sirius she felt entirely safe with him. As if she knew that nothing would hurt her in those moments together.

"Where are we?"

His voice was filled with raw emotion. She felt like an intruder to his feelings in that moment. But his words brought her back to where she was. Suddenly she understood where she was and why she was there. She turned her head and looked at Sirius. She refused to move and felt a little selfish. Sirius probably needed a hug.

"This is the Longbottom house. I thought of Frank and here we are. It should be safe."

She turned now in his arms and hugged him. He felt odd to her. In all their years of friendship she'd never hugged Sirius before. He felt as solid as Frank did. He was as strong. But he was taller than Frank and her head didn't rest as nicely on his shoulder. His arms tightened around her and they just stood like that for moments.

"Whoever's out there better go away before I fire!"

Alice jumped a little. Had they been talking that loudly to wake someone inside? She raised her eyes and saw a window open. An old man had his head poking out of the window. A night cap covered his head but his large pointed ears stuck out from under them.

"I'm looking for Frank."

"Come back in the morning then."

"Please. Tell him its Alice."

She moved from the hug she was sharing with Sirius and walked towards the door. The pair started to knock on it. They were very loud. Inside they heard the man yelling at somebody. Then footsteps sounded towards the door. They were quick as if someone was running. The door bounced open and Frank stood there in his stripy pyjamas looking very tired, but there was something else on his face.

"Alice what's wrong?"

She threw her arms around Frank and felt the tears fall from her eyes. His arms came around her waist and she was lifted from the ground. She guessed that Sirius was with them as she silently sobbed into the mans shoulder. The click of the door closing was a relief. She was safe. Voices floated into the room and she felt exposed. With a sniff she pulled her head off of Frank's shoulder.

"What are you two doing here? And wearing those!"

Aunt Enid. Alice had met her a few times in the café. Alice knew that she was in an old t-shirts of Franks and for the first time she took in Sirius' dress. Boxers and an unbuttoned shirt. That proved to her how quickly the attack had come on. Nobody had expected it and they hadn't been ready. Sirius looked out of place and Alice reached over taking his hand. It was just starting to dawn on her that he had lost somebody that night as well as James. She knew that Sirius had lived with James for a long time. He had lost his own mother.

"Let's go sit down."

Augusta had appeared from the stairs followed by Victor. She had a pink dressing gown wrapped around her body as she placed her hand on Sirius' back and pushed them into a comfy sitting area. There were large sofas that Alice happily sat on. Sirius sat next to her. His expression was back to pensive and she began to worry about him. Frank sat on the coffee table in front of the sofa and looked at the pair of them. She knew that he had a look of somebody expecting the worse. No wonder he knew the pair of them better than the four adults.

A hot drink was pushed into her hand but she ignored it as Aunt Enid and the man from earlier, Uncle Algie looked at her. Augusta silently took an armchair and Victor sat on the arm. However it was Frank that spoke up.

"The pair of you look like crap. What's happened?"

Sirius was holding Alice's hand so tightly she thought he might break her hand. But he didn't make any attempt to speak. Alice took a deep breath and looked straight at Frank as if he were the only person in the room.

"There was a Death Eater attack. Jacqueline is dead."

She heard gasps from around them but her eyes stayed with Frank as he spoke softly to her.

"How many?"

"Umm… I'm not sure. There was one on the stairs. That was the one that killed Jacqueline. But there must have been four or five down in the lobby area as well. Sirius how many?"

She shook his hand breaking him from his thoughts.

"What?"

"How many Death Eaters."

"Five in the lobby and one on the stairs."

Frank nodded at him. His eyes went back to Alice once more.

"They killed Jacqueline Potter. But what about James and Amanda? They were staying there too. I saw them earlier."

For the first time since leaving Alice thought of them. Her eyes went wide and she felt sick. She hadn't thought of them. No wonder Sirius was like he was. His 'mother' was dead and his 'brother' and girlfriend were now missing. She closed her eyes and tried to recall what had happened. She hadn't been watching them though. As soon as Jacqueline went down she crawled to where Sirius was and took his arm. Maybe they were still there.

"I don't know. They might still be there!"

She began to panic. She felt sick again. But before Frank could jump up and organise a search party Sirius was speaking in a monotone.

"James dived at the Death Eater who killed her. He was knocked from his broom –"

"Why was he on his broom?"

They all ignored Aunt Enid.

"I saw him crawl to her. Then Mand hit the Death Eater with something and jumped off her broom –"

"Why were they on brooms?"

Again Aunt Enid was ignored.

"Then Amanda disapparated them away. They left before we did. Don't know where but they're somewhere else."

Frank placed his hand over his mouth and looked at Alice and Sirius for a moment. Then he stood up and spoke to the room at large.

"I need to get to the ministry. The Aurors need to know about this."

"But it's Christmas Frank."

He turned to his mother and must have given her a look but Alice couldn't see what because his back was to her.

"A woman is dead. Doesn't matter to the Death Eaters if it's Christmas or not. I'll have to go to Moody. He'll want to know about this. I'll tell him what you've said. He'll probably want to speak to the pair of you too mind."

Alice watched as Frank pulled a cloak over his pyjamas. This was too urgent for him to dress by the looks of it. Her stomach gave a little jolt and she realised that she wanted to protest. She didn't want Frank to leave her. She was safe as long as he was close by. She was still shaking with the grief and all she wanted was for Frank to take her into his arms and tell her that everything was fine. That she was safe and nobody would hurt her.

He must have sensed some of her feelings because he moved over to her. She managed to get Sirius to leave her hand go and she stood wrapping her arms around him. He kissed her forehead in a protective manner and she knew that he would be back. Then she watched as he started up the fire and was gone. She dropped down on the seat and Sirius' arm went around her shoulder. She leaned in on him waiting for Frank to return.

***

"The pair of you should really go to bed."

"Maybe she took him to my place. She'd feel safe there."

It had been two hours since they had gotten to the Longbottom house. It was close to three in the morning but neither wanted to go to bed. Alice felt exhausted. But every time she closed her eyes she saw Jacqueline. Sirius had moved on in emotions and was now worried about Amanda and James.

"Sirius Black you are going nowhere but bed."

Augusta was determined but he didn't move. She knew that he wouldn't check his house because she wouldn't have gone there. They felt certain that if she hadn't gone to Hogwarts she'd be in St. Mungos. Neither though wanted to leave the warmth of the fire to see. Sirius had stood on several attempts but never made it passed the woman in the pink robe.

"Bed."

Alice cuddled close to Sirius and watched the flames dance in the fire place.

***

"Merry Christmas."

Alice watched as Joe, Anton and Kyle walked into the sitting room. It was the tradition now that they would spend Christmas Day with the Longbottoms. They all stopped when they saw her and Sirius sat on the sofa. Sirius had dozed off about twenty minutes earlier and startled to wake.

"Is Frank back? Are they safe?"

"Not yet."

Her voice sounded strange to her. It was strained and lined with exhaustion. Alice watched as the two older Wild boys spoke to Augusta but Joe came straight over to them.

"What's happened?"

There was no use pretending. Joe knew just as Frank had that something had happened. Alice took a small breath and explained everything to him. His eyes widened and she heard him mutter something he shouldn't. Then he dropped down on the other side of her to wait for news. Before the silence took over though he spoke to Sirius.

"I'm sure she's okay mate."

The two boys looked over Alice's head. She didn't need to see the look. She knew what it was. It was a look of a man in love. A man who was worried beyond words about the woman he couldn't imagine a future without. Alice couldn't help the small smile. It felt like a lifetime ago that she and Amanda had been in the bedroom talking. Amanda had wondered if Sirius was going to break up with her. But Alice had said he loved her. She wondered if finally the two would say those words when reunited.

***

"You two need to get some sleep."

"No thank you."

Sirius was being over polite. Alice shared a look with Joe. They both knew how annoyed he was with Augusta for repeating the statement over and over all the time. He didn't want to sleep he wanted to get out there.

The clock chimed indicating that it was nine o'clock. Frank had been gone now for six hours. Alice wasn't worried though. He would have spoken to Moody and probably been to the house to see the damage. He may even have found Amanda and James. He would be back soon.

"Do you think it's too early for a brandy?"

All eyes went to Uncle Algie as he poured himself a sizeable helpful. But something about Augusta's look must have made him think twice because he put it down. Silence took over again. It was strange. Today it was Christmas Day. Yet nobody in the house seemed excited, all presents had been abandoned as they sat quietly. The only two people occupied were Augusta and Aunt Enid who were making dinner.

A bang brought everyone's attention to the fireplace. Frank stepped out followed instantly by Alastor Moody. The old Auror looked around the room and his gaze stayed on her

"Miss Scott, Mr Black I need to speak to you about last night –"

"Frank?"

Sirius' voice was tight and Alice knew that he needed to know before he would be able to speak. Frank was across the room in a few strides and had Sirius on his feet.

"The pair of them are at Hogwarts. They're entirely safe and are perfectly fine considering what has happened."

Alice watched as Sirius hugged Frank. She herself was hugging Joe. Tears fled her eyes and she didn't know why.

"I'm going to Hogwarts."

"You need to answer my questions."

"Then you need to sleep and have some dinner. Maybe not in that order!"

They all looked at Augusta. Sirius gave her a funny smile.

"I'll answer the questions then I'm off to Hogwarts."

Frank stepped in though.

"You should have some food here first mate. James doesn't want to stay there so Amanda was going to take him to Lily's when I left. Then she said something about going to tell Remus and Peter."

"But –"

"You can see her later Sirius you need some food first."

Alice looked around the room and felt the tears slide over her cheeks. Another death, another day ruined. And yet once more they were forced to continue because that's all they could do. Life doesn't stop with every death and they had gotten use to that idea.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

The snow felt soft and yet solid under Amanda's bare skin. Her chest was rising and falling in quick motions and she tried to steady her breathing. It was next to impossible though. The adrenaline rush was like something out of a Quidditch game. She felt alive, more alive than she had in weeks. And yet she knew that someone else would never feel that way again. That more than anything brought her back to the present.

Slowly she rolled onto her back and closed her eyes. Her arm felt at a strange angle and that was when she realised she was still clutching James' foot. Gently she released her grip and brought both hands to her eyes.

It was dark in the village. There were no lights which wasn't that odd considering it must be around one in the morning. She knew the pub closed early on Christmas Eve because most people were at home with their families. The only source of light was the pale moon and the stars. They seemed so bright from where she laid and it was almost like being back in Astronomy lessons again.

A shiver ran through her body as the snow began to melt through her almost non-existent clothing. It didn't help that the air was still with a bitter chill. After what felt a lifetime she turned and looked to her left. James lying on top of his mother's body. Like her he was barely dressed and she could see the Goosebumps all along his back and onto his arms. Her brain was starting to function again and although the last thing she wanted to do was to get up and move, or try to move James she realised that they would freeze unless she did something.

She quietly muttered a warming charm around them, but it didn't give her much comfort. Maybe it was because it wasn't just the cold that was freezing them. Silently she watched as her friend who had always been so strong broke down. His sobs were rocking his body as he clutched to his mother. She wanted to help him, to hold him in her arms and give him some sort of comfort. Yet she couldn't bring herself to.

Instead she needed to be useful. She needed to get Dumbledore. She needed him to sort this out. To help her get James into Hogwarts, into the safety that only the school could bring anymore. But she couldn't leave him there. What if the Death Eaters thought to come here? He wouldn't be able to fight. It would be down to her. There was only one thing she could think to do.

She stood up and started to yell.

"HELP! PLEASE WE NEED HELP!"

She walked a little way from James and yelled some more. The people in the village surely would hear her; she had never been considered a quiet person. As her yells became more frantic lights went on around her. She watched as windows were opened and people looked out. She knew they could make her out stood in the snow and that they would see the boy on the floor sobbing.

Knowing that she had done everything she could Amanda felt the need to protect James from the stares. She knew that people would very quickly work out what had happened. Dropping once more onto the snow she gently placed her hand on James' back. He was freezing despite her charm.

She was unsure of what to do for the best which for her was a rare thing. So she ran her hand along James' back onto his shoulder. She wrapped her other hand under his stomach to form a sort of shielding hug. Then lowering her head onto his back she held him. She could feel his sobs and she gently spoke comforting words. She didn't know if he understood a word of what she said but it didn't matter. It was a comfort to herself.

She heard a door on their left open and footsteps in the snow.

"What's happened?"

It was Rosmerta's voice. She'd know it anywhere. She lost count of the number of times that voice had asked her what she would like to drink. The number of times that voice had laughed at a joke that they were telling or at a prank they were telling her about. It was a soothing voice. But now it held something that sounded foreign to it. Amanda heard the gasp as she rested her head on James' back trying to hold back any tears that were threatening. She needed to be strong, now wasn't the time to cry.

She felt like a small child being caught doing something naughty. She didn't think about being an adult and being strong. All she could think of was holding onto James. His body rocking sobs kept her mind from closing down. She needed to keep her head for James' sake. Yet she was so caught up in the two of them that she was ignorant to those around them. She knew that there were people there but she didn't know that Ambrosius Flume the owner of Honeydukes had called for someone to fetch Dumbledore. She didn't know that somebody was at that moment running up to Hogwarts.

She was only brought back to the present when someone's hands came around her body.

"Let me go!"

Her voice sounded odd to her. But the one that spoke back was soft and comforting.

"Come on dear let's go inside the pub. It's warmer in there."

Rosmerta wasn't going to take no for an answer. She gripped Amanda's arm and pulled her up off of James. She felt that she was leaving her friend exposed now. First to the cold and secondly to all those stood around. But she had no choice but to be guided into the pub by the older woman. However Amanda did turn to see James. The owner of the Hogs Head was trying to pull him off the body of Jacqueline. James didn't give up easily though and started to fight. As she was pulled inside the bar she saw the owner of Zonkos run over to help the old man pull James up from the ground. Then the door closed.

Rosmerta directed Amanda to a chair and she fell into it without much help. Now that she felt safe the exhaustion was starting to hit her. She had been tired before the attack; it had been her idea to go to bed in the first place. All she wanted to do was put her head down and sleep. But she knew that it would be many hours before she found rest. She wouldn't rest until James had.

It felt like hours before the door opened again and he was led in by the Hogs Head man. James looked very reluctant but the old man was steering him in with some purpose. Amanda noticed that James' eyes were red and puffy and felt her stomach jolt. She had never seen James this way before, it was like looking at a different person. Even after his fathers death he hadn't reacted this way, but then he hadn't witnessed that.

A thought suddenly hit Amanda making her feel sick. When Henry Potter had died Amanda had been dating James. She had been the one who had comforted him following the discovery. She had spoken soft words to him and spent weeks helping him overcome his grief. It was happening again. It was her and James alone and she was the one who would end up having to comfort him following his mother's death. The universe had a strange way of bringing them together. Amanda was beginning to feel like the mother of the group. And that was a very strange feeling.

She was jolted from her thoughts as she was pulled to her feet by James. She had been lost in her thoughts and hadn't noticed him run towards her. His hug was fierce and she was sure that she would be left with bruises. But she didn't care. She wrapped her arms around him again and held him as tightly as she could. His head dropped to her shoulder and she heard his sobs again.

They dropped to the floor at some point and Amanda just held him. She rubbed his back and spoke soft soothing words. The tears were sat in her own eyes and yet she wouldn't let them fall. She wanted to be strong for James. She wanted to help him and her own tears would only hinder that.

She didn't know how long they were sat like that. She didn't notice as the Hogs Head man and the Honeyduke and Zonko owners carried Jacqueline passed them up stairs to a private room. She was unaware that the pub was filling up with locals or that Rosmerta was handing out drinks to steady nerves. She didn't know that there were people crying around them at the sight of them comforting each other. She didn't even know that Dumbledore had arrived.

The man looked at them and walked up the stairs. Amanda was ignorant to this. But finally she looked up and her dark brown eyes connected with blues ones that usually twinkled. It was the stoic look in those that caused the first tear to brush against her lashes. James didn't look up at the man. His eyes had closed and his sobs had become silent but his body still shook with emotion. Amanda held him tightly as she looked at the man.

She watched as the man walked towards them. His movements were silent as she stroked James' hair. The Headmaster stopped and spoke to everyone who called to him as he crossed the room. They wanted to know what had happened. Wanted to know the identity. She was sure he was telling them that it was Jacqueline Potter and explaining James to them. But that was all.

In a silent movement Dumbledore lowered himself onto the floor next to them. It didn't feel at all strange for the man to be in flowing blue robes on the floor. If it had been anyone else maybe it would have been odd but not Dumbledore. When he spoke his words were very soft and Amanda knew nobody else would hear them.

"I need to know exactly what happened."

It was Amanda who found the strength to relate the truth. She didn't mind having to retell it. She needed to repeat what had happened to digest it. She found it easier to talk about it now. She knew that if she didn't she wouldn't have any rest. But she followed Dumbledore's example and spoke in such a soft voice that it didn't sound like hers.

"We'd just gone to bed when Jacqueline screamed. The four of us ran to the landing. There was one Death Eater on the stairs fighting Jacqueline and another five down in the lobby. I got mine and James' brooms and we flew drawing the attentions while Sirius and Alice fired spells. Then Jacqueline got hit. James was knocked off his broom and was holding her. I didn't think I hit the Death Eater with a numbing spell, caught his shoulder, and jumped at James. I brought him here."

When she stopped she noticed the look on Dumbledore's face. He looked slightly troubled and it was odd to see that on him. He usually had the answers and what he found out was something that just backed up a theory he already had. That didn't seem to be the case this time.

"What happened to Alice and Sirius?"

Amanda opened her mouth but nothing came out. Alice and Sirius. They had slipped her mind completely. She had left her friend and boyfriend to fight Death Eaters. She knew that James needed to be removed from there but she should have thought of them. The tears were falling from her eyes now for a moment.

"I don't know Sir. I just grabbed James and left. You don't think they're still there do you?"

Now she felt panicked. What if they'd been killed? She'd never forgive herself if they had. What if she would never see Sirius again? She hadn't even told him she loved him. No she couldn't lose him now. She couldn't. She loved him; she was planning to spend forever with him. But what if her actions had caused the Death Eaters to kill them.

Dumbledore's hand came to her shoulder and his words were soft still.

"I'm sure they are fine. They probably left just as you did."

Amanda wanted to believe Dumbledore and she would have if there hadn't been something in his voice that sounded worried. She watched as he stood up and headed back over to a few people. She watched him speak to Rosmerta and the Hogs Head man. They seemed to agree on something and then the two men left and Rosmerta came over to them.

"Albus has gone to the house to check if Alice and Sirius are there and his brother has gone to see the Aurors."

Her words were soft and comforting. James didn't react but Amanda's brain took one word in. Brother. Aberforth Dumbledore, of course, they had the same eyes. In other conditions she would have wondered over the fact that he was the owner of the Hogs Head. But now wasn't the time. Now she silently continued to hold tightly to James soothing him. All the while her stomach was knotted with worry over Sirius. Where was he?

The bar was beginning to fill up with villagers. They had heard commotion and had decided to come and discover what was happening for themselves. Amanda felt that they could have the decency not to stare at the two of them. But she knew they were the best entertainment and gossip for the village now. Rosmerta placed a bottle of firewhisky on the table next to them with two glasses. Amanda looked at them but left it unopened. Drinking wasn't a good idea yet.

***

The time seemed not to alter and yet in reality it was flying by. The attack took place around midnight and it was getting close to five o'clock. James had gone silent and Amanda wondered if he was sleeping. She didn't like to check though. She wouldn't be surprised if he were though because she felt he probably wore himself out with crying.

The pub had gotten quiet as most people had headed back to their homes. A small group though remained sat in the corner with Rosmerta. Maybe they thought that the Death Eaters might track the two of them and that it was security thing. Or possibly they were the noisy ones in the neighbourhood who were waiting for the Aurors.

Amanda had been wondering for hours about the Aurors. They must have been to the house now. Aberforth was likely there too along with Dumbledore. She worried that maybe Sirius and Alice had remained behind and their bodies were being viewed now. Or maybe they had gotten away and the two Dumbledore's would be searching for them. She liked that idea best.

She tried to work out where they would have gone. She had wondered if maybe they would have picked Hogsmeade too. But that hadn't been the choice. Maybe Sirius had taken Alice to his house. She had wondered about checking it out. But James was heavy and she didn't want to move him. Plus she felt certain Dumbledore had ordered Rosmerta to keep them there.

The sound of movement drew her attention and she watched as the door opened and closed. Her eyes did a double take as Frank came rushing into the pub. He was in a pair of striped pyjamas with a black cloak over it. His eyes were scanning the room and then they were on her. The grey sparkled with relief as he came running over.

"Amanda! James! Thank Merlin!"

He sounded as tired as she felt. It was strange hearing his voice. The pub had been silent for hours, at least towards her and James. The space between him and them shortened and then he was on the floor in front of them. His arms wrapped around the two of them and she felt his lips on her head.

"Have you been to the house?"

The two looked at James. It was the first thing he had said in hours. In fact it startled Amanda that he was still awake.

"Nothing there mate, well except the Dark Mark."

A silence loomed over them as the door opened again. Amanda saw Moody enter followed by the two Dumbledore's. But she turned back to Frank again.

"Any sign of Alice and Sirius at the house?"

He looked a little puzzled a second before giving a very brief and soft laugh that sounded odd to everyone in the pub.

"They turned up at my mum's house about half twelve. I went straight to Moody and got to the house. They're both fine. A little shocked and grieving. But not injured."

Amanda smiled for what felt the first time in years. Frank's attention was back on James.

"Listen mate I'm really sorry. If there's anything you need at all you let me know okay. We're all in this together remember."

James gave a little nod as Alastor Moody made his way over to them.

"Right you two I need you to tell me everything. Let's see why don't we go upstairs."

Amanda was about to protest when Albus Dumbledore leaned in and said something. She knew what he would be saying. Jacqueline's body was still upstairs. Moody gave a nod and looked in a corner.

"Okay then. Frank help them up and over into the corner. We'll talk there…"

***

It was hours that they spent in that corner talking. Amanda repeated things so many times that she felt they would be engraved on her brain. James too spoke. His words were raspy and barely audible. Yet Moody understood everything. It was close to eight when the questioning finished. Amanda felt drained. She wanted to sleep. Yet she was sure there was a lot more she would have to do before she would have that luxury.

"I think it might be best if I take them up to the school. Alastor do you agree?"

Moody was moving on to question the villagers about their arrival. He turned and looked at the Headmaster and gave a nod.

"Yes. That might be best. Longbottom you help get them up there."

Amanda smiled at Frank as she stood up. Her legs felt like jelly. Dumbledore took hold of James and helped him up. Frank's arms went around Amanda's shoulders and she rested her head against his chest. The four in silence walked up towards the castle. Her eyes kept closing and she knew that if Frank hadn't been supporting her she'd have fallen on her face.

They reached the gates before she realised. They opened and they were ushered inside. She heard the word hospital wing and an argument from James. Then they were outside the common room. The portrait opened and they were led inside. Dumbledore had left and she was sat on the armchair with Frank while James was laid out on the sofa.

She felt like she would sleep but then James brought her round.

"What if they targeted Lily? I need to get over there!"

"They haven't mate. I checked already."

"Is she okay?"

"I didn't go in. The house was silent and there was no mark. It's only your house that has been targeted."

"I need to see her."

Amanda rubbed her eyes looking at him.

"Okay. I'll take you to Lily."

"I can take myself."

"James."

She said it softly and he understood what she was hinting at. He wasn't in any shape to use magic. Frank though stroked her hair and said softly.

"You're practically sleeping Mand. You should sleep."

"No I'll go to Remus and Peter and tell them before they find out through the radio or a newspaper. And then I can go back and get James and bring him back here."

"What are you doing here?"

They all looked up to see Branwen on the stairs. The clock chimed nine and they jumped. Frank was up and talking to her quickly as Amanda moved over to James.

"Are you sure you want to go now. Maybe you should get some sleep."

"I need to see that she's okay Mand. They've taken one person I love from me; I want to make sure they haven't taken two."

Looking up at Frank she gave a little nod. Standing they headed to the portrait hole. Branwen was with them in seconds. She was holding James crying softly.

"I'm so sorry James."

"Thanks."

"Where are you going?"

"Lily's."

"But –"

Amanda broke in.

"We'll be back tonight. We can sort everything out then."

As they walked down the marble stairs Branwen turned into a side passage to head to her father. She would tell him that they had gone so he could inform Dumbledore. As they reached the gates Frank spoke up.

"You should come for lunch. Mum isn't going to let Alice or Sirius leave until she's fed them up."

James gave him a little head shake.

"I'm staying with Lily."

Amanda though smiled gently.

"Food. My stomach thinks my throats been cut. Dinner will be good."

Then with pops they were gone.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37

Lily stumbled at the top of the stairs. A small smile spread to her lips as she caught the banister and righted herself. Sometimes it was funny when she stumbled or tripped because it reminded her of being so much younger. She didn't seem to trip so much these days, even in her high heels! As she reached the bottom few steps she jumped and landed lightly as though a child jumping from a swing.

"Who's that?"

"Just me Pa!"

She walked into the kitchen to find her grandfather at the table with a cup of tea and toast. The oven was on and a turkey sat there browning lightly. Pa Evans was starting to look old to her and that scared her. She knew that he was old but he had always been a fit old, but things were starting to take their toll on him and he tried easier these days.

Picking up a cup she poured herself some tea and helped herself to her Pa's toast. He shot her a look as if he was mad as she settled herself on the chair next to him. She didn't need to ask where the rest of the house was because she knew.

"Your dad still sleeping?"

It was said lightly but she knew Pa was worried. Her father was worse than he had been in a long time. There was a feeling of it wasn't long now before it would be over. She felt certain that this was their last Christmas as a family and that upset her.

"Yeah. He's catching up on what he missed last night."

She had heard her father in the bathroom well into the night. He was finding it difficult to keep anything down. He needed to be in hospice or a hospital but refused. He wanted to be at home, and he wanted to be with his family this Christmas. Lily found it strange referring to Pa's house as home but that's what it had become.

"What about that Dursley lad?"

Vernon Dursley, Petunia's husband. Lily thought he was an obnoxious man who was below her sister. Yet she could tell that her sister was in love and you couldn't help who you fell in love with. Lily just wished that Vernon wasn't spending Christmas with them. She looked at her Pa with a strange look.

"He's in the shower. I want to know how we're expected to sleep with him in the house?"

Pa laughed gruffly.

"His snoring would wake the dead."

"His snoring would wake a mountain troll!"

Her Pa laughed not entirely getting the joke. Mountain trolls were some of the worse creatures to wake and she was sure Vernon Dursley could do it. She bit into her toast and looked at the clock.

"Nine thirty and Petunia hasn't opened any gifts. She must be ill!"

"Now Lily."

"Well she's usually up at six on Christmas Day!"

Lily was startled as a knock resounded through the house. She looked at her Pa. Everyone who was expected was already at the house. Who could that be? She stood to answer it when she heard someone running downstairs and a yell from Petunia that she'd get it. They heard the door open and then the shocking sound of her sister's voice.

"What are you freaks doing here?"

Pa Evans raised a brow at the term but Lily wanted to groan. Petunia reserved the word freak for her. That meant that whoever was at the door was for her. It was bound to be one of her friends. But who would be coming round? Maybe it was James with a gift. He had hinted the other night that he wanted to see her on Christmas Day.

"Nice to see you too Petunia. Is Lily in?"

That wasn't James. That was Amanda. There was something about her tone though. She was tired. Lily could tell even from here. But why would Amanda be here? Then a thought struck. Something bad had happened. Lily rose to go into the hall when she heard her father.

"Petunia let them in."

"But dad – Hey!"

Petunia's voice rose and Lily could see why. Somebody had pushed her out of the way and was running towards her. James was almost like a blur but she recognised him. Strangely he was only in a pair of tracksuit bottoms. She wondered about that and felt sure that her father or Pa would make a comment about a half naked boy in the kitchen but she didn't have time to consider what as his arms wrapped around her. His grip was tight and his head went straight to her shoulder. Something felt wrong.

"James –"

"I had to check. Frank said … but I couldn't … what if … thank Merlin!"

He wasn't making sense. She couldn't say anything as his lips brushed against hers in a gentle quick kiss. Then his cheek was against hers as he pulled her closer to him. She was positive that he wasn't going to let go of her anytime soon.

Something in the door caught her eyes. Amanda was stood there. Like James she was half dressed in boxers and a vest. Her face was set in a hard manner that Lily had seen too many times in the last few years. Something had happened. That's why James was clinging to her. But she couldn't ask what because Vernon and Petunia were pushing Amanda aside and her father was taking a seat. The silence was broken by Vernon Dursley of all people.

"Petunia who are these people?"

"A pair of freaks that shouldn't be welcomed here."

"That's enough Tuney."

Her father was sounding tired but there was a determined sound to his voice. Petunia looked as though she was about to ignore him but she reframed from saying anything else. It was Amanda who spoke next. Her eyes were on Lily's and she knew it was just for her she was speaking.

"We're very sorry to intrude uninvited on Christmas. But he wouldn't stay put. Not until he made sure you weren't dead."

"Why would she be dead?"

The four others spoke as one. It sounded such a strange mixture of voices. Lily understood that someone was dead though. She looked around and spotted the chair. It was too far for her to walk too. There was only one thing to do. The chair moved across the room and stopped next to her. She positioned James into it and stood facing him. Her Pa was looking around amazed.

"How'd that chair move?"

Lily didn't respond. She could see Petunia saying something to Vernon but her eyes were now locked on the other girl in the room.

"Who?"

Amanda looked at the floor a moment before answering.

"Jacqueline."

Lily gasped as her hands went to James. She held him tightly as she looked down at him. The tears were already in her eyes. Not another death! Lily felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up. Amanda was there with a bottle of firewhisky.

"Rosmerta gave it to us. Figure he may need a glass now."

Glasses appeared from thin air around them and Lily placed them on the table.

"How'd she do that?"

Petunia spoke with hatred in her voice to answer Pa's question.

"Remember I told you Lily was a witch and you said I was being silly. Doesn't look so silly now does it? She goes to this freak school where she's taught how to do magic with other freaks like those two."

"Enough Tuney."

"Maybe I'm the only one who can see what a freak she really is."

"I wasn't such a freak when you wrote to Dumbledore asking him to let you go to Hogwarts was I?"

Petunia opened her mouth and closed it. She looked outraged as she stared at them for a moment. Then she was on her feet storming out of the room. Lily watched as Vernon looked at the three of them before following behind his wife. Lily lowered her eyes to James then. She didn't care.

"I'm sorry this isn't how your Christmas was supposed to be."

She gently traced her finger across his face. There was a slight amount of stubble that was unusual for him. Her voice was gentle as she spoke.

"Nobodies Christmas was supposed to be like this."

Their eyes were locked and she could see all the pain locked behind them. She had never seen him look so vulnerable. It frightened her to the core that he could get shaken this badly. She had always thought of James as a strong person, even through the tragedies he had been strong. This must have been really bad.

"Here take this."

Amanda's voice was powerful and clear. Lily realised that she had yet to hear any emotion in her tone. She sounded tired but she was sure and confident. It was clear that Amanda was in charge and James took the glass without second thought. He downed the drink and it was topped up instantly.

Lily took the glass that was offered to her and held it as Amanda moved around the kitchen. Her Pa took the drink silently as did her father. They were both watching the girl as she picked up one herself. She raised it to her lips and sipped at it. Lily didn't touch hers as she looked at her friend.

"What happened?"

Amanda turned and met her eyes. There was a flash of something behind them but then it was hidden. The bottle she had been holding was passed to James. Lily was horrified to find that he had finished his second glass and was starting his third.

"It was just after midnight. I had said I was tired and Jacqueline decided that we should all go up to bed. I was in the room with Alice talking about …"

Her voice faded and she took a large gulp of her drink before continuing.

"There was a scream. It was …"

Again Amanda stopped and finished her glass. Using her wand for the first time in the house she moved the bottle from James hands and it poured herself another glass. Her eyes at all times were now on the floor. It was as if she were trying to hide the emotions. Lily understood Amanda well enough to know now that she was trying to be strong. She needed to be in control of this situation.

"We all ran onto the landing. Jacqueline was in single hand combat with one of the Death Eaters on the stairs. She had still been downstairs. Then there were five others firing at us. Sirius said something but I crawled away. I went to my room and James' and got our brooms."

Her eyes came up at this bit and there was a twinkle in them.

"James and I are good enough to out manoeuvre anything on a broom. I thought that we would be able to attract their attentions and aim. Then when they were trying to get us Sirius and Alice could take them out. It was working too."

Lily waited. She noticed how James and Amanda both took swigs from their glasses. James' eyes were starting to brim over with tears again and as Amanda spoke there was a quiver to her voice.

"Jacqueline was hit. She just went down and James dived at the Death Eater. He got knocked from his broom and was sprawled out over her. I didn't have time to do anything sensible. I knew what the bastard was going to do. It's what I would do in his place. His wand was high and he was going to kill James. So I sent a numbing spell. I missed but it did brush his shoulder and his wand dropped a bit. So I jumped from my broom and grabbed his leg. And then I got us out of there…"

Her voice faded and Lily knew that she wouldn't say anything else. Her left hand came to her face and Lily watched as the girl pinched the bridge of her nose. This was new.

"I don't understand any of this."

Lily looked at Pa Evans and shook her head slightly. He had never been told about her life in the wizarding world. He assumed she went to a private boarding school in Scotland. He assumed that she had won a scholarship there and that was why Petunia had never gone. But it seemed that it was time for the truth.

"Pa I'm a witch."

He shot her a look and she held her wand up high.

"I go to a school that teaches young witches and wizards how to control their powers and how to use them in a sensible manner. There are loads of us there."

"And these two are friends of yours."

"Yes. This is James and Amanda. They are both in the same year and the same house as me."

"I'll explain it to you later dad. Amanda this attack it's that Voldiemurt guy that's done it?"

Lily could sense the way both Amanda and James tightened at this. But the girl did answer.

"Not personally no. He sent his followers. But he is behind this attack."

"Why did he attack Jacqueline?"

"Why does he attack anyone Mr. Evans?"

Amanda spoke softly and Lily knew that it was to comfort James. Lily was trying to get her father's attention. These questions could wait for later as well. It was clear that James was really hurt. But if her father understood her look her grandfather didn't. He asked the question that sent James into spasm.

"Who was this woman?"

Lily was quick to answer this.

"James' mother."

Silence engulfed them all. It was a few minutes before Amanda broke the silence.

"Lily are you okay to keep an eye on James for a while."

"I'm not a baby."

"That's good it means Lily won't have to worry about dirty nappies then."

It was the usual joking that went on between the pair but it didn't sound right. James' eyes had left Lily and were on Amanda.

"Where are you going?"

"I need to see Remus and Pete. The Prophet and WWN will be all over this story soon. I'd rather they hear from one of us."

"Then you'll come back."

"I'm going to Frank's then."

"Why?"

"I need to see Sirius and Alice."

"Then you'll come back."

She nodded gently.

"Yes then I'll come back here and take you back to Hogwarts."

"I don't want –"

"You have no choice in the matter James. Dumbledore ordered us up to the school and we've already snuck out. Plus I promised Branwen that we'll be back there tonight."

"But –"

"No arguments James."

The two shared a look. Then Amanda was across the room and wrapped in his arms. It was strange watching her boyfriend and his ex in a tight embrace. Any other girl would be jealous but not Lily. She had nothing to worry about from Amanda. The pair had experienced something during the night that she wasn't part of. She understood that something was making James worry.

"I'll see you in a couple of hours okay."

She kissed the top of his head and turned. She hadn't left the kitchen when Lily spoke up.

"You can't go like that."

She turned.

"What?"

"You look like hell."

"Lily –"

"Come on I've got some clothes you can borrow. It won't be the first time."

Lily squeezed James' hand as she left with Amanda. As they walked up the stairs Lily knew that this wasn't going to be the Christmas that she had wanted. But she was just thankful for the fact that things hadn't turned out worse. She would stay with James all day; she loved him enough for that.


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

A knock broke up the laughter in the kitchen. Remus placed his new jumper down and made to stand up.

"No don't get up son I'll get it."

Remus wasn't going to argue as he picked up another mince pie. His mother turned from the stove with a smile on her face.

"I wonder who would be calling us at this time?"

"Maybe its dad's girlfriend."

The pair laughed as his mother took a sip of juice. They had been winding his father up something rotten over the last week. It seemed that a young witch within the ministry was quite taken with him. His father turned a startling shade of red every time it was mentioned, so of course they were having tones of fun.

The kitchen door opened and Remus looked up to see a strange glance on his fathers face. Before he could ask though he noticed the small girl stood beside him. Remus looked her up and down and felt the colour on his face drain. The mince pie he had been holding just fell onto the table as she took a step into the kitchen.

"I'm very sorry to intrude on Christmas morning like this."

Remus didn't move as he looked at his friend. She looked a state and that was the best he could describe her. She was dressed simply in muggle trousers and a jumper with boots but she looked too pale for normal. Under her eyes he noticed dark circles which were more likely to be seen under his own than hers. He knew something must have happened.

"Mand –"

"You haven't had the radio on yet this morning have you?"

"No. Why?"

She simply nodded as she looked around the kitchen. There was something almost wishful in the way she took in the detail. Remus realised that she had never visited his home before. She smiled shyly as his mother caught her eye.

"You have a very lovely home Mrs Lupin."

"Thank you."

It all sounded very formal to him. Again Remus wondered if Amanda had ever met his mother. She had seen his father only a few days ago at the station but his mother had been absent. His father though was now shooting looks at Remus. He quickly cleared his throat.

"Mand don't take this the wrong way but what are you doing here?"

She yawned as a response quickly covering her mouth with a hand. Blinking a few times she seemed to gain control of herself.

"Sorry it's been a long night."

"You look like you haven't slept."

"I haven't. Remus I know it's Christmas and it's a time to celebrate and be happy but I have some news that can't wait…"

Her eyes went to the floor a second before her left hand covered them. She spoke the next sentence with her eyes hidden from his view.

"A group of Death Eaters attacked the Potter house last night. Jacqueline is dead."

The startled yelp from his mother drew his attention but his eyes remained on the girl. He stood up on legs that felt like they might give way and covered the space between them. His arms wrapped around her but she made no move.

"Was anyone else hurt?"

He felt her shake her head.

"James is in pieces I've had to take him to Lily's because he started to freak out over whether she had been attacked. Umm Alice and Sirius went straight to Franks place. I haven't seen them since it happened so I don't know what state they're in."

"Sirius didn't go with James? That's odd."

She pulled away and looked a little up at Remus.

"I grabbed hold of James during the attack and took him to Hogsmeade. I didn't think about Sirius or Alice I just had to get James out of there. Apparently Alice grabbed hold of Sirius and thought of Frank and took him there."

"Do you need me to go see James or anything because I want to help?"

She gave him a small smile and he could see the exhaustion that lingered on her features. She looked ready to drop to the floor and sleep.

"Thank you but I promised James I would go back later and take him back up to Hogwarts. We've kind of snuck out without Dumbledore's permission this morning."

"Okay I'll come back with you."

This time the smile was sad as she shook her head.

"Remus its Christmas."

"But Jacqueline –"

"Remus please. Listen you actually have a family. You're one of the lucky ones. Please stay here and have Christmas together. I know Jacqueline would want it that way."

Remus shook his head looking over at his parents. He couldn't imagine what was going through James' head at the moment. The thought of being attacked and watching his mother die sent shivers through his body. He held onto Amanda's hand tightly.

"What's going to happen now then?"

The girl shook her head slowly.

"I've no idea. I'm going to Peter's next to tell him and then I'm heading over to Frank's to see Sirius and Alice. After that I'm going back to Lily's to get James and then we're heading back to Hogwarts. After that well I just don't know."

"It's going to fall to James to arrange the funeral. He's the only surviving family member."

Remus looked up at his father at this. All he could do was shake his head in response. His mother it seemed finally found her voice.

"The poor boy. He shouldn't have to deal with that. Surely there's someone else."

"There is."

Remus turned his eyes back to his friend. He knew what was going through her mind with one swift glance. He just shook his head towards her trying to find the right words.

"Mand maybe James should be the one to arrange it. I know you want to help but –"

"Re please you didn't see him. I've got bruises up my arms from where he was clinging to me and the way he asked if I was going back to Lily's. I know this will sound strange because he's just my friend but I feel as if he needs me for this."

"Mand he has Lily."

"I know that. But I also know that I was the one with him last night. I know that I was the one holding him when the people in Hogsmeade came out. I was the one who shielded him from them and held him tight while they moved his mother out of the snow. I was the one that took him to Lily and I'm the one that he wants to go back to him. Not Sirius, not Alice and they were there. I feel like I have to do this."

"But not on your own Mand."

She lifted her eyes and looked Remus straight in the eyes.

"Of course not. But I think the less James has to do the better. He's still in denial over this."

Remus could understand that. Losing someone you love takes time to get over. It takes even longer to process and he could only imagine what James was thinking right now. He was probably reliving the attack and trying to come up with ways in which he could have saved his mother. Maybe he really did need all the help he could get.

Peter stared into space as the turkey cooked in the oven. Christmas had never been that exciting a time for him. And this year wasn't turning out to be any different. It was barely ten thirty and his mother was already drunk on cooking whisky.

He was beginning to think that maybe it had been a mistake to come home for the holiday. His mother had been so drunk over the last week that he was sure she was unaware that he was even home. He would have been better off staying at Hogwarts with Branwen. He could have spent Christmas with her and Ddraig. Neither one would have minded.

And the food. Oh it would be mouth watering. Hogwarts feasts were always fantastic and he could still remember that one Christmas he had remained behind with everyone else and wow the food still came to him in dreams sometimes.

But he knew his home Christmas dinner wasn't going to be up to much. He had a turkey crown in the oven that he had bought three days earlier. He had peeled the potatoes and got the vegetables ready. Basically he was the cook for this meal. He didn't mind cooking it was something he had discovered he had a talent for. But he wished that his mother was sober enough to enjoy it.

As for Christmas itself well it was turning out to be a bad one. He had bought his mother a pretty broach in the shape of a raven. And she had given him a bottle of fire whisky which in the space of two hours she had already drunk. It was turning out to be another one of the Pettigrew traditional Christmases even with his father's absence.

The song on the radio came to an end and a breaking news story came over.

_A Death Eater attack has ended with the death of one of societies golden witches. It seems that in the early hours of this morning the home of Jacqueline Potter was targeted and the witch was killed while fighting off her attackers –_

Peter heard the glass he had been holding smash against the floor. His mother's head, which had been dropped on the table, snapped up as she looked at him.

"Peter-"

"Shh."

Using his wand he increased the volume as the story continued.

"_James Potter, her only son, turned up in Hogsmeade village before one o'clock this morning with a young witch locals identified to be Amanda Dixon. Most shocking is the news that they had the witches' body with them. A source who wishes to remain anonymous had this to say."_

"_The two youngsters were in a terrible state it was clear that they had been through something traumatic. Albus Dumbledore was quick to appear on the scene and once he arrived we heard a rumour that another two youngsters had been at the house with them. But we don't know what has happened to them."_

"_We spoke to Alastor Moody earlier head of the Auror department who confirmed that Jacqueline Potter had been killed. When we asked him about the youngsters he confirmed that there were four Hogwarts students at the house. He went on to tell us that all four are safe and without injury."_

Peter's stomach was knotted and he felt sick. His mind was trying to turn this information over but he wasn't having a very successful job with it. He felt that he needed to go somewhere, to do something but what? Where would his friends be? Hogwarts was the only answer he could think of. He'd go there and see them. He'd do whatever he could do to help.

As he stood up a knock sounded on the door. His head snapped in that direction. Would the Death Eaters attack him? Then a forced laugh left his mouth. Death Eaters wouldn't knock. He made his way to the door with his wand in his hand just in case. Maybe it would be a reporter. They'd probably discovered who had been in the house and were now trying to get information from their friends. It was a pity that he knew nothing. Obviously his friends had over looked him.

As he opened the door he felt his mouth drop a little. He threw the door wider as he grabbed the girl stood on the front step into arms. From somewhere around his shoulder area he heard a voice.

"You've had the radio on."

He pulled back and looked at his friend.

"They just did a news piece with a breaking story. What happened?"

"Can I come in first?"

Peter stepped aside and let Amanda enter the hall. He closed the door and looked at her. He could see that the attack had been bad from the look of her. She spoke softly.

"Six Death Eaters attacked. They killed Jacqueline and James grabbed her body. I got hold him and took us to Hogsmeade village. I just wanted to get us to the school. Alice managed to grab Sirius and took him to Frank's. They're still there. But James is in Lily's he got scared that they might have attacked her."

Peter closed his eyes and shook his head lightly.

"I wish I had known sooner."

"I'm so sorry Pete I didn't mean for you to find out this way. I've left James at Lily's while I went to Remus' to tell him and then I came straight over here. You two were the only ones that didn't know. Joe is at Frank's so Frank is sure Alice will have told him already and we were in Hogwarts this morning and so we told Branwen. I am really sorry Pete."

"How's James?"

"He's bad. Can I tell you something?"

"Sure."

"I keep thinking about when his dad died."

Peter pulled a face and Amanda gave a soft sigh.

"Henry died while James and I were dating. I remember having this awful feeling that I needed to do something to help him and I've got that feeling again. And its almost like history is repeating itself."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Henry's funeral Dumbledore said that we couldn't all go remember."

"Yeah we had a long discussion about who should be the ones to go. Alice went because she'd known him since she had been tiny because her dad had been friends with him. Then Sirius went because he kept arguing that Henry was his dad too and you went because you were James' girlfriend."

Amanda nodded at him.

"Yeah and we were in the Potter house then the four of us. And it hit me last night. The four of us had been there for Henry's funeral and the four of us were the ones to witness Jacqueline's death. It's the strangest feeling in the world. And I feel as if I took Lily's place last night, but now I can't give it back to her."

"I don't see why not."

"Pete that day in the funeral James broke down. I remember that we were in the middle of the living area and everybody started staring at him. It was the first time I ever saw him cry in public. I wrapped my arms around him and told him that it was going to be okay. I tried to shield him from the eyes."

"Last night he was clinging to Jacqueline's body in the snow and all these people came out of their homes in Hogsmeade and all I could do was wrap my arms around him and try to shield him. Then we were in the pub and he was on the floor sobbing and I just held him and I told him that everything would be fine and that I wouldn't let anything happen. It felt the same as back then. And I keep thinking that its wrong Lily should be the one to comfort him yet I'm itching to get back to him to make sure he's alright."

Peter crossed his arms and thought about it.

"I think we've all been through so much together that it's a natural reaction. When Alice's parents were killed I remember sitting on the sofa with her and thinking that I wished that I could make it all better. And I held her hand and just sat with her. And when Tad died I spent five hours with Branwen that first night in the common room. Everything was all messed up and nobody knew who had died and you were worrying about Sirius and James so Remus was trying to calm you down. Frank and Joe were trying to keep Alice and Lily calm and I just sat with Branwen. And I know that I just wanted to take away her pain. It didn't matter that she wasn't my girlfriend she's my friend. And I'd want to do the same for any of them. Hell I was just planning on heading up to Hogwarts to try and help James."

Amanda bit her lower lip and then slowly nodded.

"I guess it comes down to the fact that we're a family doesn't it."

Peter smiled softly.

"None of us were born into the same family but somehow fate has bound us together. When one of us hurts we all do. I think we've learnt that haven't we."

"Yeah."

There was a silence for a moment and then Peter looked over his shoulder. He could see his mother bent over the table sleeping again. He shook his head slowly.

"You look dead on your feet Mand. Do you want me to take you back to Hogwarts?"

She gave a soft little smile.

"Thanks but I'm heading over to Frank's. I haven't seen Sirius since the attack and it's made me realise something. I really need to see him."

Peter looked at the girl before drawing her into a hug.

"Tell James if he needs anything to contact me."

Okay so this chapter hasn't worked out quite the way I wanted it to but I got the main points in. And I know the attack seems to be repeated and it's all Amanda but there's a reason why she's the one going around. James isn't physically in a state where he is capable of it and Alice and Sirius are not allowed to leave the house until they've eaten and slept. I think the next chapter might be interesting to see how they are coping with being under 'house arrest' by Frank's mother.

Kris xx


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

The grandfather clock struck twelve and chimes echoed through the house. A shiver ran through Sirius' body as the final one signalled. Twelve hours ago they had been sat around a cosy fire laughing and telling jokes. It was only twelve hours ago that Jacqueline had been alive.

Yet now things were so different. He wasn't sat in that living room trying to convince James to try his motorbike as he had intended. He wasn't pulling Amanda's hand to drag her under the mistletoe that Jacqueline had put up in the hallway. Hell he hadn't even opened a single present.

No instead he was sat on the sofa in Frank's house trying to keep his eyes open. It wasn't as hard as he thought it would be. The truth was he didn't want to sleep. He was shattered yes but his mind refused to shut down. He was still too on edge to sleep.

Frank had returned with Moody and it was only forty minutes ago that the Auror took his leave. They had spent hours going over every little detail that Sirius and Alice could remember. He couldn't help but replay certain things and wonder if maybe he had acted in another way if the outcome would have been different.

It was only after the Auror left that Frank felt able to answer their questions. He told them about going to the house and what he had seen. There was nothing really interesting to Sirius about that. It was his description of Hogsmeade that got his attention.

Frank had spoken about entering the Three Broomsticks and finding a group of locals at a table. But it was the look on his face as he said he spotted Amanda and James clinging to each other on the floor that had hit Sirius. Amanda had been holding James in a protective manner rocking him gently as she stroked his head. It was an image of comfort.

Maybe it should have eased some of the pressure that Sirius was feeling but it hadn't. He didn't take it to mean that his girlfriend was alright. It told him she was putting on a front. She was trying to be strong and brave to keep James safe. It made him want to run out of the house so he could wrap his arms around her and make her feel safe. He wanted her to be able to break down the way that he already had.

When Frank had described the flat monotone that James had used when he had asked the question his heart sunk with pain and sorrow for his friend. But when he had said that Amanda's had been low but strong Sirius knew that she was trying to be strong enough for James. Once more he had wanted to find her.

But then he had heard about James wanting to go to Lily and how Amanda had taken him and a frenzy that had been absent since Frank's return came back. Sirius suddenly realised that once again he had no idea where Amanda was. He had assumed she had remained in Hogwarts and he was feeling relieved that she was safe. Now she was out there somewhere. Maybe she was still in Pete's or in Remus'. She could have returned to Lily's or Hogwarts. He just didn't know and he didn't like that feeling.

If the insane worry for Amanda wasn't enough for him Augusta's attempts to get him to sleep were rattling him. He was almost ready to say something hurtful. But he was holding back. He could see in her eyes that she was trying to do what was best. She was worried. And he noted that he did need sleep. They all did. But she didn't seem to understand that he couldn't rest until he had seen Amanda.

Frank's family were all starting to drive him a little crazy. And he knew they didn't mean it. Augusta and Enid were shooting looks his and Alice's way every time they re-entered the room after checking on the food. Algie was smoking a pipe and talking to Victor and Kyle. It was clear what the topic was. As for Anton and Joe they were on the floor with a pack of cards trying to pretend that things were normal. Sirius was finding that attitude difficult to deal with.

But maybe the hardest part of it all was the fact that Alice was cuddled up in Frank's arms. The boy was talking quietly to her comforting her. It made Sirius feel even worse wondering where Amanda was.

At twelve thirty Augusta finally called them all to the table. Sirius wasn't exactly hungry but he stood up and made his way to the table. Frank had loaned him a pair of trousers and he had re-buttoned his shirt. He felt a little more respectable as he took a seat next to Anton.

They all sat at the table and Sirius looked at the plate. The delicious smells of the roast turkey drifted through the house. He imagined sitting at another table with fewer people. That feast would never now take place. He was dragged from his thoughts by Algie.

"What's with the spare place Augusta?"

Sirius looked around the table and sure enough there was a spare seat between Enid and Anton. It felt symbolic to him. There was someone who would never sit at a table like this again.

"Frank told me to lay another place."

All eyes went to the young man but he looked at his watch.

"She's a bit late. I'm sure she won't mind us starting without her. So what have we got for starters this year mum?"

Augusta looked a little flustered but quickly regained control. She gave a little smile to those around the table as the first course was served.

"We have smoked salmon paté with melba toast."

Sirius looked at Anton with a quizzical look. Smoked salmon? Melba toast? What was wrong with some soup? It sounded a bit over the top. But then this was a Christmas dinner with a family he'd never really met before. Maybe this was the sort of thing they always had.

He ate the starter silently as conversation buzzed around him. It was probably more subdued than normal but it was starting to feel like Christmas. Only it felt like he was intruding on somebody else's celebrations.

Before they had finished the course a knock sounded. Frank jumped from his seat excusing himself. The buzz got louder as he left.

"I wonder who he's invited to join us. I would have guessed his girlfriend but since she's already here…"

Algie picked up a large glass with brandy in and took a sip. Sirius wasn't really bothered. He hoped that once he had eaten Augusta would agree to let him go to Hogwarts even if he hadn't slept. He wanted to be in his own bed, he wanted to see James and Amanda. He needed to see Amanda.

He heard a gasp from his left and looked to see Alice jump out of her chair. She ran to the door and threw herself at someone. Sirius turned to look to try and see who Alice was hugging so tightly. Maybe it was another relative of Frank's come to lunch.

As she pulled back though Sirius took in the new arrival. His legs moved so he stood and it was almost like somebody else was controlling him as he walked towards her. He could hear the conversation between the two girls.

"I was so worried. I never thought to go to Hogsmeade."

"You were worried. I thought I'd left you back at the house and then I started to panic that you were dead."

"Have you slept, had anything to eat?"

"No I haven't had a chance to sleep. I've been everywhere this morning. Everyone is worried about James and want to help. As for food. Well Rosmerta gave me a bottle of fire whisky. I had three glasses and I think James has drunk more or less the rest of the bottle. Remus' mum made me have a mince pie and his dad gave me some sherry and Pete forced me to eat a few of these Christmas cookies he made. Do you know he can cook?"

"Wait so you haven't slept, haven't eaten but you've been drinking. Amanda Dixon are you drunk?"

"Of course not. The alcohol has been controlling the shock and –"

She didn't get to finish the sentence. Sirius had reached them. Taking her hand he pulled her straight to him. His lips went to hers for a moment in a fierce kiss before he pulled her to his chest and held her tight. He didn't care if anybody else in the room was watching. He nuzzled his face into her hair and let the tears that had been sat in them fall.

"Sirius."

He heard the tears in her voice. Taking a small step back he allowed her to raise her face to look at him. Tears were falling from her eyes and running down her cheeks. He could feel wet patches on his own face and knew that his own tears hadn't stopped.

"Mandy –"

"Si I'm so sorry."

"What? Mandy you have nothing to be sorry about."

"I left you there. I went and I didn't even think to try and get you out."

She sounded so hurt and emotional. He reached gently and cupped her face in his hands.

"Amanda listen to me I'm a big boy I'm capable of getting myself out of there."

"I know but I should have taken you with me."

"No. You did what you had to do."

He leaned down and kissed her lips tenderly. When he pulled back she was looking at him closely.

"Si you're crying."

"I was worried. I'm so relieved that you're here."

She wrapped her arms around him tightly and he heard a smoothness to her voice as she spoke.

"Why would you be worried?"

"I was worried because I was scared."

"But why?"

"I thought the Death Eaters had gotten you."

He felt her tighten her grip on him at that. But her voice was still steady.

"But you saw me leave the house."

"That didn't matter. I knew that you had left the house but I had no idea where you were. The Death Eaters might have found you and I thought you were dead. And it didn't matter when Frank came back because you left again and you were back out there. The Death Eaters could still have found you. I just … I was so scared."

She loosened her grip and he let her pull away. But she didn't break contact as she reached up and took his face between her hands. She looked him in the eyes carefully as she spoke.

"I'm not dead Sirius. And I promise you that I have no intention of ever leaving you. I love you and I can't believe that I've been too afraid to tell you that before. I'm in love with you Sirius Black and I promise that you don't have to worry anymore."

She had barely finished the words when Sirius forced his mouth to hers. He pulled her body back against his as he quickly deepened the kiss. He could feel her hands pulling at his hair as she kissed him back. He wrapped his around her waist wanting, no needing to be close to her. Finally she pulled back and he allowed her only because he was breathless himself.

He noticed the way that she looked at his chest instead of his face. He knew her so well that he knew she was panicking over her revelation. Tilting her chin gently so that she was forced to meet his eyes he spoke softly.

"Last night before the attack James asked if I was planning on proposing to you and I shocked him by revealing that I hadn't managed to tell you that I love you. And I do. I've loved you for so long and I've wanted to tell you. I just never could get the words out. And then sitting here this morning I kept wondering if maybe I had lost you and that if you were dead you would never have known that I love you. And it's stupid that I haven't been able to tell you because it's you and me and… we belong together Mandy we always have. And I love you. I love you more than anything in this world and –"

Her lips pushed against his as she threw her arms around his neck. He felt his heart quicken as he realised that he had finally done it. He had told her the truth. As he wrapped his arms around her again he heard a strange clinking noise. Both he and Amanda pulled a little back and turned to see what it was.

At the dinner table almost all eyes were turned to them. He heard her gasp as she disentangled herself from him. But he refused to let go of her hand. Alice had moved back to the table and was the only one who had managed not to stare. Algie once more was the one to speak up.

"Well how about that for entertainment then. A young girl appears and then kisses the boy so much he starts crying. I say is there any chance that you'll be moving on to give the rest of us any kisses?"

"Algie leave the girl alone! Amanda you must be starving. Come on sit down. You're just in time for the main course."

Augusta gave them both a warm smile as she indicated the food on the table. They moved towards it and Sirius noticed Anton had switched seats with him. He lowered himself into the seat next to his girlfriend and was very reluctant to release her hand so that they could eat.

* * *

Okay so basically I wanted Sirius and Amanda to realise that they love each other and to be able to say it. But neither of them could find the courage to say the words. So it took until they both thought the other was dead to do it. And that is basically what this chapter is about.

Kris xx


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Boxing Day had a strange sort of feel to it this year. This was not how the holiday was suppose to be. No presents had been opened and the home in which he was meant to spend the festive season lay empty.

Sirius sat on the sofa in the Gryffindor common room surrounded by the silence that was only possible when the greater population of the school was absent. He knew that the peace would be relaxing most of the time but for him it left him alone with his thoughts.

His dreams the night before had been riddled with nightmares. He had watched repeatedly as people he loved where killed in front of him and he had been unable to do anything. He had awoken a number of times and only steadied himself because of the girl that was next to him. Amanda had seemed to have had as little rest as he had. It made him wish that he had thought to ask for a sleeping potion for her.

Across the room James had been still and silent. His dreams were peaceful thanks to the potion that Sirius had forcefully forced down his throat upon his arrival. He had left Franks home at the same time as Amanda but while she had gone to get James he had come straight to the school. Then he had found Madam Pomfrey and together they had pounced on the boy on his arrival back.

James had still to wake up from the sleep. Sirius felt this was probably for the best considering. The only other occupant of the boys' dorm that night had been Branwen. Curled up in the bed that usually belonged to Peter she seemed comfortable. It must have been the fact that she alone had not witnessed the awful events.

Sirius stretched as he waited for someone to come back. Branwen had gone down to London on a scheduled visit to Lily's to spend the day together. Apparently Alice and Amanda were originally suppose to go as well. But Amanda hadn't left the building. She had headed to the girls bathroom to take a bubble bath.

Sirius was worried for his girlfriend she looked exhausted today. She really wasn't herself. When the mail had arrived at breakfast and another owl from her grandmother had arrived she didn't even blink. Sirius knew that she had been getting them every morning since the 20th. Her grandmother had arranged a dress fitting for her on that date and of course she had missed it.

Bored he picked up a magazine that was on the floor. It turned out not to be a magazine but a catalogue. He turned the pages looking at the dress robes wondering who had been looking through it. He heard the portrait open and without looking up spoke to Amanda.

"Is this yours? You planning on buying new dress robes?"

There was no reply. He looked up and almost fell off the couch he was sprawled along.

"Where is she?"

The old woman looked menacing as she lingered in the doorway to the house. She seemed angrier than Sirius had ever seen her and he thought that almost impossible after the time he poisoned her house elf. He had never seen a woman scream the way she had then.

"I don't know."

"That's a lie."

Sirius sat up straight and shrugged.

"She went off with Branwen somewhere. I've got no idea where. I thought you were her coming back."

"I demand to know what is happening boy."

If her tone of voice hadn't been bad enough the fact she had referred to him as boy really did something. It took everything in him to remember his friend was asleep upstairs. Making sure to keep direct eye-contact to the old bag he replied simply.

"A woman died yesterday and we witnessed it. That's what is happening."

"A woman is dead. Do I look like I care about that? People die everyday boy. I want to know what is happening with your wedding."

"There is no wedding."

"THERE WILL BE A WEDDING BOY EVEN IF I HAVE TO HEX THE PAIR OF YOU DOWN THE AISLE."

"No there won't."

"Don't play games with me Sirius Black. I am older and more powerful than you. I will be down in the main hall and I suggest you find my granddaughter and get her down there within ten minutes otherwise there will be more than one dead woman for you to deal with."

The catalogue in Sirius hand was in a tight ball by the time the woman left the room. Sirius was ready to scream as he stood up and headed up to his dorm room.

In all the years that the boys had been using the Marauders Map there had been one rule. They were never to use it to access the girls' bathrooms. It was something that Remus had set forth early on and none of them thought it appropriate to break it. So as Sirius stood outside the room this time he felt his stomach turn. He was about to break one of the most important Marauder rules.

Lobalugs appeared in a bubble above the door on the map. Sirius looked at it again. The only person shown on the other side of the door was a dot with the name 'Amanda Dixon'. Something was telling him to knock the door but she was likely so out of it that she wouldn't hear. He could just turn around and walk away. But then that woman would come back. With a sign he did what he thought was right.

"Lobalugs."

The door clicked open and he stepped inside. On first glance it was set up like the boys bathroom. There were five tubs with curtains around them. Then there were cubicles with showers off to one side all of which he could clearly see due to the fact none of the curtains were closed.

He turned his attention back to the baths expecting to find that one of them was curtained off but they were all open. A mop of dark hair could be seen over the rim of one of them. Something stirred inside him as he watched the hair raise higher and a pair of eyes turn to look at him.

The scream that escaped her mouth startled him. Quickly he spun on his heel so that he was facing the closed the door. His cheeks felt heated as he was sure they were changing to a red colour. The sound of water moving made him squirm a little and then she spoke.

"What are you doing in here? Are you trying to get us both in trouble?"

Very slowly he turned and looked at her. She had wrapped a towel securely around herself. He looked her up and down for a moment than closed his eyes tightly. That was all he needed to be thinking now!

"Sirius?"

"Your grandmother has turned up. She's demanding to see you too."

"Shit."

"That's what I thought."

"Keep your eyes closed okay."

Sirius did as he was ordered. He could hear the rustle of clothes and his imagination went into overload. He tried to stop himself but he couldn't. It took all his strength to keep his eyes closed until she told him otherwise.

When he finally did he saw how pale she looked. Her body seemed to be shaking and within two steps he had her his arms.

"Everything will be fine I promise."

"I was just thinking how I don't need this on top of everything else."

"You're telling me."

He gave a light chuckle as he led out of the bathroom.

The Great Hall was empty except for the lone woman stood to one side. Sirius squeezed Amanda's hand gently as they stepped inside the room. The woman turned and studied them as they marched side by side over to her.

"You missed your fitting Amanda. I trust you have a good explanation."

"Sure I don't need a dress."

"Don't be flippant with me girl. You are getting married and you will be wearing a traditional wedding dress."

"Only Grandmother I'm not getting married. I've been released from it by mother."

"You're mother is in no sound mind to make such decisions. I tell you that you are getting married."

"No I'm not."

"I will not have you disrespect the family any more than you already have. You will do this."

"Grandmother I have no idea where you've been. We don't have a family anymore. Mother is somewhere in Europe, father is locked away forever, Ana is a Parkinson so her loyalties now lie with them and Ad well give him a few more years and he'll be with father. I was disowned by them years ago anyway. So how can I disrespect a bunch of people I don't belong to? Oh unless you're afraid for my friends but if that's the case you don't have to worry. Because they aren't actually pushing us to get married. They're fine with the idea of us just living together."

Sirius remained silent at Amanda's side as the old woman looked ready to burst.

"You may have been disowned by your fathers family girl but we still saw you as one of us. And I am ordering you to marry this boy as and when you are told. Otherwise I promise that I will ensure that you are both disowned for good and that not even your great grandchildren will be welcomed but a member of our family."

Amanda squeezed Sirius' hand and he looked down at her. He could see the quizzical playfulness that tickled her eyes. It was the first sign of life he'd seen in any of them since Christmas Eve.

"I can live with that. Can you Sirius?"

"I think so and you never know maybe the great grandkids will be glad we did."

She gave him a smile and he watched as she turned back to her grandmother.

"Grandmother Sirius and I are in love. He's the world to me but I will happily spend the rest of my life unmarried if that's what it takes. I don't want you or anyone else to think that we are respecting the decisions you drew up for us before we were even old enough to know our names."

The look on the old Spanish woman's face was enough to encourage Sirius. Holding tightly onto Amanda's hand he forced her to look at him.

"I was just thinking we've only got six months left here. How about we have a couple of children out of marriage. We can start now."

The scream of outrage was deafening but Sirius and Amanda kept eye contact. There was laughter behind both sets of eyes as Sirius turned and looked at the woman one last time.

"If you need us we'll be up in my dorm room."

He turned drawing Amanda into his side. As they were leaving the room they heard the woman's last words.

"Amanda Dixon you are no Granddaughter of mine. And as for you Sirius Black one I relay this to your mother you'll find yourself lacking parents too."

"Good."

He didn't care if she heard his one word reply or not. He led the way up to the common room hoping that the marriage stuff would be over with now. There were far more important things he needed to be dealing with.

* * *

Sorry this took a while. I'm on placement with my course atm plus I'm sick. But the real reason this took so long is that I'd only have written it. For some reason I'd written so much and then gone onto the next chapter. I felt that I needed to address the whole Sirius and Amanda wedding thing as her Grandmother had fitting plans over the Christmas holiday and she ignored them. And her Grandmother wasn't the type of person to just let that slid. Next chapter back to James though.

Kris xx


	41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41

James trudged back towards the seventh floor corridor and the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. For three days he had wandered the corridors on his own. He knew that his friends were worried about him but he couldn't stand to be around them all the time. He needed to be on his own.

Things were changing from the first day. He had spent all of Christmas Day with Lily and her family. Her father and granddad were nice enough but really he hadn't taken much notice of them. He had just sat there staring into space holding Lily's hand.

Then it was about five o'clock that Amanda had returned. He felt strange thinking about the way he was craving her company. He was trying to understand that and all he could really get was the fact she had been the one there with him. She had seen the attack and she had stayed with him in the hours afterwards. He felt that she knew what he was feeling somehow.

Yet he didn't want to be around her. He wanted it to be Lily. But she was still at home. In fact most of his friends were still out there. He had returned to Hogwarts with Amanda to find Sirius and Branwen in the common room. Apparently Alice was spending the rest of the holiday in Frank's and Amanda had talked the others into remaining at home.

Maybe it was a good thing that there were so few of them. James hated the way he was feeling and the thought of having more people watching him wasn't appealing. He knew that when the rest of the house returned he would have to find either the strength to put on a front or spend more time in his dorm room.

But the fact he was so low didn't bother him at the moment. He was allowed to be upset. His mother had been killed in front of him. He knew that he wasn't the only one reeling from the attack. Sirius and Amanda were both more withdrawn than normal. And he realised that for Sirius it was like losing a mother, they were brothers. Maybe that was why he didn't mind them seeing him like this. Maybe that was why he felt secure to sit just the four of them staring into the fire.

"Password."

"Aconite."

The portrait which contained the fat lady in her pink dress swung open and James slipped inside. The fire was lit bringing heat and light to the room. He moved over towards the sofas and spotted Branwen and Sirius on the floor in a game of chess. Amanda was curled up on the sofa with a book in her hands. James sat next to the girl and she shifted slightly allowing space for him to lean against her. He did just that and she wrapped an arm around him as she continued to gaze at her book.

James looked into the fire and let his mind wander. He was so lost in thoughts of nothing that he didn't hear when the two professors entered the room. He didn't notice the way both Sirius and Branwen put aside the board game to look at them. It was only when Amanda gave him a little shake did he take his eyes from the fire and look at the two men.

Dumbledore and Ddraig both looked at ease in front of them but he could see in their faces that something was off. He wondered if maybe the amount of deaths were taking their toll on the professors. It was something that had never crossed his mind before. But students were getting news weekly of deaths of someone they knew or were related too. Surely it fell to one member of staff to talk to and comfort that student in the absence of a parent.

"Are you listening James?"

He shook his head and looked at the headmaster.

"Sorry Sir I missed that."

"That's alright son. I was saying that Taliesin and I need to discuss some matters with you."

He gave a little nod and looked at his friends. Were the expected to leave him alone with the professors because they were making no signs of moving. Ddraig seemed to notice this and spoke softly.

"Your friends are welcome to stay if you want them to."

They all looked at James but he merely shrugged. Really there was no way that they were going to leave. Even if they did Sirius would only nag him until he revealed what the conversation had been about. Before anyone else could speak though James looked straight at Dumbledore.

"Is there any news about the attack?"

The eyes of the man went very soft as he shook his head.

"I have spoken in depth with Alastor Moody and nothing new has come to light. We are assuming at the moment that this was an opportunity taken by the Death Eaters to cause chaos."

"But –"

"We are unsure of this though James. It may turn out that you were all targeted for a specific reason. A source of mine believes that the attack was an attempt by Voldemort to remove you young people from the fight before you can fully enter it. This however has not been confirmed."

James felt his stomach knot. A random act would be hard enough to live with but if the attack had been aimed at him and his friends he would never be able to forgive himself. That would mean that his mother's death was due to the fact that he was a potential threat. He could feel the tears stinging in his eyes and blinked hard trying to keep them at bay.

Things were silent for a moment as if each person was trying to take that little bit of information into their own heads. Then Dumbledore's voice sounded in a low and careful manner.

"James I am afraid that the time is upon us to make arrangements for the funeral. It has been three days since the attack and the time has come to lay your mother to rest."

That did it for James the tears that were threatening shifted and he felt them on his cheeks. He knew that normally he would attempt to hide them from view but there was no need for that today. With a sniff he shook his head. His voice when he found it was shaky and cracking.

"I can't."

A small hand slipped into his and he felt the small reassuring squeeze as the book in the other hand was closed and placed on the arm of the chair. He looked up as the girl shifted so that she was facing him a little more. Her face was soft and he could see something behind her own eyes.

"I know this is hard James but you have to try. Let's start easy. Do you want to bury your mum with your dad? Do you think that's what she would have wanted?"

Amanda's voice was soft and kind. What she was saying was a very easy decision for him. His mum and dad had lived for one another. They had been so happy together and his mother had told him that there would come a day when she would be reunited with him. It only made sense that their bodies should stay together.

"Yes. They should be together."

His fingers were squeezed again. He felt that this was something that he was doing right. He looked towards the two professors waiting for the next question but it came from the floor. His eyes went to Sirius as the boy spoke.

"The wake is normally held in the house –"

"I don't want to go back to the house."

It came out quick and to his ears sounded as if it had run together. But it seemed as if they understood because they were nodding gently. It was Branwen who came up with a solution for this problem.

"You could have it in the Three Broomsticks. Rosemerta wouldn't have a problem with that I'm sure. And it is close to the school which would make matters easier for getting back."

The two professors nodded at that and Ddraig agreed that he would contact Rosemerta and make all the arrangements. After that though a silence started to engulf them. James felt the knot in his stomach grow tighter. It seemed an age before Dumbledore spoke again.

"James I need to know when you want the funeral to be."

James quickly shook his head as he shut his eyes tight. This one was too tough for him. Bury her with his dad had been easy deciding not to go to the house simple but a date was beyond him. Amanda's grip on his hand tightened in a reassuring manner. But it was Sirius who came to his rescue.

"It needs to be before the term starts back up. Ideally I would say before the New Year but that's going to be pushing it a little."

James kept his eyes shut as he listened to the reply from the headmaster.

"I agree that before the start of term is the best idea. I can get things arranged for the second. If that is okay with you James?"

He simply nodded.

Ddraig spoke up now. James realised that this was one of the first things that he had really said about the whole thing. James wondered if maybe he was remembering that less than a year ago he had lost his own remaining parent. Sure Ddraig was older than James but he was beginning to believe that it didn't matter how old you were losing a parent was always going to be difficult.

"There is one more matter that needs to be sorted. I'm sorry James I know this is the hardest thing of all. But the house needs to be seen to. Someone has to go through the things there."

Before James could refuse to do that Amanda was speaking up.

"Professor that is already being taken care of. Frank has promised that as soon as permission has been granted for us to re-enter the house he will tell Alice. Then the two of us are going to go and sort things out. We thought it was the least we could do. But James if you rather –"

"That's fine."

He kept his eyes shut tight and hoped they wouldn't ask him another question he couldn't deal with things like this. He just wanted to lie low and hope that it would all be over with soon.


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42

The next few days turned out to be some of the hardest for the young students. Alice and Amanda spent three days going through the belongings of the Potters. It turned out to be so much work that they enlisted Branwen and Augusta into helping. Frank's mother turned out to have been the best person to ask. She organised everything easily and by the end of the third day all of James' belongings had been transported thanks to Frank and Joe to Sirius' house.

The main problem was that they didn't know what to do with the belongings. James seemed unable to think about such things all he knew was that he wanted to sell the house. They all believed this was a rash movement that he would regret but as friends they supported him. In the end they did the only they could think to do and that was to have the things but in a vault in Gringotts until a time when James could deal with it. By the thirty first of December the Potter house was on the market.

The New Year was a mixed bag. For the four friends in Hogwarts there were no celebrations. For Lily it was subdue night sat around a table filled with board games with her family. Remus spent the night laughing and joking with his family while Peter sat listening to the radio whilst reading a book while his mother passed out in the living. As for Alice and Frank they spent the evening with his family before being dragged to a pub with the Wild boys in time for the midnight celebrations.

Once the night was over and the daylight shone reality began to hit all the friends. They were faced with a funeral the following day and started to prepare themselves for it. The second of January arrived with a brisk wind and a clear sky. The mourners made their way to the church where the service was going to be held.

At eleven o'clock the bells sounded as the last stragglers took their seats. Outside stood a small group of people waiting for Jacqueline's final arrival. Lily shivered as she pulled her cloak closer.

"I hate this so much."

Branwen gave her a brief hug while Amanda and Alice shared a look. The four girls were suppose to meet the boys outside but so far none of them had arrived. Lily knew that Sirius and James had gone to the formers home that morning which was where the boys were all meeting. When Lily had arrived Amanda and Branwen had already been at the church and Alice arrived not long after with Frank's family.

In the twenty minutes they had been there Lily learned that James wasn't dealing with things very well. She discovered that he had played a very small part in the funeral arrangements and that his family home had been cleaned out by the other girls. He hadn't even decided who would carry the coffin. So the other boys had decided that they all would.

"They're really late."

Amanda looked at her watch again before looking at the other girls.

"Maybe we should go take our seats."

Lily shook her head at Alice's words. But Alice looked like she knew that it was a bad idea as she had said it. Something that had never been spoken but seemed to have happened was a sense of unity. When one person hurt they all did. This for them was a family affair and they would all face it as one.

It was another fifteen minutes before a portkey activated and stood just away from them were the six boys and the coffin. In complete silence the six boys lifted the wooden box onto their shoulders and started for the doors. Lily took her place behind Remus and Peter who were at the back and with Branwen at her side entered the church.

James held onto Lily's hand as he watched the coffin lowered into the ground. For the first time in over a week there were no tears in his eyes. They had all been shed before this day. He kept his eyes on the inscription that simply stated his mother's name.

When it was settled in the ground he stepped forward and took a handful of dirt. He dropped it on top and stood back. He watched silently as Sirius stepped forward next followed by Remus, Peter, Frank and Joe. Once the six boys had done their duty Lily took her place then Alice, Branwen and finally Amanda. The ten friends stood together at the graveside and watched as other friends took their turn.

Then one by one they began to leave. Before long just the ten friends stood there. No words had been uttered between them since they had arrived at the church. James didn't mind the silence; it was filled with pain and memory. They all had lost people and his mother was the latest. Sadly he knew that she wouldn't be the last and that made all this harder.

Finally Amanda seemed to find her voice.

"I'm going to head to the wake. They'll be expecting at least one of us there to speak to the guests."

James wondered if she meant one of the 'family' members or one of the survivors. But he didn't ask her as she walked off to the appointed spot for apparition. She wasn't alone though as Sirius holding tightly to her hand followed.

That seemed to be the turning point in it all. In pairs his friends departed the graveyard until James was left there with Lily. Her delicate hand had been tucked into his all the way through the service and remained there now.

"Lily."

"Yes James."

"I don't want to face all those people at the wake."

"I know."

"Can't I just stay here?"

She leaned her head onto his shoulder.

"We'll stay as long as you want to."

And they did. They stood there together until darkness began to fall over them. Then as one they went back to the school completely forgetting the wake. But James knew he wasn't needed there the others would take care of everything for him.


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43

Remus curled up on the floor of the shack. His body ached after his first night of transformation. Being the wolf was never easy and he felt particularly bad today. Maybe it was because the full moon fell on the fifth of January this month. Normally the days of the full moon didn't bother him that much. But this month it did.

The school term had started back on the third which was a hard thing for them. Jacqueline's funeral had been on the Sunday, the final day before term started back up. Luckily there had been no lessons since the students had spent the day arriving back from their Christmas holidays. But that had meant a lot of noise.

While James and Lily had not turned up for the wake the rest of them had. They had all had a little too much to drink that night. Nobody had intended for that to happen it was something that had snuck up on them. Amanda had been right about people wanting to speak to them. They had been asked about James and the attack by a lot of people. And in the talking nobody really kept track of the amount they drunk. Before they knew it they were being led up to the school.

The Monday therefore they had been rather worse for wear. And having the others arriving meant that their headaches were made worse. It must have been a funny sight because James had actually cracked a smile. Maybe it had been the way that Peter had smacked Sirius in the stomach when the elder boy had loudly complained about the noise right in Peter's ear.

Remus had much experience of this sort of thing and although he hated it he knew the best way to handle it. He had sat in a corner with his head resting on the arm of the chair just looking into the fire. He barely spoke and just sat in silence. Alice seemed to have taken the same course of action while Branwen hadn't left the dorm room. Sirius was the funniest one because he just couldn't stop complaining and after an hour Amanda went back to bed to keep out of his way.

But thankfully that day had passed and lessons had started on the Tuesday. Remus had felt terrible still but it was the pull of the moon that was the cause on the second day. Yet he still managed to make it to all four of his lessons that day. But while everyone headed to dinner he had made his way to the hospital wing. Then as the darkness started to fall he was led to the path that took him to his special room.

The first night he didn't think had been too bad. He remembered a large dog in the room with him. He was more thankful these days for his friends than maybe he showed. They made his transformations more bearable. Yet he hadn't expected any of them to turn up this month. James was still grieving as was Sirius and Peter didn't feel able to control the wolf on his own. Yet Sirius had been there.

Rolling his shoulders he tried to get the knot out of his back. It wasn't working though. He shook his head as he sat in the old torn up chair. He hated this part. When the morning had come he had made his way back up to the hospital wing and spent it there under the care of the matron. It was a pretence just in case some student got in and didn't find him there.

But even though he had been groggy and sore he hadn't wanted to stay there this month. It was difficult for him. And it came down to one thing. The night of the full moon happened to fall on his eighteenth birthday. He wasn't expecting much from the day itself what with everything that had happened but he had hoped not to spend it as a wolf.

A small gasp left his mouth. The pull of the moon was getting stronger. Night had fallen properly. His birthday was about to end. A scream escaped his mouth as a wolf jumped off a large chair and started to tear at it.


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Lily sat on the sofa with her legs wrapped under her body. The fire was warm and she could feel herself start to drift off to sleep. She liked the evenings when the common room had emptied and she could happily make herself at home.

Sometimes she found herself still surprised by how at ease she felt in this place. This wasn't what she had expected from life when she had been younger. She could remember the dreams she had had. It had been simple. She would go to the local school two years behind Petunia and they would be best of friends. Then when they left school they would both get married and live in houses in the same street and raise their children together.

It had been a simple ideal and one that seemed a million years away. She couldn't imagine that life anymore. Hers was far more complex. No matter what she wanted she knew that there would be an element that she had never considered and that would be survival. She understood now that this school represented safety.

She had underestimated the problems in the wider community. She wasn't stupid and blind to it. Last year had been a wake up call. But Ginny's death even though terrible had still seemed to her to be a chance attack. She had heard through conversations with Remus that Ginny's death had been a message to her brothers that had refused Voldemort.

It had never crossed her mind at the time that anyone else would feel that touch. Then Joe's mother disappeared and Alice's family killed. But again Lily had underestimated the problem. Word had gotten out about a secret project Joe's father had worked on and how the notes had remained in the family home. It was something that Voldemort wanted destroyed. His mothers attack had been a sad act of cleaning up unfinished business. And Alice's family well Lily knew that they were involved in the fight against Voldemort. But they were just tragic incidents that didn't show what was really happening.

It had been the trial that had started to change Lily's mind. The papers had been filled with information for two weeks before and a month after it. The details of attacks that people were being linked to and the horrors finally made Lily wake up to the truth. They were attacking randomly. The people who were killed were normal people going about their lives. Yet Lily had still felt that she would be safe, even with the fact in front of her that they were attacking muggleborns like herself.

The final nail in her coffin of innocence had been the attack in Hogsmeade. It was the students that had been the target. It was something she understood though she loathed to admit it. They were trying to prevent the next generation. Today's students were tomorrows Aurors; they were the ones who would fight the Death Eaters.

But it had been something more than that as well. It had been the way that she had reacted. Her mind had told her that people were in danger and that she could help. So she went to their aid. She may have been naïve about the extent of the danger but she knew that there were people watching that knew who she was. She knew that news would reach Voldemort of those that had fought against him. She knew her name was among them.

That was when Lily thought her life in the wizarding world would be tainted. How could she feel safe here anymore? But it was strange because she did. Maybe a lull in the attacks towards people she knew had helped that. Her friends hadn't lost a single person since that attack until Christmas. It had been a false sense of security.

She thought that in the aftermath of the Christmas attack she would be more worried and yet she still wasn't. The truth was hard and she understood that as soon as she left Hogwarts she was a target. But she still felt safe. It was hard to explain. She half understood the reasons for Jacqueline's attack and it was something nobody was talking about.

She would look at James and see the hurt all over his features but what really made it worse was the guilt he was clearly carrying. The attack hadn't been random and Jacqueline hadn't been the target. James had been the one they were after.

That news was the thing that terrified Lily. Dumbledore had called the four who had been in the house into his office that evening and spoken to them. He had confirmed that he had gotten information regarding the attack from a reliable source. Lily was unsure of all the details because Amanda had been shaking when she had told Lily.

What she knew was that the Death Eaters were targeting youngsters they thought could potentially be a threat. Lily had been right about the outcome of the Hogsmeade attack. A list had been composed and they were trying to take out those that would be trouble. That attack at the Potter house had originally been for James and Sirius. However when word had come of the two girls staying they had been added to the list. Jacqueline had been the innocent victim of an attack on the teenagers in her house.

The four friends had reacted very differently. Alice was upstairs in bed. She had cried herself to sleep. It was clear to all of them that she was in shock over the information. She had after all played a very limited roll in that attack. But she had made her alliance clear through other actions.

Amanda had stormed around in a huff before declaring the need for a bubble bath. She had been gone now for two hours and had yet to return. While Sirius had yelled something about Remus and stormed off. Lily thought that unwise after all it was the full moon and the boy would be in wolf form.

Yet those three didn't affect Lily too badly. It was James. He hadn't returned to the common room with them. In fact he still hadn't returned. That was the reason Lily was sat up waiting. She was tired and wanted sleep but she needed to see him. She needed to speak to him.

What she would say was still unclear in her mind. She had no idea what was running through his mind. Was he blaming himself now? Was he more resolved to stand up and fight? All she knew was that she was in dire need to see that he was okay.

The chiming of the clock told her that it was now midnight. The portrait opened and she stood up expecting James. But it was only Amanda. She looked tired and there was something in her eyes.

"You're out past curfew again Mand."

"Yeah I know got detention Monday night thanks to one of your little minions."

"How many times do I have to explain that the prefects are not my minions?"

Amanda gave her a little smile as she made her way over to the sofa.

"You're up late."

"I'm waiting for James."

"He hasn't come back yet?"

Lily just shook her head. Amanda gently patted her arm.

"I'm sure he's fine. He just needs time to clear his head."

"What if he's planning on doing something stupid?"

"He won't. I'm going to head up to bed. Don't stay up too late we've got Herbology first thing."

Lily didn't respond as she watched the flames dance. Time seemed to slow down and yet speed up that night. She felt her eyes close and then they would flutter open again only to close within moments.

"Lily."

The voice was quiet and seemed far away. Struggling against sleep she opened her eyes to see James kneeling on the floor in front of her.

"Why are you sleeping on the sofa?"

"James?"

"Lily what's wrong?"

"Nothing I was waiting up for you."

He gave her a strange look as he stood up. She stretched and got to her own feet sneaking a look at the clock. It was nearing four in the morning.

"You should have gone to bed."

"Where have you been?"

"That doesn't matter."

"James I was worried."

With a sigh he took her hand in his.

"You didn't have to."

"But you didn't come back from your meeting with Dumbledore."

His expression changed as he turned looking at the ashes that stood in the heath. Lily stepped up behind him and wrapped her arms around his middle resting her head on his back.

"James you do know that it wasn't your fault right."

"It was my fault. She's dead because of me."

"No. She's dead because Voldemort told his Death Eaters to attack you. The fault lies with them."

"But if I kept my nose out of that fight –"

Lily tugged James forcing him to look at her.

"Listen to me. You are not to blame for any of this. When that attack happened I know that I just reacted. I knew that I could help so I did. You're a good guy James and there's no way you could have stood back and just watched when you knew that you could help. You did what was right, and that scares Voldemort. He doesn't understand how people can do something for others without getting something in return. That's his weakness. So he attacks people like us who are willing to help. Trust me when I say your mother would rather have a son who risks his life to help than one who stands back and watches Death Eaters kill helpless people."

"But she's dead because of that."

"I think it was an excuse. I think your mother was highly moral and would have done something herself if things kept going the way they are. She would only have let them hurt her family for so long. And she died James fighting to keep you all alive. She could have run, she could have apparated away without fighting. But she must have known what they were there for. So she tried to defend you. Instead of blaming yourself be proud that your mother was the strong woman who helped us all."

"I wish she had just left."

"If she had and they had killed you she wouldn't have been able to live."

"How do you know that?"

"Because she was a mother. I might not have children James but I have a father that would give the world for me. And I have a grandfather who has to watch his son die. I know that Pa would do anything to save my dad. It's what parents do."

James held her close.

"I miss her."

"Of course you do. But she's still here. She's part of you James. And she'll never really leave you."

She held him tightly as if to make her point.


	45. Chapter 45

Chapter 45

Amanda closed the door behind her and walked out into the empty corridor. She knew it was late and passed curfew but the exact time was a mystery to her. Her mind had gotten lost on details as she had lain among the bubbles watching as her skin became more wrinkled with each passing moment.

Dumbledore's message to them was something that sent shivers through her body and yet didn't surprise her in the least. She had seen first hand what Death Eaters were capable of. She had seen the passion with which they served their cause and knew that they would fight until either defeated or victorious.

The idea that they thought to attack the figures they thought would stand against them was understandable in her book. If she were in their shoes she would do the same. But it wouldn't be seventh years she was focused on it would be new graduates. People who were just showing their potential.

But the thing that kept going through her mind was whether she found it strange that they thought her a threat to them. Had she really shown that sort of strength? Did they think that she could possibly hurt them?

She knew that there were times in her past where she had hurt them. The trial only a year ago had shown that her alliances were against them. But that was a unique situation. She had had information that she had used against them. She knew absolutely nothing of their intentions now. She had no contact with family so wasn't hearing snippets of information like she had in the early days. So although she had hurt them in the past did she have the ability to do so now?

That was the thing that kept her thinking. She had fought against them publicly with words and watched while one of the leading figures went to gaol and another on the run. She had given names of others she knew to be involved and nothing had come of those.

If it was her ability to fight them then there was only one occasion before this attack where that had happened. That had been the attack in May. Looking back she didn't think she had played that key a part in the battle. She had been in the pub for most of it and only emerged towards the end. It was in the aftermath that she felt she had made a difference.

It seemed to her that the choices being made were random. Why attack them? Was it to try and upset the others in the group? She knew that they were a mixed bunch and that some were more likely to be warranted as a threat than others. For example Frank seemed to be the logical one. He was training to be an Auror. So maybe Alice could be explained as a way to get to him.

Then it was easy to explain Branwen. Everyone knew that Ddraig was with Dumbledore through and through. So if she was hurt the man would take it hard. Maybe throw him off his game. Then there was Lily, a muggleborn. A target because of her ancestry. Remus was an easy one to explain as well. Werewolves were joining the ranks they wanted them all. Remus wouldn't join as long as they were together. So get rid of him or the others.

By the end of her bath the water was so cold that she was shivering. Her mind was twisted with so many theories that it felt likely to explode. So deciding that maybe sleep would be the answer to her problems she had dressed and left the room.

Shaking her head as she walked through the corridor she noted that a cold breeze seemed to run through the passageways. It was almost like one of the windows had been left open. But it wasn't something new to the school. In the seven years she had been a student she had wandered these halls after dark on a number of occasions. Because the building was old the cold seemed able to penetrate it so affectively during the winter months. Feeling the chill more following the cold water she had just left behind she wrapped the large cloak tighter around herself.

Maybe half the problem was that she was dressed in clothes too big for her. Since the attack she had been having difficulties sleeping and spent the first few nights curled up besides Sirius. Once term had started back though this became impractical so to try and help he had given her a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt which she wore to bed. She liked the way that his smell lingered on the clothes and so caressed her skin making her believe that he could be next to her. Another shiver ran through her body and she considered pulling the jumper on as well even if it was massive on her.

"Well what do we have here then?"

Amanda froze at the voice. She knew it well enough. Before she could turn Severus was speaking again.

"I believe you have missed curfew. That warrants a detention. Shall we say Monday night I'm sure there will be a professor willing to have you then. Now give me your name and house."

Amanda didn't speak as she slowly turned and looked at the boy, no man stood before her. It felt like a lifetime since she had looked at him closely. He seemed taller than she remembered but also paler.

"Amanda!"

She gave a small snort.

"Who did you think it was?"

"Wearing clothes like that I had no idea. It's not your usual choice."

"It's what I wear to bed. Now if you're done I'd like to get back to my common room."

She turned and had taken three or four steps before she felt him besides her. She stopped and gave him a look which clearly stated that she wasn't in the mood for this sort of crap.

"Where have you been this late?"

She looked him up and down a few seconds before deciding on giving him the truth.

"I was taking a bath."

"What at this time of night?"

"Well it was around eight when I run it."

"Amanda it's after eleven. You can't honestly have been in the bath this whole time."

"I can and I was."

He raised one side of his mouth in a manner that she knew well. When he was teasing and joking it usually sounded normal and most people wouldn't pick up on it. The only indication was the slight turn up on his lips on the left hand side. She waited for the small amount of teasing he was about to issue.

"Trying to scrub off all that Gryffindor dirt?"

She shook her head slightly and closed her eyes.

"No. I was just thinking."

"I hope you didn't hurt yourself."

She snapped her eyes open and stormed passed him.

"That was a joke Amanda."

"I know that!"

She stopped in front of one of the large bay windows. Moonlight flooded the hall and she could clearly see the full moon outside. Her mind went briefly to her friend who was now under its influence. She figured that couldn't be a good way to spend your birthday.

"Amanda are you okay?"

"I'm just tired."

"Then maybe you should be in bed and not having baths in the middle of the night."

A chill ran through her again and she pulled Sirius' jumper over her head. As she slipped it on she inhaled deeply taking in his scent. A calming sort of feeling took over her. Still she wrapped her arms around her body as if to keep the small amount of heat in.

"It wouldn't mater what time I go to bed Severus. I still wouldn't sleep."

He gave her a strange look and it seemed as if he was fighting his better judgement. After a few moments he spoke in a soft soothing tone. It was the sort of voice most people would never hear uttered from his mouth.

"Is it because of what happened at Christmas?"

Without consideration she lowered herself onto the sill of the window. The cold air pushed against her back but it was lost on her as she stared ahead.

"It's hard to feel safe in the nights now. And I know that's a stupid thing to say since this is Hogwarts and nothing bad can happen to us here. But it's sort of buried deep inside me now that night is dangerous. It's as if I'm half expecting to be attacked again."

"But you've been attacked before."

She gave a snorted sort of chuckle as she shook her head uselessly at her cousin.

"That doesn't make it any better. Really it makes you more paranoid. I've been attacked twice, what's to stop it happening a third time."

"But you got involved in both attacks voluntarily."

"What do you mean by that?"

She watched as he shifted her a little and sat on the sill next to her. His eyes looked at a portrait on the wall opposite.

"The Hogsmeade attack. You didn't have to get involved in that. You could have stayed out of it."

"Really how?"

"You could have done what the Slytherins did and just kept your wand in your pocket and refused to fight."

"I'm not a Slytherin! Severus you weren't even in Hogsmeade that day so how would you know? I was in the pub and the Death Eaters just came bursting in firing spells. There were kids there that didn't know what to do. I had to help to get them to safety. Plus it was instinct I could see that my housemates needed help. There weren't many of us there that knew enough to help Flitwick and Tad… I had to do something."

"No it was your choice. Just like it was your choice to leave the pub and fight. You didn't have to do it."

"Okay fine so I chose to get involved that time. But how could I have not got involved in the second one?"

"You could have apparated away as soon as you saw what was happening."

Amanda closed her eyes and remained silent. There was no way that she would have been able to leave her friends. Maybe her cousin had a point in the fact that her choices had got her there but that didn't change how she felt now.

"Were you afraid?"

"Yes. There's nothing scarier than coming face to face with another wizard and knowing that their goal is to hurt or even kill you. In that moment you're fighting for your life and you have no idea what is going to be thrown at you. If you get out alive it's not because you're the more skilled or the smarter. It's simply down to the fact that you have luck on your side."

"In Hogsmeade I was naïve to it. It didn't cross my mind that I could be seriously hurt. I just saw Rosemerta trying to get the youngsters out the back and I jumped up and fired spells to help protect them. Then the Death Eaters were gone and I was sat with Shane trying to get him to stop rocking and comfort him. But the adrenaline was running by that point. And being in the pub was like being trapped. Your brain doesn't work all you can do is feel the need to do something. Then seeing James and Peter fighting I just went."

"You chose to."

"Yes Severus I did. And it didn't occur to me for a moment what danger I was in until afterwards. I stood there and watched as these people rolling around the floor and the groans and screams and my mind was blank. Then I thought I can help and I was terrified because yes I've spent two summers now in the hospital but I'm not trained but I know basics. And I walked around and I saw horrors and realised it could have been me. And seeing Sirius and James so badly hurt people that I love almost killed me. I thought that I would break down and never function properly again."

"But you did."

"It took me weeks Severus. Remember I was brought up in the same manner you were. I know all the tricks to get people to believe that there is nothing wrong. But I cried myself to sleep for weeks after that. I had terrible nightmares and I even thought Sirius was dead at one point. And you know what I never wanted to have to go through it again. But then came Christmas."

She shook her head and felt her eyes well up with tears. She fought against them as she felt her cousin touch her hand.

"It brought back memories and made it worse?"

"Yes. I was getting changed for bed when I heard Jacqueline scream. Alice and I ran out and saw James and Sirius. Everyone was just staring and then instinct took over. I knew that I could fight; I knew that I could stop the Death Eaters from killing us all. But the entire time in the back of my mind was this fear that we'd all be killed. And when Jacqueline was, well I'm surprised that I didn't fall apart. It was my worry for James that let me keep my head."

"But it's over now Amanda. You can't honestly believe that anybody can get you in Hogwarts. Not with Dumbledore here."

She turned her body so that she was facing him and looked deeply into his dark eyes.

"Logic doesn't matter Severus. I know that I'm safe here but that doesn't take away the nightmares."

"You see the attack."

"I relive the attack. I'm back in that moment and I'm feeling everything all over again. But its worse because my subconscious shows me the thing that scared me the most."

"And that is?"

"Jacqueline isn't the one on the stairway in the duel. She isn't the one that's killed over and over again every night in my dreams. She's replaced by Sirius. And I have to watch him die and I wake up terrified that it actually happened and suddenly I don't feel safe anymore."

She sniffed hating the fact that at some point her tears had shown themselves. She felt the movement of the man next to her as she closed her eyes to try and stop their flow.

"You actually love Black don't you?"

"More than I can express. I never meant for it to happen but now that it has I can't imagine not loving him. And the idea that he could be taken from me scares me more than anything else."

Severus stood up suddenly as if to leave but before he could walk away she spoke up.

"Do you know anything about the attack? Anything that hasn't officially been released."

"How would I?"

They were staring at each other now. Neither one spoke and it was like a challenge. Both knew the rules and both were demanding to be the champions in this.

"I'm not a Death Eater Amanda."

"Yet."

The atmosphere changed and a strain came back to the air. It was the same feeling that had been lingering around them throughout their teenage years. It was the knowledge that they were different people who wanted different things. It was the realisation that friendship wasn't attainable for them. It was the death of their childhood bliss.

"If I knew anything what makes you think that I would tell you anyway."

"You probably wouldn't."

Amanda stood up and turned to continue on her walk back to the common room. Severus was walking in the opposite direction. Neither had turned the corner when she spoke again.

"Do you honestly want to be one of them?"

"It's what I was raised to believe Amanda. It's what is expected of me."

"I was raised to believe the same things Severus. But I've learnt the difference between what's right and wrong."

"We agreed years ago Amanda that on this topic we would have to agree to disagree."

She took another step and heard him call her name. She didn't stop though; she didn't want to listen to what he had to say on the matter. Simply as she turned the corner she called out to him knowing he would hear her words.

"Our paths have come to a fork in the road and we've both taken different ones. So this is goodbye."

* * *

So I haven't had a Severus chapter for a while and I wanted to explore where Amanda had gone while Lily waited for James. James and Sirius had become Prongs and Padfoot and were out with Moody and she was with Severus.

Basically I wanted to show that the pair keep saying goodbye and yet keep getting drawn together. Because behind their differences they really do love each other. Basically because I started this story before the series finished Amanda is sort of Lily's character for Snape. And as much as they both hate what the other stands for they can't really ever say goodbye.

Oh and to Melissa thank you so much for the review that you gave me and good luck with your own story. If it makes you feel better I started writing this one when I was 15 and I'm coming up to 25. This has been a very major challenge to write and I think the more you get into the story the easier it is to write. I know these characters very well, but I will say some are easier to write than others. I find Amanda the easiest of all and Sirius. And as for Peter its going to happen outside of Hogwarts. It's when they are split up in everyday life that weaknesses begin to show. And that's all I'm going to say.

Kris xx


	46. Chapter 46

Chapter 46

Petunia Dursley rinsed the last dinner plate and put it on the rack to drip dry a little. In the living room the television was blasting and she could hear Vernon's laughter at the comedy show he was watching. She gave a little sighed smile as she picked up the cloth and began to wipe the units down.

Married life wasn't how she had imagined it would be but she loved it anyway. The fact that she was spending the rest of her life with a man that she loved and had somewhere along the lines had become her best friend was amazing.

Sure it wasn't all daffodils and roses as she had once imagined but it was better than being single. She loved her house in Privet Drive down in Surry. She loved the fact that she was the home keeper and she took deep pride in it. She was already planning on how pretty her garden would be by summer.

The only downside was that as a married woman she was expected to live in her own house. This was something that she had always looked forward to. Until her fathers illness. Now she liked to be close at hand so that she could help whenever she was needed. After all it wasn't as if her sister was around to help them.

That was something that riled her. In the early days she had envied her sisters charmed life in a wizarding school. She had thought it unfair that since she was the eldest she hadn't been allowed to be there. And then she had seen it for the freak reality that it was.

Sometimes she still had nightmares of men in masks firing colourful mist towards her whilst in a small cottage in Wales. It was an experience that made her realise that she had been lucky to have been overlooked by the freak school.

Not going there had meant that she had been able to be the rock to her father. She had been the one that had helped him and cared for him when there was no-one else. She had proven her love for him. It had also allowed her to find the love of her life Vernon and had gotten her this fantastic life.

She had pretty much cut her sister from her life as much as she could. She knew that Lily would always be lingering in the background but at least it wasn't something she had to hide from her Vernon anymore. She knew that there would be birthday cards and Christmas presents but hopefully that would be the extent of it.

"Tunia your grandfather's on the phone."

She shook her head wondering how she had missed the ringing. Heading in the living room she took the phone from the desk where Vernon had laid it.

"Hello Pa."

"Tuney thank god you're home."

The words he spoke were enough to set her pulse racing but the tone scared her.

"What's happened Pa?"

"Your dad has taken a turn for the worse. The hospital just called me. They say we should all get down there."

Petunia's mind fell apart.

"Tuney?"

"I'm on my way Pa."

She hung up the phone and tried to stop the shaking. She felt bile in her throat as she rummaged for the car keys.

"You going out?"

"It's dad."

Vernon turned the T.V off in a second and was next to her.

"Let's get to the hospital then."

She nodded as she turned to leave. But two bright eyes sat on the windowsill caught her attention. Her no good sister had written to her and was awaiting a reply. It had been a simple letter asking Petunia how she was and more importantly about their dad.

Grabbing a piece of paper and a pen she scribbled a quick message.

_Lily_

_Pa's had a phone call from the hospital. They want us there as soon as possible. You need to get down. This might be it._

_Petunia_

She tied the note to the owl's foot and watched it leave. There was nothing else she could do. Pulling her winter coat on she stepped outside hoping that she would get there in time for the end.


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47

"It isn't my fault you were the one that did it!"

"It was your idea."

"And if I had said that we should all take a running dive off the Astronomy tower without a broomstick would you have done it?"

"Probably! This is me you're talking to."

Lily sat silently on the sofa next to Amanda watching as Sirius and James bickered over the outcome of their latest prank. James had jokingly stated that they should set fire to the staff room. Apparently Sirius had liked the idea and gone ahead with it.

Lily couldn't believe that he had done it but that was Sirius. He had been caught by Professor McGonagall and given a months worth of detention, had been banned from the next Hogsmeade visit and had lost the house two hundred points.

Now the two boys were arguing. Sirius felt that James should take some of the blame because it had been his idea. He was claiming that as Head Boy he had been organising pranks and Sirius had been seeing them through. Apparently Sirius had thought he was serious.

James was taking a stand though against that. He was adamant that it was said as a joke and Sirius should have known the difference. They were getting nowhere with words and Lily had a feeling that a couple of punches might be had before it was over.

"It's not my fault if you're thick enough to actually set fire to the staff room."

"I would never have done it if you hadn't have told me to."

"Well then you should stop doing what I say and use your own brain."

Talking had certainly passed as the two boys yelled at each other. They were stood barely ten centre meters apart and their voices were carrying up to the dorms where most of the house had retired to bed. Lily didn't know if it was because it was passed ten and the students were going to bed or they could sense a volatile meeting approaching.

It was rather strange Lily thought. She couldn't remember the last time anyone had fought like this within their group. It must have been before Ginny's death that much was sure. The younger students wouldn't remember the times when their group had been divided and the other students would run for cover. It was quite refreshing to have a reminder of the old days.

"It's your fault."

Sirius pushed James and he stumbled backwards a few paces. James reacted instantly and jumped at Sirius. In a moment James had his arms wrapped around Sirius' neck as the other boy bent over trying to throw James over his shoulder. Lily simply shook her head as they started yelling insults at each other.

Lily turned to look at Amanda. The girl had her arms crossed over her chest and slowly was shaking her head in a manner that said quite plainly that she couldn't believe that they had reverted back to these old ways.

Lily stood up and was about to break the pair up when she heard a tapping. Turning she saw an owl at the window. In a few moves she reached up and tugged the window open. The cold night air of early January rushed into the room. She shivered as she reached up and took the letter from the bird. It turned quickly and flew back out into the dark. Lily closed the window quickly and looked at the name on the envelope.

It was strange to see an owl arrive so late in the evening but it wasn't unheard of. Over the last few years owls tended to bring letters throughout the day. Although it was still customary for breakfast to be the main delivery time. This owl hadn't been a students own but one of the school owls and it seemed to have been on a mission to bring the letter. Lily was surprised when she saw it was her name on the envelope and even more so when she realised the handwriting was that of her sister.

She had sent Petunia a brief letter two days earlier asking about how she was settling into married life. She had asked questions regarding the end of their Christmas break since Petunia had barely spoken to her since the moment James had arrived. But more importantly had been her questions on her father's health.

She had been expecting a reply but Petunia's were usually a brief scribble that would arrive at breakfast. She had never received any mail at another point in the day. Her stomach felt tight wondering what Petunia could have to say that was so urgent. Then a horrid thought struck her. It had to be her dad.

Lily ripped the envelope open and pulled the small piece of lined paper free. Her sisters' small print took up only three lines.

Lily

Pa's had a phone call from the hospital. They want us there as soon as possible. You need to get down. This might be it.

Petunia

She took a deep gulp and then before she could steady herself fell to the floor.

"Lily!"

She could see that James still had Sirius in a headlock. Sirius had flung his arms behind his body and was gripping James hard. Amanda was trying to pull them apart but seemed to have been dragged into it as one of her arms was wedged between Sirius' neck and James forearm.

Both boys released each other and James was across the room holding her within seconds.

"Lily what's wrong."

She was pointing at the note which had fluttered down near her feet. Amanda picked it up and gasped herself. She grabbed Sirius' wrist with one of her hands as she opened and closed her mouth. The boy took the letter from her and gave a groan. He spoke softly towards her.

"Lily I'm sure everything will be alright."

"What's going on?"

James was looking from her to the others. She finally found her voice but it sounded tiny to her ears.

"They think dad is running out of time. I have to get there."

She struggled to get up but James didn't let go of her. He tugged her to her feet and took the letter from Sirius. He didn't speak as he pulled her out of the portrait hole and led her through the corridors that they both knew so well.

She had been out this late before. She was Head Girl and patrolled the halls in the evenings sometimes. Plus she wasn't the best behaved of students. Like her friends she had occasionally broken the rules. But something felt wrong about it tonight. Maybe it was the fact she felt she shouldn't be there.

"Mint humbugs"

The stone gargoyle moved aside and moving spiral steps appeared. Lily felt like things were standing still as she was pulled by James onto the steps. It was as if somebody else was controlling her movements. The oak door was in front of Lily in moments but it was James who raised the griffin knocker.

"Enter."

James directed Lily into the room and she found herself in a chair. She didn't hear the conversation that went on around her. Her mind was too busy with facts. How long had it taken the owl to get to her? Was it already too late?

"Lily touch this."

She wasn't sure of anything. She felt something pushed into her hand and then a pulling at her navel. It felt surreal as her feet touched on hard pavement. A hand slipped into hers and she squinted through the darkness to see James.

"Professor Dumbledore gave me permission to come with you. He seems to think you aren't in the right frame of mind for solo travel."

He squeezed her hand and led her towards the entrance of the hospital. As soon as her feet touched the slippery white tiles she found that she was dragging James along in her wake. They were in a lift heading up towards the fifth floor before she even realised what she was doing.

Then the doors opened and she walked over to one of the nurses' stations. A young woman with black curly hair and a rather large nose looked up at her.

"Can I help? Visiting hours are long over?"

"I'm Lily Evans. I had a call telling me to get here as soon as possible. My father is Dudley Evans –"

"Follow me please."

Holding James' hand tightly she was led down a corridor. A solid door was pushed open and she stepped inside. She found Pa Evans sat on a chair next to a single bed. Petunia was in a chair on the other side while Vernon stood at the end of it.

She let go of James' hand as she rushed towards the bed. Her father was wrapped under the blanket and she could only see his face. She felt her eyes widen as she took in his appearance. He had lost a lot of weight before Christmas but now he looked gaunt. His skin had taken on a slight bluish tint and his lips were all cracked.

For a few moments she just stood there. Nobody looked at her. Her father's eyes were closed as if he were asleep. She was frightened in that moment. In the silence it was easy to hear his breathing. It wasn't regular as normal and there was a sort of gurgling as though he had something trapped in his throat.

"He sleeps a lot these days Lily."

She turned and looked at Vernon. He seemed to be the strongest person in the room. He stood with his arms by his sides as he looked down the bed. Petunia on one side had her arms wrapped around herself as she cried and Pa seemed to be zoned out as he watched his son sleep.

"What's happening?"

It was James who was speaking now. He moved over and stood beside Vernon as Lily lightly rested on the edge of the bed.

"He's in what is known as end stage cancer. The doctors think he's got days left at the most. He's finding it difficult to stay awake but they say that's normal but when he's awake he's hallucinating. He keeps talking to Jasmine, his wife. Then there's the breathing difficulties, he's unable to clear his throat that's why he's making that noise and his breathing has become slower."

Vernon's voice faded and Lily kept her eyes on her father. This was the end she could feel it. And there was no way she would be leaving his side.

* * *

Okay so you've got 2 chapters because the Petunia one was so short. But I wanted to show that even though she has decide to cut Lily out of her life when it comes to the important things they are still sisters and there is contact. And the next few chapters should show the Evans/Dursley/Potter relationship and I hope it might shed some light on what is to come later on in the story

Kris xx


	48. Chapter 48

Chapter 48

Sirius sat silently on the sofa as chaos took over the common room. It was Saturday twenty second and it was a Hogsmeade weekend. As of the rules he along with all students under seventeen was banned from the visit. But even if he hadn't been he didn't think he would go.

His mind was on Lily. She had received the letter from her sister late the night before and she and James had disappeared. Neither had returned to the common room yet. He knew that since he had sat up all night. He hadn't been alone in that. As soon as the two had gone Amanda had disappeared up the stairs to tell the girls.

It had felt like one of the longest nights in history. He had experienced bad nights in the past. There had been the night he had found Amanda hanging from her bed. The night that Ginny had been murdered. And then very recently the night Jacqueline had been murdered. The nights were becoming unbearable.

He hadn't moved as Branwen and Alice had sat on one of the armchairs while Remus and Peter dropped onto the floor. Amanda had curled up against him and they had waited. Nobody knew how long they would be expected to wait this was something different for them. Nobody had lost somebody due to natural causes.

Slowly the night had slipped away and around him his friends had dozed. Nothing was said as the early morning winter light brushed against the windows. Slowly the house had awoken and the room had come to life.

Students headed down to breakfast and out into the grounds to enjoy the snow. Whilst others lazed around the common room working on projects due or playing games. Yet the six friends remained silently by the fire.

It must have been around ten that somebody dared to break into their quiet. The portrait had opened and Joe had walked in. He had promised Branwen to visit. There was no Quidditch game that afternoon due to a world cup qualifying game the night before. England had beaten Portugal and seemed likely to progress.

"Good morning my lovely friends and what are you all doing?"

All six looked at him but nobody spoke. His eyes went to Alice and he looked quizzical.

"Aren't you supposed to be meeting Frank down in Hogsmeade?"

She didn't react to that and he looked around at them all. It seemed to take him a minute to notice something.

"Where're James and Lily?"

There was still no answer. Sirius wrapped his arm tighter around Amanda as she rested her head on his chest. He felt her arm snake around his body as she clung to him. Gently he rubbed his hand up and down her back in a somewhat soothing manner.

"Merlin has somebody died?"

Joe's tone was hard and his voice loud. Silence took over the common room as the eyes of their housemates finally came to them. It was as though they had been invisible up to that point. It seemed that Branwen finally found her voice to answer him.

"We think James took Lily down to the hospital in London. Her father hasn't got long left."

Sirius watched as the man closed his eyes and raised his hands slowly to his face. He moved over towards the armchair that Branwen and Alice were squeezed into. He took the arm closest to Branwen and sat silently with them.

It was twenty minutes later when Frank arrived. He was more subtle than Joe had been and Sirius suspected that he might possibly have bumped into a professor who had filled him in. He took up a vigil on the floor at Alice's feet and silently they sat all together.

To Sirius that day reminded him of one a year or so earlier. In the middle of the night they had all sat together in silence as they came to realise a friend had lost her life. Now they were together as a group again waiting for the news that a family member had been lost to them.


	49. Chapter 49

Chapter 49

James felt useless as he sat on a stool at the end of Dudley Evans bed. Next to him was a man who had thought him a freak only a month ago. He wondered if Vernon Dursley felt as out of place in the hospital room as he did.

He felt as if he was imposing. Unlike the rest of them he had no relation to the man lying helplessly in the bed. He was Lily's boyfriend but he wasn't engaged to her, he wasn't married to her. He felt as if he had pushed himself into the grief of the family.

It was nearly lunch time and he hadn't eaten since dinner the night before. Neither had Lily and she was beginning to look tired and a little frail to him. She had been coming down with a cold thanks to a water fight that had occurred in charms when Stephen Carwardine a Hufflepuff student had said the wrong spell and caused water to squirt all over the room.

He felt that he needed some food and a drink but so did she. He looked sideways from the chair Lily was curled up in to the one where her grandfather was perched. He looked terrible sat there watching as his son lost grip on reality.

Dudley had regained consciousness around three in the morning. He had woken and looked around. He had seen his father and had spoken to him quietly about a broken wind up car. He had said how he was so sorry and that he hadn't meant to break Anthony's toy. Then he had cried a little.

Within moments he had fallen back asleep. James hadn't known what that had been about until Vernon had spoken up and said it was a hallucination. Dudley had been a child in his own mind and was confessing to his father that he had broken his brother's favourite car.

That had been the first of a series of hallucinations. Near seven he had woken back up and had focused this time on Lily. He had instantly asked her for some apple pie. He assured her that he had been a good boy in school and had finished his homework. Then he had said in a tiny voice…

"Please mummy I love your apple pie."

Then his eyes had closed again. James had seen the tears in Lily's eyes and he had moved and hugged her close. He could feel her shaking. Nobody spoke and James guessed that Lily must take after her grandmother and he had gotten confused by it all.

It was only two hours later that he had a brief conversation with Petunia regarding their children. He seemed to be arguing that Lily should be allowed to go to this school. James figured it was a conversation about Hogwarts and watched silently as Petunia simply nodded and said yes. Then again he was asleep.

James knew that Petunia looked like her mother. Lily had told him that on her wedding day she had felt as if she had been watching her mother. He felt as if this was a family that was now putting on a brave face as they realised that the man they knew was quickly leaving them and he couldn't tell who they were anymore.

The only ones he hadn't addressed were Vernon and himself. He wasn't surprised by that he had only met the man a handful of times and he guessed that he and Vernon were sat too far away for him to see them.

James looked once more at Lily's grandfather and thought that the man needed something. He looked like he was losing strength himself. Something to eat or drink might be what he needed. A glance at Petunia made him think back to the period just before fourth year when she had stood in his house. She was as pale and looked to be in shock again. She too needed food.

Standing up James looked at the room. It was silent as he spoke to them all.

"I'm going to get us all something to eat."

"You don't have any money."

Lily's voice was so soft he barely heard it. He put his hand into his pocket and pulled out a couple of gold coins.

"Yes I do."

She turned her face from her father to look at him for a moment.

"That's wizarding money James. You need muggle money here."

"Oh…"

"I'll come with you."

He turned and watched as Vernon stood up. The two left the room to silence and walked towards the cafeteria. James was looking at the floor. He even felt out of place here. As they entered the room he looked at the man.

"Do you think I'm intruding?"

The man picked up a tray and walked towards the pre-packed sandwiches. James took the silence to mean yes.

"I've only met Lily twice. I've been with Petunia for three years and I've only met her sister twice. The first time was at the wedding and then the two weeks at Christmas. She seems like a strong woman but even strong women need support during the difficult times."

Vernon picked up a cheese and onion sandwich and put it on the tray. James reached for a ham salad as he spoke.

"She has her grandfather and Petunia for that."

Vernon was putting a chicken and bacon sandwich onto the tray as he spoke next.

"Yes she does. They're going through this together. But that doesn't mean that they are who she wants."

He put a bacon lettuce and tomato pack onto the tray as James placed a tuna one there. As they walked towards a drink section James spoke again.

"But I'm not family. Lily has been my friend for seven years and my girlfriend for four months but you you're his son-in-law. You have a right to be here. What right do I have?"

James silently watched as Dudley made teas for everyone. He watched the man put plastic cups under a machine and press some button that made it squirt out. There was a silence for a few moments before the man found his voice again.

"You spent a day with us at Christmas and I'm guessing you weren't yourself. I've never lost a parent so I don't know how you were feeling. But you spent it with our family. When you left with that girl Dudley and John had a conversation."

"They felt that you're Lily's one. Dudley said that he was glad to have gotten to met you and see how you and Lily are around each other. He told John that you're the next addition to this family. He was sure that you and Lily will end up married with a bunch of children. And he said he's sorry that he met you under those circumstances because he wanted to formally welcome you to the family."

James felt his mouth drop as they walked over to a cashier to pay for their supplies.

"Lily never told me."

"She doesn't know. When you left she headed out to see someone called Frank. There was only the four of us in the house. So you can question why you're here today. But I think you're here because you love Lily. She's going through something that you understand and you want to be there for her like she was you. Don't question whether or not you belong because you do."

The two shared a look as James opened the door and they headed back towards the room.

* * *

So you get two chapters again this time. I'm really sorry about how irregular the posting has become but I'm swamped with uni work at the moment I've got exams and assignments coming up. But hopefully this will keep you going for another week or so until I can post again.

Kris xx


	50. Chapter 50

Chapter 50

The room went silent again when Vernon and James left. Lily hugged her knees up to her chin as she watched her father. His skin was cold as ice and still that horrible blue tinge covered it. His breathing was more ragged and getting slower by the minute. The doctor had said that they thought he would be gone by the end of the day.

Lily hated to think that. She had known that a day was coming soon when her father would no longer be with her but she had been hoping for more time. Maybe she was naïve but she had hoped that he would live long enough to see her eighteenth birthday. She had hoped he would see her finish school and get a job. A part of her had even hoped that he would live long enough to see James propose to her and then to see her marry.

She knew that he didn't believe he would live to see that. But she had hoped. Now she was faced with the truth that he wasn't going to make it to February. Her heart felt heavy. There was so much she wanted to tell him and she was running out of time. She looked around the room at her Pa.

"Do you think he can still hear us?"

He looked at her closely.

"They always say that the hearing is the last thing to go."

Lily nodded as she stood up and moved to the side of the bed. She took her fathers hand in hers and lowered her lips to it. She felt the iciness of his skin with her lips.

"Daddy it's me Lily. I need to tell you some things and I wish I had said them before. I'm sorry for all the trouble I caused you when I was younger. I was foolish and rebelling and I never ever meant to hurt you. Because daddy I love you."

"And I owe you so much because I know that you supported my choice to go to Hogwarts. I know it was hard for you to let me go for so long and sometimes when I'm lying awake at night I wish I was at home so that we could have had more time together. I wish that I could have been closer so that when you needed me I could have been there. I wish that I could have had a phone so that we could have spoken everyday."

"Daddy there's something that I need you to know. I will always be your little girl and I will always love you but I will be okay in the world I live in. I know it's dangerous but I promise that I'll be careful. I never told you but I have a job lined up for when I finish I'm going to work in the Ministry in charms, which is my favourite and my best subject."

"And I know you teased me about boys and that you worried about what I would do. But daddy I think I'm falling in love with James and I can just see us being together forever. At least I hope we are. But even if we're not I promise that I will find someone who is honest and loves me. Somebody that you would like."

She was crying and she felt Pa wrap his arm around her. She turned her head into him and cried softly. Then unexpectedly she felt a little grip on her hand. She turned and saw her father looking at her.

"Lily?"

"Yes daddy it's me."

"Petunia?"

"I'm here too daddy."

Petunia took his other hand and he looked at her. His eyes scanned the room and Lily heard him drag in a breath.

"Dad?"

"Over here son."

Pa placed a hand on his sons arm with a small sad smile on his face. Dudley looked between the three and gave a tiny smile.

"All the people I love together in one room."

His eyes closed again and Lily thought he was going back to sleep. His dragging of breath ceased but unlike before within seconds there wasn't a second drag. She felt tears as she looked up and saw that the muscles in his face had relaxed. Two minutes passed and still there was no ragged breath.

"Daddy?"

Petunia's voice was small and littered with tears. Lily could feel that her own eyes were wide as a sob escaped her mouth. She looked at Pa who had fallen back into his chair. His eyes were closed but tears slipped out. Lily dropped from her chair and crawled to her grandfather. Dropping her head onto his lap she let her tears out. In moments she felt a pair of arms over her back as blonde hair brushed against her face. The three sat there hugging each other as their tears fell about them.

A clanging from behind caused them all to look up. Vernon was stood with his hands out a tray of hot liquid and sandwiches sat at his feet. James next to him was looking wide eyed at the bed. The two men turned to one another and James quickly left the room.

Lily wanted him to come back. She wanted him to pull her to her feet and take her in his arms. She wanted him to hold her and whisper nonsense in her ear. Vernon pulled Petunia up and held her close. Then James was back with a nurse. James was straight over to Lily and she was in his arms like she had hoped. His embrace was tight as he rubbed her back with his fingers. The nurse said something and then left.

Lily wanted to remain in James arms but something made her pull away. She turned and gently sat on the arm of the chair and took her grandfather into her arms as she sobbed openly for the first time in her life.


	51. Chapter 51

Chapter 51

James shut the door tight behind him and watched as Lily led her grandfather up a set of stairs. Petunia and Vernon headed into the kitchen of the house he had spent Christmas day in. He watched as the man helped his wife into her seat before heading over to a cupboard. James leaned against the counter as four tumblers were brought out and a bottle of scotch.

Vernon poured sizeable measures and handed one to James before giving Petunia hers. He lifted one in his hand as Lily wandered into the room. As she moved to wrap herself around James Vernon slipped her a glass. The four stood silently together each lost in their own minds.

James couldn't imagine what the others were thinking. His own thoughts were on the death he had just witnessed. It was something completely different to the ones he'd seen before. There was no honour in this death. The man had been stripped of his identity and slowly slipped further away each day. James found himself thankful for the first time that both his parents had met their ends quickly. He couldn't imagine knowing that death was coming the way Dudley had.

He realised that the man who had just died had been as brave as all those that had been lost in the war. Tad had died fighting to save the lives of the students around him. Thomas Scott had died protecting his wife and son; they had been targeted because of the role they played in fighting. Ginny's death had been because people had stood up against Death Eaters, hell even his mother and father had died fighting. But so had Dudley.

It was a different kind of fight than James was use to but equally important. He had been fighting to survive. He had been told that he would die of a disease and yet he had survived an extra two years. Those two years had been because of his determination. He hadn't been ready to give up and go. And wasn't that what they were fighting for? Weren't they fighting for the right to live just as he had?

His grip tightened around Lily's body as she rested her head on his shoulder. She was shattered he could feel it flowing from her. She hadn't slept in over twenty four hours and had just been through something emotionally draining. He wanted to take her up to bed and tuck her beneath the sheets and tell her that she would survive. She was from a family that fought for survival. But somehow he couldn't find the words.

"Is Pa sleeping?"

Petunia's voice was husky and showed that she was as tired as Lily. The red head turned to look at her older sister and made a strange sighing sound.

"I made him take the pill the doctors gave him and he went out almost instantly."

"He needs his rest."

They fell silent again. James felt sorry for the old man upstairs. He had lost his son and that went against nature. Parents were not suppose to bury their children. In an ideal world the parent would go first. That didn't make it easier on anybody but to know that you outlived the person you loved the most in the world, someone who lived because of you. That must be hard. James wondered if the old man would recover from the blow.

"Tuney –"

"Don't call me that."

James saw the way Vernon's eyes widened at that. But he didn't comment.

"Petunia I think you should go lie on the bed."

"No I can't. I have to phone Uncle Tony and the neighbours to tell them what has happened. Then I need to start organising the funeral –"

"I'll phone Tony and the neighbours for you. As for the rest you can't do any of that until Pa gets up and you know it. He'll want it to be you Lily and him organising it. So why don't you go get some rest."

"But –"

James watched as Vernon took his wife's arm and led her out of the room. When they were alone James kissed the top of Lily's head and spoke softly.

"You should get some sleep too."

"I don't think I can."

"Come on I'll stay with you until you fall asleep."

Lily didn't argue and started to pull James out of the kitchen. They walked up the stairs and into a small room. It was almost empty with a few pieces here and there. James realised that they were items Lily had failed to take back to Hogwarts. He noticed a few spell books in the corner and an old cauldron. Then his focus shifted to the bed.

Lily simply pulled the blankets back and climbed in. She tapped the spot next to her for James and reluctantly he climbed in next to her. She curled her body towards him and placed her head on his chest.

"I can't believe this has really happened."

Her voice was so soft that had there been a tiny sound he would have missed it. Wrapping his arms around her he spoke the only words of comfort he could find.

"It's always unexpected. No matter if you know the end is coming you can never prepare yourself for that moment."

"How do you go on?"

He closed his eyes and thought of his own experiences and shook his head.

"We both know it's difficult but time doesn't stop. Death is something that just keeps on coming and all we can do is stop for a moment and remember the person that we've lost. We remember the good times and we put them in a part of our heart where they can live on. Then we go on and survive."

"I wish there could have been something I could have done."

"You did everything you could Lily. You were there when he needed you. You gave him love and the strength that he needed to fight."

"But he couldn't win."

James sighed and pulled her tighter to him.

"I think that there are times when we fight knowing that we'll never win. Your father fought heroically against the cancer so that he could have more time with the people that he loved. So that he could give them support when they needed it. He knew that he couldn't win but that didn't stop him fighting. And to me that makes him as brave as Tad and all the others that fought not knowing if they'd be able to win."

Lily made no sound to that. He thought that maybe she had fallen asleep. Then her voice sounded really small.

"I don't think its something that is comparable James. My father was physically ill and he had no choice but to fight because if he gave up that would be it. With the people killed by fighting they have the choice to do it or not."

James stroked Lily's hair as he thought about the best way he could word this. It was very difficult to explain his thoughts on this matter.

"I think it's the same thing Lily, I honestly do. And it's hard for me to explain but your father he had the opportunity to say I don't want to fight. But he couldn't because he wanted to live and I think that's why people fight in the wizarding world. I think they do it because they can't imagine sitting back and not at least trying everything they can to make their lives better. And that's what your father was doing. I believe that if he was a wizard he'd be on the front line fighting with Dumbledore for everyone."

Lily moved and he felt her hold him tighter as if something frightened her. He held her watching as her eyes closed. Maybe she was so tired that she would go to sleep there and this would be a conversation that they could have later.

"I wish he had been a wizard."

"There was nothing wrong with him being a muggle Lily. I know that certain people are hard on you because you're from a muggle background but your dad was a great man and from what I know of him he loved his life in the muggle world."

"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that wizards don't die from cancer. If he was a wizard he'd still be here."

"You can't know that."

"Why not?"

"Because wizards die."

"Not when they haven't even reached their fifties they don't. The only time they die young is in battles. Wizards don't die from diseases."

"But they do Lily that's why we have Healers. Sure it's not the same diseases as muggles tend to get but we still get ill. We still die because not everything can be healed. I mean Frank's father died from something one of his patients had. And what's to say that your father wouldn't have been killed fighting. He could have been targeted if he was a wizard just because he was your father. Or he could have been out there fighting and gotten killed that way. The truth is Lily muggle or wizard it doesn't make a difference."

"I would have been able to share more with him."

He could hear tears in her voice now.

"He loved you Lily and he knew that he was part of your life. And I'm sure he knew enough."

"He barely knew anything about the wizarding world James. And I hate to admit it but there's been a drift between us. I think that he was closer with Petunia now than he was with me because he could understand all aspects of her life. Because he could see her or speak to her whenever he wanted. I've been removed from him for so long and I wish now that maybe I could have been closer to home so that I could have been with him more."

James leaned forward and kissed Lily's forehead.

"Your father was extremely proud of you Lily. He understood that you have a gift that meant you needed to be away from him so that you could learn to control it. He knew that you loved him, that you were happy and that you were where you belonged. And I think you should stop worrying about that because the most important thing was the fact that he knew that you love him and that will never change."

Silence fell between them for a while. James shifted slightly and looked down at the girl who was wrapped around him. She looked as if she was made to fit beside him in that way. Any other time and he would have thought that this was the best thing ever. But today wasn't a day to get excited about sharing a bed with the girl that he possibly loved. This was about being there for a friend who was going through something he understood.

"I'm an orphan now."

It was a strange thing to say and James didn't know how to reply for a moment. Then he made a strange sound that sounded slightly like a laugh. He felt Lily move and when he looked at her green eyes littered with tears were staring at him.

"There's a few of us now Lily. You, me, Alice and Joe we're all orphans. And I suppose if you were to ask Sirius and Amanda they could well claim to be as well."

"How do you cope James?"

"I'm old enough to take care of myself and although I hate the fact my parents are gone I know I can survive. I've got all I need from them inside me and I keep going."

Lily's head came back down onto James' chest and he wrapped his arms tightly around her. He listened to the soft sound of her breathing. After about ten minutes he thought that she must be asleep. Slowly he attempted to peel her off of him. Just as he was about to slip out of the bed he heard her voice.

"Please will you stay?"

He turned and kneeled next to the bed gently stroking her hair.

"I thought you were asleep."

"Please stay."

"I need to go back to Hogwarts and explain what has happened to Dumbledore. I'll tell him that you are going to stay here until after the funeral and then return to the school. But I'll stay until you're asleep and I promise that I'll be back before you wake up."


	52. Chapter 52

Chapter 52

James appeared just down the path from the gates into Hogwarts. He knew that it was going to be easy for him to get back into the grounds what with it being a Hogsmeade weekend. He strolled up to them and pushed them aside. They opened easily and as he took a step inside he felt the familiar tingle from the last time.

He had no idea what it was Dumbledore had put on the gate to tell students apart from others. If he had been under seventeen he would have claimed it was something that could tell the tracer that allowed the ministry to know if they had done illegal magic.

Whatever it was though James got through. He walked up the grounds through the snow wondering what it would be like to live in a time where death wasn't a norm. He would love to live in a world where he was shocked by what had happened again. But shock of death was something he had lost a long time ago. It seemed to him as if it was something that lingered around people just waiting to claim another one.

He was on what felt like automatic as he walked the path towards the main doors. Then he was inside the building. He knew that it was late. He looked at his watch and knew that the evening dinner was being served. His stomach was empty and part of him knew he needed a meal and yet food was the last thing on his mind.

Turning to his right he went through the doors into the crowded hall. Laughter and happiness floated around the place. It was a surreal feeling to know that there were people happy. Hogwarts had to be one of the few places where that was the case. James didn't stop to scan the Gryffindor table. He didn't know if his friends were having food.

Instead he kept his eyes on the top table and walking between the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw rows made his way up to the top. Eyes moved to him and the chatter seemed to go down slightly in volume. Maybe people were wondering why he wasn't with the Gryffindors, maybe they wanted to know why he was walking with so much purpose towards the top table.

He climbed the two small steps and found himself in front of Dumbledore. The headmaster looked at him and gave a small nod.

"Am I right to assume that it has happened?"

"Around eleven thirty Sir."

"And Miss Evans?"

"Is extremely upset Sir as expected. I've left her at her grandfather's house with him and her sister and brother-in-law."

James watched as the headmaster nodded. At that James spoke again.

"She wishes to stay at the house to aid in the funeral arrangements."

"Of course I will pass the information along to those that need to know."

"I also promised that I would be there when she wakes up Sir."

"Did you?"

James gave a small nod.

"She is in a bad way Sir. She knew that this was coming but I don't think she prepared herself for it to happen so soon."

"Be back in school in time for your first lesson on Monday James and that will be fine."

"Thank you Sir."

James turned away to leave the castle to get back to Lily when he heard Ddraig speak to him.

"Tell her we are thinking of her at this time."

He turned back and looked at his professor.

"I will Professor."

"Let us know when the funeral will be. I for one would like to pay my respects to Dudley. He was a good man."

"Yes Professor."

James didn't know what else to say. He simply turned and took the same path he had up to the table back to the doors. As he entered the Entrance Hall he heard footsteps behind him. He didn't turn though until he heard Branwen's voice.

"James what's happened?"

His friends must have followed him out they were all stood together looking at him. He noticed that it wasn't just the six of them Joe and Frank were stood among them. He had known that it was a Hogsmeade weekend and it seemed they had joined the group.

He didn't know the best way to word it for his friends. They would understand the impact that their family was shrinking ever faster. Would there be comfort in knowing that this time it was down to illness and not murder?

"Lily's father passed away around lunch time."

Branwen gasped while the others reminded stationary. It was Peter that spoke up.

"Tell Lily we all love her and we're here for her when she needs us."

"Thanks I will."

"And that we'll all be there for the funeral."

James nodded towards Peter. Then with a small smile to show his appreciation he turned and headed back out into the grounds to make his way back to Lily.

* * *

Hi everyone. Sorry that it isn't much and that its been a while since I updated. I don't know if I mentioned it before but I'm a student Nurse and I'm on placement at the moment so things are a bit hectic. I hope to have the next chapter up next week though. I was going to post it with this one but the tone is slightly different due to the fact that the next chapter is Joe's birthday so I wanted to keep that seperate. Hope that you are all okay up there and I promise more soon

Kris xx


	53. Chapter 53

Chapter 53

Joe sat in the living room of the flat with the radio turned on at a low buzz. He didn't want to have to listen to the news of disasters in the world today. He knew that a muggle foot and ball game had been attacked by Death Eaters earlier that day but he didn't need to know anymore.

His mind was buzzing with all different feelings as he waited for his brothers to finish getting ready. He had gone to Hogwarts the day before expecting a fun day with Branwen and had ended up sitting waiting for the news that Lily had lost her father.

It was strange when he thought about his friends. Really there was only one person left with a full family unit and that was Remus. Sure Sirius' parents were still together but since the boy never visited them it wasn't the same. It seemed to Joe that as you grow up the people who shaped you disappear.

He usually tried not to think of his parents. He hated the image of his family together and strong if it weren't for the war. If Voldemort had never existed he'd still have both his parents. And today he wanted his parents. He wanted to hear them laugh at the presents that Anton and Kyle had gotten him for his birthday.

It felt strange to think that he was another year older. Now he was nineteen and next year his teenage life would be over with forever. This was a marked birthday for him as well because it was the first one out of Hogwarts. He had been counting down to it for a while.

Because it was a Sunday he had hoped that maybe his friends would have been able to get out of school for a few hours. But after the events of yesterday that didn't seem to be something he wanted to ask them to do. He knew that they should celebrate the good and let the bad pass but to ask them to party with him today felt insensitive to him.

Because tonight he really was going to be partying. Anton had arranged a party for him and he felt sure that there would be a number of Quidditch players there. He also knew that a number of people from the station would be turning up. He also had a sneaky idea that some of the younger Order members would be with them. He had no idea where they were going because his brothers refused to tell him. All he knew was that Frank would be meeting them there.

"You ready then Joey?"

He shot a look at Anton that said everything. He hated it when his brothers called him Joey. They only ever did it when they wanted to wind him up or tease him. He could see the smile on Kyle's face as he stood up the door. With a little nod Joe stood up and wondered what he was letting himself in for.

"Are you really not playing Quidditch anymore?"

"Yep I haven't played since the final game in Hogwarts."

"But you're so good. I really thought you'd go professional."

Joe turned away from the conversation Frank was having with Kathy White. Music bounced from the walls of the club as he walked towards the bar. His brothers had done a good job the place was full, not of people that Joe necessarily knew but everyone was having a great time and that's all that really mattered.

Joe made to walk pass a group of people when an arm swung round and pulled him into their conversation.

"Joe have you met John's new girlfriend?"

"No hello."

He smiled as the blonde blushed. John took her hand in his and leaned towards Joe a little.

"This is Libby."

"Hello Libby I'm Joe."

"Happy birthday."

"Thanks."

He turned to Fabian as John and Gideon spoke cheerfully with Libby.

"Where'd he meet this one?"

The redhead chuckled at this. It was a running joke between them about John and his girlfriends. He'd meet someone he really liked only to find that she was with someone else, stealing from him. Or as his last girlfriend turned out a Death Eater trying to put him under the Imperius curse.

"She works at the hospital as a receptionist?"

"Is she one of them?"

"Doesn't seem smart enough mate. I'm surprised she even knows how to walk in heels!"

Joe gave a little nod of understanding as he made his way towards the bar. A dumb blonde seemed more with Anton's taste than with Johns. But then as long as she wasn't trying to kill the man everyone was entitled to a little fun.

"What will it be son?"

He looked up at the aging bartender and pointed over towards the fire whisky.

"Give me a shot of that."

"And a nettle wine please."

Joe turned and felt his mouth drop a little.

"Bran?"

"Happy birthday Joe."

She leaned in towards him and he wrapped his arms around her. Her kiss was smooth and gentle against his lips. They broke apart after a moment when they heard the bartender make a rather feeble coughing noise.

Joe took the drinks and led the girl towards an empty table. As they sat he turned and looked at her. She was the most beautiful woman in the room that night. He just couldn't believe she was there.

"What's wrong has my makeup run or something?"

He shook his head quickly.

"No. I was just wondering what you're doing here?"

"It's my boyfriend's birthday. There was no way I was going to miss that."

She gave him a brilliant smile as he reached across and took her hand.


	54. Chapter 54

Chapter 54

January faded away and the group of youngsters stood in the grounds of an impressive looking church hoped that it took the bitterness with it. January had been a tough month for everyone. It had started with a funeral and ended with a death. It was strange to think that it was less than a month ago that they had stood in another church for another funeral.

But this one was far different to the other. This was a muggle funeral with a wizarding congregation. The last one had been for a woman murdered by Death Eaters. This one was for a man who had fought against disease. But everyone knew this one was going to be just as tough as the first.

The large black cars pulled up and Lily could already feel the tears stirring in her eyes. She was beginning to wish that she had taken James offer. He had tried to persuade her to allow him to go to the house with her that morning. But she had felt the need for it to be strictly family. The house had been hard enough to bear without her having to explain to her aunt and uncle about James.

That was the first surprising incident that had happened since her father's death. In the last couple of years her Uncle Anthony and Aunt Charlene had been distant to the family. But her uncle had phoned and promised that he would be a coffin bearer on the day. That his brother deserved that much from him.

That had brought up a problem for them that they hadn't considered. They had arranged the funeral and burial. They had found a place for the wake and Petunia was doing the food for the day. But they hadn't thought of carrying the coffin. Pa was too old and feeble to be able to do it.

Of course Vernon had volunteered and they were thankful for that. Then with their Uncle Anthony that was two. But they needed another four. Vernon quickly talked his best friend Jack into helping them with the problem. Lily remembered Jack from the wedding he had been Vernon's best man.

Lily had then sent an owl to Hogwarts. She had spoken to her sister and Pa in depth about this and finally her sister had agreed when they were unable to find another 3 men to help carry the coffin. Lily had contacted Taliesin who had been a great comfort to her father since she had joined the wizarding world. She knew that Taliesin had visited her father on many occasions over the last seven years. Taliesin had instantly agreed to it. She sent one more letter to Hogwarts regarding this. And when she received the reply she was able to tell her family that James and Sirius would take up the remaining positions.

Shaking her head she watched as her door was opened and she climbed out. A hand was offered to her instantly and she wrapped herself in James arms feeling the tears already threatening to fall. He gave her a tight squeeze before releasing her. Lily watched silently as he took up his position behind her Uncle. The six men lifted the coffin as one and Lily watched as they headed into the church.

She was silent as she held her Pa's hand. On his other side Petunia was doing the same. Maybe they were giving him the strength he needed for this or maybe it was the other way round. She was unsure. Lily didn't much care as they walked down the aisle. It was so different to the last time they had been here.

She remembered being at the back of the church watching as her father had been supported by Petunia down the aisle. Now the men in their lives were carrying him down towards the front. They gently lowered the coffin onto the stand waiting for it. Then they turned. Lily didn't watch where the men went. Her eyes stayed on that wooden prison that her father now laid in. James' hand guiding her to a seat didn't even focus her. And it wasn't until they stood to sing Amazing Grace that she regained any sense of where she was.

The pub was filled with noise as people reacquainted themselves with friends they hadn't seen in years. That seemed to be a tradition with funerals. Lily though was sat in a corner with a group of people unknown to most people at the service.

Lily was holding James' hand tightly while she sipped on a glass of wine that in this community she was too young to drink. It was almost laughable. Her friends were all sat with similar drinks of either wine or beer in front of them. They were pretty quiet compared to the others around them.

It was a strange feeling to hear people around them relaxed and almost enjoying themselves. This was too much for Lily. How many funerals had she been forced to attend over the last couple of years? How many more would she have? She knew that her father had died of a disease but there was a war in the wizarding world that was causing death on a daily scale. It seemed that most days you could find someone had died. And she and her friends had seen a lot of it.

She took a sip of wine as she thought long and hard. She hoped that this would be the last funeral she would have to attend in a long while. She was unsure if she was strong enough for another any time soon.

Okay so this chapter is a little weak. I think that there's been so many funerals that I just want to skip them as much as possible.


	55. Chapter 55

Chapter 55

Amanda was curled up on the sofa with a copy of Wuthering Heights. She had wanted to get her head cleared and away from anything wizarding and Lily had very kindly lent her the book. However the more she read the more she felt maybe it wasn't the best choice considering how confused her mind was at the moment.

A book about two horrible characters that have only one good quality, love. Maybe that was too close too home. Cathy was a selfish woman and wasn't Amanda that too? Maybe Amanda wasn't to the same extent but she could see herself in Cathy. A wayward child who caused trouble with a young boy who was as good as her brother. Then a selfish love. The only difference that Amanda could see was that she wasn't strong enough to give up her selfish love and find someone else.

With a soft sigh Amanda turned the page and continued to try and read it. She had been reading the book for two days but today when she wanted to get lost in the pages she just couldn't. She hated not being able to settle down and she knew that the problem was not only her conscience but in part the date.

February was turning out to only be slightly better than January as far as she was concerned. James had finally turned a corner in his grieving for his mother. He was more like his old self to talk to and he had thrown his all back into Quidditch. They had a game in a little over a month and he was determined that they would win this one as well.

But really Amanda felt that the thing that had gotten him to change was Lily. She was still in the painful stage of her grieving. Some nights when she thought everyone was asleep she would cry. She was still a little reserved around people even her friends and James was now being the strong one for her. It was nice to see that he cared so much for her that he was willing to do that.

The portrait opened and Amanda jumped slightly. It was passed eleven and although it was Saturday almost all the house was in bed. Silently she watched as the man stepped inside and ran his hands through his hair. He looked slightly worse for wear and she wondered if maybe the date was weighing heavy on his heart too.

He walked towards the stairs heading up to his dorm room in silence. He obviously hadn't noticed her. She was torn between letting him go to bed or to call to him. The decision was taken from her when she lost her grip on the book and it fell with a bang onto the floor. He spun around and she noticed his grey eyes had tightened and his wand was out.

"You don't honestly expect to be attacked in the common room do you?"

Remus gave a little chuckle.

"Well you never know."

"Come off it. Hogwarts is the safest place in the world. There will never be an attack here. In fact I'm so confident I'll bet you a thousand Galleons."

"I'll remember that."

She gave a little smile as she bent over and picked the book back up. He moved over towards the sofa and dropped onto it.

"I hate February 12th"

She gave a little nod and reached over to take his hand.

"I miss her too."

They both looked at the fire lost in their own thoughts for a moment. Today would be Ginny's eighteenth birthday. Amanda had a feeling that this pain in her chest when she thought about it would always be here on this date. Maybe it was because it was a reminder of her best friend or her death she just didn't know.

"Do you think it's strange that sometimes I forget? I know it's been a while but sometimes I get up in the morning and the first thing I think of is I'm going to see her."

"Not at all. You know sometimes something happens and the first thing to cross my mind is that I have to tell Ginny. Hell I miss her so much. There's so much I need to tell her and I know she could give me advice about the stuff that's nagging me."

Remus gave her a funny look.

"Can't one of the other girls then?"

"Alice does. Over the last year or so I've grown really close to Alice and I tell her everything now like I use to tell Ginny. But sometimes I wish it was Ginny giving me the advice. I mean I love Alice but hers is different to what Ginny would tell me."

"Such as?"

Amanda bit her lip gently. Should she tell Remus this? Was he likely to tell Sirius? In a moment she had made her decision.

"I'm worried about me and Sirius. Alice tells me that I'm just being stupid. But I'm not too sure."

Remus squeezed her hand.

"Why are you worried?"

"Okay I know Sirius loves me now. So that worry has sort of dissolved –"

"You didn't think Sirius loved you."

The laughter that flowed from his mouth caused Amanda to give him a push.

"How would I know if he'd never told me?"

"He's never told us that he loves you but it's so obvious."

He calmed down the laughter and gave her a little wink.

"Sorry Mand. So what is it then?"

"You know about the wedding in July right?"

"Sure we all do. His mother has set the date but you're not getting married."

"Well what if he never wants to marry me? What if the fact his mother wants us to puts him off it forever? What if he doesn't love me enough to want a relationship outside of Hogwarts?"

She didn't realise how scared she was of this until she felt the tears on her cheeks and strong arms holding her.

"Now you're being really silly Amanda. You listen to me Sirius loves you more than anything in the world. And when the time is right he'll get down on one knee and ask you to make an honest man of him. He'll want to spend the rest of his life with you."

"Thank you."

"And you won't be alone forever."

"Neither will you."

"I'm a werewolf whose only girlfriend was murdered by Death Eaters. Nobody will ever want to be with me."

"Then they'll all be fools. Because you are the kindest, gentlest man I've ever met. You're thoughtful and loving and the backbone to our survival. You're the one people turn to when they want comfort. And so what if three days a month you're no fun to be around I'm sure the same can be said for a lot of woman out there."

He chuckled at that.

"I love you Remus. You are one of my best friends in this world. I trust you completely and I promise that you will never be alone because you will always have me and my future family."

"Will I get to be an Uncle?"

"Better than that. You will be godfather to my first child."

"I think Sirius will want James."

"You can have more than one godfather."

Amanda pulled back from her hug with Remus and reached up to wipe away a tear that sat on the end of his nose.

"Thanks Mand."

"No worries Remus. I swear we'll always be in each others lives. We'll always be friends."

He grinned.

"Friends forever."


	56. Chapter 56

Chapter 56

Alice closed her book and stood up. She'd been in the library looking up the date that Venus would move into Aquarius and the significance of that. She was a little upset as she looked around at the students who were only pretending to do their work.

She had always loved Valentine's Day in the past. Her father would always send her a special rose and Frank had picked up on that tradition. Last year her first without her family she had been surprised when Frank had presented her with a single red rose. This year it had been a white one.

And although Frank had sent her a rose she was a little disappointed that he hadn't come to Hogwarts the day before to visit. She understood that as it was Monday he was training and he wouldn't be able to come to see her but he had had yesterday off.

Maybe she wasn't being understanding enough. He had a lot on his plate these days. But she just missed him so much. She was so use to seeing him everyday that this year was so difficult for her. That was why she couldn't wait to finish Hogwarts. That surprised her in some ways because she would have been sure that she would hate to finish here. But when she did she'd get to see him everyday.

It felt so strange to her when she thought back to last Valentine's Day. She loved Frank and had for a long time. She remembered in her fifth year telling him that. Of course she was breaking up with him at the time. She had thought that her love for him would fade with time. And it had been last year that she realised the truth. She loved him more everyday and couldn't imagine not being with him.

She remembered being in the library when he asked her what they were doing. It had been a simple question and she had replied by asking him to take her to Hogsmeade. That had been all it had taken for them to get their relationship back on track. Now she looked at those days when they were apart as though it was a dream. Really maybe they had been back together long before then. But it had been that conversation that had made it clear.

Alice opened the door to the library and stepped out into the corridor. They would be serving food in the Great Hall and she was actually hungry. As she walked through the corridor she tried to imagine her life away from this place. It was such a strange thought. This place was home and she knew every student felt like that. It was one of those things about spending seven years here.

She wondered if she would still see the guys on a daily basis. Or would jobs and real life mean that they would only be able to get together on the weekends. That was a strange thought. She was so use to being with the girls everyday that to be apart would be strange. But then maybe they would get a house together when they left. She knew that the only one that had a place to go was Branwen. Lily could probably go to her Pa's but she and Amanda wouldn't have somewhere to live. Maybe they would get somewhere together.

She couldn't imagine living with Frank yet. Maybe in a few years when they were married that would be the case. She could just see a tidy house filled with little kids running around. Frank would be a fabulous father and she would be the best mother that she could be.

Shaking her head she walked down the marble staircase. She wondered if anyone would be in the hall yet. James and Lily had plans and she was sure that Amanda and Sirius would be off somewhere. But the others should all be there. She hoped so anyway she didn't practically fancy spending the evening alone.

As she entered the room she could see Remus and Peter sat side by side half way down the table. They were lost in a conversation with the person sitting opposite them. As Alice walked closer she was a little shocked. She was almost sure that it was Frank but he had told her he was working until eight that night. He was going through tracking tests with Moody.

"Why aren't you in work?"

"I finished at five today."

"But you told me you were working with Moody until eight."

"I know."

He gave her one of his perfect smiles as he stood up from the table.

"Well it's been nice catching up again boys but I've got a date with the prettiest girl in Hogwarts."

"What if the girl disagrees and wants to have dinner with her friends?"

Alice shot Frank a look that said she was serious. Frank simply picked up a basket and wiggled it a little to keep her attention.

"But I cooked for you."

Her smile widened and she offered him her hand.

"Well a girl can't really say no to that."

They walked out of the hall hand in hand. Alice felt safe to let Frank dictate the way to wherever he was taking her. As they walked up the marble stairs she glanced sideways at him. She really did miss him.

"I love you Frank."

The smile widened on his face.

"I love you more."

She laughed as they entered a classroom to enjoy some time together.


	57. Chapter 57

Chapter 57

"James I don't feel safe."

"I swear you are."

Lily tried not to look at the ground as she tilted the nose of the broom up towards the stars. She hadn't flown since their first year. She didn't like it. It was down to her clumsy streak. Although it had been a long time since she had tripped down the stairs or got her foot caught in the fake step she still had it in her.

Usually it was only when she was tired but being in the air made her more self-conscious about it.

"James I really don't like this."

Within moments a second broom was next to her. She watched as James took both his hands off and held himself there by his legs. Lily had watched him do this thousands of times but it still awed her that he was so secure on the thing that he felt safe enough to do that.

"I promise you that nothing will happen. I've got you."

His hands came around her waist and she felt the way he shifted her body. She slammed her eyes shut and clung tighter to the broom. Within seconds her hands were the only thing on that broom.

"It's okay Lily you can let go."

Opening her eyes she saw that one of his hands held the one she had been on. Quickly she transferred her hands to the new one and was amazed by the way that James directed them towards the stands.

Branwen was still in the stands with Joe and James tossed her the broom back. She grinned at Lily but she couldn't relax her face enough to smile.

The reason that Joe was in the stands was the same one Lily had been. Monday night was Quidditch practice for the Gryffindors and just because it was Valentine's Day didn't change that. Joe had come up to see Branwen and had asked Lily to join him in the stands for practice. They had laughed and joked while they watched the team practice.

At seven James had called it a night and Branwen had gone to sit in the stands with Joe while James had pulled Lily into the air. Her friend had been kind enough to lend her the broom. But after ten minutes Lily had had enough.

"Have you got your eyes open?"

"Yes."

"Do you really hate flying that much?"

"Yes. But it's not because I'm afraid of heights or anything like that. It's just that I'm clumsy."

"Not anymore."

"I'm better at disguising it than I use to be."

James laughed and Lily couldn't help but smile.

"So you're scared you'll fall off."

"Basically."

James' hands tightened around her.

"I'd never let that happen. And if by some freak chance it did I would dive so quickly that I'd swipe you up before you got far."

"Oh I know you would."

"Really you trust me that much."

"You wouldn't let anything happen to me. Just like you wouldn't let anything happen to any of the players. I've watched you fly for seven years and you all do the same thing. If someone is in danger you forget the game and go to their aid. And since I'm your girlfriend and none of them are I suspect you'd be even quicker to help me."

He chuckled as he leaned to the right and the broom turned. Lily had to admit that flying was a far more pleasurable experience knowing that James was holding her tightly.

"Do you want a bit of fun?"

"That depends."

"Lean forward."

Lily didn't have much of a choice. James' body was pressed against hers and the broom took a sharp dive. A yelp escaped Lily's lips as they headed towards the ground. They were going so fast that she was sure they wouldn't be able to pull up in time. She screamed just as James pulled back and they started to climb again.

She could hear laughter from the stands but she was too scared to take her hand off and give them a sign.

"You told me you trusted me."

"But there's more weight on the broom than your use to. I thought you'd miss judge the pull up."

"Never."

He directed them over to the opposite stand that Branwen and Joe were in. He hovered the broom so that Lily could climb off and then he did the same. He dropped onto the stand and pulled Lily onto his lap.

"That was fun."

She gave a little snort as he swiped a piece of hair behind her ear.

"How about we do something you like now."

She grinned as she pointed up at the stars.

"Let's just sit here and talk for a while."

He wrapped his arms around her and they sat there looking at the stars and talking nonsense.


	58. Chapter 58

Chapter 58

Peter and Remus were sat at a table in the common room doing their Transfiguration homework. Around them were love struck teenagers giggling over cards they had had and trying to guess which of their peers had sent it to them.

The noise was driving Remus crazy. It had felt like a particularly long day to him. He was just thankful that his friends weren't being all lovely dovey and silly about the day. He knew that he and Peter were they only single ones. But the others weren't all over each other in silly ways.

Maybe they had been together so long that they didn't feel the need to be like that unlike some of their younger classmates. Remus was shocked from thought when Peter closed his book.

"I can't take much more of this."

"Homework of students?"

"Students."

Remus nodded.

"They're getting on my nerves too."

"Half of them won't be talking in a week or so and the relationships will be over. I've never understood the need to be with someone on Valentine's Day."

"Of course you haven't Pete. After all you're the one who broke up with Branwen what was it three years ago?"

He did have the grace to look embarrassed over his actions.

"Okay so I messed up the timing. I shouldn't have ended things on Valentine's Day. But come on I was young and stupid. I mean we were fourth years I didn't know any better."

Remus smiled almost to himself.

"Remember you ended up with a rat tail after that?"

"Yep Branwen brought a bit of Wormtail out in me as punishment."

They both laughed thinking about that. Peter was the first to speak up.

"It feels like another lifetime doesn't it."

Remus nodded.

"Sure does."

They were quiet for a while. Remus looked at the students in the room. It did feel like a lifetime ago that he was having fun like that with someone he loved so much. A frown crept to his face and he spoke without realising.

"I'm scared that I'll never love someone like that again."

"At least you've been in love."

He looked over at Peter and shook his head.

"Sorry mate. I didn't mean –"

"It's no problem. And you know what they say. It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

"You'll fall in love one day Pete. You'll meet a girl and before you know it you'll be in love."

"And you'll be in love again one day Remus. It will happen."

The two sat in silence for a moment. Then Peter opened his text book again and they carried on with their homework as if never having spoken.


	59. Chapter 59

Chapter 59

Sirius was sat at a table by himself. He was completely lost in thought as he watched Amanda curled up on the armchair reading a book. He couldn't help but wonder what was going through her mind. Remus had spoken to him yesterday about a conversation he had had with the girl and Sirius was completely annoyed by what he had heard.

He had spent the evening before trying to keep his temper. He knew that it was a subject he would have to broach with his girlfriend but he knew that he had to be in the right frame of mind. He didn't want to yell at her. He didn't want to upset her but they needed to clear some things up.

During Quidditch practice that evening he had worked out most of his tension and he felt relaxed enough to talk about it now. But with all the happy couples around them it felt a little wrong to maybe do it.

The girl turned a page and he saw the frown on her face. It was that that made him stand up. He walked towards her and took the book from her hand.

"Hey I was reading that."

"We need to talk."

A crease appeared between her eyebrows at that. But she looked like she wouldn't kick up a fuss.

"My dorm room."

He didn't wait to see how she would react he turned around and walked up the stairs. He left the door open as he sat on his bed. He didn't have to wait long before she was in the doorway. She didn't move to come into the room though.

"Are we fighting?"

Sirius shook his head.

"No."

"Then what's with the mood."

"Close the door and I'll tell you."

She looked reluctant but she did as he asked. She stayed with her back against the door though and he sighed at that.

"You and Remus had a nice conversation Saturday night then."

He saw her shoulders drop and slowly she moved over towards him.

"Sorry."

"Why didn't you talk to me about it?"

"I just couldn't."

"Why not? We've been best friends for years Amanda. You should be able to tell me anything."

"You're my boyfriend. That makes it more complicated."

"I'm still your best friend! The fact I'm your boyfriend should make it that much easier to tell me."

"What do you want me to say Sirius?"

"The truth. Tell me what's on your mind."

"I'm scared okay. Is that what you want to hear?"

"Why though."

Sirius watched as her face showed several different emotions. Then finally a look of defeat stuck on her face she looked into his eyes.

"I'm scared that we don't have a future together."

He shook his head slowly.

"What would make you think that?"

"Because you never do what your family wants."

He felt his face knot and he patted the bed next to him. She didn't move though as a single tear slipped from her eye.

"I don't understand Amanda."

"I'm the one that they chose for you. That means that this relationship is the one your parents wanted for you. And I don't think you've fully appreciated that yet. But I think when we leave it will hit you. And then you'll decide that it doesn't matter if you love me or not. You won't want to be with me because it's what they want."

He stood up quickly and pulled her against his chest. He clung to her as tightly as he could without hurting her.

"I think you're wrong about something Mand. My parents wanted me to marry Amanda Dixon. The girl that does what she's told and is respectful to her family. But she doesn't exist. I love a girl who is a fighter, who doesn't care what other people think of her. I love you because your Mandy not because your a Dixon. And I really don't care if my family thinks that on this occasion I'm following their instructions. Because the truth is that I'm too selfish to give you up."

There was a muffled sound but he couldn't make it out.

"Say that again."

"You'll never marry me though will you?"

"Is that a proposal?"

There was no reply to this. He leaned down and rested his cheek on the top of her head and spoke as softly as he could.

"Honestly I want to be with you Amanda. I love you more than I can ever explain. When I thought at Christmas … I just couldn't … I've never been that scared. The idea that I wouldn't be with you was too much for me."

He gulped and closed his eyes for a moment.

"I can imagine us being married. And since Christmas it's something that I have seriously considered. I've got this image in my head of you and me living together in a big house with some children running around and Amanda Dixon doesn't exist anymore. Instead you're Amanda Black and that excites me."

"Really?"

Her voice was small and soft. He smiled as he rubbed her back gently.

"Sure. But you need to understand something. You are right about the family situation. And that is why I've been thinking so hard. I don't want them to have any say over us. And the thing is I know that one of your arguments for not getting married when they want us to is that I haven't asked you. So I'm not going to."

"Are you going to make me do it?"

He laughed hard at this and kissed the top of her head.

"If you want to you can. But please wait until after July first. That's my plan anyway."

She pulled away from him and looked up closely.

"Right now I don't care if we get married or not. I just want to know that we do have a future."

"Oh we have a very long future ahead of us."

Amanda leaned up towards him and gently took his lips. His arms wrapped around her as they deepened the kiss. Somehow without him realising it they were on the bed. Sirius wrapped his arms around the girl as her hands went up to his hair.

They stayed like that for a while then her fingers were brushing against his cheek. They moved slightly and her top rose a little. Very slowly he traced a line up her back. He could feel her twitching slightly as if his touch tickled her. Before realising his fingers brushed against a soft material that he knew to be her bra. This was new territory for him. They had never done anything close to his before.

Sirius quickly made a decision and ran his hand over the material. He found the part he wanted and tried to pry it apart. It was harder than he thought. Laughter tickled his lips as finally the clasp opened to him. He continued to run his hand up and down her back touching only skin.

Amanda's hand which had gone back to his hair brushed down the fabric of his top and slipped beneath it. She tickled his side gently with the tips of her fingers as their kiss became more violent.

Sirius' breathing was becoming shaper and he could tell that Amanda's was too. Her fingers traced patterns on his back as his top rose a little higher. Cold air brushed against his skin yet it didn't affect him half as much as the heat from her fingers. Amanda shifted slightly and he somehow ended up straddling her. Their lips broke apart briefly and Sirius shifted more. His fingers that had been resting on her back brushed over her stomach gently.

The pair smiled gently at each other before Sirius lowered his lips to hers once more. Her hands were gripping his shoulders under his shirt now and his fingers brushed further up her body. Her loose bra made it simple to slip his fingers under the material. As his fingers began to brush against her breasts a squeal disrupted them.

Sirius sat up quickly and looked behind him. Peter had his back to them looking really uncomfortable.

"Sorry I didn't mean –"

"This is turning into a habit for you Pete."

There was a teasing sound to Amanda's voice as she sat up. Sirius shifted so he wasn't on her lap and watched as she slid her hands under her top and re-clipped her bra.

"I'll just head back to the common room. I'm really sorry I didn't know you were up here."

He reached for the door but Amanda was already stood up.

"No worry Pete. I really should head to my own dorm room."

She kissed Sirius' lips lightly then walked out of the room. He saw her give Peter a wink and felt really confused. The boy turned to look at Sirius and he noticed his face was red.

"Pete what did she mean that it's a habit?"

"The night you sent Snape down the tunnel I went looking for James. And well I found them in a very similar situation."

Sirius' mouth opened a little but Peter climbed into his bed and pulled the curtains behind him. Sirius didn't know who was more embarrassed him or Peter.


	60. Chapter 60

Chapter 60

February was drawing close to its end and Sirius was still troubled. It had been over a week since the night Peter had walked in on him and Amanda and his confusion was still there. Amanda had made a simple remark regarding Peter and it had brought Sirius' world crashing down.

He understood that Amanda came with baggage. She wasn't as whole as other girls in the school. For years her problem had been a secret shared between only a handful of people but since last January the world at large knew. They understood how horrid a man her father truly was and what he had done to her.

Sirius accepted this fact easily. He knew that it was an act of violence and not what Amanda had wanted. It had never crossed his mind that maybe on another occasion she had consented to such a thing.

Since Valentine's Day Sirius had been rethinking over the days surrounding his worse prank ever. He hated himself beyond words for the way he had acted at the time. He remembered pretending that it was a slip of the tongue with Snape. He had watched the look on the Slytherins face as the news struck him.

Then on the night he had stood in a window and watched. Peter had seen and tried to convince him to stop Snape. But that had failed and Sirius had remained in that window watching as his friend had run away. He had been stood there feeling smug and not really thinking about what would happen. Then he had seen James.

His friend had dived under the tree and followed Snape into the depths. His stomach had knotted with guilt in that moment and he had started to run. He didn't stop when Peeves threw something he slammed through the doors and out into the grounds.

He hadn't gotten any further. Dumbledore had been coming through the doors at the same time. The commanding voice had stopped him in his tracks. He had yelled about James but when he was ordered to the Heads office he went without comment.

It had felt like a lifetime of waiting that night. Peter had been there when he entered. His friend wouldn't look at him and just stood next to Fawkes while Sirius stared out the window seeing nothing. Dumbledore had been more than fair with him and he had learnt an important lesson.

But his actions had had a far longer effect on some people. It had been his actions that had led to James and Amanda splitting up. She had only heard part of the story and had suspected James to have had a hand in trying to kill her cousin. It had been a nasty break-up.

But what he hadn't known was that on the same night Amanda had been on James' bed. They had been all over each other until Peter walked in. Since that information had come to him his mind was boggled. Had that night been a first for them? Had they been in a situation like that before? Had they been interrupted before they could go all the way or had they done so before that night?

Sirius knew that Amanda had dated a few guys and he wasn't stupid enough to think that she hadn't kissed the boys. But he hadn't thought of anything else. Hell he'd dated other girls and handholding and kissing was the furthest he'd ever gone.

He had tried to ignore this nagging feeling but it was getting stronger. He knew he couldn't change the past but he needed to know the truth. But whenever he opened his mouth to ask Amanda the words never came out. He didn't want to see the look in her eyes when she realised what it was he was asking.

That had left him with only one other option. He had waited and waited to find the right time to ask. But there never seemed to be a right time. So he had decided that Quidditch practice would be as good a time as any. He knew it sounded strange but with only one other guy on the team the changing rooms would be a safe place where no-one would disrupt them.

He watched as Randell left the room then taking a sigh dropped onto a bench and started to dry his hair.

"James can I ask you something?"

His friend turned and put his glasses on his nose.

"What's up?"

"It's a little personal but I need to know."

"Sirius?"

"Did you have sex with Amanda?"

James looked a little shocked at this but spoke up instantly.

"No have you?"

Relief flooded through Sirius' body at this small little statement.

"Nope."

He couldn't help but smile. James though was stood perfectly still as if completely at a loss. Sirius watched his friend and wondered something else.

"What about Lily?"

"No Lily and I haven't. Why you haven't with her have you?"

"Why would Lily and I have done anything?"

James made a face and dropped onto another bench.

"Sorry you just caught me off guard is all."

The two went silent as Sirius pulled on his socks. It was a few minutes before James spoke again.

"Why'd you want to know anyway?"

"Pete said something and it got me wondering."

"What he say?"

"That he walked in on you and Amanda once. Apparently the pair of you were on the bed."

"She's been on your bed a hell of a lot more times than she's ever been on mine."

"That's true."

Sirius stood up and picked up his broom. As he turned to leave he heard James laugh. He turned and looked at his friend who was creased up.

"Were you jealous?"

"What? No of course not."

"You haven't been jealous of me since fifth year Sirius. I can't believe that the fact that Amanda and I once dated still makes you jealous."

"It doesn't James."

Sirius made a sigh and moved over to where James was sitting.

"This stays between you and me okay."

"Promise."

"You know I've never been this serious about a girl before and I just got sort of panicked that maybe there was a chance that she had."

"Even if she had Sirius you two are meant for each other. So there's no reason to be jealous."

"You wait James. One day something will be said by Lily or about her and you remember this conversation. You'll get it then."

Sirius turned and walked out of the room feeling more confident and happier than he had in weeks.

* * *

Hello everyone. Hope that you've all had a nice holiday. Just wanted to let you all know that there are officially 17 chapters left to year 7. But don't fear I have started writing the after hogwarts chapter. I have 8 chapters written for that in the right order and another 7 that are not in order but are really big events that I've had written for a long time that I'm going to fit in (although 1 or 2 need to be altered, I've got Sirius living in the wrong place)

But the big news is that I want to say sorry for how irregular the posting is of late. My uni year is a bit different to most people's its March-March not a September start. And I don't get proper holidays like most courses I get a week off here and there. But good news I'm off for ALL of February. But until then the post is going to be even more irregular because I'm going to be on placement in a busy hospital and not sure when I'll find the time to come on here. But I promise that the 7th year will be all up by the end of Feb if not before.

Everybody have a nice New Year and I might be able to get another post up before then if we're lucky.

Kris xx


	61. Chapter 61

Chapter 61

Frank was exhausted. It had been a very long week of training for him. Moody seemed to be rather annoyed about something. But Frank had been smart enough not to ask why. The truth had come to light earlier that afternoon when news reached the office that a man being trialled as a Death Eater had been released without charge.

He had thought prior to that that the Death Eaters would be charge and sent to Azkaban. There was no doubt in any Auror's mind that this man was a Death Eater. He had been captured on the scene of muggle torturing. Yet he had gotten away.

Frank stepped out of the fireplace at home. He wanted so badly to go to bed and get some sleep. He hadn't slept well the past few nights. He figured it had something to do with a home he had visited on Tuesday. He had been out with a senior Auror named Seybold when they had gone to the home of someone who had accused a work member as a Death Eater.

There had been a lot of evidence to support the claim and the man had spent a lot of time researching before he made the claim. So they had arrived at the house only to find the dark mark floating above the roof.

Frank's stomach had dropped instantly. He hadn't been involved in much activity as he was still in his first year but his personal experiences had given him enough to know something bad would happen. They had walked inside to find the man blown up and in pieces. His wife lay on the floor next to him and dangling over the banister on the stairs was a girl of around five.

Frank had been shaking as he had left the scene hours later. It wasn't the worse thing he had seen but this was his first experience with someone who couldn't fight back. He had seen teenagers and adults killed by Death Eaters but a child seemed even worse to him.

Yes that face had been haunting his dreams. Yet he knew tonight would bring no rest. But it would be for another reason. March had arrived and the eleventh brought celebrations in the Longbottom house. Frank was nineteen today. He thought it strange that he only had one more year as a teenager. Then he'd be in his twenties and an adult.

But tonight was party night. He knew that you had to celebrate the good through the bad. So he would go to the pub where Joe was throwing him the party and he would have a drink and smile and try to enjoy himself. He knew that selected members of the Order would be there as well, the younger ones. And as well as that his family would be there.

But there would be people missing. His friends still stuck in Hogwarts wouldn't be allowed out for this. He knew that Branwen had managed to get out for Joe's but the others hadn't been allowed. So maybe Alice would show up. But she hadn't said so in her last letter which had arrived that morning with a birthday card and present.

She was so sweet and Frank couldn't imagine having any other woman in his life. He knew that he was lucky that he had found her so young. Most people date around before they find the one but she was the only one to have ever been in his life. And that felt extra special to him.

The large grandfather clock struck the half hour mark and he knew he was late. The party would start at seven but he hadn't been able to get away earlier. He only had to change then he could leave. He was a little surprised that his mother and Victor weren't in the house waiting for him.

Then something caught his attention. He wondered how good an Auror he would be if it had taken him so long to notice this. The table was made up for two people. Candles were lit giving a romantic mood. Great his mother was planning a special evening since he wouldn't be here.

"Mum you home?"

He draped his cloak on the coat stand and turned in time to see the blonde head poke around the doorframe.

"She's gone to the pub to apologise to everyone for your absence. She said that she and Victor would stay there for a few hours and have drinks."

"Alice?"

"Sit at the table Frank."

His mouth had dropped but he did as he was told. He watched as the girl came in with a plate in her hand.

"I figured that since on our last two dates you've made food for me I'd return the favour."

She put the plate on the table and turned to look at him. With a smile on her face she lowered her lips to his.

"Happy Birthday Frank. I love you."

"I love you more."

His arms wrapped around her as the food was forgotten for the time being.


	62. Chapter 62

Chapter 62

Peter stood in the stands and screamed as the players emerged from the changing room. He had never been a secure flyer and his interest in Quidditch was as a spectator. He knew that whilst the team struggled through practices to get to the right level for a game he only had to turn up to enjoy it.

Next to him Remus had his arm around Lily who was looking noticeably worried. Peter grinned as Alice screamed from the girls other side. Lily had never been the girlfriend of a player before. This was going to be a new experience. They were all use to Alice stood there worried about Frank but the last game she had jumped and enjoyed herself as much as Peter.

"And the game has started. Potter has the ball for Gryffindor he passes the Hufflepuffs captain and longest serving chaser Cast."

Peter tended to ignore the commentary. He could see well enough what was happening. James had passed Cast and dodged to the right as Hughes hit a bludger at him. He'd gotten all the way to the hoops and aimed to the left. Head moved to block but James dropped the ball to Jackie below and she got it through the right hoop.

Peter screamed and jumped with excitement as Gryffindor got the first points of the game.

* * *

Sirius hovered in front of the posts watching as Brown passed Amanda whilst dodging the Bludger from Kat. It hit Amanda in the stomach and she doubled over and rolled the broom. The whistle didn't sound and Sirius kept his eyes on Brown.

The boy got passed Jackie and took aim. Branwen's bludger caught his shoulder just after he had released the Quaffle. Sirius caught it easily and looked back out. James was two feet behind Brown. With a careful aim he tossed the ball at him. He watched as he released his grip on the broom and caught it. Twisting his body in a way only Quidditch players could his broom changed direction and Gryffindor were charging back down the field.

* * *

Lily screamed and buried her head back into Remus' shoulder. Quidditch seemed a lot scarier when your boyfriend was the one playing. Suddenly the way Alice had acted all those years made sense to her. How Sirius and Amanda could be up there together was beyond her.

She had watched twenty minutes earlier when Amanda had taken a bludger to the stomach and Sirius hadn't reacted. He'd just saved the Quaffle and passed the ball back to James. The whistle had sounded after that and Amanda had landed on the ground. The rest of the team remained in the air focused.

Lily had watched though as the healer had come over and examined her friend. She had said something which Amanda must have ignored because as her friend was back in the air the matron was yelling up at her looking angry.

The game had continued with James scoring another goal. In the intervening minutes Gryffindor had scored twice since and Hufflepuff once. But for Lily forty minutes of play seemed like three hours. Her stomach was knotted and she felt sick. When James had taken both hands off his broom and rolled upside down to escape a bludger to the face she had screamed in horror. Her eyes had slammed shut and when they were open again Amanda was racing down the pitch with the ball.

She had always enjoyed watching games before but today she really couldn't wait for it to be over.

* * *

The whistle sounded again and James swore. Every time they were getting into a play this happened. He was beginning to think that Prewett wanted Hufflepuff to win the game. He watched as the ref called Beetle the Hufflepuff beater towards him.

As they argued over the fact that Beetle had thrown his bat at Jackie (and missed) he called Amanda and Jackie over to him.

"You okay Jackie?"

"Yeah. Any chance of Randell catching the Snitch soon. I think they're getting a bit annoyed about something."

The Hufflepuff team had all pilled around Prewett and Beetle. James just shrugged and looked around. Randell was skimming the area it was clear to tell that he was searching hard. James wondered if he was feeling more confident yet. He was still a new player and didn't feel a hundred percent certain yet unlike the rest of the team.

Finally Prewett motioned that the game was fit to continue. James gave the nod and the three of them flew to their positions to continue with the game.

* * *

The game being played looked set to be a long one. Remus had watched many games since coming to Hogwarts and there seemed to be a pattern forming. If a game reached two hours it was likely to last between four or five hours in total.

So far they had played for one hour and fifty minutes. He watched as Tomlinson the Hufflepuff seeker dived towards the earth. His path would take him directly into James. It seemed that Lily could see that too. She made a squealing noise and clung onto his arm.

He kept his eyes on the dive. At the last moment James back passed the ball to Amanda who was a foot higher as he made a quick turn. Tomlinson then pulled up. It was obviously a move meant to cause the opposing chaser to lose the ball. Yet Amanda simply quickened her flight and took aim…

* * *

The ball flew from Amanda's hand as the whistle sounded.

"For Merlin's sake!"

She turned ready to scream at Prewett for doing this to her again. This game was turning out to be one of her worse ever. She had only managed to score two goals in nearly two hours. Her stomach was killing her from the bludger she had taken earlier and she'd had seven goals disallowed.

She couldn't think of what the problem was this time. She'd been had four times for haversacking which had been unintentional. She had meant to let go of the Quaffle before it went through the hoop. Then one of the attempts had gone through just after the whistle had sounded to penalise Soft for skinning with Jackie.

Jackie had been lucky in that case that Soft hadn't collided too powerfully with her. In fact the attempt had been so pitiful the Hufflepuff had been the one to fall off the broom. He had obviously been trying to stop Jackie from scoring. He just hadn't noticed that Amanda had been the one with the ball. Honestly Prewett could have looked the other way and allowed Amanda's goal to count. Instead Jackie had had a penalty and scored.

Then Hughes had been had for bumphing with another one of her attempts. Really the ball had sailed cleaning through the left hoop as he had hit the Bludger towards the Gryffindor stands. Game had been stopped just as the ball was entering the hoop and so it was disallowed. When she was awarded the penalty though Head had easily saved it.

Then the final goal that had been disallowed had been because Brown had blagged her. Sure the fact that he had been pulling the end of her broom had slowed her down. Plus she had swung off course and ended up hanging from her broom by one leg until James had helped push her back on. But when she had released the ball it had found its way through the middle goal. She had argued that she would take the goal instead of a penalty. She had lost and Head had caught yet another ball from her.

Honestly she was getting really annoyed now. She knew that she hadn't haversacked this one and if one of the Hufflepuffs had fouled again as she was about to score she would break that players legs. It wasn't fair Tomlinson had deliberately just attempted a notorious foul of blatching by trying to attempt to collide with James and hadn't been called up. And now she was scoring it happened.

With a strong word on the tip of her tongue she turned ready to argue once more with Prewett.

* * *

Alice screamed as the whistle sounded. She watched as Randell pulled up with the small gold ball in his hand. She had been watching as Amanda took aim on the goals when the movement of the seeker caught her attention.

She stamped her feet and clapped in time with Peter as the game ended. Gryffindor had won another Quidditch match. Sure she knew that Frank would probably have found it sooner, that his dive would have been neater. But she really didn't care. She had enjoyed the game and they had won.

Alice threw her arms around Lily (who was still clinging to Remus) and cheered with the crowd around her. Another game down one more win and the Cup would be theirs. And even better tonight there would be a party. As the team landed Alice wondered just how much fun they would have that night.

* * *

Sorry its been so long since I've updated placement was manic. But I've finished my 1st year and I'm hoping that I'll be able to post more next week before I start back up.

Kris xx


	63. Chapter 63

Chapter 63

James was sat in the library with a pile of books surrounding him. He was beginning to question his actions on leaving his Transfiguration essay so late. He had been given it two weeks earlier and of course he had left it until the day before to do. Why had that seemed such a good idea?

He realised that in actual fact it had never seemed like a smart idea but he had gotten distracted. It was something that was easy for him. A prank to pull, the full moon near or as had been the case this time a Quidditch game to prepare for.

Gryffindor had beaten the Hufflepuff team three days earlier and James was still in high spirits from that. He loved it when he got to go up in the air and chase that Quaffle. For him it was when he felt at his lightest and free. Plus it had been an important game. They had needed to win to stay in with a shot of winning the Cup. And he really wanted that Cup this year. Not only was it his final chance but he was Captain. It was a way to go out.

But he hadn't known that spending all his time preparing over the last two weeks had put pressure on his academic work. He had been the only member of the team not to have finished this piece of work (and there were another three who had to do it). But he argued that unlike them he had needed to plan the game, he had needed to ensure that all the players had known what they were doing. And he also had prefect duties!

Okay so maybe he had had the time. Maybe his time management skills just weren't that good. Or maybe this was a little last rebellion for him. He was expected to be mature now and responsible. He had to set a good example for all the other students. A laugh started in his throat but he didn't let it surface as he thought of that. When had he ever set a good example?

Admittedly he had only received two detentions this year but that still took his grand total up to two thousand five hundred and seventy four. He was extremely proud of that total which he knew he shouldn't be. But he and Sirius had striven since their first years to outdo each other with detention. It had become a competition. A competition that Sirius was now winning. His friend had two thousand six hundred and seventeen thanks to his twenty three dentitions this year.

James shook his head. This was his own fault. He turned the page and studied the diagram of a rather complex looking transformation. A little sigh slipped through his lips as he glanced the window out of the corner of his eye. It was a glorious day, the sun was bright and there were no clouds or wind. It was perfect for a bit of fun.

That's what Sirius had intended for him. A fun day. His classes had finished at three and his friend had planned for them to spend an afternoon in the air forgetting about all the troubles that they had faced so far this year. It made James wish that he had done this work.

But maybe work was a good distraction. Today hadn't been the easiest of days for him. After Transfiguration yesterday and a lecture about how close the NEWTS were Lily had drawn up a revision schedule. He would be going over Charms later tonight. That had scared him into how close his time here was nearly over.

Plus on top of that today had been a date he wasn't looking forward to since Christmas. He knew that time moved on that life didn't stop. It was a lesson he had learnt three years earlier and something he knew would always continue. Sometimes he imagined what would happen if tomorrow he never woke up. He liked to think that the world would stop but he knew that life would still go on. That his friends would have to carry on living. And that was something he'd been attempting to do since Christmas.

Christmas was something that still haunted him and he wondered if it would ever go away. In his worst nightmares he would see it again. Sometimes his mother would be replaced by Lily and he'd wake up in a panic trying to remember that it wasn't true.

He'd given up trying to work out what he could have done differently to save his mother. He knew that nothing could change what had happened. Death was a natural occurrence that couldn't be stopped. Everyone hoped that they would be old when it was their time that it would be painless surrounded by the people they loved.

He shook his head to clear it. Maybe this was a sign that he was maturing. After all he wasn't a child anymore. Today he was eighteen and he was even more a man now than before. He was independent (though not by choice). He had a future ahead of him that was full of promise. If only he could finish this damn essay.

With another two feet to go he dug deep. If he could finish this before dinner maybe he could convince Lily that revision would keep another night and try to enjoy his last birthday in this place.

* * *

I'm sorry its been a while my laptop died and then the main computer went two days later. It's been a nightmare couple of weeks for trying to get work done without a computer. But I hope that I can make it up by posting another chapter today. So 2 for the price of 1! And the next one is a long chapter (and much better than this filler one if I say so myself)


	64. Chapter 64

Chapter 64

"And Greg aims for the left hoop as Griffith's dives he turns and yes Greg scores for the Arrows!"

Joe's voice was drowned out by the fans as they cheered for their Captain. Next to him Pippa recited some statistics to show how well Greg was doing this season. Joe watched as Greg slapped hands with Anton in celebration before heading back down the field ready to snatch the ball back from the Bats.

"Cornwell has the ball for the Bats and she takes off towards the opposite end..."

Something in the stands caught Joe's eye and his words died in this mouth. His attention completely left the game as he saw with horror what was about to happen. He knew that his voice was tuned not only to the radio but into the stands. Everyone could hear him.

"DEATH EATERS IN THE WEST STANDS!"

* * *

The Gryffindor common room was abuzz with laughter. Saturdays were always like this of late. The weather was changing as March was coming to its end and the temperature was starting to increase. People were in good spirits as they lounged around with games or books. Some had left the room and headed outside to enjoy the sun but most were stretched out on the floor or in chairs listening to the radio.

Quidditch was a major part of wizarding life. It was the only sport that really mattered to most people. And today's match was a biggie. The Arrows were playing the Bats and whoever won would top the league table. The room was divided by those in blue calling for the Arrows and the blacks who were supporting the Bats.

Branwen like her friends had chosen blue and cheered extra loudly whenever Joe or Pippa mentioned that Anton had the ball. It felt relaxed in the common room and they were joking at certain phrases that were brought up.

When Joe had called Anton the pounding swinger they had all sniggered. It was a dig at Anton's dancing moves whilst drunk and a nickname that his friends had been using for years. Branwen also knew that this was Joe's way of saying hello to them all. It was a little code that Anton had agreed he could use for this game.

"_And Greg aims for the left hoop as Griffith's dives he turns and yes Greg scores for the Arrows!"_

Branwen jumped to her feet with a scream and high-fived James. Amanda was calling the move classic as Sirius laughed yelling rooky mistake at Griffiths. Remus and Peter were grinning as Lily gave a small clap. Around them the other Arrows supporters were making similar sounds as the Bats fans groaned.

"_Cornwell has the ball for the Bats and she takes off towards the opposite end..."_

Joe's voice came to an abrupt end and suddenly the noise in the common room did as well. For the last six years they had all listened to Joe's commentary within Hogwarts and they knew that when he didn't finish his sentence something had happened. Usually it was a foul that he couldn't bring himself to mention for a moment. Or someone was falling off their broom.

The room held its breath as one waiting to discover what had happened and to which player. Then Joe's voice was louder than before, it was commanding with an edge of panic to it.

"_DEATH EATERS IN THE WEST STANDS!"_

Every sound in the common room came to an end as they realised something terrible was about to happen.

* * *

"DEATH EATERS IN THE WEST STANDS!"

Frank was in the West stand sat with Kyle, Gideon, Fabian and John. The five men had become very close over the last few months and had come to support their friend in what was being dubbed the biggest game of the season.

Frank heard the screams of panic around him. People were reacting to Joe's words. Nobody seemed to think it a hoax and as people pushed Frank climbed on his seat. Two rows down and about twelve seats over were a group of six Death Eaters.

Raising his wand he fired a stunner over the heads of those leaving. More screams erupted as his spell went over their heads. It connected with his target. As the woman fell he could see the others firing spells at random into the crowd. He didn't wait for back-up. He didn't wait to see if his friends would follow.

Frank jumped from his seat and ran towards the group. He had a job to do.

* * *

Joe knew that the door to the commentary box was locked. It was done for safety measures after a crazed fan burst in once on Pippa and flung himself at her. He had never really considered it before because it wasn't important. But that door wouldn't stay locked. With the right spell anyone could open it.

Inside the room he was stood, his chair laying sideways on the floor behind him. Pippa was crouched under the desk and he could hear her screams of terror as she hid there with Bertie the expert on the system.

But Joe refused to hide. He needed to stay alert. He knew that if he got to the stands he could fight the Death Eaters. He'd faced them before in the past and thanks to his involvement in the Order had been undercover amongst them a few times.

But today he wasn't going to fight. Today he had a more important job. He had a clear view on the stadium. He could see people panicking and pushing away from the West Wing. Yells of fright echoed throughout the stadium. But what the others couldn't see was that the West Wing wasn't the only one containing Death Eaters.

"FIFTH ROW FROM THE TOP IN THE EAST STANDS, MIDDLE OF THE ROWS. THERE ARE FOUR DEATH EATERS ABOUT TO ATTACK. ON THE NORTH STAND HALF WAY DOWN ON THE LEFT OF THE STAIRS THREE DEATH EATERS. AND THE SOUTH STANDS THERE'S I THINK I CAN SEE SEVEN IN THE VERY FRONT ROW. THEY'RE AIMING AT THE PLAYERS."

Joe watched as on the West stand a group of fans ploughed into the Death Eaters. A smile came to his lips as he recognised the group.

"A GROUP OF SPECATORS IN THE WEST WING ARE FIGHTING BACK. THEY'VE TAKEN ON THE DEATH EATERS. I URGE THOSE OF YOU IN THE OTHER STANDS WITH FIGHTING SKILLS DO THE SAME. COME ON THERE HAVE TO BE SOME AURORS HERE. DON'T TELL ME FRANK IS THE ONLY ONE..."

* * *

Anton could feel the tension as around him cries went up. It was the strangest sensation in the world to be on a broom whilst the world around you crumbled into chaos. His fellow professionals were diving down towards the ground to get out of the way.

His brothers' voice boomed around the stands urging people who knew how to to fight back. Well he knew how to fight. He was a member of the Order of the Phoenix. He had signed on to try and stop these fights.

He pulled his wand out of his robes and looked around. The Western stands were chaos as a small group of men attempted to fight back. Anton knew who they were. He would know his own brother anywhere and the Prewett's hair made them stand out. They were fighting one on one. They didn't need his help.

He circled and spotted Edgar Bones and Benjy Fenwick in the North Stands. It looked as though they had taken the three Death Eaters there by surprise. One was on the ground and they too were in single handed duels.

As he faced the East Stands he spotted Emmeline Vance, Dedalus Diggle and an Auror he believed to be called Sidney. He began to believe that the Death Eaters hadn't expected to have anyone fight back. Of the four in that stand only three were left standing and it was a clear fight between them all.

But when Anton came into line with the Southern stands he was met with a different picture. Dearborn a member of the Order was firing spells from three rows behind at the attackers. They didn't look as if his attack bothered them much and he supposed one against seven put the odds in the Death Eaters favour.

With a grim look set on his face Anton raised his wand and started his own barrage on the seven attackers.

* * *

Frank ducked as a flaming red spell narrowly missed the top of his head. He could feel the tips of his hair frazzle as if fire had brushed the strands. Around him were screams of terrified people but he tried to block them out. This was something that Moody had been teaching him. He needed to forget his surroundings and fight.

His dash over to the attack had been difficult. People were pushing in the opposite direction. He had heard screams as people fell to the ground and were trampled on in haste to try and get away. It had felt like hours before he had reached the inner zone.

He hated this zone more than any other. He had been out with Aurors had witnessed the aftermath of attacks and it was always the same. In a public zone there would be a line and everyone within it would be injured or dead. The stand was littered with bodies.

But Frank hadn't had time to worry about that. He'd climbed over them and carried on. Then he had met the Death Eaters. Five remained on their feet and Frank pushed into them firing spells. He dislodged the footing of one or two as he tumbled among them. He knew that it was safer to fight with a gap. But there were too many people about.

A hand pulled him up by the back of his top. He didn't turn to look who it was. The shouted hex from the mouth told him it was Kyle. He didn't look around as he held the gaze of a fierce man about five inches taller than him.

With his wand in his hand he took the man on in hand to hand combat.

* * *

Branwen was crumpled on the floor as she listened to Joe. Lily had her arms wrapped tightly around her in support. Joe had just announced that people were fighting back. He had called for Aurors to get there. And worse he had mentioned Frank. Alice was on the floor in floods of tears knowing that he was there in the thick of it. Both Remus and Peter were trying to comfort her and convince her that Frank would be alright.

"We need to get there now."

"Sirius how's that going to help?"

"_I CAN SEE A STAMPEDE IN THE NOR__TH STANDS. PLEASE DON'T PUSH EACH OTHER. THE DEATH EATERS ARE BUSY FIGHTING IF YOU'RE BY THE EXIT POINT YOU SHOULD BE SAFE. DON'T HURT EACH OTHER."_

Amanda and Sirius were facing each other. Sirius' hands were tightened into fists and his eyes were wide with anger. It was clear he was upset deeply by the events. Maybe it was the fact that this was a reminder of Christmas for him.

Amanda on the other hand looked slightly calmer. Her eyes were shut tight and she was biting her lower lip. James had an arm around her shoulders as he faced the radio listening intently to what was being said.

"It will help Amanda by giving them more backup."

"And don't you think the Aurors will be arriving? Don't you think they're going to have enough trouble getting inside against the flow of people trying to escape? All we can do is stay here and wait."

"_SHIT I CAN'T WATCH THIS. THEY'RE TRAMPLING EACH OTHER TO DEATH. MOODY WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU AND YOUR AURORS? NOOOOOOOOOO! KYLE DUCK BEFORE HE HITS YOU …"_

Branwen felt the tears in her eyes. This was too much. She wanted to move and turn the radio off. Around her students were crying. Some were screaming with the knowledge that loved ones were at the game.

"They need help let's go."

Sirius' voice was firm and commanding. But James' reply was about to put an end to it.

"We can't help. If we go there we'll get in the way. So sit down and listen to Joe. We'll know the outcome soon. It's not going to last much longer."

* * *

A quick shield spell saved Anton from a nasty looking purple spiked cloud. He didn't like to imagine what it would have done to him if it had connected. Worse was the fact that he was still on his broom hovering five feet away from the stands.

Out of the seven Death Eaters in the South Stand four remained on their feet. Dearborn had managed to take one out before he had been knocked unconscious. Anton hadn't seen the tip of his blonde hair in nearly five minutes. That meant he was the main target for the four remaining Death Eaters.

A scream off to the left drew his attention. A small girl was plummeting to the ground. He could hear her screams as she fell further and further.

Going into a quick dive Anton followed her path. Gravity was pulling her down quickly but he had the skill and knowledge to use it to his advantage. The girl didn't. He quickened his pace forgetting the four attackers behind him.

He was within reach taking his left hand from his broom he reached forward. His fingers closed around a foot and he pulled the girl harder. Then she was in front of him. She was screaming with tears escaping her closed lids.

"It's okay your safe. I've got you."

She buried her face in his chest as he landed on the ground. He held her close hoping that her parents had survived the attacked.

* * *

"THANK MERLIN HE'S GOT HER. ANTON HAS CAUGHT THE GIRL ABOUT THREE FEET FROM THE GROUND."

Joe closed his eyes thankful that she had been saved. But now there was nobody in the South Stands except for him. He needed to get down to the front. He ran to the door and started pulling on it. But he knew it was locked. He swore loudly turning to Bertie.

"OPEN THIS DOOR. I NEED TO GET DOWN TO THE FRONT. THERE'S NOBODY TO STOP THOSE BLOODY DEATH EATERS."

"Joe stay here."

"MY BROTHER JUST SAVED A GIRLS LIFE AND I'M UP HERE TELLING PEOPLE TO STAY CALM. FORGET IT BERTIE. LET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE. OTHERWISE THEY'LL GET AWAY."

"Sorry but I can't."

* * *

Moody was swearing as he tried to push his way through the crowd of panicked people. This was why he never came to matches anymore. He had been saying for years that they needed to look at security for Quidditch. He had claimed it would only be a matter of time before the Death Eaters attacked a game. And now that had come to happen.

He shook his head furiously as he attempted to push his way through to the stands. This was a nightmare. Terrified people were pushing against him to try and escape. They didn't seem to grasp that he was an Auror trying to get in to help the situation.

He had been in the office when he had heard Joseph Wild over the radio. It had been on quite low as background noise. But his loud cry of Death Eaters had vibrated through the office. Quickly they had jumped into action.

They had been teaming up when he announced that they were in the other stands. That had been quick thinking on Wild's part. It allowed the Aurors to separate before they reached the stands.

An elbow in his side made the man swear as he continued to push. He was almost up to the West Wing. Hopefully he wouldn't be too late.

* * *

Tears were running down Alice's face as she listened to Joe's yells. He was screaming and swearing at a man named Bertie to let him out into the stands. He was getting more frantic with each passing moment and it was scaring her.

He didn't seem to be thinking through his words as he yelled that the South Stands were defenceless and that the largest group of resistance was in the West Stands. Then she heard the words that sent shivers up her spine.

"_Bertie for crying out loud. You see that group fighting in the West Stands that's my brother Kyle and my best mate Frank. And with them are our friends Fabian, Gideon and John. They're out there fighting and I'm stuck in here. I can help. I know how to fight."_

"_No go Joe. You're not leaving here until it's over. It's not safe."_

"_I don't care about safety! There are still people in the stands and they're not fighting. DEFEND YOURSELFS PEOPLE. Now let me out to help."_

Alice's vision was blurry. Frank was out there fighting. Joe could see him. She knew it was stupid he was an Auror but she didn't have to listen to him fighting. Not normally. The world around her seemed to be getting darker as fear took over.

* * *

Anton stood where he had landed moments before. The small girl had her head tucked into his shoulder and her whimpering cries were vibrating along his shoulder. Gently he stroked her hair and muttered words of comfort. His focus though was no longer on her.

His brother's angry demands were echoing through the stands. He was loud and clear over the speaker system. But behind his words were the muffled screams of those still in the stands. The people who were still trying to push their way out.

Anton knew that the stands had been nearly full for this match. There were thousands of people there. How many had already managed to escape? Worse of all how many would never be able too?

As he stood there looking up at the stands a shiver ran the length of his body. A skull started to form in the clear blue sky. The green sparks that formed it made it look more sinister than he had remembered it being. His eyes were wide as he watched soundlessly as the sparks moved to make the mouth open. Then a large serpent appeared to sliver through the mouth.

The intensity of the screams increased as those still trying to get away saw what he saw. Quickly he pinned the girls head to his shoulder. This was something she didn't need to witness. And at a loss of what else to do he stood there waiting and hoping that this would mean like so many other times that the attack was over.

* * *

Frank raised his wand ready to fire when a pop sounded. The dark cloak of the Death Eater he had been about to stun disappeared and he was left facing Kyle. Thanks to quick reflexes he was able to block the spell that Kyle had just thrown at the vanished attacker.

Around him he heard the mutterings of his friends and he knew that they had all left. The attack was over this time. Turning he saw the mark above the stadium and felt his skin crawl. That sign disturbed him in so many ways. He remembered the last time he had seen it hovering over the Potter's home. It was the sign of death.

The screams were still loud as those frightened people who were hid behind chairs hoping that they were shielded took in the horrid image. Frank simply shook his head as he looked at his friends. Fabian and Gideon were aiding John in his attempts to locate injured among the dead. Unfortunately it seemed that those closest to them were all lost. The Death Eaters had been very quick to kill.

Frank leaned over one of the two stunned Death Eaters. As he pulled him up and muttered a spell that would tie him up he noticed Kyle do the same. With a sigh he looked around wondering what would be the best way to get these two to Azkaban.

* * *

Moody swore loudly as he finally stepped out onto the terrace. The stands seemed so empty compared to the stairways. But there were still people filled around. Some were close to the door having been trying to escape when the fight had ended.

He shook his head as he took in the state on those laid out on the floor. Some were moaning and clutching body parts whilst some simply stared up at the Dark Mark never seeing it. Moody had to admit that this stand looked bad.

He had chosen the West one because Joe had commented that it had been filled with the most Death Eaters. He was experienced and he was still seeking revenge for his wife from those years earlier. He always chose the tougher of the fights. Yet he was sure that the other stands would hold similar scenes for his team.

It was whilst staring at the fallen that he noticed John Warren. He was crouched over a young woman who was crying and holding onto a young man with golden hair. Warren had been in these stands. Moody knew what that meant. He had overheard the group of young men in the Order meeting talking about what fun they would have in this game.

He turned and spotted the youngest member of his team.

"Longbottom how many did you get?"

The young man turned around and gave him a nod as he began to speak.

"We've got two that are stunned over here Sir. And there's one two rows back that was killed by one of his friends and I think Gideon is there one by you?"

Moody looked towards a red haired man who nodded.

"Yeah got a woman whose legs are boneless. I think you'll need to get a Healer to check her out. But John's too busy."

Moody gave a nod as he looked back at Warren. Fabian was pulling the woman off the man's body as John spoke softly. There didn't seem to be much he could do down here.

"Warren you might want to take a look further up by the exit. There are quite a lot of trampled people there. You may be able to save some of them."

The man left Fabian with the woman as he charged off towards the spot Moody had mentioned. The Auror indicated to the team that had followed him to go help him. Then he made his way over to where Longbottom and one of the Wild boys were stood.

"Tell me everything that happened boys. Don't miss a single thing out."

* * *

"It's all over."

Joe stopped pulling at the handle. He had been frantically calling out words hoping that one was the key word that would let him out. Nothing had worked. But Pippa's small voice got him to turn around.

He walked slowly back towards the window and looked around. He could see Aurors on the stands looking at injured and collecting what he thought were Death Eaters. Healers were starting to appear and he wondered how long it would be before they moved the dead.

On the ground he could see his brother holding the little girl tightly. His eyes were pointed up at the sky as he stood there watching the scenes above. Then his eyes went to the West stand and he saw his friends. They were still all standing.

He shook his head as he turned towards Bertie. In one movement he punched the man in the face. He watched him hit the ground and spoke not caring that those in the stadium and listening on the radio could hear him.

"The Death Eaters are gone and the fights over. But the people I cared about were in danger. If you ever stop me from helping again I'll show you what I can do. And trust me Bertie I've fought Death Eaters and you wouldn't be able to stop me."


	65. Chapter 65

Chapter 65

The headlines for the Prophet were dominated with the attack on the Quidditch game. It seemed that Joe's coverage had been analysed by the reporters and they had taken it apart piece by piece. Witnesses had been interviewed and there were pages of columns entitled 'my story'.

Alice closed the paper unable to read anymore of it. She still felt sick thinking about what she had heard. The twenty minutes had been some of her worse ever. It had felt as though hours had passed as she had heard Joe's panicked voice and known that Frank was there.

As the live link had ended yesterday the room had gone silent. Nobody in the room had been able to speak. They had simply sat there. Some were crying while others stared off into space. Alice wondered if some had been remembering attacks they had witnessed. So many Gryffindors had been in Hogsmeade eleven months earlier when the attack had happened. Personally Christmas had been running through her mind.

It had felt like a lifetime before she had received a scribbled note from Frank. It had been addressed to everyone stating that they were all alive. There had been no mention of any injuries and she had worried over that. But if anyone had been seriously injured Frank would have mentioned that.

While her friends had sat around working out theories for why the attack had happened and who the target was she had gone to bed. She couldn't sit there and think about such things. Maybe she wasn't strong enough for that. Suddenly her plan to follow Frank and become an Auror seemed much too scary for her.

She had curled up under the blankets in her bed and cried herself to sleep. When she had awoken her eyes felt sore and she was still exhausted. Yet she had gotten up and headed for breakfast. She was one of the first down there and she wasn't bothered by that.

As she sipped a cup of tea she imagined again how she had once thought this year would be. As a little girl she had dreamt about Hogwarts and nothing had turned out the way she had planned it to be. And today marked one of those that she had dreamt about forever. She was eighteen today and things weren't how she had wanted them.

She had always thought that her parents would be here. That they would send her a special present to mark her last birthday in school. They would realise that next year she would be an independent woman so this would be their last chance to spoil her. That dream had been lost two years earlier.

She had also had an idea that she would have a boyfriend in her year group and he would spend the day with her making her smile and feel special. She didn't mind so much that this wasn't happening. She loved Frank too much to care that he wasn't a student anymore. But she did wish he would be here today. Especially after yesterday. But he had so much work to do as a result of the attack.

Alice cut up a piece of omelette and looked around. The hall was still pretty empty and her friends were all in bed. She was sure that later they would surprise her with presents and smiles. That they would sneak food from the kitchens and go up to the boys dorms and pig out while laughing happily. It was what they had done for everyone so far this year. It felt relaxed and fun. And she was grateful that she got to spend her birthday with her friends.

"Knut for you thoughts."

Alice felt her eyes widen as she turned around to look in the direction of the voice. She hadn't seen him enter the hall and he had startled her. A smile came to her lips as she looked him up and down. There was a slight cut on his left cheek but otherwise he looked perfect to her.

"Well don't I even get a hug?"

She was out from the table and in his arms in moments. He held her tightly and she clung to him.

"Frank I was so scared. I kept thinking something terrible was going to happen to you."

She heard his gentle reassurance as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"No need for you to worry now. Especially on your birthday."

She pulled away and smiled at him. With so few people in the room she didn't feel uncomfortable leaning up and brushing her lips against his. As she pulled away he took her hand and spoke gently.

"Let's go for a little walk. I can't stay too long but I wanted to give you your birthday present."

Together they walked out of the hall and Frank lead her out into the grounds. The weather today was as bright as yesterdays. Alice knew how lucky that was. April was famous for its showers but the first three days had been sunny.

In a comfortable silence they walked together towards the lake. Alice interlocked her fingers with Frank's and thought about how much she missed this. She had always taken it for granted being together. Walking hand in hand around the school. Even during that awful period when they weren't together she was use to his company. This year had been an awaking for her. She didn't like not seeing him everyday.

Frank stopped walking when they were a couple of yards from the lake. The trees that were starting to green towered over them and the grass was littered with the yellows of daffodils and pinks of tulips. They stood looking out at the calm lake for a few minutes before Frank turned and spoke to her.

"You realise that you never told me what you wanted for your birthday."

She gave him a wide smile as she nodded.

"I told you that all I wanted was to spend some time with you. I don't want anything else from you."

He gave her a look that made her grin as he shrugged his shoulders.

"So I'm guessing you won't be wanting this then."

In his hand was a box wrapped in a simple silver paper.

"Well since you have it…"

Her smile widened as he laughed. She took the small box from him and judged the weight. It was small and she wondered if he had bought her the pair of earrings she had been telling Aunt Enid about over Christmas.

Carefully she pulled back a corner of the paper and out slipped the blue box. She looked up at Frank and saw that he was watching her carefully judging her reaction. She gave him a smile as she lifted the top of the box.

As she did so everything suddenly changed. Her mouth dropped open as she tried to take in what she was looking at. There was a ring inside, the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. It was white and she could see alternate round diamonds and sapphires set into it. And in the middle sat a heart shaped diamond.

She couldn't speak as she looked back up at Frank. But he wasn't standing there. As she had opened the lid he had dropped to one knee. Now as she watched he leaned up and took her left hand in both of his.

"Alice I remember the first time I saw you. You had short hair pulled back in a ponytail and was completely covered in mud. And you stepped forward with Peter and James and explained that someone had tripped on the way to the boats and you'd all fallen in the mud. And I remember thinking that it was funny and that you must have been brave to walk into the hall covered in mud and to have spoken up to Dumbledore like that. And I knew in that moment that I wanted to speak to you and I just hoped that you would speak to me."

"And then the next morning when I was heading down to breakfast there you were panicking because you thought you were lost. And I got to speak to you. You introduced everyone and then walking down you asked me about classes and how long it took to learn to get to places. And when I went to sit with my friends then I remember thinking that you were amazing and I just wanted to keep talking to you. But it was hard because you were still getting use to the place."

"Then in your second year when the guys joined the Quidditch team I got to know you better. And we became friends and I just loved spending time with you. You made me laugh, you made me feel smart and everything felt so easy. But I just couldn't ask you out. Do you realise that I spent two years trying to pluck up the courage. Then I decided at the start of my fourth year to just do it. And again it took me until November to do it. But I remember that you asked me to Hogsmeade before I could ask you. And I just smiled all day, I couldn't stop."

"That moment was the start of the most fantastic part of my life. I just never wanted it to end. And then two years ago when he had that awful misunderstanding it felt like my world ended. Sometimes in my nightmares I see your face that day and hear the echoes of your voice _'__Frank I love you, but I can't trust you'. _It broke my heart and the worse part was that it was that day that I realised that I loved you. It was that day that I realised that I never wanted to be apart from you."

"I know I messed up but I have never been more thankful than the day you forgave me. It felt like suddenly the sun came back out and I was living again. And since that day I've tried everything not to hurt you. Because I never want to go through that again."

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you Alice and I've loved you for so long that I can't imagine not having you. I know that I'm not perfect and that I've done things in the past that have hurt you but I will never do that again."

"So I'm asking you Alice Scott if you will please do me the greatest honour and agree to be my wife."

Alice had stood in stunned silence throughout Frank's speech. Her eyes were welling up with tears as she tried to think of something fantastic to answer with. But there was only one thing that kept coming to mind.

"Yes. Frank yes."

He was suddenly on his feet and taking the ring from the box. Gently he slipped it over her finger as he gazed into her eyes. Then his lips were on hers as he held her tightly to him.


	66. Chapter 66

Chapter 66

Alice pulled back from Frank and grinned. Her eyes fluttered down to the new ring that was sat on her finger.

"Does it fit alright?"

She twirled it around her finger and looked up at her boyfriend, no her fiancé.

"It's a tiny bit too big but Amanda knows a spell to shrink rings to fit. I'll get her to show me later."

She noticed how he was smiling as widely as she was. Again she leaned up and kissed him.

"If I'd have known I would feel this happy when you said yes I would have asked you at Christmas."

She pulled away and looked at him.

"How long have you been planning this then?"

"Since November."

Alice rested her head against his chest as his arms wrapped around her.

"I wish I could tell my mum she'd have been so excited."

"You can tell mine if you want."

She laughed lightly.

"I think that's your job."

She felt Frank's lips brush against her forehead and he sighed.

"I really want to stay here with you but …"

"You're dealing with the aftermath of yesterday."

She felt him nod. Pulling back a little she looked up into his eyes.

"How bad was it?"

"I want to tell you. Not today. It should only be about good things."

She gave a little nod.

"Are you coming back inside? The guys will want to see you."

"I wish I could. You'll just have to tell them all by yourself."

He was laughing and she gave him a little swot.

"You're lucky I love you Mr. Longbottom otherwise I'd make you pay for leaving me to do it alone."

"Well Miss. Scott I think you can deal with our friends on your own. You're a big girl after all."

He kissed her again and she melted into his lips. She almost wanted to cry when he pulled away.

"I really have to go. But there's a Hogsmeade trip soon right. I'll meet you in the café that day. Bring everyone with you."

She didn't want to let go of him. But with effort she managed it. She watched as he carefully took her hand in his and brought her fingers to his mouth.

"I love you Alice."

"I love you too Frank."

Then after giving her fingers a little squeeze he turned to walk away. He took his time and she knew he was as reluctant as she was for his departure. Once he had turned the corner Alice looked once more at her ring. It was beautiful beyond words and she couldn't believe that it was really hers.

As she walked up to the castle her mind let her feet automatically make the trip. She knew she could walk it in her sleep. Her mind was elsewhere as she imagined what would be her wedding.

Her idea of reality had drastically changed a year earlier when she had lost her family. Up until that point her weddings dreams had been simple. She would be in a fantastic gown clinging to her fathers arm as he walked her down the aisle towards the man she loved. In the front row would be her mother being comforted by Aaron as she cried over how beautiful her only daughter looked on that day.

That wouldn't be happening now. She began to list the men in her life who she could ask to give her away on her big day. There was Frank's Uncle Algie, or his step father Victor. Or she could go with one of the boys. She tried to imagine holding onto James, Remus, Sirius or even Peter. It didn't seem too bad. She knew that Joe would be out of the question he'd be best man. But there were his brothers Kyle or Anton. They had become a major part of Alice's life. The only other option she could consider was having one of the 'extended' family members do it. But they were decreasing in numbers, there were only Remus' dad (who she'd only met a few times), Lily's grandfather (who she'd never met) or Professor Ddraig (and that would be weird).

She opened the main door and rethought that last one. Would it be that weird having Branwen's dad give her away? He had been a friend of her fathers through a secret group that stood against Voldemort. He had been the one that had discovered her family and delivered the news to her. Over the years he had watched out not only for his daughter but for her friends. Maybe she would speak to Branwen and see what she thought of it.

Suddenly her mind had moved onto another topic. Colours. Would she get married in white or ivory? Maybe she could go for a cream coloured dress. And what about her bridesmaids? Amanda, Branwen and Lily were all so different. Could she find a colour that would suit all three? And their style of clothes differed so much. Amanda would feel comfortable in something over the top but would the others? Would they all agree on a style?

Then without warning as she was climbing the staircase up to the seventh floor another problem hit her. When would they get married? Because if it was winter she'd have to have a different style than in the summer. Plus colours would be different in summer than winter due to the types of flowers she'd be able to have. A panic was already starting to come over her.

"Password."

Alice jumped when she heard the voice of the portrait.

"Circe."

Alice felt like she was in a trance as the portrait swung open and she stepped inside. It was still early for a Sunday and the common room was quite empty. She knew that a lot of the students were either sleeping in or down in the Great Hall having breakfast.

Swiftly she moved and dropped onto the sofa and stared into the empty fireplace. She knew that Sirius was sat next to her and the way he was looking at his watch made it obvious that he was waiting for Amanda to go to breakfast.

"Happy Birthday Alice."

She turned and smiled at him happily. She needed to push the organisation out of her mind right now. She had plenty of time to worry over that. She was going to enjoy her birthday.

"Thanks Sirius. You waiting for Amanda?"

He gave her a curt little nod.

"She wanted to go change her shoes apparently she decided after coming down here that they weren't comfy enough for breakfast."

Alice laughed.

"Where're the others."

"Eating."

"I'm ready."

"Bout time."

Sirius stood up and marched towards the door. Amanda was smiling and shaking her head in the way that only someone in love can. Alice chuckled as she called out to Amanda.

"I don't want to make Sirius mad and miss breakfast but what's the spell for shrinking rings down to size?"

"Orbisbrevis. Why?"

"Frank got me a ring for my birthday but it's slightly too big."

Alice's stomach knotted with excitement as her friend moved around the couch to have a look at the ring. As Amanda's eyes went to Alice's left hand she heard the air escape as a small eek sound slipped through her friend's mouth.

"Frank proposed! Please tell me he did it in person and not through the mail."

Alice was grinning now.

"He just left."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Amanda pounced at that moment. Alice was held in such a tight grip that she made a strange sound.

"Sorry. But you're getting married! Sirius go for breakfast and send the girls up. We need to celebrate."

Alice was grinning as she and Amanda dropped onto the seat. There were so many questions escaping from her friend but she kept saying to wait. It was only minutes before the portrait swung open to screams of delight. Then Alice was once more being hugged as the four girls sat there discussing everything that would need doing.


	67. Chapter 67

Chapter 67

Amanda turned over and gave an almost silent huff. She tried plumping her pillows up but when she laid down she still wasn't content. With another huff she threw the blanket off and opened the curtain. The moonlight flittered through the windows and she wondered how Remus was coping tonight. It would be at its fullest tomorrow and the strain had been showing earlier when he had celebrated Alice's birthday with them.

She knew that he was out in the shack tonight because he would turn. He wouldn't be as vicious as he was on the full moon but tonight he would still be bad. She remembered the one time she had ever seen a werewolf in the full moon. It had terrified her greatly. In that moment she had realised how vile her father truly was.

Of course she had known that she wasn't really in any danger. Her father at the time wouldn't have risked turning his six year old daughter like that. But Fenir Greyback still scared her. She could imagine the look that must have crossed Remus' face that same year when the monster had bitten him.

A shiver ran through her body at that moment. She didn't like to think of Remus in that way. She remembered the day in fifth year when she confronted him with the truth he had looked so scared that she had worked out his secret. But it had never been something that became a problem. To her he was still Remus, just a guy she didn't want to be around at the full moon.

Looking out the window she wondered what it was like to transfigure into something else. She had an idea that Remus was probably not the only one to know what it felt like. Not that she would ever say that out loud. In fact she was determined not to think it. But with Sirius as a boyfriend it wasn't difficult to notice that three nights a month he disappeared.

Crossing her fingers she left the dorm room and made her way to the common one. Sirius had been complaining of a stomach upset that evening so hopefully that had kept him away from wherever it was he usually went at this time of the month.

Opening the door to the boys' dorm she was met by three empty beds. Trying to ignore the questions in her head she stepped inside and closed the door behind her. She felt a flutter in her stomach as she remembered the last time she had been alone in this room with Sirius. It had been Valentine's Day. A small smile played on her lips thinking about it.

Shaking her head to try and clear it she moved over to the bed. The boy, no man, he had become a man looked so peaceful. Part of her felt guilty for wanting to wake him up and she almost turned around. But something stopped her. Instead she leaned over close and gently kissed his lips.

His eyes didn't open as he returned the kiss. She wondered if this was reflex on his part or if he was awake. Pulling a little further back she was surprised when he moved with her. Planting her hands on his shoulders she pushed him slightly backwards so there was a small space between them.

"I like your wake up calls."

With a wide smile she moved and sat on the edge of the bed. Her mind was still remembering their last alone moment so she was hesitant to get any closer. But he didn't seem to care as he wrapped his arms around her pulling her against his chest.

"So what did I do to deserve a midnight visit then?"

"I was thinking about Alice and Frank."

A groan left his mouth as he released her.

"We've already had a marriage conversation Amanda. I don't want another one."

"I don't want to talk about us getting married Sirius. I've had an idea but I need you to agree to it."

She turned and looked up at his face. She could see a shadow of stubble brushing his chin. It was a strange sight as he was usually so clean shaven.

"What is it?"

"We have a church for July that's just going to go to waste. I think that we should offer it to Frank."

"It won't give them much time to organise things Mand."

"Sirius the church is booked and paid for so they can have that for free and they've booked your grandmothers restaurant free of charge. We just tell the minister that there's a change of name and change the restaurant booking to the name Longbottom for the restaurant and everything else can be sorted."

"Oh really and how do you suppose that will be done?"

Amanda smiled as she looked at the man beside her.

"Your mother has told florists and dress makers that there's a wedding in July. If I were to sign orders for Alice they'd be rushed and done on time. You know people are scared of our names. It can be done. But if they want it to be done."

Sirius wrapped his arms around her and whispered in her ear.

"I'll send Frank an owl in the morning offering him them and telling him that you are more than willing to bully shop owners into getting orders done on time if he wants it."

"Thank you."

He kissed her lips again and she relaxed against him. As his hands went up her back he chuckled and she pulled slightly away.

"What's funny?"

"I was just remembering the last time we were alone."

She laughed softly at that and looked around.

"What time are you expecting Peter back?"

His lips brushed hers again and she wrapped her arms around him. She had been in his bed many times over the years and knew that when he slept he never wore more than a pair of boxers or if cold sweat pants. But it felt different touching his back this time. His hands brushed against the thin top that she wore and before she knew it his fingers were against her spine.

As their kiss deepened and his hands ran up her body she felt him stiffen. He started to pat her back in a strange way. Then his lips were off hers.

"No bra?"

"I don't sleep in them."

She closed the gap between them and took her hands to his face. Gently she traced patterns on his stubble feeling the rough patches. His kisses tickled her face in a way that wasn't normal as his hand slipped from her back to front.

This time as his fingers came into contact with her breasts there was no squeal. A tingle shot through her body and she heard her own muffled voice through the kiss. He stopped for a moment as if considering what he was doing and then she felt his fingers tracing small circular patterns.

Again she couldn't help the moan that escaped from her lips. Again he stopped but this time he pulled his lips from hers. Amanda had her eyes closed and she felt the soft sensation of his lips against her cheek.

"I think you should go back to your own room Mand."

They hadn't moved apart and she tilted her head finally opening her eyes to look at him. There was something soft about his look and she brushed her fingers across his lips.

"What if I want to stay here?"

She was surprised by how small her voice was.

"I won't be able to stop and I don't think either of us want to have James or Peter walk in on us in a situation like that."

Reluctantly she gave a little nod as he pulled his hands from under her top. She leaned in once more and kissed him. Then wishing that she could stay there she got up and walked out of the room.

* * *

Hi everyone

Thanks so much to everyone that has reviewed and taken the time to read. I want to tell you that there are 10 chapters left to year 7. But I do have 14 written for After Hogwarts already. I also want to apologise for ow slowly my posting is. I don't know if I ever mentioned but I'm a Nursing Student so have very little time to myself these days. However I'm hoping you will stick with me and I'll attempt to post again soon.

Kris xx


	68. Chapter 68

Chapter 68

Frank picked at the meal as he stared off into space. His mind was not on the conversation that his Uncle Algie was having with Victor. He wondered how many people would find it strange that his aunt and uncle came round almost every night for food with them. It was tradition that had been started with his fathers death and had never altered.

"Frank what do you think?"

He tapped his knife against the plate as he thought about yesterday and the look of sheer bewilderment on Alice's face before the joy set in. It was a look he knew he'd never forget until his dying day.

"Frank?"

He had told Joe the night before about the engagement and straight away his friend had started rambling off about stag parties. He was already a little apprehensive about what Joe would plan. His friend claimed that it was the best mans job to make sure the groom got blotted on his night out. Not that Frank had asked him to be best man yet.

"FRANK!"

"Pardon?"

He looked at his step father with confusion as four pairs of eyes looked at him. The older man gave a little smile at him.

"Women trouble or work trouble?"

"What?"

"When a man stares off and doesn't contribute to a conversation about Quidditch either he has women problems or work ones. So which is it?"

He hadn't told his family yet about him and Alice. He had been planning on it the night before but he had been down the pub with Joe and the boys late into the night. He then decided this morning would have done, only to wake up late and have missed his mum. But now seemed like it would be the right time.

Frank opened his mouth when a squawk made him turn. A small black owl was sat on the windowsill its Violet eyes piercing him. He heard his aunt gasp as she took in the bird.

"What strange eyes that bird has? Whose is it?"

Frank stood up and made his way over to the owl.

"Hello Mid-Knight is that letter for me?"

A small little hoot was his reply as he took the letter. Gently he stroked the owls feathers with affection.

"Why don't you go into the kitchen and have a rest. There's food and water out there for Tibby."

Tibby was his mothers owl. The black one took flight into the kitchen as Frank opened the envelope with his name on. The handwriting inside was the scruffy scrawl of Sirius'.

_Frank_

_Congratulations on your engagement. The girls are going crazy over here. They are in love with the ring that you picked out. I don't think Alice has stopped showing it off yet._

_Anyway Amanda is driving me a little nuts. The girl woke me up in the middle of last night to talk about your engagement and has nagged me all day about this letter. The short of it is she thinks we should offer you our church._

_I don't want to push you into thinking you have to have it. But if you want to get married sooner rather than later you can have it. It's been booked and paid for so July 1st if you like you can use it**…**._

_It's Amanda now Sirius isn't describing this at all well so I'll do it myself._

_You of course know that his parents are planning our wedding. Well they have booked Minister Abbey in Minster in Isle of Sheppey. It's a lovely old fashioned church that both you and Alice will love. It's ours on July first but of course Sirius and I have no plans to use it. And instead of letting it go to waste I thought that maybe you'd like it._

_Before you start to panic it is fully paid for and you wouldn't have to worry about that. As for a reception again you can have ours. Sirius' parents have booked Madam Melania's (no surprise since it is Bootés mothers shop) and we can easily change the name of the booking to Longbottom._

_Like Sirius did say we don't want to be pushy and if you'd rather wait that's fine. If your worried that it will be too soon to get things organised it can be easily done. I am more than willing to use my name for gain in this case and I'll use Sirius' too._

_So just let us know what you think. We haven't told Alice because we wanted to run it passed you first._

_Amanda and Sirius_

Frank couldn't help but laugh as he sat back down. The pair of them really had flare when put together. Sitting back in his chair he looked at his family and smiled.

"There's something I need to tell you."

"Is it about that letter son?"

He looked at his Uncle and gave a little shrug.

"Partly."

For a moment he closed his eyes and concentrated. He wondered if it would have been easier to do this with Alice sat next to him or not. Then opening them he looked straight at his mother.

"I've asked Alice to marry me and she said yes."

There was noise everywhere. For four people to make so much was beyond Frank. He was pulled up and hugged by his mum and Aunt Enid while Uncle Algie and Victor shook his hand. Everyone was babbling mess. Then his mother was heard clearly.

"There's so much to plan. When are you planning it for?"

"That's where the letter comes in. Sirius and Amanda have a church for July 1st that they won't be using so its ours if we want it."

"But that's not much time?"

Aunt Enid looked longingly into the distance as if considering everything.

"It can be done. What does Alice think of the date?"

Frank smiled with a shrug.

"I'll write and ask."

And as he stood up everything suddenly became real. He was getting married.

* * *

I'm so sorry for the length of time between posts theres a load of reasons for why it has been delayed. I won't give them all to you except to warn you it might be a while until the next one because my laptop died two months ago and its a complete nightmare. But I hope you'll stick with me and I'll try to get more up soon

Kris xx


	69. Chapter 69

Chapter 69

Two weeks had passed since Alice's birthday and April was certainly turning into a very strange month. She was spending evening after evening revising for the exams that were so close but before going to bed she would have to answer Augusta's letters concerning the wedding.

The Tuesday morning after her birthday she had received an owl from Frank stating that if she would agree they could get married on July 1st. That seemed so soon to her and yet it excited her. She would finish Hogwarts June 24th and be a married woman seven days later.

It hadn't taken her long to discover that they were having the church that Sirius and Amanda were due to have. It had been a bit more shocking to learn that they had given them their reception too. Alice wondered how she would ever be able to pay them back. Sirius' joke of naming their first born after him had made her laugh.

But since then things had been a whirl wind of decisions. Colours had needed to be chosen and that had been too hard. She had sat with her friends and gone through colour after colour with no success. So it had been decided that instead of Hogsmeade on the 16th she would go and look at dresses.

As the boys left the grounds heading down to the small town to relax Alice stood nervously just outside the gates with her friends. They had booked an appointment with a shop named Topaz which had just opened in Diagon Alley. Alice knew that it was a chained store throughout Europe and she was hoping to find the perfect dress.

"I feel so sick. What if I don't like anything?"

Lily gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"Then you don't buy a dress."

"But it's already the end of April I only two months. I need to find a dress here!"

"Breathe."

Lily pulled her into a hug as Branwen and Amanda ran through the gates.

"Sorry we're ready now."

The Welsh girl smiled as they got ready to apparate to London. Alice hated this feeling as she concentrated hard on the destination. She hadn't done this since Christmas. With a pop she was in London.

Lily and Branwen headed towards the store but Alice hung back walking slowly with Amanda. Her friend gave her a little smile as she took her hand.

"You look really nervous."

"I'm buying a wedding dress of course I'm nervous."

"If it makes you feel any better I got so scared when I had the letter from my grandmother saying I had to get one."

"Maybe you can try some on with me."

Amanda laughed as they reached the shop door.

"And when you tell Sirius that I was trying on dresses he's going to think I'm trying to push him into marriage again."

They laughed as they joined their two friends in the store. A woman with chestnut brown hair cut into a short bob stood behind the counter watching them. Alice wondered if the woman was thinking how young they all were. She knew that as a group they had grown up but she still felt like the student she was.

"Can I help you girls?"

That told Alice that the woman thought they were young. Forcing a smile onto her face she gave a little nod.

"I'm Alice Scott. I have an appointment."

"Ah yes I see your name. My name is Vanessa and I'll be here to help you today."

Alice smiled as Vanessa directed the four of them over to some seats. They all sat as Vanessa collected some parchment and a quill. The older witch sat opposite them and posed ready to take notes.

"So what style are you looking for?"

"I'm not sure. All I know is that I want something white.

The woman nodded and stood up.

"If you could just stand on this stool here I'll take some measurements."

Feeling as if everyone was staring Alice did as she was told. A measuring tape zoomed around her and the woman took more notes. Then she directed Alice to a seat.

"Alright well I don't have much to go on. If you wait here I'll pull out a few different styles and we can go from there."

Alice sat with her friends and looked around. The room was covered in dresses on hangers. They ranged in colour and style and she wondered if she would find the right one. Turning to her friends she asked something that was nagging her.

"What style should I get?"

Branwen spoke up.

"Something that you feel comfortable in and makes us all think wow. Don't worry we'll tell you when you find the right one."

Vanessa was back then and leading Alice into a curtained area. Inside were a mass of dresses. She followed instructions and put on the first dress allowing Vanessa to adjust it. Turning she looked in the mirror and felt her mouth drop. Looking back at her was someone else, it was a woman. It felt so strange to see herself in a dress like this.

The dress she had on was corseted. She felt almost like she couldn't breath as she looked at the details. It was strapless with green roses along the upper part of the dress. These were connected by a strand of green silk so fine that you could see through it. The top was fitted to her waist and then flowed out in a marshmallow style. Over the skirt were layers of white mess with more roses again connected by the silk.

The dress floated down to the floor and she touched it gently looking at herself. She wondered if this was the dress for her. She looked different and that was what she was going for. She turned and looked at the sales woman.

"What's it made of?"

"Satin and organza."

"Can I show my friends?"

"Of course."

Alice stepped out into the main shop and watched as her three friends looked up. They were smiling as she twirled for them to see.

"What do you think?"

"It's gorgeous."

Lily was smiling as she spoke. Branwen had her mouth open as she whispered.

"You look beautiful."

It was Amanda that ruined the moment.

"I think it sticks out too much and the green roses really I think its more Lily than you."

"Hey!"

Lily gave Amanda a slap at that but Alice smiled. This was why she had invited her three friends to be here today. They all had such different tastes in clothes but she knew that when something really suited they would all agree. Turning she looked at Vanessa.

"I'd like to try something that's a bit more compacted in the skirt."

She went back into the changing area and was helped out of the first dress. As she was tied into the second she watched in the mirror. This one was very different. It was a bit more old fashioned. The dress was again satin and fell in a pencil style. There were criss-crossing straps on the back with an amber brooch on the side.

As she stepped out in front of her friends she saw Amanda's raised eyebrows. She was the first to speak.

"You look so grown up in that Alice. It's so sophisticated."

"It does suit you Alice. You look like someone from a time gone by."

Branwen looked in complete awe. This time it was Lily that burst the bubble and Alice really had to agree.

"It's a little dated though. I thought you'd go for something a bit more modern."

So once again she turned and changed. The next dress as soon as she put it on she knew was wrong. It was lacy with glass, bugle and seed beads as well as sequins. She had only taken two steps from the changing room when all three heads shook saying no.

As soon as she put the next dress on she wanted to wrap her arms around herself. It was an overlaid dress so it was slightly wider in the skirt than the last two but not as big as the first. Over her shoulder sat two very thin straps and over the bust were detailed beading. But over the waist and stomach was a thin lace that was clearly see through. She felt too exposed as she met her friends.

The laughter from them made her blush but then she saw Branwen give Amanda a little shove as she tried to speak through her laughter.

"That's your one Mand. Sirius will love it."

Alice laughed at this as she headed back into the room. As she tried the next dress on something felt very different. Looking at herself in the mirror a smile came to her lips. The dress was a one-piece, satin, halter, A-line, corset back gown. The front had a modesty panel with lace adorning the bodice. It made her feel so comfortable. Then the cut-away skirt revealed lace appliquns that ornamented the panel insert. A satin empire band wrapped to the back of the gown created a dramatic streamer that cascaded toward the hem of the train. Finally there were more lace appliques that accented the back train and streamers.

Standing in front of the mirror this felt like the dress for her. As she walked out to her friends she watched as they all went silent and just stared. They didn't say a word as she turned for them. Their silence spoke depths to her and Alice turned to the saleswoman.

"This is the dress that I want. Can you have it ready by July 1st?"

"That will not be a problem Miss Scott."

"Excellent."

She felt very reluctant to change out of the dress but she did. As she slipped back into her pink summer dress she took a look at the panel that wrapped around her dress. It was a medium champagne sort of colour and it gave her an idea. As she stepped out into the main area she gave Vanessa a smile.

"I want the bridesmaid dresses to match the panel on that dress."

"Of course. And what sort of style dress are you looking for?"

She looked at her three friends and gave a soft smile.

"Something different. I don't want them in anything traditional."

The woman gave a nod and looked at the three of them.

"And which one of you is willing to be the model?"

Alice watched as her three friends leaned together. Then Amanda was pushed up by Branwen.

"I'll wear anything."

Alice, Lily and Branwen sat together laughing and joking about little things while they waited for Amanda to come out. When she did both Lily and Branwen gasped and Alice was certain that they wouldn't wear this dress.

It was a camisole style top with delicate gathers around the waist and when Amanda turned they could see two large bows with a fan detail on the skirt. But between the two bows was about five inches of skin and the dress barely passed Amanda's thighs. She looked extremely comfortable in it as she smiled and twirled and Alice had to admit the purple shade even looked good. She grinned as she spoke to Amanda.

"What do you think of it?"

"If they don't like it, make me your maid of honour and I'll wear it. It's fabulous."

"I'm not wearing that it's too short."

Lily folded her arms over her chest and Alice gave Amanda a little wink as her friend went to change into the next dress. When Amanda came out next she was twirling and acting as if she were about three. Her laugher made Alice laugh.

The dress was purple and green and looked like a ballet dancers. The top half was so tightly fitted that it looked almost impossible for Amanda to breathe in it. There were thick straps that were a deep purple over her shoulders low in a circular style. The entire top half of the dress was purple. Then it went to the skirt. That was a bright green with purple mess over the top. It looked really funky.

"This one makes me want to dance. I don't know if I'd be able to stand still in the church. Plus I get the feeling that the boys might find it funny to flick this skirt up and they'll see everything. Might just ruin a few of your photos."

"Just go change Amanda."

Alice gave a shrug as her friend disappeared. She seemed to be gone ages this time. Then she stepped out in a dress that made them all go quiet. The dress she was in was black but it was gorgeous. It was a strapless taffeta bodice dress with centre leaf corsage. The front of the skirt cut midway up her thighs but the back reached the floor in long layers of tulle skirt.

"Alice I like that one. I think I'd wear that."

Branwen's voice was soft with wonder and giving her a glance she was smiling approvingly at it. Lily too was staring.

"The front is a little short for my liking but you hardly notice with the length of the back of it. I'd wear it."

Then Amanda spoke up and there was a grin to her voice.

"You haven't seen the best bit."

She reached behind her and after a few moments she was holding the long part of the skirt in her hand and was stood in a tiny ra ra dress.

"See we could wear it long for the service in church and the official photos and the sit down meal. Then I can take the back off and dance."

Alice looked at her three friends. She was sure the other two wouldn't want to take the back off. But it was perfect. She turned to Vanessa and gave a grin.

"If you can get them in medium champagne we'll take three of them."

As her friends were getting fitted she was already constructing the letter she would write to Frank in her mind. She had promised to inform him of the bridesmaids colours so that he would be able to get waist coats for himself, Joe and Ddraig (who would be walking her down the aisle) to match.


	70. Chapter 70

Chapter 70

The excitement of organising a wedding seemed to make time pass quicker than normal. One moment it was April and the next May had appeared. The second day of the month brought panic and chaos to the school. Exams had started.

The seventh years were forced to spend hours sat in the Great Hall along with the fifth years answering questions in written exams and then following that the practical part. Stress level was high as the days rolled on and on.

The first week of the exams passed and the second week began. Lily was trying to stay focused as the tenth arrived. Her birthday this year felt like a very strange event. The first week had seen four exams for her, Transfiguration, Herbology, Ancient Runes and Charms. And her birthday brought Defence Against the Dark Arts.

The writing exam hadn't fazed her and she had taken it in her stride. But as she had lined up for the afternoon's practical exam her stomach had knotted. She had known that she was capable of passing the test. She knew that everything she needed to know was locked away in her head.

But when she had entered the room had had to hand duel the examiner something had snapped. It was the strangest feeling that for thirty seconds all she could do was a shield charm. Then something struck and she was firing jelly legs, and stunners. She was playing to her strengths using charms that made the man laugh and roll around on the floor. She had felt very relieved when he had yelled to stop.

Then it had been time to produce a Patronus. Her stomach had knotted as she recited the spell. She had only managed this on three occasions and then with a flash a parrot had flown around her head shimmering in the way that only a Patronus could.

The laughter that filled her was a relief as she was dismissed with a smile from the examiner. Even now sitting in the common room she couldn't help but grin.

"That was amazing I can't believe I managed it."

She was sat with Branwen, Amanda and Sirius. They were the only ones back from the exam so far. The four of them were on the comfy seats reliving the Patronus' that they had just produced. Lily couldn't help but grin as she described the parrot.

"It sort of flew around my head for a bit and then vanished. But you could clearly tell that it was a parrot. I can't believe that I have a parrot for my Patronus."

Sirius gave a nod in her direction as he chipped in.

"A parrot is cool but my raccoon could so beat up your parrot."

Branwen winked at Lily as she responded.

"And my mountain pony could stamp on your raccoon."

"Yep and my coyote would eat him Si."

The three girls lend together and laughed as Sirius made a pouty face.

"I still think my raccoon is the coolest."

Lily watched as Amanda leaned over and kissed him gently.

"A raccoon is very cool, I'd say as cool as Joe's howler monkey. And we all agreed that his was the coolest one last year."

"Well a monkey is obviously cooler than a mountain lion. I mean how dull is that for a Gryffindor. If I were Frank I'd be disappointed."

They laughed together and Lily felt relaxed for the first time that day. This was how birthdays were suppose to be. She knew that there would be no celebration this year for her. What with the fact that Alice had her Astronomy exam that night and Branwen, Remus and Amanda had Arithmancy the next day.

She was thankful though that she only had Potions left and that exam would be Thursday. She knew that the only other exam left then would be Muggle Studies for Peter and Sirius on the Friday (Peter's Care for Magical Creatures had been in the first week). The exams were nearly over and she was feeling relieved about that.

The portrait opened and they watched as Remus came running into the room with a grin on his face. He dropped into the arm chair and looked at his friends. They waited for what seemed like forever before Sirius barked a demand at him.

"My owl delievered."

They cheered happily as they gossiped about the charms they'd used in the duel. Everyone had been nervous about this exam because of the Patronus. The only person who had found it easy to conjure in class had been Alice. Her toad had bounced around tables whilst everyone else's had been faint.

Lily smiled to herself thinking about the class. It had been so much fun trying to guess what everyone would produce nobody had gotten it right at all. Peter's fox had surprised the boy but the most surprising of all had been when James' Honey Badger. When they had been given homework though to find out what the animals represented it hadn't been so strange. The Honey Badger was considered the bravest animal in the world.

As the group sat together Lily couldn't help but laugh. This birthday was far from what she had wanted or expected. Exams, no party and no father to spoil her with gifts. But Pa Evans had sent her jewellery, Petunia had sent her cash and her friends had spoilt her. Really she couldn't complain about it. And she knew that come Friday they would have a party that would end all parties to celebrate the end of exams. And she could consider that a late birthday celebration.


	71. Chapter 71

Chapter 71

"What did you get for the electricity question?"

Peter scrunched up his nose as he thought about it for a moment. Then he looked at Sirius as he answered.

"I said that muggles use it as a source of power to run things such as freezers."

"I said fridges. But that's the same."

"I bet you got the vehicle one easily."

Sirius laughed as they walked up the staircase towards the seventh floor.

"Yep that was easy although I still think muggle transport would be much better if they could fly."

"Their planes fly."

"But flying motorcycles are so much fun. You wait until we get out of here one ride on my bike and you'll be agreeing."

Peter laughed as they walked along the corridor together. A feeling of relief was washing over him as the truth finally sunk in. He had just finished his N.E.W.T exams. It felt so good to be able to say that. When he had gotten up that morning knowing that he and Sirius were the only two with exams left it had felt wrong.

Remus and Branwen had finished their exams on Wednesday when they had sat their Arithmancy exam and the others had all finished yesterday with Potions. Trust that Muggle Studies would be the very last exam. But now it was over.

It actually felt rather surreal if Peter thought about it. Today was only May 13th (which happened to fall on a Friday!) and he'd finished his exams. The school year didn't end until June 24th so that had more than a month left. Yet was there anything left to really learn?

He knew that they were expected to be in class as normal on Monday but surely they wouldn't be having lessons. Maybe they would have career talks again with McGonagall. Maybe Ddraig would continue to teach them some important defence moves. Or maybe they'd just sit in class and talk. Whatever happened he didn't really mind.

As they reached the portrait Sirius broke through his thoughts.

"Do you think the party will have started yet?"

"It's barely five Sirius. Shouldn't we have dinner before the party?"

As he said it though the smile was on his face. The truth was that in the Gryffindor house it was never too early for a party. He did hope that they had at least waited for them because officially exams had only just finished. With the right word the portrait opened and they stepped inside.

Music was pumping from the radio and the tables were lined with food. Some sandwiches and pasties lined one table, while another held cakes and chocolate. The last was filled with an array of drinks. Peter notice that there was no alcohol on that table. The only table that held alcohol was manned by Remus and James.

Pulling out a seat he dropped down at that table and gave a nod at his two friends. Sirius sat opposite him and James gave them both a knowing look.

"It's over."

"We survived."

Sirius made a dramatic gesture as he said it. Remus gave the boy a shove as he laughed a response.

"Seven years of study finished with."

Peter grinned as he reached for the fire whisky

"And now a lifetime of fun."

Four glasses were raised in a toast before they downed them in one.

* * *

"If I have to come up here one more time and tell you to keep it down there will be detentions."

Peter hiccupped into his hand as McGonagall turned and left the room. It wasn't really that late, it was barely midnight. And they had turned the music down low around ten when the younger students had headed up to bed.

Really there were only two year groups left up and carrying on the party. Fifth years and seventh. They had both just finished their exams and needed to let loose. Peter picked up a slice of chocolate cake and headed back to the table.

As he took a bite he looked around. Alice and Branwen were each holding one of Remus' hands trying to teach him some sort of jig. The boy looked a real mess as he kicked one leg up and almost fell to the floor. Peter grinned into the cake.

On the other side of the room James had his arms around Lily and together they sort of shifted from one foot to the other in a slow dance sort of movement. He could see that James was speaking while Lily looked keenly at him. Peter wondered how long it would take the two of them to release how serious their relationship was.

Then on one of the chairs sat Sirius with Amanda on his lap. She was eating a cake very similar to the one on Peter's own plate. But after a few bites she would raise the cake to Sirius' mouth and he would take a bite. Then they laughed as she leaned in and kissed his lips taking away the chocolate that lingered around it.

A little sigh left his lips as he sat there on his own. He knew that he wasn't really alone but sometimes it felt that way. His friends had coupled up and he was left alone, well him and Remus. But that wasn't a coupling either one was willing to make.

For the first time Peter suddenly wondered about what today really marked. The exams were the first step in finishing Hogwarts. His friends were happy in relationships and they wouldn't all be together when they finished school. What would happen? Would they still see each other?

The idea of the future for the first time scared Peter. But as Alice came running towards him he put it to the back of his mind. As she led him up to where Branwen was still trying to teach Remus the dance he laughed as he spun the blonde in time to the music.


	72. Chapter 72

Chapter 72

James aimed and watched as the Quaffle sailed through the hoops. He threw his right arm up in celebration as Amanda pounded his back. They grinned at each other as Fairhead threw the ball out to Harper.

The game had been going for twenty minutes and James felt alive. It was the feeling he always got when in the air. It was as if nothing in the world could ever hurt him. He couldn't help but grin as he watched Branwen knock the ball from Harper's hands and Jackie caught it.

This was his team and he loved them so much. This was how it was meant to be. The thought that after today he wouldn't play with them again was one he'd had to put to the back of his mind. Quidditch was such a major part of his life.

He had considered that he would go professional and he had been given offers. The Bats had contacted him along with the Arrows. He had told them that it wasn't where he was going. But up in the air now he wondered if that was a mistake.

Jackie lost the Quaffle to Woodburn thanks to Gabel's well aimed Bludger and James came out of his trance and hurried off down the pitch. The opposing chaser took aim but Sirius was quick. He was one of the best keepers in a long time and he blocked the left hoop and fed the ball out to Amanda. She was off without hesitation.

The screams of pleasure from the Gryffindors reminded James of games gone by. How this team had changed in seven years! He still remembered his first game. Thomas Christian had been beater and captain then with Ted Tonks his right hand man. It had only been after Christian had left that Branwen had joined the team and Katherine Wood had taken over for Ted.

Then of course Kathy White had been the third chaser with him and Amanda instead of Jaclyn Owen. The three of them had had a wonderful bond in the air and it was one that Kathy now had with her Harpies team mates. Sirius of course had still been keeper, the three of them (Sirius, James and Amanda) had joined together. The only other change was that Randell Maclean now flew in place of Frank.

Yes this was a team that had changed in seven years. As Amanda scored the next goal and the crowds cheered James didn't like to think about how the team would change again in September. He felt certain that Jackie would become the captain, she would be the longest serving member and with Kat's help she would make it great. But they would have a tall task at hand. They would need four new players and a real new era would start for the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

James caught the Quaffle that Kat knocked from Denham's hands and sped off towards the Ravenclaw keeper. As he back passed the ball to Jackie he remembered the time when it had been Billy Morgan in goal. There had been some laughs for them then. Kathy and Amanda had managed to play the boy on more than one occasion and the punch up had been almighty.

Putting his head back in the game he stole off after the Quidditch ball.

James slowed down as Randell made a dive in front of him. He kept the Quaffle in his arm as he dodged passed Harper. Taking aim he let go of the ball as the whistle sounded. He turned to see Randell waving the ball in the air. Gryffindor had won!

With cheers he landed on the ground and was enveloped by his team mates. As the Cup was passed among them he couldn't help but grin. He remembered the good and the bad times. The wins and the losses. And the worse moment ever when he had landed to find the news of his father's death. Quidditch had most certainly marked his life at Hogwarts and the knowledge that it was now over was a tough blow. But he took it as a man as he lifted the Cup to the cheers of his housemates.

* * *

Sorry again that its been a while. I'm in the middle of exams sat one and got another next week. But I thought I'd put a quick post or two up here for you. I know that this chapter isn't much but I wanted to show the end of the Quidditch era because this is something that was fun and really marked their time in school and its the first of a lot of things that are changing for them.

I want to answer something that someone said a while back about the prontus. I know that mine are wrong when you compare them to the books but I've been writing this story for 11 years now on and off. And a lot of the information we have has only come out in recent years. I've tried to put changes in places (such as Snape being adopted so actually hes a half blood not a pure blood as he had thought for most of his life) but there are some things that are established early on that I cant really change now (such as the fact Dumbledore was married to Tad's sister) and the patronus came up in year 3 of this story which was published back in 2004 and I feel that since they were in that year (or was it 5th which was 2006) that I should continue with what I had put them down as and not now alter them to fit the literature as we know it. After all this is fanfiction so there can be changes to it (just look at some stories where people miss Peter out completely just because they dont like him)

I hope that answers the question from, sorry I can't actualyl remember who it was. Anyway hopefully there'll be more post before I start placement in January. There's only 5 chapters left of this year and I have 17 written up for after Hogwarts (in order) another 7 to slip in when we get to the right parts.

Kris xx


	73. Chapter 73

Chapter 73

May ended and June arrived. It was strange how quickly the time was passing everyone by. The final days were approaching and for the seventh years they were soaking in as much of Hogwarts as they now could.

The weather turned warmer as the days lengthened. Nobody wanted to consider the truth that their time was nearly over in this wonderful place that had been their security for such a long time. This was their home and to know that it wouldn't be for much longer was the scariest thing in the world.

It was a lovely Friday afternoon on the 17th of the month and the group were enjoying their free time. Their lessons had officially ended that morning and now the last week would be spent lazing around and getting ready to leave.

The four boys were splashing around in the lake having a water fight whilst the girl lounged under a large hawthorn tree relaxing in the shade that it provided for them. In front of them was a list of items that Alice needed to go through for the wedding that was only a week away.

"Alice where are you going to stay for the week before the wedding?"

The blonde looked up at Amanda and her eyes widened. She hadn't considered that at all. She had been so busy with the wedding that it had slipped her mind. She knew that Frank had seen a number of houses for them and that in the week before the wedding she was going to view two or three of them and they'd make a decision. But other than that she wasn't certain.

"I don't know! What am I going to do?"

Amanda reached over and patted her arm gently.

"Stay with me in Sirius'. James is going to be there as well."

"You're moving in with Sirius!"

Lily's voice was filled with shock and the three other girls looked at her. Amanda simply smiled.

"Why not? I've lived with him the last three summers."

"Because this isn't for six weeks. You're not even married!"

"Let's not go there."

Alice giggled as Amanda made a look that spoke depths. The pair had spent a number of nights talking about Alice's wedding and she had learnt that Amanda had panicked about Sirius and her not marrying. But things had finally settled with that.

"Lily I'm only going to be living with Sirius for three or four weeks. He's only letting me move in temporarily because he wants to have the boys live with him. Apparently they've been planning this since September. Remus and Peter are going to go back home for the first month and sort out their stuff then they'll move in with Sirius and James. But he was kind enough to let me stay with him until I find my own place."

Branwen raised an eyebrow at her as she asked something Alice had been wondering.

"But don't the pair of you want to live together. I mean you are in a very solid relationship."

"Do you want to live with Joe yet?"

Branwen's eyes went wide as she shook her head.

"Hell no. I'm not ready for that sort of commitment."

"Neither are we. Well maybe we are but we want some time where we can have our own space. I mean we are rather intense and it might be good for us to keep out from each others shadows for a bit."

Alice could understand that. That was the one thing that she was worried about. She couldn't wait to be married but she worried that she would need space away from Frank. But she was hoping that if it came down to that she could crash with Amanda. She just always figured it would be in one of Sirius' spare rooms.

"What about you two then? Where are you going to stay?"

Lily gave Amanda a little shrug.

"I'm going to stay with Pa Evans for a while. I know that it won't be long term but we sold our house and I'm not moving in with Petunia. He has promised that I can stay there as long as I like. But I just don't know."

"I'm back in Wales. But I was thinking of looking for somewhere of my own. And I know it's stupid because now Tad is gone the house is empty most of the year with Nhad here. But I would like my own space."

Alice looked at her three friends and shook her head slowly. Sometimes they were so stupid. She cleared her throat and made a suggestion.

"Why don't the three of you look for a place together? I mean we've all lived together for seven years so we know that you can stand each other. Plus none of you will have to go home to empty houses."

The three girls looked at each other and started to smile. Lily was thoughtful as she spoke.

"We could rent a three bedroom house. Muggles do that all the time."

Amanda was watching the boys splashing around in the lake as she commented.

"And we could live in London. That way we'd be close to the boys."

Branwen was the last to say anything.

"Plus we'd be close to the ministry, the hospital and even Diagon Alley."

Alice just watched as her friends agreed on their pact. As they went into details Alice looked at the list for first songs thinking about how she was going to miss out living with them, but then she could still spend a lot of time with them.


	74. Chapter 74

Chapter 74

"We could covert the shed into something that is safe for you."

Remus gave a little shrug as he pushed James' head under the water. His friend kicked out and he fell backwards. Sirius held onto the Quaffle he had been about to toss at Peter and shot him a look.

"I don't see what is wrong with a shed."

"It's situated in the middle of London that's the problem with it. I personally think that the best idea is for me to go back to my parents' house for the full moon. It's worked all these years for me so why risk something else."

"I think Sirius was hoping somewhere closer where we could all play in the moonlight. Your parents' house will make it a bit more difficult for us."

James was very matter of fact as he caught the ball from Peter. Remus could understand what they meant but surely safety was the main point.

"Like you'll have time for the full moon. You three will have jobs that you'll have to put first, then there's the fight and lets not forget girls."

"Jobs just pay the bills. You're more important than them. And as for girls I'm single and both Lily and Amanda will understand."

Remus understood that. As he threw the ball towards James though he looked at Sirius.

"But the problem is that it's your shed and I mean the girls might understand the need for it but will Amanda really want her shed used in that way."

"It isn't her shed –"

Sirius' words were cut off as he dived for the ball that James had aimed his way. When his head appeared from under the surface he met Remus' look as he threw the ball at Peter.

"Amanda won't be living with us."

"What? But she's your girlfriend."

"I know. She's staying a few weeks until she finds somewhere to live. We thought it might be better to wait a while before we live together. Besides my house is a bachelor pad. How will that work if there are girls living there?"

Remus caught the ball and passed it back to Peter with a shrug. But James was quick to reply.

"She might not be living there officially but I can see her spending a hell of a lot of time round there."

"And what's that suppose to mean?"

"Why don't we ask Pete?"

All eyes went to the smallest of them and Remus noticed the blush on his cheeks. He jumped for the ball from James and Remus was sure he purposely dropped it so he could duck out for a bit.

"Peter?"

He turned and gave Sirius a sheepish look before answering.

"James asked me why I'd told you that I'd once walked in on him and Amanda. So I just said that it was because I'd done the same thing again."

Remus chuckled as Peter threw the ball at James. As he caught it he laughed and looked at his friend.

"Made me understand why you asked me those questions though. And well I just figured that since there'd be no chance of Peter walking into your bedroom in the house that you'd have Amanda there a lot."

"You realise that nothing has actually happened between us."

"Yet!"

Remus couldn't help but add that little word. He saw Sirius turn a slightly brighter colour as he aimed the ball at him.

"Ouch."

Sirius' throw connected squarely with Remus' head. The others all laughed as Remus moved to get the ball.

"Do you think things will stay the same when we leave? Do you think we'll always be like this?"

There was a wishful sound to James' voice as they all looked at each other. It was Peter that broke the silence.

"Of course it will. Why would things change? We're going to live together; we're going drink together and no matter what else happens we're always going to be friends. I think we're just nervous because this is a big change. But we'll always make time for each other, no matter what happens. You'll see."

Remus liked the sound of that. They were all nodding when Sirius spoke up.

"I'm hungry. It must be time for dinner now. Let's get the girls and go eat."

As they made their way out of the lake Remus was thoughtful. Things were about to change and he knew that maybe it wouldn't be for the better. But there was one thing he was sure of. He had friends that were going to last him a lifetime. No matter what life would throw at them they would be together forever.


	75. Chapter 75

Chapter 75

The sun was high the radio was blasting music and Peter felt so relaxed. Sundays had always been good days in Hogwarts. Nobody ever really did anything those days, unless it was homework for the following day. But classes were over and in a couple of days they'd be gone. So they were making the most of it.

Plus this wasn't just any Sunday. This was their last birthday celebration in Hogwarts. Peter grinned as he picked up a sausage roll and took a bite. His birthday's had ranged through the years but this one was a good one. Last year had been a different matter.

Around him he watched as his friends mucked around like they always had. It was so strange to think how much had changed in what felt like no time. He could remember coming here on that first train ride fearful that he'd make no friends and wouldn't get into a house. Now seven years later he had the best friends in the world and was basically a qualified wizard.

"_You're listening to Gwyneth's Grooving Getups. Gwyneth is currently in Argentina on a beach the lucky witch. So I'm Joseph Wild and I'll be here for the next hour. I'd like to dedicate this first song to Peter Pettigrew who is celebrating his final birthday in Hogwarts today. Here's hoping you guys leave the rest of the school some food. And I'll catch you soon mate."_

Stubby Boardman's vocals wobbled out of the radio as the Hobgoblins newest song began to play. Peter sat comfortably on the blanket that they'd set out under the usual Hawthorn tree that they had gathered around and watched his friends. He had always been a watcher and he smiled as he took in the different activities.

Sirius and James had taken another Quaffle and were happily tossing it over Amanda's head. The girl was getting rather ratty about it and Peter could see her fingers itching towards her wand. It was always funny to see the three of them together like this. They were each as bad as the other when it came to losing. He wondered which of the two Amanda would end up cursing and if she could make it seem like an accident considering one was the Head Boy.

Above him in the tree were Alice and Branwen. Another tradition that seemed not to have passed was racing to see who could get the highest. Alice usually won this and Joe tended to tease her that she was part monkey that was why.

Then down by the lake were Remus and Lily. Lily was stretched out on her back enjoying the sun whilst Remus sat on a rock with his feet dangling into the lake. They were lost in some private conversation ignorant of what was happening around them.

Peter picked up a sandwich and washed it down with a butterbeer as he wondered if things would always be this was in Hogwarts. They were leaving and come September a new group of youngsters would be starting. Would they build such solid friendships, would they muck around the same way that they had.

As Peter stood up and walked over to join Remus and Lily he figured he really didn't care what the future held for other students. He just knew what his future was and he could live with that.


	76. Chapter 76

Chapter 76

James tiptoed around the corner and looked down the marble staircase. It was all clear. Turning he gave a nod at Remus who followed him towards the Great Hall looking as if they were just heading for dinner.

As they reached the door a large explosion was heard from two floors above. Screams erupted in the Hall as people ran out thinking that there was an attack. Laughter drew the attention of some people as Sirius and Peter pelted down the marble staircase. Close behind them was the young new caretaker Filch.

As they ran towards the main door Sirius moved slightly to the side and handed James a piece of paper. Then he was between people and through the main door and out into the grounds. Filch had seen the exchange and as he reached towards them James quickly pulled his wand out.

"Mischief managed."

The map began to fade. But it wasn't quick enough and James knew that Filch had seen some of the details.

"WHAT IS GOING ON?"

Professor Dumbledore was in the doorway to the Great Hall. Filch came to a stop right in front of James.

"Black and Pettigrew just blew up one of the upstairs classrooms. And whatever they used they just gave to Potter."

As the students were herded back to the tables for their final meal in Hogwarts that year Dumbledore came over towards him. Remus bumped James shoulder in a manner that said hide the map. James was a little slow though.

As he shoved it in his pocket Dumbledore gave him a look.

"What is that?"

"Just a blank piece of paper."

"It wasn't blank Sir. I saw writing on it. He said something and tapped his wand to it and then all the writing faded away."

"No it didn't."

Remus sounded defensive and James was certain that was the reason Dumbledore allowed Filch to take the paper from him. Then James and Remus were issued with telling offs before being sent for dinner. They watched as Dumbledore and Filch headed outside to find the other two.

* * *

"That was brilliant! Filch fell for it just like we said he would."

Peter dropped onto his bed a dopey grin on his face. James closed his trunk lid and looked around. His three friends were in bed ready for their last night. James gave a wink at Peter as he answered playfully.

"Yep like he would have caught us if we hadn't wanted him to."

Peter laughed as Sirius gave a small sigh.

"I still think we should have kept the map and given it to the first one of our kids to come here."

"But that would be too easy. It's like we said the next person to own that map will have earned the right."

James pulled the cover back as he spoke. They had discussed the map in great depth and it was clear that none of them were going to need it now. So after taking a vote (which Sirius lost) it was decided to let Filch catch them using it on the final day and get it confiscated. That way one day in the future a prankster worthy of the Marauders would have to break in and steal it. Maybe it would be one of their kids, or maybe it wouldn't. But this was going to be the best way of keeping the Marauders alive in Hogwarts.

As Sirius argued with Peter about it some more James simply closed his eyes and went to sleep for the final time in Hogwarts.


	77. Chapter 77

Chapter 77

The steam billowed through the clear sky as the students pushed their way along the platform towards the train. There was giddy energy in the air as the excitement of returning home for another summer encompassed the students.

Lily stood against the stone wall and watched. It was so strange to see how eager they were to get on. She didn't feel like that, not this year. In the past she had been just like them. Among the first on the train but knowing she wouldn't be coming back slowed her down now.

"Lily come on we don't want to be left behind?"

"Why not?"

Branwen side stepped a rowdy fourth year who was having a screaming match with a boy who was clearly becoming her ex.

"Come on this isn't the end Lily."

"It feels like it."

Branwen gave a little nod as she looked towards the gleaming red paint of the Hogwarts Express. Lily wondered if her friend was thinking about all the times they had travelled back and fore on it. Never had it occurred to Lily just how quickly that tradition would come to an end.

"I think this is a new chapter. Nhad told me that it feels like the world is ending when we leave and then we get out there and find that it's only the start."

"But everything is about to change."

Branwen took Lily's hand gently and gave it a squeeze.

"Things have to change. Now come on before James gets back off to come and find you."

Branwen towed Lily through the thinning crowd and onto the train. As she stepped up off the platform her stomach gave a little turn. This was it. She was saying goodbye to childhood and about to embark on adult life.

* * *

I know its not much of an ending but Hogwarts isn't the ending. So get ready for the last part of the story **Friends Forever Maybe Not life after Hogwarts **it'll be coming soon.


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